Does it? Does blogging make you feel small?
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I’m worried about your answer. And I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately. Because sometimes this world of blogging can become just one more opportunity for the biggest Liar of them all to tell you that you don’t measure up. Especially if our blogging identity starts to feel like our true identity; then we are in danger of living and dying on the number of “likes” or comments one post gets.

Because, let’s face it, we want to be liked. We need to know we matter. It’s in our DNA.

“I realized there was this other part of me, and it was a big part of me, that needed something outside myself to tell me who I was.And so [it] became obvious; I was very concerned with getting other people to say I was good or valuable or important because the thing that was supposed to make me feel this way was gone.” ~Donald Miller, Searching For God Knows What (p.44).

The truth of that statement resonates all the way down to my toes. I feel it in the hairs that stand up on the back of my neck and the achey breaky feeling in my tummy that wants to know it matters with a hunger that is insatiable.

We have a built in need to be valued. And blogging feeds that need with comments fattening our inbox and fan pages fluttering their eyelashes, lovingly reminding us that we are well liked.

But what if the comment box is empty? What if the fans are few and far between? Does a voice whisper to you late in the night that you are irrelevant when you’ve shared parts of your soul and no one has showed up to read them?

That voice is a liar.

Because here’s the thing: you are wonderful, whether or not you feel wonderful. You matter because God says so. Everything else is fluff. To convince you I would make you s’mores if I could. Because sometimes sweet food speaks louder than sweet words. And while you ate all that sticky goodness, I would tell you just how delicious you truly are.

How your value comes from the God who made a fool of Himself in His crazy, amazing love for you. How you matter because of Him, not because of how witty your tweets are, how many facebook likes you have, or how high the number of people who subscribe to your blog.

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16.

He gave up everything – even Himself – for you.

Hear that. Believe that. Eat that. It is the only way I know to satisfy the need to be loved. Since He created the need, let Him fill it for you.

And I hope you discover you are not so small after all. Not even a little bit.

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by Lisa-Jo, The Gypsy Mama

 

Heart and Globe by Show Offs Art

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  • Jennifer

    Lisa,
    You will never know how much I needed that today or how your words just penetrated deep into my soul. It’s been driving me crazy lately that I haven’t been able to get any visitors to my blog and I kept on wondering “what’s wrong with me” and “I must not be any good at this writing thing”, when really deep down I just needed Jesus to fill my cup and an encouraging word from someone who cared. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. (intentionally and with a grateful heart leaving my blog address out ;))
    Jennifer

  • http://www.momssharpeningmoms.com Kristen@Moms Sharpening Moms

    Umm, Lisa-Jo, in case I’ve forgotten to mention this before, I. LOVE. YOU. More than Sonic cheddar peppers and cherry limeades. Like totally.
    Ah yes…what we feel is not always truth, but God’s character and validity is always truth. He says what He means and He means what He says, and He says we mean something-everything!-to Him! I need to play this build-me-up tape in my head when the world’s tear-me-down one is blaring!
    Thank you for this! Have fun with your gal pals in AR!

  • http://www.gritandglory.com alece

    such a good reminder for me to keep my heart in check. i easily get caught up in the seeming popularity contest of it all far more often than i like to admit. and, to be honest, it adds to that underlying sense of “not enough” that i spend my life fighting. and where’s the joy in that?!
    when my motives are right, blogging truly does grow my joy. thank you for the nudge to check my pride, fear, and insecurity at the door today and remember what my blog is really all about. and also what *i* am all about. simply because i’m His.
    lovin’ you LJ.

  • http://www.lauraleighparker.com Laura @Life Overseas

    This is so perfectly timed in my little world. I have just been convicted of pursuing the wrong thing,
    for the wrong reasons,
    too much.
    And the results of getting sucked in are:
    belittling the relationships with my kids and husband
    making comments or doing posts with the wrong motives
    caring way too much.
    Really, truly, thank you for the reminder.

  • http://www.kandrayoung.com Kandra

    totally needed that! And I even had to quote the “You matter because God says so. Everything else is fluff.” on twitter/facebook! What a great thing to remember!

  • http://www.walkingwithangels.wordpress.com sara

    Like many of the others, i really needed to read this. I blog as it gives me an outlet, to write to share, yet somedays I visit other blogs and see the vast amount of comments and I feel so useless. As if what i have written is worthless. I know it isnt and I also know I shouldn’t write for others, but knowing and doing sometimes fall far from each other.
    Thanks for reminding me of the amazing love xxx

  • http://upwardgirl.wordpress.com Lisa

    You wrote this for me and I wish I could hug you. Like, a lot. The loser enemy has been lying to me a lot lately about that very thing, but I keep hearing that still, small Voice whisper: ‘Remember, I am your audience. Write for Me.’ Bless you, Lisa-Jo!

  • http://southernproletariat.blogspot.com/ rhonda

    You’ve done it again..how is it you happen to post something at the exact time I need to hear it? oh yeah…its that God-thing ;)
    Seriously, this is one of the reasons I eagerly click on you in my reader (then follow you over here too). You say what I need when I need it…Thanks sweetie…

  • http://www.lifewithfourboys.com Denise

    Blogging brings me a huge amount of joy….just because I just love to write it down (or type it down). And just the same, this blog post was just ever so good….so to the point and right to the heart. Thanks so much…again. I keep getting more and more out of your posts every time I check them out.

  • Renee

    I know this to be true. It hurts when I depend on others to give me what only God can give. I’ve tried to keep blogging at a level that won’t give me that let down I’ve experienced in many areas of my life. Cliques exist in school, church and even in blogland. But I know God says none is higher than the other in His eyes. Thank you for the reminder.
    No sweets, please, because blogging makes you fat anyway. ;)
    I’m with Jennifer – no blog address needed!

  • http://homewiththeboys.net Erin M.

    Yes! Yes! Yes! Thank you for posting this! I think women in general, not just bloggers, need to hear this SO badly! You speak right to the heart EVERY TIME! ~MUAH~

  • http://bethanymariesmith.blogspot.com Bethany Smith

    Totally needed to hear that! Thank YOU!!!!

  • http://www.servantsheart.wordpress.com Stacy

    What a great post. There is a real danger in blogging…the potential to base your worth on readers and comments. I’ve done it. I’ve written a post that was from the heart only to have no one comment. I’ve written something that just sort of came to me and had multiple people comment. It seems there is no rhyme or reason.
    People are fickle…but God is not. When I bare my soul to Him – He always comments. He speaks to me. He gets me.
    Hope you’re having a great day, Lisa-Jo!

  • http://holley.dayspring.com Holley Gerth

    Hey, you with the beautiful heart, I love ya. Whether here on these pages or in person, you are so good at making us all feel loved, valued, and appreciated. Thanks for being a hug from God when we need it most, Lisa-Jo.

  • http://prairieair.blogspot.com Jenni in KS

    It’s always nice to get those reassuring comments or see your number of visitors or followers grow, but my blog is small. I know I will never be a famous blogger, and I’m quite content with that. Even when there are no comments and the number of visitors drop, I remember that the real reason I am blogging is because it’s something I need to do and it has nothing to do with whether other people read and agree with me or not. I don’t get jealous of people with mega blogs. I’m happy for them and thankful that I don’t have that added pressure. I have seen jealousy in the blogging world, though, and it ain’t pretty. Jealousy never is.
    One of the things I like about blogging is that it helps me to think, and then writing forces me to more perfectly form and shape those thoughts into something understandable both to me and to others. It helps me process my feelings and loose thoughts. It also helps make me more aware and appreciative. Not everything I post is positive or uplifting. Some things I probably shouldn’t write at all, but I’m learning that. If blogging makes me feel small, it is only because it opens my eyes more to this great big world, God’s vast creation in which He has lovingly placed me. I may be small, but I am loved by God and important to Him. That is something which never ceases to amaze me.

  • Donna

    What bloggers should realize is that people like me who love to read the blogs don’t like to write comments but we still are encouraged. And I don’t do any “likes” or “fans” on facebook because it’s just a family forum for me. So you are right — your value comes from God, not your readers.

  • Paula Jean

    Thanks, Lisa-Jo! :)

  • http://www.queenieslittlekingdom.com wanda

    Great post!! Very true! I’ve felt the twinge of WHY a few times too!
    I never started blogging to be on top! I did it for me.
    I can see genuine good people on blogs and other’s trying to PUSH their way to stardom. The Godly blogs that have no big agenda bless me most.
    I’m thankful for your frankness….it could be a trap if I let satan ruin it over stats!

  • http://www.ourmellifluouslife.wordpress.com Jena

    Today was the perfect day to read this. I have been feeling pretty small the past little while and sometimes its nice to remember that our stats really don’t matter.
    Thank you so much for writing this.

  • http://ifmeadowsspeak.blogspot.com/ tammy@if meadows speak

    Lisa-Jo, I needed that! Just yesterday I was thinking “I’m just ONE voice in a SEA of voices.” I’m seem to drown among them and wonder if my ONE really matters. As I was encouraging myself in the Lord by reminding myself I write for Him, the ONE and only, I came across this today!! You worked His way straight to me in your post. Lots of Love to you! ((big hug))

  • http://profile.typepad.com/pensieve Robin ~ PENSIEVE

    I coulda written this, Lisa-Jo and have in my head a buncha times and in conversation a few, too. How wise of you and brave, even, to speak these truths into the lives of those who read, who need to be reminded of our value in Christ.
    From a sheer time perspective, I’m afraid our blogs/social media “toys” are idols; which convicts and concerns me…. If we’re living in this space, no wonder we find value (or lack thereof) when comments are rare and non-existent.
    {{hugs}} to YOU! :)

  • http://nothingswasted-deb.blogspot.com/ Deb Martell

    All of our worth comes from Him and if our words are coming from the heart He has given us…no need for any other affirmation…we rest knowing He is enough :)

  • http://www.likeadayoff.blogspot.com Beth

    Yep, been here. In fact, I took a while off from blogging a few months ago, one of the reasons being that I started to feel my identity getting a little too attached to whether or not people commented on my posts or how many followers I had (and was always watching how many followers other people had). Wondering how I could be more like-able via blog. And then realized that was kind of silly- but oh so common, since so many of us are just seeking to be valued and appreciated in our lives and are not feeling it. Good post, Lisa Jo, to remind us that our worth is not defined by comments or followers, but by the One who gave us the ability to write the very words we type. Love it.

  • http://www.justfollowingjesus.com elizabeth

    I needed this today…was feeling a bit small. Thanks for reminding me of what is really real.

  • http://www.prairielilyarts.com/ susan

    I love the music of your heart as it sings to the ear of mine… for your instrument is His. And the s’mores… well, bonus! :)

  • http://www.jennyrain.com Jenny

    love this Lisa-Jo… thank you for the reminder :)

  • http://christinahomemaker.blogspot.com/ Christina

    Thank you.

  • http://thebrokenquill.com ~Brenda

    Oh my goodness. I was struggling so bad with this just two days ago, and this is soooo true. Thank you for the affirmation that we are love with an everlasting love and an everlasting God. I love it!

  • http://www.inspiredtoaction.com Kat @ Inspired To Action

    Wonderfully inspiring and well said. Thanks!

  • http://www.gatherinspirit.com Michelle @ Gather Inspirit

    Lisa-Jo, this post captures the essence of our mission at Gather Inspirit! Our heart’s desire is to convince our blogging friends that their value is not in their stats. I know God wants to convince us all of that very thing. He is longing for us to embrace it! Thank you for sharing this.
    fondly,
    m :)

  • http://overflowingwell.blogspot.com Angela

    Wow! This is something that I didn’t think would happen to me, but recently, after sharing a personal testimony, and only getting a couple comments, I did feel small. I can see how easy it is to fall into that trap. Being someone only a couple months into this blogging thing, I constantly have to ask God to keep me humble.
    For me, this means to not actively pursue avenues to ‘grow’ my blog so to speak. If it is meant to grow, then I am putting that in God’s hands, not my own. I just have to trust that this thing I’m doing is not just to nurture my own soul, but that it is truly something I feel led to do. Even if that means a seed is planted in only one person, that they might give their life to Christ as a result. I take comfort in knowing that I may never ‘see’ the result of this, but believe in my heart that it is happening. Thanks for this reminder to stay grounded and secure in my identity.

  • http://myhomeinthesmokies.blogspot.com/ Joy Ellis

    Awesome post!!

  • http://godsdreamsforme.blogspot.com Jeri @godsdreamsforme

    Beautiful :D Empowering Truth..Thank You. “Each person is given something to do that shows who God is.” 1 Cor 12:7 (MSG)

  • http://tonotdecideistodecide.blogspot.com Haelie

    Amen. Words cannot express my gratitude for this.

  • http://elainaavalos.blogspot.com Elaina Avalos

    Thank you so much for this post. I needed it.

  • Marla

    This may be the reason why I don’t blog…
    I already know the best ‘blog commenter’ ever! My Lord & Savior Jesus Christ.
    He tells it like it truly is. Not only does He keep me humble, He also keeps me encouraged!
    God bless you Lisa-Jo;)

  • melissa

    like so many others this serves as a beautiful reminder…
    a remnider God has been whispering to my heart for awhile…
    a reminder that my husband tells me when I’m down…
    it’s so easy to feel worthless as a blogger…
    just yesterday i was “entertaining” my husband talking about the tiers of bloggers and who talks to who on twitter and unless you are a “somebody” you don’t really get much attention…
    life is just that way, so it’s easy to be discouraged.
    praise god is he “el ro-i” – the god who sees!

  • http://www.alittletoocrazytobecool.blogspot.com cathyjoy

    I don’t know how you do it but you do. You manage to look right inside my soul. And? You manage to make me feel good when everything else makes me feel like crap. You are one special person Lisa Jo. Also? In case I haven’t told you lately? I LOVE YOU!!!

  • http://www.jennifervdavis.com Jennifer

    Thanks, Lisa-Jo, for speaking encouragement in the truth! I had no idea the blogging world was this kind of environment before I started. Now I find that there is a tricky line between working hard to honor what I think God wants me to do and promoting myself instead of letting Him do the work of bringing others to my blog (if that’s even His will). Something I’ve been praying a lot about lately….

  • http://thescienceofmusic.blogspot.com Rachel @ the science of music

    Many times I feel small – like part of a group, but not really invited to that group. There are blogs that fill me up, and ones don’t. Sometimes, it’s individual posts that do that. I have a facebook page for my blog – with two likes. Me and a friend whom I know in real life.
    But then I have a conversation with my mom or a close friend who reads the blog and my words have touched them. And I’m reminded of why I blog in the first place. It’s because I have things I want to share with my family, especially my mom. I express myself better in writing, so I started the blog. When I hear that a post was appreciated by one person, it no longer matters that the post was only read by one person. What matters is that I said something that made a difference to someone. That makes my time worthwhile.

  • Chantal Marczinski

    I sooo needed to hear that today. Thank you!

  • http://lindaspatchworkquilt.blogspot.com/ linda

    The more I read your words, the more I love you Lisa-Jo. This is absolutely perfect. I cannot imagine there is one of us who didn’t need to hear these encouraging, wise words.
    Thank you.

  • http://www.thegypsymama.com Lisa-Jo @thegypsymama

    You guys? You are so beautiful. And there is nothing small about you. Not. One. Thing.
    With arms wrapped tight around the beauty that is you,
    Lisa-Jo

  • http://profile.typepad.com/6p0120a5cbdca0970c Lisa-Jo @ The Gypsy Mama

    Thank you for sharing your hearts here today.

  • http://profile.typepad.com/6p0120a5cbdca0970c Lisa-Jo @ The Gypsy Mama

    You are his through and through and it shines through in everything you do and say and give and love.
    Thank you for being you!
    LJ

  • http://breathsoffaith.blogspot.com Tammy

    I blog and most days I don’t have any visitors. But really when I write I do it to visit with God. I am writing to Him and when someone does stop and say they were blessed by my words I smile and say thank you. Your post was great reminder and smores would be wonderful

  • http://www.traditionalsimplicity.com Michelle

    Such an answer to a prayer. Thank you! I’ve really been praying about the direction God wants me to take my blog and this is just one more reminder, he needs to be the center of it. Thank you!

  • http://www.andthensomore.blogspot.com Brianna

    Lisa-Jo! Thank you. For the truth. It is, unfortunately, a hard truth to live. Which actually makes no sense when you think about it. I mean, Creator God of the universe not only notices me, He knows who I am intimately, and STILL He is nuts about me!
    Yes, a truly needed blog post for so many of us, I think.

  • http://www.sandeeblogspot.com sandee

    I love how Ann V and others, turn off the comment box… I never get comments, or mostly never, because I know my momma and auntie are all who read. and that is fine with me.
    I wish I most often would write for an audience of 4 (my 4 kids who may later read my babblings)…but you are right, you can start to look at someone’s online identity as who they really are and that everyone else is perfect and has it all together….

  • http://www.paigeknudsen.blogspot.com paige

    such a great reminder!
    thank you for your words today….i needed that
    xo

  • http://dulceheart.wordpress.com journeywriter

    Right on time for me. Just blogged about this today too.
    Thanks so much Lisa.
    Blessings,
    journeywriter

  • http://somegirlswebsite.com SomeGirl

    That was just plain BEAUTIFUL! Thank you! ? Michelle

  • http://www.themessymom.com Natalie (the messy mom)

    One thing led me to another which led me here and I know it was the Father speaking to me. This was exactly what I was dealing with today. All the way down to the sweets. It was EXACTLY what I needed. Thank you for being obedient in sharing.

  • http://www.collinsincorona.blogspot.com Christine

    Incredible post! Timed perfectly. Really needed to hear this. Thank you so much!!

  • http://www.3turkeys.net Mary

    Lisa-Jo, I’m writing this through tears. Just this afternoon someone tweeted a “Dude, Seriously” comment in reference to a post I wrote on my blog. I’ve never had a bad comment so this really hurt and has thrown me for a loop all day. I’ve been feeling so depressed and questioning if I wrote something wrong to deserve such a snarky comment. I reread it. I said what I meant and I meant what I said. This person disagreed with me and did it rudely and it hurt my feelings. Thank you for this very timely reminder that it’s God’s opinion that matters. Ironic, because I wrote about God being the source of true happiness.

  • http://winsomewoman.blogspot.com/ Kim

    “when you’ve shared parts of your soul and no one has showed up to read them?” This says it all for me. Blogging has been a window into my soul by both the words I post and the heart that alternately leaps and aches with comments received and not. Thank you for your words. They encourage me to be true, to trust, and to blog/write for my enraptured audience of one . . my loving Father.

  • http://www.teawithtiffany.com Tiffany Stuart

    Thank you. I needed this treat today, truth wrapped in sweet s’mores.

  • http://openmyearslord.blogspot.com Janis

    You’ve described the world of blogging perfectly, and probably the whole social media thing. Sorry to say I fall into that lie too often. When the comments are few, it’s hard to remind myself that I am doing this because I heard the Lord ask me to invest whatever talent He gave me.
    Thank you for your post. I saw it featured in High Calling Blogs.
    Blessings,
    Janis

  • http://aspiretoleadaquietlife.blogspot.com/ A Simple Country Girl

    And I reckon you would serve s’mores because your heart is equally as sweet. Thank you for this!
    Blessings.

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    I learned a lot from your blog, thanks.

  • http://www.stumblingaroundinthelight.com Teri Miller

    Okay, yup. Precisely what I needed to hear, precisely tonight. Feeling a little not-as-small-as-before…
    Thanks.
    Deeply.

  • http://www.bethjones.net Beth

    Thank you so much for writing this. I have felt this way at times, not so much about comments, but about lack of ebook and other product sales – and sometimes I feel outside the “online clique” of bloggers. This was such an encouragement about our value (despite our “messes”)! —– “You matter because God says so. Everything else is fluff.” Amen! Thanks so much for this tonight – what a blessing!