My youngest daughter likes to borrow trouble. When I tuck her in at night she asks things like,
“Will it hurt when I have a baby?” or “How do you know what to do when you’re a grown up?”
A few nights ago she even made the stretch to grandchildren, asking,
“Mommy, who will my grandkids be? How will I know them?”
Heady stuff for a five year old. I usually give an age appropriate answer, and then I focus on something more immediate and say,
“Let’s just worry about what dress you’re going to wear tomorrow”.
I know where she comes by this trait, this propensity to borrow from tomorrow or next year or next decade. I like to borrow too. There are nights when I’m tucked into bed, keeping company with my own questions, and wanting answers.
When will we move again?
Will I be happy there?
What am I going to be when I grow up?
What’s the two year plan? The five year, the ten year?
There are times when I grow weary of my own troubles, so I look to steal someone else’s.
What are they going to do?
How will they manage?
When will they figure out their two year plan?
And the borrowing and stealing begins. I take what doesn’t belong to me, a burden I’m not called to carry, and I put it on and try to make it fit.
Sometimes I find myself trying to spiritualize it by praying:
I know I’ve been worrying for half an hour about something that hasn’t happened yet. I also know that you are sovereign, but I thought I would help you by coming up with every possible scenario and it’s likely solution. Now that I’ve reached a point where I can’t carry this anymore, I’m going to let you have a turn.
And His reply is usually,
“Let’s just worry about what dress you’re going to wear tomorrow.”
Sometimes there is an age appropriate answer, sometimes there’s no answer for the burden at all. But always, there is this…lets just think about tomorrow. Not next year, not next decade, not next move or child or major life decision. Only tomorrow. Because it is in tomorrow that I can choose to wear my burdens, or I can choose to clothe myself in His rest.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28