Maybe it’s taken all of my thirty-seven years
and
maybe it’s been a winding road
but
I think
I am
finally
beginning
to
know
me.
I like security.
And
I am guilty
of looking for it
in the arms of my husband
in the balance in my bank account
in the qualities of my friendships.
Over the past several years
these traditional forms of security
have taken a bit of a free fall in my life.
And
I have been forced
to land
square
at the feet of Jesus Himself.
But even after all that falling
and
His gracious picking me back up,
my heart
is still tempted
to jump back to those very familiar forms
of (counterfeit) peace.
So I must do the hard work of
daily (hourly) directing
my heart
my hands
my mind
to
the ultimate
security.
If I pick up a book and the back cover says something like “Smart women leave messy marriages. They discover their independence. They refuse to forgive. They think about themselves first.”
I put it down.
I put it down.
If a song comes on the radio about seeking revenge,
about hurting as you’ve been hurt,
I change that channel.
I play another tune.
If a friend encourages me to disparage my spouse,
to indulge in self-pity,
to decide what the world owes me and to focus on receiving my rightful dues,
I step away from that conversation.
I share my story before a different heart.
The world preaches about strong in ways both large and small.
And the women who seem to embody mainstream strong
are takers, pushers.
I say to that . . .
Don’t talk to me about strength.
I know strength.
And I know
that
strength
looks different
in each body.
And it’s only
lack of experience
that leads us to believe that
one strength must resemble another strength
any more than we should believe that
one woman must resemble another woman.
All kinds of strength keep us strong.
Staying.
Leaving.
Fighting.
Quitting.
And all these years
and all this journey
are showing me
that although
my strength
does not look like
your strength
I am
in fact
still strong.
by Lacey Keigley, So Every Day
Leave a Comment
Danita Goode says
Your message really hit a home run in my heart. Thanks for sharing.
Marilyn says
Pure joy, this! 🙂
Grace {Hope} says
This caught me at a perfect time! This is one of the most powerful posts I have read since reading in courage. This is simply wonderful..
Everytime i read something on here i feel so honoured because you dont know me, im on the other side of the world and yet im allowed to see a part of your heart.
.. and it makes my heart smile, with yours 🙂
Thank you for that.
It brings healing.
I’ve had many times in my life where I’ve felt weak but looking back Gods strength was covering me.
I’ve had people in those times tell me Im doing things wrong, im not behaving correctly, or i am being too emotional, too weak.
But you hit the nail on the head, strength is different to everyone, and only yourself and God know your true strength, because no-one else sees your heart fully, what youve been through and what youre facing now.
It reminded me of the quote i see on fridge magnets that says..
‘women are like tea-bags… you never know how strong they are until you put them in hot water’
🙂
than you once again, God bless you x
Lacey says
Thank you for your kind words.
I know I have often been so tempted to let my actions be what I think other people would do in the same situation.
But that isn’t strength.
And that isn’t trust in God either – is it?
I love the tea-bag quote. SO true of all of us. What we are is already in there, but it is when we are tested that all the stuff – good and bad – is brought to eh surface.
Grace {Hope} says
Thats so true.
I think many times in my life i have looked to others..and tried to imitate what i think i ‘should’ do.
Mainly because I process verbally, it helps me to ‘talk it out’ but this also means people give their opinons, and this also means I can get more confused.
Now ive learnt, after alot of heartache to go to God first….. and (shock!) Hes always there 😉
I think youre right about it comes with experience…
I’ve found comparing myself to other women is also a huge thing, i fail at doing this well – alot, but there is grace even for me..
x
Anonymous says
“I put it down…. I put it down” – Thank you for sharing!
Holley Gerth says
So beautiful. I love how you said it, “All kinds of strength keep us strong.” Thank you for sharing your heart and words with us, Lacey!
Tina says
Faith,Hope,Love,Grace and Mercy….ALL work together!!!
Hallelujah!!! AMEN!!!
No better place to be when you feel so hard pressed, then at the feet of JESUS…reaching out to HIM and saying….”Abba help me I need you”, then just climbing into HIS lap and letting HIM comfort you!!!
Thank you for sharing. 🙂
Jeri @godsdreamsforme says
Directing us to wise choices – put it down, play another tune, step away…
Showing us our beautiful uniqueness in how our our strengths all look different and we are still strong.
This really is an awesome community 😀
Beautiful in Him says
So TRUE! Thanks for the timely reminder!
Deb Martell says
Amen Lacey!
Donna says
This spoke to me. I feel weak most days, some days weaker still, but I am strong in living out each day, longing to know Him, and choosing to trust Him…
Anonymous says
Wow!! So true…very well said. Thanks for sharing
Reese says
What in the world? Where have you been hiding, Lacey. 🙂 I love this post.your style.and your word choice. Thank you for sharing with us. I esp. love “counterfeit peace.” I am going to chew on this one all weekend…….
be well
Mommy 2EandS says
Reese, if you like this, you should really checkout her blog. Great stuff about famil life and picture of her cute kids too!!
Lacey, thanks for sharing (followed the link from your blog). I think there is a lot in this i needed to be reminded of.
Janis@Open My Ears Lord says
So glad you’ve found real strength in the only one who can be our strong tower.
Blessings,
Janis
(in) courage post | So Every Day says
[…] To read all of this post, you’re going to have to click on over to (in)courage. Categorized under: God's Pursuit of Me, Story. Tagged with: (in)courage, God's pursuit of me, guest post, strength. […]
Sarah Markley says
LACEY! How come you didn’t tell me you were posting here!!! I gotta find you at the bottom of a page buried in a few clicks. I would have tweeted you out, girl.
Anyways, i always love the way you write. so much. i think you are seriously talented.
hope you are well. =)
Leanne Boone says
I have the privilege of seeing how strong you are first hand…and it is beautiful as are YOU!
alece says
“although my strength does not look like your strength, i am in fact still strong…”
sometimes it’s hard to see that i AM strong, when it doesn’t seem that way compared to the strength i see all around me. even though people tell me i’m strong, i don’t believe it. my day to day, moment by moment looks/feels/smells nothing like strength. and so i dismiss their words as untrue.
i just need a different yard stick, i think. and maybe then… maybe then, i’d believe….