“The Christian’s hope is sound because it is founded upon the character of God and the redeeming work of His Son Jesus Christ. For this reason Peter could call it “a living hope” (1 Peter 1:3). It is living because it rests on reality and not on fancy. It is not wishful dreaming but vital expectation with the whole might of the Most High behind it.” (A.W. Tozer The Size of the Soul, Chapter 20 )
I can tell by the way he’s hoping back and forth, from one foot to the other, he’s nervous. His skinny arms are tight at his sides, like a little soldier but he’s out of formation with that nervous jig he’s dancing. I notice how he didn’t volunteer this time to go first. I remember that fear.
He steps up onto the diving platform and I can see his growing muscles tense, the water shimmering on his perfect, nutty skin- he hesitates for a minute, then he just leaps.
We rally and clap for him as he emerges and I can see his grin from across the pool. His chest swelling a little with pride, with the triumph of having overcome. The satisfaction of having been willing, radiates in his confident steps as he walks the pool deck.
He did it.
Watching him step up to repeat the move, my lungs empty in a heavy sigh, I’m remembering all of the times when I was his age, and beyond, all of the moments of stepping up, taking that leap. And I wonder if I will ever stop being afraid. Faith cancels out fear. I learned this recently, and God repeats the lesson it seems almost daily for me lately. Constant opportunities present to choose fear, or faith, opportunities to hold on to hope. I’d like to say the choice is simple. Sometimes it is.
I’m still neck deep in learning how not to fear. In fearing, I lose hope. I’m still ripping the seams of this suffocating pride of mine that chokes out flickers of faith. I’m still reminding myself daily, that hope overcame death, so that I could live constantly under it’s wings. I know I cannot do any of it myself and yet this human heart tries.
I’m learning to hope again. Learning to trust and believe that with hope in the cross, in the saving grace of Christ, I can overcome, not by my own strength, but by his.
I am learning, like my boy, to step up, to believe that when I leap, God will catch me. I am learning to hold fast to that hope because it does not disappoint.
For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. Romans 8:24-25
What does hope look like to you? Do you ever lose hope? How do you find it again?
By: Kris Camealy ~ Always Alleluia