From fifth-grade forward, Megan Tietz has been scribbling words onto any surface that would stand still. The birth of her oldest daughter seven years ago opened a fresh vein of words, and she found blogging to be a profoundly rewarding medium for sharing them. In 2006, she launched SortaCrunchy to share about her adventures in cloth diapering, babywearing, and all things natural parenting. She has been surprised, overwhelmed, comforted, and inspired by the community of friends and readers at SortaCrunchy.

Megan is the parenting and kids columnist at Simple Mom, and she often surprises even herself with the stories she tells at A Deeper Story. In April of this year, she released Spirit-Led Parenting: From Fear to Freedom in Baby’s First Year with her friend and co-author, Laura Oyer. She and her husband and two daughters happily make their home in the heart of Oklahoma City.

 

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online devotional for women

Through the years, I’ve given away and narrowed down and passed along most of our baby stuff with the idea being that I would keep only what is the most precious, the most meaningful to me from the baby season of life. Tucked away in a plastic bin, there are cards in pink envelopes from baby showers and calendars carefully noting new milestones and tiny baby shoes and, of course, the sleep journals.

Actually, sleep journal is probably far too formal of description for what you would find in that storage bin. They are actually sheets of paper with primitive grids marked out and filled in with ballpoint pen. “Went down to nap at 9:37. Slept 42 minutes. Awake 7 minutes. Had to rock back to sleep. Slept 40 more minutes.” In remarkable detail, I read in my own handwriting the obsessive notes from day after day of trying to solve my oldest daughter’s sleep “problems.”

A long-time sufferer of the exhausting pursuit of the perfect, I was determined that I would handle parenting The Right Way.

It seemed to me that the best way to learn how to do things The Right Way was to read some books. And so read I did. Lots of books. And I asked around for suggestions, and one book in particular came recommended to me highly by friends and family who had found great success in following its advice.

Before our first baby was born, I found comfort in the pages of this book. It carefully explained its common sense approach to answering the questions of caring for a baby, and I determined that The Right Way meant adhering to the book’s advice from Day One.

In the days and weeks after Dacey was born, however, the calm, warm comfort I had found in the book’s pages turned to icy fear and doubt. I seemed to be failing the program in almost every way, particularly in the realm of sleep. This is when I painstakingly created the sleep journals. This is when I spent hours googling phrases like “baby nap too short” and “four month old won’t sleep night” and “baby won’t sleep damage brain.” I was wracked with worry over the fact that my baby wouldn’t sleep the way the book said she should, and I was desperate to fix our problems.

Because at the root of my worry was a growing sense of fear. It wasn’t just about her too-short naps or not sleeping through the night by twelve weeks. It was bigger than sleep. It was a fear that if we couldn’t follow the instructions for a healthy, well-adjusted baby, it meant we would be facing nothing but stress and heartache for the rest of our parenting days. The books made it clear that if parents didn’t direct every moment of baby’s day, the end result would be an insecure, demanding child, a troubled home life, and a strained marriage.

Thanks be to God, He rescued me with His Truth. And in the way it always does, His Truth set me free. Come back tomorrow when my co-author Laura will share the antidote to the fear that threatened to choke the joy out of parenting our new babies in that first year of life.

By: Megan, SortaCrunchy

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Today, Laura and I are giving away five copies of Spirit-Led Parenting to Bloom readers! To enter to win, simply leave a comment finishing this sentence: My biggest fear about having a new baby was/is _______________. Your answer can be silly or serious. We’ll choose five commenters to win a copy of the book on Friday!

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  • Phronsie Howell

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was that if I didn’t support their head, it would fall off. I knew it wouldn’t but I couldn’t shake the mental image of my not holding them right and then they lose their head. Yeah… OR My biggest fear about having a new baby was/is puberty. Which I realize sounds weird but with each new baby, I dread the teenage years even more.

  • Ellen

    My biggest fear about having a baby was giving my baby a bath. Seriously, it is what I asked my friends about. I don’t know what got me so bent out of shape about it- probably the fear I would break my child. I wound up having a c-section and so they took a video of the first bath. The nurse didn’t treat the baby too delicatly and the baby survived, and once I saw the video I became less fearful of bathing my baby!

    • Jennifer B

      I have to second Ellen’s comment. During a Babies R’ Us baby registry trip with my husband, I, being about 6 1/2 pregnant with our first, broke down in the bathing aisle because I was sure that I wouldn’t be able to bathe our baby without hurting/dropping him! During our subsequent pregnancies, we have encountered some scares over possible complications and have suffered a loss, as well. Now, as we expect our 4th, the anxiety has changed a fair amount; I will, however, NEVER forget that cold fear that I felt regarding basic newborn care with our 1st!

    • Heidi

      My biggest fear was/still is not being able to keep my daughter from harm 100% all the time!

  • http://hisidahorose.wordpress.com Kandace

    My biggest fear about having a baby is not being able to provide him/her with a home in the country because I know that it is important for children to be “sheltered” from the bad influence that seems to pervade in the “city lifestyle.”

  • http://www.arock4him.blogspot.com Amy Hunt

    My biggest fear was that my child would have a repeat of the pains I experienced from the choices my own parents made. Fear was such a big part of the early years of child rearing and now it’s become so much less so and Trust so much more so.

    What you wrote was such beautiful worship to what God has done in your life. Truly. You will help lives to See Him and that is powerful.

  • Becky

    Being totally responsible for this new little person and that I didn’t have what it takes or know what I was doing and would ruin this sweet baby forever.

  • ~VA~

    My biggest fear about having a new baby is that it will be a rape baby or that I will somehow get pregnant from using a public bathroom…I’m serious about that…

  • http://www.joyousaccoutnt.wordpress.com Liz

    With my first, my biggest fear was that “they” would find out that I am completely incapable of raising a child and take my baby away before I could even make it out of the hospital.

  • http://ajoyrenewed.blogspot.com/ Brittnie (A Joy Renewed)

    I am living this right now. My baby is 2 months old today. I am constantly worrying about her eating, sleeping etc and wondering why in the world nothing is “going by the book.” I cannot wait to read the rest of this post.

    • http://braziers.blogspot.com Kelli

      Brittnie,

      I encourage you to stop by Megan’s blog! There’s lots of solid, REAL advice there that helped me through some pretty tough times when my daughter was an infant…and that still help today as we walk the path of toddlerhood while expecting a new baby this fall. I hope this time to give myself more grace this time around and not worry so much about going “by the book”. Blessings to you!

  • Vicki

    My biggest fear about having a new baby is the potty training years if it is a boy. Girls? Not a problem, but boys? I think they scare me a little!

  • http://www.graceglimmers.blogspot.com/ Jennifer

    My biggest fear about having a baby was that I would lose the baby or myself. My husband feared that I could die during childbirth, and he did not want to raise our son alone. God was gracious and he made our delivery smooth. Our fears were calmed, and we entered into parenting. Our fear in parenting is being what God designed us to be so that we can pass on His love to our two growing boys.

  • Theresa

    Fear of death. When i had my first child, i had just grieved the death od both parents. I am blessed to report, 29 years later, that baby will become a daddy! I will be a first time grandma in august! I would love to give this book to my son and his wife. God is amazing!

    • http://www.annaradchenko.net Anna Radchenko

      congratulations on your grandchild!! :)

    • http://www.cupofdelight.blogspot.com April

      Oh that’s so comforting..that is my biggest fear, especially since she just hit 4 months ad I keep reading most babies who die of SIDS die between ages 4-6 months. I am so freaked out sometimes.

  • Natalie

    Doing irreversible psychological damage

  • Meg schneider

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was not being all she needed. I realize now that I continued to need to be everything to everyone, leaving me exhausted and, at times, unable to enjoy my precious gift from God and relish in her.

  • Anonymous

    My biggest fear was not being present with her. Being the distracted mom. Not truly enjoying her..

  • Anonymous

    My biggest fears didn’t actualize until we brought our firstborn home. Looking back, it seems that I birthed fear the day I birthed our first baby. Nothing could have prepared me for the continuous crying and sleepless nights! My pediatrician’s standard comment was, “have a little wine, honey.” Fear on behalf of this child’s well being and survival which began at this moment, continue to visit me not only in her case, but also for our other three children. As I watch our loving Heavenly Father provide for them with His abundant grace and mercy, I am learning to rest, more and more deeply in His faithfulness and promises. This blessed child encourages me with her growing love for the Lord and her genuine longing for His Kingdom OVER the comfort and ease of a “safe” and “happy” life.
    God is the only perfect parent.

  • Cathy

    My biggest fear about having a baby was me handling the lack of sleep. I love sleep and thought I’d turn into a monster. In God’s infinite sense of humor, my first didn’t sleep through the night until almost 2. And I survived.

  • Christie

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was that they would have down syndrome. But in the last year and a half after being introduced to an amazing blog and ready some amazing stories and books I now feel left out! God’s working on me :).

    • ruth

      Oh, will you share the blog? Thanks!

  • http://www.bumblebeegrace.blogspot.com Melissa Ann

    My biggest fear was (is) not measuring up to the other moms around me. God gave me my first “baby” in a set of two for this reason. Having twins taught me that I can’t do thing the ‘right’ way. I even trained my 9 month old orally fixtated child to spit out rocks and other small items on demand b/c I knew she wouldn’t swallow them; she chewed on them like bubble gum. But I couldn’t go around pulling everything out of her mouth all the time. I had another baby to care for!

  • http://www.pausleylandadventure.blogspot.com Mandi

    Oh my! I was terrified of losing the relationship with my husband! We were married just 2ish years and were just starting to grow closer and work as a team… fears of baby taking over tormented me. :) But you know what, wouldn’t you know the Lord used our first baby to pull us even closer together!

  • http://www.blessedtreehouse.com ali

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was I CAN’T REMEMBER! 3 kids later and each day reveals new insecurities that I have in regards to parenting. I am so grateful that the Lord’s Truth does indeed set us free. His Word truly is a lamp to my feet and light for my path.

  • http://www.annaradchenko.net Anna Radchenko

    My husband and I just got married last August, and will, God-willing, have our first child within the next couple of years. My biggest fear about having a new baby is not knowing what to do, when to do it, or how to do it! Unknowns are scary for me… and I know there is a lot of unknown about taking care of a baby, toddler, child, teenager and more! Not to mention, I’m assuming each child is different and that all situations won’t be exactly the same from one to another.

  • http://aflowerforyou.blogspot.com Sarah

    My biggest fear about having a baby was that I would have to do everything myself, without help. Thankfully, I have learned that is not the case because I have an amazing and loving husband who is constantly reminding me that I just have to ask for help and I don’t have to do it all.

  • Lori

    Your post was like reading my story. I just felt like I was doing it all wrong (I think I owned the same book). My biggest fear was…and still is…failure. Failure to live up to the perfect standard I set up for myself.

  • Becky

    My biggest fear about having a baby was how to meet the needs of two tiny ones at the same time. I knew that our twins were the answer to our prayers during ten years of infertility but I was over whelmed and felt so inadequate. I learned to accept the help of a wonderful church to support us through the sleepless nights and colicky days. God provided just what we needed as we needed it as He still does. I continue to thank Him for entrusting us with the gift of two boys.

  • http://www.mymissiontolove.blogspot.com Amy Lopez

    My biggest fear of parenting a baby was just to keep them safe and healthy. Now, my first born is 13 and those baby years seem so far away, worries and fears are more substantial and i wish i would’ve worried less and enjoyed more of the baby years…

  • BRANDI SYMONIAK

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was/is failing as a parent. Not just occasionally but, always. Being too strict/not strict enough, being too compassionate/not enough, etc. I was so afraid that I just would not get it right. I am slowly learning that there is not just one right way to do things but, could really use this book!!!

  • http://charsteyn.blogspot.com/ Charissa Steyn

    My biggest fear about having a baby is wondering how in the world this little boy is gonna make it out !!! :)

  • Kendra Hotchkin

    My biggest fear was that no one else could “correctly” care for her as I did. I had to do everything and I was sure at least half I was doing wrong. Now as I hold my fourth baby napping in my arms right now I know my husband and my family are wonderful caregivers to my children as well. I am not superwoman and will never claim to be her!

  • http://belovedhopeendures.com Melinda

    I did’t want to hurt them like my parents hurt me.

  • Maranda Thompson

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was that I would always be tired and cranky and never have a restful nights’ sleep! I am not a morning person and don’t typically like to speak before 10am. Boy – has that changed! I was blessed with the sweetest, happiest baby! My husband and I race to go into his room in the morning and get him up! It’s impossible to be cranky and moody in the morning when I get to see Grant’s happy face! God is so good!

  • Danielle

    My biggest fear about having a baby is that I’m not doing it right. I, like you, have books upon books about how things “should” be. I have a 3 month old son that does not read like a textbook!

  • Melissa

    My biggest fear about parenting my new baby was her ability to feed and gain weight. She was a preemie, and the doctors were threatening hospital readmission if she did not eat and gain weight properly. I was living on pins and needles at the time. I did the same thing–just journaling all her bottles! Now it is almost funny–at 4 1/2, she’s still skinny as can be, but eats everything in sight! Beautiful girl!

  • Annie

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was/is how I can be present for the needs of all my children- my newborn, 3 yr old and 5 yr old! So want to be sure I give them each the time and love and grace they need!! Oh and that 1st trip to the grocery store w all 3 by myself… Think I feared that one a lil too much! & it wasn’t so bad after all! :)

  • Sarita

    My biggest fear was not having mom around to ask questions of. She died two days before my son was born. Soooo I too read books. Then I relied on my instincts. That son is now 28year old! Has family,job and is fine man,inspire of my parenting!

  • http://everyday-imperfections.blogspot.com/ Janelle A

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was the thought of messing her up! From not providing enough milk to laying her down incorrectly – I worried over every little thing I did being right or wrong. Now baby #2 is on the way and I’ve got a whole new set of fears!

  • http://simplysus.blogspot.com/ Susanna

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was doing everything right with the first one, not messing it up with the second one and now I’m due any day with the 3rd and my biggest fear is not balancing my time between all three!

  • Jessica

    My biggest fear about parenting revolved around my daughter’s severe GERD. She was not gaining weight and I felt so lost trying to figure out what to do and understand what all her doctors were telling me. It was all so very overwhelming and I felt like such a failure of a mother because I had this highly naive belief that as a mom, I should just KNOW how to take care of my child. But one day, after a long cry with my daughter’s pediatrician, I realized I AM a good mother and EXACTLY the mother that my child needs because God made me for her and her for me. He has guided me every step of the way, and looking back on it I can SEE Him there with me. So now, the hard times aren’t as hard as they used to be because I know I have God on my side.

  • http://helenscornerblog.blogspot.com Helen G.

    Especially with my second baby, my biggest fear was not having enough time to spend with my first son. I couldn’t imagine loving another human being like I did my first baby, so I was “nervous” about sharing my time with 2. But God is so amazing, in showing me that He Himself loves all of us THE SAME and He was going to equip me to share the same love with both of my children. And He has… I love them both equally and unconditionally. :)

  • Anne Marie

    My biggest fears was the uncontrollable. I got incredibly sick at the end of my pregnancy, and post pregnancy and then topped it off with a cancer diagnosis. All of that compiled with a non-sleeper and i had so little control. None of those things were in my control to have caused, or fixed and that lack of control was a horrible test of faith for me, one I wish i could say I conquered but looking back at how i managed the loss of a second child at 15 weeks during pregnancy and struggling to conceive this pregnancy… i know i need to trust Him so much more than my mind seems to want to allow.

  • http://www.peacebegan.com Brittany

    My biggest fear about having a baby was that I didn’t deserve him! After 3 miscarriages and our daughter’s stillbirth I was convinced that there was a reason I hadn’t been able to bring a baby in to this world alive. Once our sweet boy got here I was so worried that I didn’t deserve him. He is perfect and precious and heals us every day…he shows about God’s love and about Grace. I don’t deserve him…but that’s what Grace is about isn’t it?!

  • http://Proverbsnineteen21.wordpress.com Erika

    My biggest fear is not being around his whole life…or not being able to breadtfeed (because of sickness or injury) and him not being able to eat. These thoughts sometimes plague me, but I’m working on letting God be the one who cares for all my fears.

  • Jodi

    My biggest fear was that I wouldn’t model my christian life in the correct way!! I want my child to know the love of the Lord!!

  • http://www.tiffanynorris.com Tiffany

    My biggest fear was the lack of sleep on my part! I don’t do well without my eight hours! But God was gracious and gave me rest and support until she was sleeping through the night at six weeks (so thankful for that, too).

  • Ashley

    My biggest fear was (and still is) failure. Even though my son is now 10 months old, I still struggle every day with the possibility that I might fail him. Our biggest struggle right now is sleep. He still doesn’t sleep through the night and I have this part of me that blames myself, along with a fear that I am causing him some kind of irreparable damage. I know there is no perfect way to parent and that I am a good mom. It is just hard sometimes!

  • Ashley

    My biggest fear was that I was going to break my child. I now know that babies aren’t easily breakable. After 2 kids I still feel like my bad days will ruin them for life. I just keep praying that God will protect them and give me the energy, patience and guidance to help me raise them well.

  • http://www.lindseymbell.com Lindsey Bell

    My biggest fear was that I was somehow going to break one of my children. Literally drop them or something…

  • http://www.showerstoflowers.blogspot.com April Roland

    I worry about getting pregnant at all…if something is wrong with me….combatting the lies in my head that would tell me otherwise….and trusting in God’s good and perfect time.

  • Heather

    My biggest fear about having a baby was how will I provide for my baby and to meet all there needs and to raise them in Gods ways! I had just came to God when I had my son and I knew the only way to raise him in Gods ways was to stand and give the lord all my heart cause I knew that the only way i could b a role model and a good example to my son was with God. Only God could teach me and change me!

  • Penny

    My biggest fear about having a baby was how on earth was I to care for this little bundle and not break it—physically or emotionally! Back then I had much fear about that due to my own traumatic upbringing…..plus I didn’t then know Jesus. But, praise Him, He protected that precious little one until (and after) I became a child of God myself. Then, God used other mothers who loved Him more than life itself to “mentor” me in being a loving mom. After that all fear didn’t automatically dissolve, but God carried me through the fear, the difficult times, the questions, and everything that came with being a mother. As He parented me, I learned how to parent my little one.

  • Christy

    My biggest parenting fear before I had a child is that I would never sleep anymore. So I followed scheduling books and ended up with a failure to thrive baby and found awesome comfort in a wiser mom who was a lactation consultant. I learned to trust myself and lean on God more and books less.

    Which is why I can’t wait to read your book since number three is due in October. :)

  • Fran Johnston

    My biggest fear for parenting this little miracle that I am carrying around in me is that I don’t have what it takes to raise a child. I am also afraid that I am going to get lost in this whole process and won’t be me anymore. At 14 weeks, I have been so sick that I already don’t feel like me and I really miss me. I think I totally rocked before getting pregnant. Now I just feel like i’m waiting for the bomb to explode.

  • Carol

    My biggest fear is failure. I have a great husband, family and friends who tell me that I’m going a great job. With the Lord’s help and great support from all of them, our 8 month old son is healthy and happy!

  • http://www.thewinkofaneye.com Emily

    My biggest fear about having a new baby is being unable to measure up to the standards of being a mom that hold for myself in my head. I’m working on getting over the standards and trusting that I can’t be everything…

  • Rachel

    I guess my biggest “fear” or worry with our first baby was all the new decisions we would have to make and wanting to make informed and godly decisions that would be the best for our family. And knowing that we would not do it perfectly of course and would make lots of mistakes along the way. And as someone who is into more “natural” style parenting (which I knew wasn’t very popular with some of our friends and family) I think I was sometimes fearful of succumbing to some of the (mostly crazy) expectations some people have for families who parent more naturally/instinctively.

  • http://www.youarec13.com Erica Potter

    My biggest fear was that I would be faced with something I didn’t know how to respond to and freeze, then something serious would go wrong.

  • Caroline

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was he would ruin my marriage. I was married for seven years before the birth of my son (who’s now 4 months old). I worried that the baby would take over our life so completely that there would be no room for both of us.

  • Kimberly White

    The fear I can remember (I can’t remember much… I’m in the trenches with four kids ages 6, 5, 5 and 17months) is that someone will figure out I’m a total fraud and take them all away. Lately though I’ve been hoping someone will figure it out and come get them. Which of course has set up a new fear… I’m not enjoying mothering and my children. That I’m missing things I’ll really regret missing. That I’m just going through the motions most days. I know God calls us to live each moment and I’m failing miserably. Those fear are the ones I never thought of when pregnant with my first and then the twins (they’re on 13 mos apart). That’s been a very unexpected feeling.

  • Rachel Swarm

    My biggest fear about having a baby in a few short weeks stems from dreams I keep having about losing her or forgetting about her and then rushing around frantic looking for her in weird places like the washing machine!!

  • Elise

    My biggest fear of having a baby is just not being a good mother. Sounds vague, I know, but truly messing up a child’s life. Afraid of something happening to them or even just my tendency to be too careful that I forget to find the joy in motherhood.

  • http://www.teishknits.com Teish

    My biggest fear was (and still is) that I wouldn’t be a good enough Mom. I read everything I could and found myself reduced to tears because so many vastly different methods claimed to be the ONLY “Christian” way to parent. I wish this book had been around when I was expecting my first baby!

  • http://www.perceptionsandpassions.blogspot.com Kaitlin @ Perceptions & Passions

    Honestly…My biggest fear was/is being like my mom was.

  • lindsey bird

    My biggest fear about having a baby was (and still often is) just knowing that I was bringing them into a broken, fallen world and that the sin of this world would end up hurting them at some point. I struggle so much with wanting to protect them from it, when I know it’s simply not in my hands. Nevertheless, the battle still wages within my heart — this not wanting to let go of them yet knowing that there is no better, safer, more loving place than in the Father’s hands.

  • http://livingundone.com Steph

    One of my biggest fears was being able to parent through exhaustion.

  • http://joyinmykitchen.blogspot.com SnoWhite @ Finding Joy in My Kitchen

    I worry about pregnancy…. the battle there wages strong.

  • http://www.kristinewman.blogspot.com Kristi at My Cup Runs Over

    My biggest fear with my first was SIDS and breastfeeding. I bought one of those monitors for sick or preemie babies that tell you when they stop breathing. I was taught that you let babies cry themselves to sleep, and never let them sleep in your bed. But, I was so exhausted, and so scared, that I would sleep rigidly on my back, baby on my chest so I could feel her breathe, and that was the only way she would sleep. Eventually, I worked out my own thing, and by baby #5, I’ve now comfortably co-slept with all of them and remember those fear-filled days with sadness.

    What a great book idea! I’m always struggling as a parent to push my fear aside and just “be.” Fear is a huge part of parenting in our culture. It serves a purpose – to keep us aware of danger, we can no longer let our 8-yr olds run off to the park alone. That makes it so hard to balance the good effects of fear against the bad.

  • Andrea

    My biggest fear was that I wouldn’t love my child. I was not sure that I wanted to be a mom and afraid that I would want to quit completely (not just at the end of a frustrating day) some time after my daughter was born.

  • http://christinahomemaker.blogspot.com/ christina

    Right now (with baby #4 on the way–to arrive only 16 months after his/her big sister joined our family) my biggest fear is how I’m going to manage having two little ones so close together plus the two older ones. How on earth am I going to give them all everything they’ll need?

  • http://dearbabyowen.blogspot.com Emily Kongs

    I wouldn’t be as good of a Mother as my Mom was to me!

  • Heidi

    My biggest fear was that parenting would get too stressful and my husband and I would get a divorce. My parents divorced and it was very difficult.

  • Katherine

    My biggest fear was leaving the baby in my husband’s more “free-spirited” (ahem… haphazard) care while I took a shower, got a haircut, etc. :)

  • http://www.joyunbundled.blogspot.com Amy

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was losing him. I lost my first son when he was three days old and now I have a three month old son. The first few weeks were incredibly difficult and I still get scared at night. The Lord is so good to faithfully comfort and fill us with His encouragement. Praise be to God!

  • Janell

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was NOT having a new baby. For several long years my husband and I walked along the painful road of infertility and I began to question why God had given me the dream of motherhood. Now I know. Next week we continue to celebrate the miracle of adoption as our beautiful son turns one!

  • Jess S

    My biggest fear was/is making some of the same mistakes that my parents made that caused some deep hurts for me and my siblings. I’ve come to realize, though, that despite those “mistakes” the four of us are all well-adjusted adults with relatively good relationships with our parents and that part of being a parent is about being human and just asking for lots of grace and forgiveness along the way. :-)

  • Amy

    Mine is that she’ll stop breathing again. Thankful that she started again and is doing well today.

  • http://braziers.blogspot.com Kelli

    My biggest fear about having a baby (this time around…baby #2) is that I won’t be able to give as much time and attention to the new baby as I did his big sister when she was a newborn (and every day since!). It’s a daunting thought to be ‘everything’ to not only one little life, but two!

  • Rachel

    I’m not ready. I found out two days ago that I’m pregnant… and my husband and I are just surprised. Excited. Sort of. Scared. Definitely. This was not our timing, or our plan. Trying to rest in His timing and His plan.

  • http://www.bringingyoumorethanasong.blogspot.com Jessica Mumford

    …..attachment. We are adopting sibling infants from Ethiopia, and I fear their losses and the potential to make attachment difficult. I would love to read this book to learn how to be led by God in parenting!

  • http://sarahoutloud.com Sarah P.

    My biggest fear about having a baby is handling those very young days when they seem so delicate!

  • http://simplystriving.wordpress.com/ Nikki

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was that he would be born with all my bad attributes and my hubby’s bad attributes and have to suffer through our failures. Oh, but I’m so glad to share He has freed me from that fear. For we are all made precious in His sight. He makes the dust we are born in beautiful. And He loves us all just as we are. For we are all hopelessly flawed and hopelessly forgiven…

  • http://Thereinercasaplusone.blogspot.com Erika

    As a first time parent, my biggest fear is our son hurting or not understanding how he was born in our hearts and not my belly. My other biggest fear is not living up to all our birth mom dreams for him. We cherish his birth mother and her selfless gift to us. On the other hand, God is in control so why should I be afraid? I need to let go and let God.

  • http://Thereinercasaplusone.blogspot.com Erika

    One more thought: THANK YOU for asking moms to post their biggest fears. THANK YOU MOMS for sharing! I have some of the same fears too (bath time and him slipping out of my hands from bath to towel, SIDS, attachment, etc). We are all normal!!!

    THANKS FOR SHARING

  • Megan

    My biggest fear was just being overwhelmed knowing that as soon as I was a mother I would never have a break. The constant-ness was pretty scary.

  • Megan

    My biggest fear was just being overwhelmed knowing that as soon as I was a mother I would never have a break. The constantness was pretty scary.

  • Melissa

    My biggest fear was that my daughter wasn’t getting enough to eat. I breastfed (and still am breastfeeding) and was so afraid I wasn’t making enough milk for my baby girl. Of course God is providing the perfect amount of milk for my daughter and she is growing perfectly. I was also afraid for the first couple of months that she would just quit breathing while sleeping. God reaches us in those dark moments, though, and He reminded me that my daughter is His child and he is caring for her always.

  • Carmen

    My biggest fears were not having enough patience, not having enough energy (I’m an older mom) and not being a good mother.

  • http://www.thewalkerramble.com amy

    Fear of losing them!

  • Tyra

    My biggest fear about having a new baby is sleep deprivation leading to short temperedness with my other children.

  • Heidi

    Fear that I can’t keep her 100% safe all the time. Definitely learning to trust her to my Heavenly Father!

  • http://www.everafterblueprint.com Andrea

    We’re expecting our first baby in October and I am a very type A person. My fear is that I will smother the baby with expectations and not let him be himself.

  • http://madesacred.blogspot.com Elizabeth

    Oh, oh, OH!!! I would love so incredibly much to read this book! My biggest fear was AND is that I will somehow screw up my child by what I do or don’t do for them.

  • Genevieve

    My biggest fear with having a new baby was that I would respond to my baby as I’d seen others respond; that eventually, I’d give in and be just like everyone else. Hardly anyone I knew parented the way I felt in my heart was right and I was scared that maybe they were like me…they had good intentions in the start, but went on to baby training. I’m going onto baby #2 now, and my biggest fear now is the typical “How will I respond to BOTH of my babies if they need me simultaneously? How will I keep my cool?” :)

  • http://evanandjeannie.org Jeannie Pederson

    My biggest fear about having a baby? That I wouldn’t measure up. I, too, read books and articles and talked to experienced moms. I knew things wouldn’t go textbook-perfectly, but I was terrified that I wouldn’t be able to be a perfect mom and wife. I didn’t care so much about the house, but I wanted my husband and baby to have as much of “me” as they possibly needed, and to have all their needs met perfectly and immediately. Doesn’t happen. I try so hard, and fall so short. I’m learning that God’s grace fills the gaps!

    I would truly love to read this book, and I have so many friends who are always asking for recommendations. In fact, I’d love to do a review on my blog (and link it to ylcf.org, which I write for, as well as a Facebook group of over 300 young moms).

  • http://hissongtomeshalom.blogspot.com Mandy

    My big fear: that she would suddenly stop breathing. She’s 10, and I still check to make sure she is before I go to bed!

  • http://www.arearrangedlife.com Miriam @ a Rearranged Life

    When I read the question I laughed (a strange laugh that I’m not so sure about). I even felt jittery. Weird, I know.

    I didn’t have time to fear much beyond labor and delivery, and we made it safely through. …but 9 days in fear took hold of every ounce of my being and I heard whispers of brain damage in the ER. My precious Lord, in His infinite wisdom has been rearranging me ever since.

    Now I realize that when it comes to parenting and my children, my greatest fear should be that we loose perspective…focusing on anything other than him and eternity.

    It’s a daily struggle, to not have my hope be in whether my child can call my name or walk or hear me say I love him. I hurt and I hurt deep. And, when it comes to fear – I’m completely human.

    I fear things all the time. I’m aware of worst-case scenario pretty much 24 x 7, and I fear it. I don’t take it for granted that my children will wake up tomorrow, and that’s both hard and beautiful, because it means that I take residence in “the Shelter of His Wing.” But the pain and uncertainty…it doesn’t mean that my God has abandoned me. He holds my hand that much tighter in the pain, and I cling to Isaiah 43. In my fears – in the fire, in the flood – he whispers ” Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.” This is where I need to be.

    When it comes to calculated fears/desires (I prefer to word it in the positive) I desire most that my husband, my children and I stand in this place and hold his hand forever.

    “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” -Mark 9:24

    Looking forward to the post tomorrow!

  • http://akficzner@gmail.com KatieF

    My biggest fear about having a baby is getting caught up in the “baby world” and not putting God first and my husband second!

  • Christie

    My biggest fear. Losing her.

  • Katie

    My biggest fear is that I’ll somehow do something to permantly damage them. I realize this is silly and mostly out of my hands, but it still is there. Praying and trusting helps though :)

  • http://www.katewriteslife.com Kate

    My daughter is now 30 and with a 6-month-old of her own, and immediately after I comment, I’m forwarding this post to her.
    I’d had miscarriages before I had her, and our church literally prayed her to term, but my biggest fear after she was born was, “What on earth do I do with/for her all day long to keep her happy?” This was more stressful as she got older: Am I reading/singing to her enough/too much? Am I holding her enough/too much? Is she eating the right things enough/too much? And I prayed like crazy! :>)

  • http://www.dayspring.com Martha McNeal

    My greatest fear was that I wouldn’t be enough to meet his needs…hugely leaning on the everlasting arms of our Lord and savior who is forever faithful, thanks be to God!

  • Carly

    Thanks for the giveaway! My biggest fear about having a new baby was SIDS.

  • Brittany

    My biggest fear when I was expecting our first child was that something would go wrong during labor/the birth. I am so grateful God blessed me with a perfect birth at home!

  • Heather

    I have two.
    My biggest fears about having a new baby are his health (I am currently expecting after losing a daughter), and still being a good mother to my oldest while caring for a newborn.

  • AmyC

    My biggest fear was knowing what to do with a 9 month old, which was the age of our son when we adopted him. I was scared to death that I wouldn’t know how to take care of him and that he wouldn’t attach to me. He’s now 2,been home for 15 months, and I did figure out how to take care of him and he is completely attached to me…totally a mama’s boy!!

  • Lindsey L

    My biggest fear about having a new baby (due this month!) is not handling challenges with patience and peace, but with hormonal emotions and tears! With my first baby I had horrible post partum, but this time I’m praying to be soaked in His peace and not be so critical of myself.

  • Erin

    My biggest fear with our upcoming pregnancy is that it’s TWINS and I’m afraid of how to divide my time between them and my toddler daughter. I desperately don’t want her to feel like she’s getting the shaft!

  • http://dianewbailey.com/ Diane Bailey

    When I was pregnant, my biggest fear was that when the baby came, I would forget that I had a baby and go off and leave it at home alone. I laugh at myself now, but when my son was first born, I left notes on the doors to remind myself. “do you have diaper bag, purse and baby?”

  • http://www.girlwithblog.com anna {girlwithblog}

    My biggest fear in having a new baby was… Will I be enough for them? Will I know what I’m doing, will I be able to love them enough? And so far, God has given be enough for my little Sammy boy =)

  • http://www.expectinghope.com/ Suzanne

    That I would do it all very, very wrong. Actually, still my fear with all of my children, frankly….

  • Jenny

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was that I would be too harsh with her. Somehow in my hurry to “do all the right things” to care for her, I found myself not taking the time to be gentle. :( This was also the most horrifying thing to realize. That in my fight to “get it all done, perfectly” I was actually doing more harm than good. BUT in His faithfulness, Jesus has helped me through this!

  • YKP

    My biggest fear was my own inadequacy and imperfection as a mom, knowing that I would be the most influential person in her life.

  • http://theautomomma.blogspot.com Sarah

    My biggest fear about having a new baby is losing her, either by making some catastrophic mistake or simply losing her a bit at a time by terrible parenting. My biggest fear when I had my son was doing something wrong. I guess we all worry about those little things piling atop each other to destroy our kids. Things that may seem insignificant but when we think of all of our other perceived shortcoming multiply tenfold.

  • Kim

    My biggest fear is that this child is different than my other children. In my mind I worry about how I will raise her to be a Godly, modest woman in our present culture. I think way to much about how she is going to turn out. My biggest prayer right now is for God to help me focus on one day at a time. For God to help me see and meet the needs of today in her life. She is definitly different everyday. She does not fit into the same mold everyday. :)

  • Sara

    My biggest fears are the things that are out of my control – SIDS, high fevers, etc.

  • http://karenisbell.wordpress.com Karen

    My biggest fear about having a child was that I would drop them when they spit up on me. I don’t do bodily fluids at. all. Thankfully, the first and only time I was spit up on, I did not drop her, however, I rebuked the spit-up and it has not returned since :)

  • http://www.playeatgrow.com Tiffany

    While pregnant, my biggest fear was that I wouldn’t love this baby. I mean, I didn’t even know the kid– what if my motherly instinct didn’t kick in?

    As soon as I birthed the baby, my biggest fear was no longer that, but was that I wouldn’t know what to do! I had never even babysat! I remember walking out of the hospital thinking, “you mean, you’re just gonna send this baby home with me?!”

  • Jordan Davis

    My biggest fear was SIDS. I would constantly go into his room while he was sleeping to make sure he was breathing. I still do it and he is 19 months.

  • http://samann1121.blogspot.com Jessie

    My biggest fear was that umbilical cord stump! Seriously. I was so afraid that it was going to get terribly infected, but at the same time it was so gross and I didn’t even want to look at it. My wonderful husband took care of it. :-)

  • http://www.ourlittlehomeschoolcottage.com/ Niki S.

    This is crazy but I worried my mother in law (who wasn’t my mother in law yet technically until after my daughter was born) was going to take my daughter from me because she was in the process of trying to get custody of her grandsons from her step daughter (who was on drugs at the time). So I was really paranoid she was going to take them because she was so “do this, do this this way”. I have a good mother in law and love her dearly now, but I was young and scared about that. My daughter is now 15 and my other daughter is 12. My mother in law never tried to take them from me LOL! Though if my daughters ever got made at me when they were really little, they would pack their over night bag and say they were moving in with their Mamal Debbie. So cute.

  • Deanna

    My biggest fear was messing up – not being a good parent, fear of the unknown, not being sure what to do.

  • LaDonna

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was that she might not like me. Then what? I was truly a nervous mommy without much baby experience. She’s now 24 and we share many of the same interests so time together is usually pretty enjoyable!

  • Genevieve

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was that he would quit breathing or die.
    A lighthearted addition to this fear: When I told the nurse I was afraid he couldn’t breathe while he was nursing. She replied “Oh he is fine, he has two special little holes to breathe out of.” I thought he did, that babies came with some sort of special breathing apparatus on their noses. I kept looking for those little holes and much much later realized she meant his nostrils…..or did she.
    Ha! He is now a healthy, wonderfully Saved 7 year old.
    Note: He did have severe bouts with asthma as a 4 year old and came close to death twice.

    Blessings*

  • Christen

    I think what I’m most nervous about in having baby #1 at age 42 is upsetting the dynamic in my family of origin. I fear having to set more boundaries at this stage, but I see the need on the horizon.

  • jenny l.

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was nursing. And while it turned out to be quite the fiasco, now after baby #4, I seem to have it down pat. I think a lot of the problem was way too much information – had I just listened to my own body and followed my instincts, I would have been much better off in the long run. Instead of it being the beautiful bonding experience, it became my worst fear and the toughest six months of my life with a little. But, ultimately, I think most mothers experience some sort of fear in every part of raising littles – giving it to God and trusting in his divine providence is the only way to go!!

  • Kate S.

    my biggest fear about having a new baby was that i would forget to live in the moment. that i would get too ahead of myself of what was to come… crawling, talking, walking… or get caught up in the past, how tiny she was, her little quirks she would do then, instead of the amazing things she is doing now… like chewing on her book! :)

  • Kirsten

    My biggest fear was that I wouldn’t be able to balance my time between a baby, my marriage and everything else in my life.

  • Stacey

    My biggest fear is being and having to do everything myself. We just found out a few days ago that we are having twins. We live in Kansas and all of my family is in Minnesota.
    I’m so scared to be alone with 2 babies.

  • Mary M

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was wondering if I was doing everything just “right”. I didn’t want this wee one to be messed up for life. I wanted him to “fit in” and to be liked. I wanted other people to look at me and think I had it all together…
    … Sad but true.

    That was 27 years ago, and my baby is expecting his first baby in August. He turned out pretty well despite having me for a mother. I would love to share your book with him and my daughter-in-love.

  • http://theprenevosts.blogspot.com Emilee

    My biggest fear about having a baby was that something would be wrong with her and I wouldn’t know how or wouldnt be able to fix it….I’ve since learned and accepted that she is God’s girl and He can and will take care of her far better than I ever will be able to!!!

  • http://www.mycmsite.com/carollindberg Carol Lindberg

    My biggest fear was having to leave him & sending him to daycare & I wanted to avoid that as long as possible (even though he was going to our church, I knew the Director & all of the teachers & happy kids (& their parents( who had gone there. So I worked out this crazy convoluted schedule including my husband & I working half days some times, my parents coming several times (even though they were busy running their restaurant), my husband’s grown daughter watching him a few days . . . So I delayed his going by perhaps 6 to 8 weeks. With hindsight, my now rising third grader would have been perfectly fine if he had started a few months earlier. But that felt right at the time.

  • Laressa

    My biggest fear was how in the world I was going to get her out! I didn’t look too far ahead past that, which actually turned out pretty well for those early days of worrying if I was doing things right- I had to trusst my instincts!

  • Jacki

    My biggest fear with my first baby was SIDS. I literally never slept the first three days once we got home from the hospital, as I wouldn’t take my eyes off of my bundle of joy that caused me severe anxiety and panic attacks. I was so afraid of failing my daughter, my husband, myself, God, and anyone else who knew me. Probably sensing my fears, my daughter was an extremely fussy and unsettled baby. That was 7 years ago. After two miscarriages and a lot of prayers, I am so thankful that God gave me another shot at caring for an infant. Our second daughter is 5 months old. This time is so much easier and my sanity is very intact (having a baby with an easy temperament is a breath of fresh air). My Redeemer redeemed me as a mother. Thanks be to God!

  • Jacki

    My biggest fear with my first baby was SIDS. I didn’t sleep the first 3 days once we got home from the hospital, as I wouldn’t take my eyes off of my bundle of joy that caused me severe anxiety. I was so afraid of failing my daughter, my husband, God, and anyone else who knew me. Probably sensing my fears, my daughter was an extremely fussy and unsettled baby. That was 7 years ago. After two miscarriages and a lot of prayers, I am so thankful that God gave me another shot at caring for an infant. Our second daughter is 5 months old. This time is so much easier and my sanity is very intact (having a baby with an easy temperament is a breath of fresh air). My Redeemer redeemed me as a mother. Thanks be to God!

  • Annette

    My biggest fear in being a new mom was not being a new mother. I was told before my husband and I were married by my doctor that I would not be able to have children because of severe endometriosis. Well, 28 years and 5 children later, I praise God every day for my children. {OK some days I question that the Lord thought I could do this} but He guides me through. And, our oldest and her husband just gave us our first grandchild. God is Good.

  • Tami

    Oh my goodness, I did the same thing with my first son. He was colicky and didn’t sleep. Ever! I was so hard on myself and read everything and tried everything. When I became pregnant with my second, many, including myself, prayed diligently that he would be a good sleeper. God answered our prayers in mighty ways!
    But I think what I was most scared about before I had kids, and still am, is that I will be a different parent than who my parents were. I wasn’t raised in a God-centered home and my dad & stepmom were less than emotionally involved. I want to be better than that!

  • Jennyroo

    I was always afraid that I would forget who I was in the process of raising this new creation!

  • Christine

    I was horrified of giving my baby his first bath. He was literally two weeks old. I thought the slippery, soaped up babe would slip through my hands and drown in his baby bath with 1/4″ of water in it. :-) I’m happy to say he made it just fine through his first bath and many more after that. I on the other end was a mental wreck after that first bath… :-)

  • http://www.rachelanelson.blogspot.com rachieannie

    My biggest fear was that I wouldn’t like being a mom. I really struggled with not wanting to lose myself (which I fear I have, and still struggle with … ), and being really overwhelmed with what it was going to be like to be a mom. I spent a lot of my first pregnancy wondering if it was all worth it. At least that’s a worry I don’t have with my second pregnancy, because I found that it is worth it. All of it.

  • Ashley

    My biggest fear is losing my cool and becoming the “checked out mom”. You know, that mom who lets her kids run rampant because she is too exhausted to care.

  • http://letterstolila.wordpress.com Latricia

    My biggest fear about having a baby was that her Down Syndrome meant our lives would never be “perfect.” In the last 6 months, I’ve learned that no one ever finds perfection, but sometimes you discover something better on life’s unexpected journeys.

  • Marie

    My biggest fear about having a new baby years ago, what the I would forget to feed him! I always remembered though, and it turned out that I had the age-old instinct to care for that new baby. It was a delight to learn something new about myself in those first week and months and he faired just fine.

  • Courtney R

    My biggest fear is that somehow I will screw up my children as much (or worse) as my parents did me.

  • Ashley Johnson

    I have so many fears…some are starting to calm a little as I enter her third month. My fears included not nurturing her enough. the fear of not being able to give her all she needs emotionally, developmentally, physically, etc. I had the fear of becoming depressed from the lack of sleep and energy draining days and nights. The fear of losing my husband to someone or something else because so much of my time and affection is taken by baby. the fear of not being able to see or even have my friends anymore. The fear of losing myself, my identity as I once new it. The fear of me not teaching her enough and her not “knowing” her Creator. the fear of not having enough money to live day to day and pay all the bills that keep coming and coming…need I go on? Some of my fears are dwindling in sight of the big picture but some are still so strong.

  • rjb

    …that I wouldn’t realize when she needed something – which would mean she ended up seriously hurt or even killed.
    (anyone else having trouble posting comments from the app?)

  • Julie

    My biggest fear was how all my mistakes would affect my sweet babies, and whether or not God would/could redeem those mistakes in their lives.

  • Bethany

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was failing. As a mom, as a wife, as a daughter, just failing. That somehow failing to be what they needed me to be would result in a less than perfect child. Laughing at myself now, (4 kiddos later and the 4th being a sweet baby) and realizing that they are not EVER going to be perfect and that is not what I want them to be anyway. I just Praise the Lord for His constant grace and that He is working in them, and it is not based on what I do wrong or right, it is just based on His grace that is sufficent even through my weakness.

  • http://rediscoveringdomesticity.com Audra

    With my first, I feared everything. He was 4 weeks early and so tiny. We had just moved across the country 4 weeks before he came. My support system was down to just mom, dad, and hubby. PPD quickly set in. I would hover over the crib and watch him sleep to make sure he didn’t die from SIDS. I would pump endless hours to try to get as much breastmilk in him I could despite poor supply from undiagnosed thyroid issues. I was a MESS. With my second, I feared it would all happen again. With my third, I have been much more even-keeled and relying on God. I haven’t really had a choice – I had all three in 4 years!

  • Elizabeth Valdivia

    My biggest fear was that the diagnosis that the doctors gave would turn out to be correct. While pregnant, they found something wrong with my little baby girl’s heart. Doctor said that she would need surgery 2-3days after she was born and then would need surgeries throughout her life. My husband and I prayed and believed that this would not be the case. The doctors kept saying the same thing; there were also other things that they found, so negativity was coming at me every angle. Veronica Joy is our first baby, and I am happy to say, has not had heart surgery. She is a little over three months now and healthy. We did have to spent the first 17 days of her little live in the hospital, but that is another long story. :)
    Glory be to the faithful God we serve.

  • Jessi

    My biggest fear is not being able to protect them forever. This world can be so evil sometimes and that scares me. I just hope I can be half the mom my mom was. I also have a fear I won’t live to see them grow up. My mom passed away from cancer at 48.

  • Jessi

    My biggest fear is not being able to protect them forever. This world can be so evil sometimes and that scares me. I just hope I can be half the mom my mom was. I also have a fear I won’t live to see them grow up.

  • http://momfessions.net Sheila@Momfessions

    My biggest fear about having a baby was… how my life would change! I didn’t know what to expect… or what that little human would expect from me! ;) Five years later, it’s working out pretty well. Not perfect, but life doesn’t have to be perfect to be wonderful. Amen?

  • Robin Troxell

    my biggest fear about having a new baby was that I would totally screw her up. Oh and that having a baby would wreck my marriage.

  • http://familyfaithcompanion.org Carol H.

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was that I would do something “wrong.”

  • K

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was failure- on a million levels. That she’d be the one whose life would be ruined for my mistakes.

  • K

    My biggest fear about having a new baby was not having anyone to ask for advice. I’d lost my mom and grandma, and felt utterly unprepared or equipped, and without resources for navigating the big and little challenges of motherhood. So I learned to rely on Christ.

  • http://www.cupofdelight.blogspot.com April

    My biggest fear is that I will lose my baby-I keep hearing all these horror stories of little babies dying and I know I am completely out of control. The problem is, I am also having trouble trusting that the God Who is. I fear He really isn’t good and that because I’ve been very blessed thus far, something horrible is going to happen because I need to suffer.

    • Elizabeth Valdivia

      April, if I may, allow me to minister into your life.
      Remember that the Lord has not given us the spirit of fear, ( 2 Tim 1:7) so we know the fear you are experiencing is from the enemy. Read Phil 4:6-7 It tells us not to worry, but to bring it all to the Lord in prayer. The Bible also says that God does not tempt us or sent troubles or heartache our way so we can suffer ( James 1:13, Ps. 52:9, Psalm 84:11, 3 John 1:2). But when hardships do come our way, He promises to be with us ( Josh 1:5, Romans 8:28). All the fears you have and the doubts are from the devil. I encourage you to read the scriptures above and resist the enemy! James 4:7 says that if we resist the enemy he will flee from us!
      You will be in my prayers, and please email me if you need anything. I pray that you are encouraged and strengthened by everything I have written! I also have a testimony that I would love to share with you, my own experience of wondering if the Lord really was good…

  • Felicity

    My biggest fear is that I will not be vigilent enough and my baby will come to harm.

  • Jennie

    My biggest fear about having a baby was that I wouldn’t get enough sleep. No one told me newborns didn’t sleep through the night and I loved my sleep. I have 3 children and they slept with my husband and I and then together. Our theory was as long as everyone is sleeping who cares where they are. They did eventually sleep through the night in their own beds are are now in their twenties, starting their own families.

  • http://onetechmom.wordpress.com Megan Plunkett

    My biggest fear of becoming a mom was ‘messing him up.’ Thankfully, after lots of prayer and support from my husband and family, I realized that I am exactly the mom God wants me to be. I am constantly praying that I will be a Godly example to my son (soon to be two sons!). He takes care of all my fears and worries.

  • Lyndi

    My biggest fear about having a baby is being so young (in everyone else’s eyes). I am in my early 20s and married. People already say I am crazy for getting married so young, let along having a child so early. My husband and I know it’s the Lord’s will. It is very discouraging and scary though when others think you aren’t equipped enough and almost expect you to fail. It makes me second guess God, which is a dangerous place to be. He is my Lord, not everyone else!