I walk through my house, thoughts swirling through my mind like the dust bunnies doing dances in front of my vacuum.
I think of other women who have cleaner houses.
Which leads to thoughts of other women who cook better meals.
And that goes on to other women who have cuter outfits, and are better at twitter, and can make small talk with ease.
I wish I could be like…is the refrain that goes round and round in my mind.
Finally I hit the power button on the vacuum, feeling drained myself.
I whisper a question, “God, why do I feel I need to be like so many other people?”
It seems there is an answer that comes so quiet…
Because the enemy would rather have you be like anyone but Jesus.
As we used to say in Junior High, um, duh.
If I’m busy trying to be like Mary, Martha and Margaret then I’m left with no time to be me. Or, more specifically, to let Jesus be who He is through me.
Each of us are made in the image of God. That means we’re created to show Him to the world in a way no one else ever has and no one else ever will.
I do that by being who He made me.
And you do that by being you.
So listen, brave friends, let’s decide together that we will stop trying to be like each other.
And instead be conformed to the one whose likeness we’re made in.
I empty the vaccum into a bag, dust and clutter giving way to clean again. I smile because my heart suddenly feels like that too.
Comparison replaced by clarity–about who I am, what I’m called to do, and the God who’s wild enough to choose me for His purposes.
And you.
And you.
And you.
All of us.
Just as we are–and unlike anyone else.
– Holley Gerth, author of You’re Already Amazing
ABOUT HOLLEY GERTH
Holley Gerth is a cofounder of (in)courage and Squee!, the best-selling author of You're Already Amazing, life coach, wife to Mark, follower of Jesus, and friend to YOU. She'd love to have coffee...
{ 95 comments… read them below or add one }
This is so true!!! Thank you for listening to God and sharing- Well Said!!! :) I am so encouraged by this you have no idea.
Oh my….thank you for this one today, that’s me! Trying to be but never making it. Only thru Him can I be the me He wants me to be. Thank you, thank you!!!!!
:)
Thanks for this – just what i needed to hear this am!
We ALL do it, but when you think about it, what a sad way to think about ourselves. When we long to be like someone else we are telling God He didn’t a good enough job. I think that if I can just trust that He made me ME for a purpose, then I’ll see Him showing through in ways I never imagined. Let’s try ladies!
Thank you Holley. I so needed to read this today because I am feeling everyone else is better or more significant, worth while than me today. I needed to be reminded that God made me the way I am and that I am okay. Now to get my heart to agree.
I have always told my daughters we have strengths and weaknesses and we are not all created equal and if we were it would be a boring place and we would be all the same. Also note: what you lack someone around is has that as a strength. So they are there for a reason. Sometimes we can also learn from them.
So glad you’re sharing with your daughters too!
“So listen, brave friends, let’s decide together that we will stop trying to be like each other.
And instead be conformed to the one whose likeness we’re made in.”
Yes. And thank you.
How encouraging! I always try to keep this in mind, especially when tempted to compare myself with others. After all, I want my unique lifesong to sing to Him!
Love this:
“God, why do I feel I need to be like so many other people?”
It seems there is an answer that comes so quiet…
Because the enemy would rather have you be like anyone but Jesus.
Wow. What a truth.
Watching the Olympics this week definitely brings out the comparison mode in me, not in athletics, but just wishing I was better at things, but knowing deep in my heart, I am doing the best I know to do with what God has given me.
Amen. Your comment left me nodding my head in agreement. And like Holley … when I finished the hoovering and emptied the bag (all the while the Olympics playing on the TV) I felt better.
Good Morning Holley,
I so enjoy all your encouraging post, I always have something new to learn,and thanks so much for the way you present the gospel!!! Have a simply beautiful day!!!
God Bless,
Sheila
Thanks, Holley! Always good. :)
Thank you so much. I needed to read this today! (And you also reminded me that I need to put vaccum bags on my shopping list! :))
love it! this touches so many of “us” as women.
thanks for uplifting me today!
Holley,
Thank you for this truth. It is a great encouragement to remember that we are not called to be the same as those we admire. We aren’t asked anyone other than who God made us to be.
Have a great Friday! =)
How beautiful! Holley, you are such a server…. passing out His love with such grace!
As I read this article I remembered what was told to me many years ago. Imagine you are at school in Phys. Ed. class. Jesus and Satan are on either side ready to choose teams. Jesus says, “Who wants to be on My team?” I quickly, raise my hand and say, “I do!” He then, smiles, and says, “I choose you!” Today as I think about this powerful, tender Truth of “He chose me!”, how can I ever feel inferior!
Father, give me the opportunity today, to remind Your precious ones, that You chose them!
Needing this today. Closing my eyes and breathing it in. The truth of who I am–that I am loved. I am a favorite. Not everyone else as it sometimes feels…but me too. Just me. Thank you, Holley.
Thankyou…….just one word…..but behind it and within it comes my breath as I send it on wings of appreciation for your ability to write and communicate ……with us….with Him……so uncomplicated……no jargon to decipher……..be yourself……be me…..and I let you friend be you……..it sounds so simple…….unwrapped in all it’s glory…….to be like Jesus……..to be an expression of him living through little old me……I am only just learning about who I am with him……so here it comes again as I breathe out……thankyou
How did you know that is what I was thinking! Thank you!! :)
Thank you for this post today. After asking why do I do that… I also have to then ask myself… why isn’t affirmation from Jesus enough? Why do we want clothes like this one, or a home like that one, or to be a speaker, writer, mama, christian…. the list goes on.
I know it is natural… but somewhere along the way, in everyone’s life…. there is a mirror moment. We have to face ourselves and what this unending ‘wanting’ has caused us to be. I believe then, that we will be awakened to only want His approval, His likeness and His will for our lives, no matter what the end result looks like.
God Bless You Holley. Your writing has been brighter, happier and overall much more ‘alive’ lately! It has always been excellent but lately… it has been more alive is the only way I can describe it as a reader. Anyway… I am gleaning from your posts and books and can’t wait till the next book comes out.
Amen. I used to think that I wanted to have {these characteristics} of my mom and {those characteristics} of my mother-in-law, and that would make me the ideal homemaker. I gave up on that because it was impossible, but I like your reasoning better than my own. You’re so right.
I REALLY needed to hear that today Holley, thank you!! God is SO good : )
I like what you said that we are made in God’s image so we’ll show people a unique view of who He is. I’m learning to be me, finding out who me is. But I don’t like a proud me. I want to be humble. Jesus humbled Himself pretty often.
Loved this and needed to hear it again today and every day! Thanks so much!
4 years ago, I quit coloring my silver strands in my dark brown hair,
for this reason. Between Yahshua and my husband, I was convinced
that I was truly beautiful with the non-chemical colors that Yahweh
Himself put in my aging beautiful-no-matter-what-age hair! Today,
I read your fine message and smiled, again, and said, “Father, help
me to see once again today, that I AM YOUR DAUGHTER!” The war
in my mind never stops, and daily I must remind myself of
Galatians 2:20. (Not that hair dying is a sin to me, don’t get me wrong.
But I struggled with silver colored strands for 5 years….it took over
in my mind.) Thanks for listening, Holley, and thanks for today’s
message.
1 Samuel 16:7
=============
“But the LORD said to Samuel,
“Do not consider his appearance or his height,
for I have rejected him.
The LORD does not look at the things people look at.
People look at the outward appearance,
but the LORD looks at the heart.””
+
Beautiful! It is so easy to focus on other’s strengths and want to aspire to be just like them. And while it’s good to have encouraging women in our lives, we can’t lose site of who God designed us to be. Thank you for your honest words, as I know I’ve been there myself. Striving to be content with who God made me as an individual, and praying the same for those around me. <3
Anytime I feel less than others around me, I immediately think about Psalm 139:14-16 where David says, “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depth of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” Each one of us are uniquely formed and known by God. How can I desire to be anyone else when He made me to reflect His glory.
Thanks for your great comments and reminder of how we are His person to express His glory.
This is me completely – all my life I’ve wanted to look better, have a better house, cook better – to be someone other than me – I’m getting older and just hate my wrinkles, but guess that is who I am. I enjoy your writings and you hit it completely today. God Bless
Found a joke in the internet that I slightly altered. I’m sure you would like this:
Q. Why can’t scientists find a cure for AIDS?
A. Laboratory mice know their gender and cannot be forced into homosexuality.
Oh I thought it was just me who felt this way :). Thanks for putting so pragmatically into words the shortcomings of comparison. Comparison is truly the thief of joy! Thanks for the loving reminder Holley :)
Holley, thank you very much for this message. It’s a hard thing to change the pattern of comparisons but a much needed change for me! I want to grow to the place I “only have eyes” for Jesus!!! You again, have been a needed encourager! Blessings…
Oh Holley, how much we all need to hear this! In our world, it seems like we are always being told (either directly or indirectly) that we have to compete with everyone else, that if I win you lose and vice versa, that there isn’t really enough love/value/acceptance to go around. How important to affirm that there is a unique place for every single person, and that each of us is put here by God for a special purpose that no one else can fulfil. This sets me free to rejoice in the gifts of others, instead of feeling envious or apprehensive, because I know that I too have gifts that nobody else has. We are all parts of the body of Christ, and each of us is uniquely valued. What a wonderful thing!
A very good reminder! We (I) tend to forget that too often and feel like a failure in comparison to other women and their clean houses and hosting abilities.
I loved this piece, tweeted, facebooked, and followed you on Twitter. Blessings, BJ Robinson
Good day!Thank you for all that you do. I just want to leave a note of appreciation and gratefulness for you.This is one of the many sites I visit and it’s on my top best list.This area is so good to come to and read posts by people just like me,who’ve been out in the real world all day.It’s a journey of refreshment and joy in spite of what may be stressful at that time.I feel better about myself every time I come here.How cathartic is that!WhoooHooo!I love it here and thank you for being here and caring and teaching and sharing.God bless you!<3
YOUR words, so poignant to MY heart today are proof that HE is already fulfilling His purposes through you, and that I am listening! A win~win~win!
Thank-you Holley! Just what I need to hear at the minute. I’ve spent my entire life (33 years) not feeling good enough and like I can never match up to others and their talents, but your words have reminded me that its not their opinions and abilities that matter but God’s and how he can work in a unique way through me. thank-you x
YOUR words, so poignant to MY heart this day, are added proof that HE is already fulfilling HIS purposes through you, and that I am listening! A win~win~win!
Another ON point post. Thanks Holly
it’s like you heard the dialogue going back and forth in my head this morning and then posted this. Thank you, Holly, and thank You, Lord. I’m humbled yet encouraged and hope-filled that I can truly be who He’s created me to be. Looking up and focusing on HIS beautiful face.
I couldn’t even begin to explain how much i needed to hear THOSE words today.
Thank you
Amy
Wow, what awesome words! Thanks, Holley.
This email was a special blessing to me. It has been a big help with issues that have with one of my sibling’s. God Bless You Holley.
Thank thank for being honest and letting Jesus through. You do remind me where my focus should be and I thank God for you.
In Christ the solid rock WE stand!
Thank you, Holley, for this insight. Beautiful but so simple…I pray this is something I remember moving forward in those moments when I’m “not enough.” A precious reminder…
Thank you so much. It is just what I needed.
Such beautiful words, Holley. Thank you for just this. It touched a chord deep within me. You certainly have a gift for encouragement.
I’ve heard this stated before…..not as well as you said it but I always fall short of remembering its truth. I lost a very valuable member of our Caring Committee today because she doesn’t see herself in this role. I pray she will read your article today and see herself in a different light. You have a very unique way of reminding us of our value in this world. I go to God with requests for forgiveness for not saying or doing the right thing but if we are made in His image, we can’t be too far off track. God bless you, Holley.
Thank you so much for all of your comments and letting me know I’m not alone at all in this. SO glad you’re here! :)
Dear Holley, now we are playing alongside and cheering our Captain for Who HE is! By the way, are you the Coach for all those under our Captain? You are an instant hit!
This is so relevant for me today……thanks for the reminder that the truth that we are fearfully and wonderfully made applies to each one of of us…….even me.
Blessings.
I needed to be reminded I am the Only Me I’ve got. I keep thinking I am not enough and I didn’t do enough for my now grown children. I did what I knew with where I was. I am still in process. Thank you, God, for the pluses and minuses. I am confirmed again that I need God and me to walk this path designed just for me. He blesses me anyway.
AMEN Holley! You put the words into my head that the evil one tries to dissapate. I tend to compare myself & abilities & forget who & whose I am.
Thank you!
Holley, You are lovely just the way you are and I’m thankful there’s a warm-hearted and talented Holley in the world. You write to encourage your audience and share your wisdom to help us along the journey of life. You helped a tremendous amount of people with your words including me! Thank you for making a difference and teaching me that God created us all just the way we should be and that we are loved greatly by God! Have a great day! :)
love, Aimee
Great. Simply marvelous. The devil can be QUITE the sneak-ster.
:) blessings
Thank you Holly. I read this this morning, and it really hit home with me. I prayed about it and made a note to dig deeper in the coming days and months on comparison. Then my 8 year old son had a meltdown before football practice, because he felt he wasn’t a fast enough runner and a consistent blocker. WOW! Jesus used your words today to prepare me for a parenting crisis that was on the horizon. I am blessed that the thoughts I had previously meditated on were still fresh, and my son and I had an amazing conversation on comparison, ideals and God’s love . Thank you.
Holley…you are so perfectly right and in tune to God’s heart for us as women. I am so thankful you are no one but beautiful you. I enjoy your daily blog so much. It helps me grow a capacity to be me and celebrate who God has made me to be. It has been a consistent source of encouragement to me. God has both encouraged and comforted me and soooooo many others through His word and your blog because you chose to be content to be…you. As you said, YOU are the only YOU we’ve got. Don’t change. You are loved!
Holley you read my thoughts today, reminding me that I am me whom GOD made. Your words are so encouraging and uplifting , they are like a refreshing rain to me. Thank You, Love and Blessings to You. Emily
Well put! So much wasted time trying to do life “like others.” Yielding to Him working in the us He created.
I’m so glad you wrote about this. So many times I compare myself to another, especially the gifts and talents of another woman. I want to be that way, too, and be able to do those things easily and graciously. We’ve got to remember that God gave us our individual talents and gifts which are different and to not get caught up in comparing. We need to look at complementing each other to make a fuller gift.
Thank you for this blessed reminder! You always bless me through your email messages. Keep up being an encouraging writer to women. You are truly unique and blessed, like all of us. Through you God reminded us again of this truth. We serve an amazing God, His love for us is so great, His faith in each of us mind blowing. Your encouragement put a smile on my face, as your emails always do :) thank you
It’s so true – women play the comparison game and need to be reminded that God has made them (in Him – our identity lies in Him not what we do) unique and special and God and others need them to be themselves – to play their part in the body.
Thanks :) Bless you :)
Holley, needed this today…i keep wallpapering my mind with Ephesians 1…In Christ, I am blessed with every spiritual blessing, accepted in the beloved Son of God, adopted as a child of the King, chosen before the foundation of the world, redeemed by Christ’s blood, forgiven by God’s Grace, and loved with an everlasting love and underneath are the everlasting arms, a love that will not let me go… http://bethwillismiller.blogspot.com/2011/08/welcome.html
Thank you so much for this beautiful reminder that we are all equal in and through Christ. I’ve had a setback in my health and have been so upset in placing blame on Him, which I have profusely apologized for, and your words have been a great comfort. The Lord surely works greatly through you and I give Him thanks for you and all of your encouragement brought forth through your steadfast faith. God Bless!
Thank you for sharing this. It is overwhelmingly eyeopening. You’re writing seems to coincide with something I’m always going through. God is definitely working through you. God bless you.
Girl!! This is what my whole blog is about. So many women fall into this trap. I love what you said about how the enemy would like us to be like anyone but Jesus, so true!
I love
Thank you Holley for sharing this. So true, the enemy is good in telling us that we should be like so and so, instead of loving who God created us to be. We are his workmanship and every thread is different within the Master’s tapestry.
I love your blogs! It seems like just when I need to hear something, there it is, in your blog! Thank you for sharing all your amazing words from the Lord. God Bless you:)
Holly I thank God,for you always .you send in the right message at the right time.I ask God,did I ever fill like I wanted to be like someone else.? Was it hidden deep down inside me.because I don’t remember wanting to be.however ,you said something that stood out from the rest.that was,Lord,am I making a impact on my life representing You??? I’ve made mistakes ,but out of this mistakes,the eyes were open to God.because this person though that they could still have their way the same as before knowing Jesus.I hope I made sense to you.
I ‘want’ to be who I am. But that person never seemed to be good enough. That person was always too much this and not enough that. And I spent years trying to satisfy. Now all my efforts (though those efforts should never have been in the first place) are worthless and as a result I don’t know who the true me is. Facing this place of lost and empty has been hard and confusing and sometimes overwhelming. Satan sometimes beats me so hard with the lost and empty stick that I don’t know which way is up. But I am trying to learning-trying to wait-trying to hear the Lord tell me who He wants me to be.
God is really a good God. He knows exactly how, when, where and why to me us at the point of our need. Thanks Holley, I pray that you will continue to allow God to be the Commanding Chief of your life. May God continue to use you for His glory.
I and my husband often compare our house to others, thinking, “How do they find the time to clean and organize?” But I have to remember the only time I see my friends’ houses is when they are expecting me. Great blog.
Timely post for me today, Holly. Thank you!!!
Hi Holly,
I like to thx u for ur daily message it helps me through the day,to know God loves me so much and i am special in his eyes .thx u so much .
Holly , thx u so much for ur daily message there is always a message that touches my heart and lets me kno i am sprcial in Gods eyes .thx u for the encouragement u give to me I enjoy ur message everyday
Holly , thx u so much for ur daily message there is always a message that touches my heart and lets me kno i am sprcial in Gods eyes .thx u for the encouragement u give to me I enjoy ur message everyday .
the Lord always knows when i need to read your posts!! Thanks for being the tool you are in His hands!
This is so my issue lately as I try to hear The Voice about what is next (or perhaps that it’s not time for ‘what’s next’ yet…). I look at others and read about others pursuing their calling and think, “If I can get an opportunity like that” or “If I focused my energy like that”, then I could be doing the thing I think I should be doing. It’s so exhausting and really robs me of joy in doing the thing I can do right now…be a great wife, mom, friend, neighbor, etc. The Lord helped me recently to deal with these issues by realizing that all that I do has an audience of one…Him. If I can remember that, and remember that He is loving and compassionate and cheering me on, then my fears of measuring up really melt away. It’s a daily challenge, but one that I know He is with me in.
Good day, what a wonderful message your timing was perfect, each and every day is a struggle with the mind.. I hate it when the enemy tries and uses “simple” everyday people to say just one thing and then I feel defeated, as one gal said to me Friday after not explaining I had upset her,she was only looking at the situation from her end and said to me, It wasn’t worth explaining that I had issues.. and as I took it to the Lord HE gently reminded me we all have “issues” this is why HE had to die for us on a cross because we were born in sin.. thank you for your reminder that God made me just the way I am ..
Thank you for being you! Please pray for me, my mom passed away a few weeks ago. I’m really struggling with sadness and depression right now, but I know Jesus is Lord and will help me through this. Your words are always so kind and encouraging. In a world where we don’t often hear these things, it’s so needed! God Bless You! Jill
Hi Holley,
Another great post reminding us that He created each of us to be Ourselves!
Thankful that Jesus works through you to help us turn to Him.
Shalom, Sandy
thank you for this message todat. It reminded me of my time “vacuuming!” The Lord spoke to me about the same subject, but He led me to write a poem about this subject. I would like to share it with you. the Title I gave it is “Season’s”.
What season are we? Winter, Summer, Spring or Fall? Sometimes we try to be what we are not. Let’s look at summer, there so easy going and lot’s of fun too and they are really envied bt others like me and you. They searce the fun things in life and avoid any and all strife. they don’t like to be serious. they would much rather laugh and joke until we all become delirious. they are our sunshine to brighten the day as they whiz by on their buzy, buzy way. The cares of the wolrd are for others, you see, Oh, to be so care free. Now, let’s check out springs. Their as delicate as budding flowers, as pleasant as birds that sing. they have a fragrance that lingers for hours, and-Oh what peace they all bring. What about fall- they are so needed one and all. Even though they seem dry, they take care of buisness. the straight forward kind of guy. Fall’s are the ones’s that stand tall and know the direction in which to go. They plant thier feet and will not sway, They are our backbone from day to day. Last but not least is winter. They can wrap you up in thier warmth and shelter you from the cold. Their heart’s are like a fire that warms us to our soul. They brighten the cold dreary day and make you feel welcomed to just stay and stay. Winter is one we can run to in our times or distress and know they will help us find rest. God has created that happy go lucky summer and that fragile sensitive spring. He knew our need for the strong forcefull fall and then He made the arms of winter to comfort us all. With all four season’s the body of Christ is complete. For each builds each part from the top of the head to the bottom of the feet. To loook at the season’s of people I know is understanding that only God can show. Now I pray Lord, help me to see and then to be “the season You have created in me.
“By God” and Kay Smart.
Jill,
I just read your post. I too lost my mom a few weeks ago and have been finding it difficult. May God comfort you, holding you in his loving embrace to bring you peace.
Shalom, Sandy
Y’know the trap I fell into for a long time was thinking that being more like Jesus meant being more like certain other people. And when that didn’t work, I’d get all down and out. But one thing I’m learning how to do is to be like Jesus while being who He created me to be. Those things I’ve spent so long believing were weaknesses? A lot of them are actually strengths. :-)
Thank you for your timely words. I needed to read this today.
Hi!
Thanks for these words today. I sometimes feel that I need to change being a quiet and private person to fit better into this society. I love the part where you say that means we are created to show Him to the world in a way no one else ever has and no one else ever will.
God bless.
So good Holley! I’m learning to live as the person He made me to be, and to love her too!
I’m so glad God gave you the courage to live as who He made you to be! Yay! You are amazing!! We are blessed , as community, to get to learn with you!
Thanks!
You have no idea how much I needed to read that – and I am reading it over and over… struggling with comparisons, am I good enough? ect ect. thank you!
This is amazing Holley!
Thanks so much for the encouragement!!
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