Five minutes ago, I was on the phone, reporting to a friend of mine following a book research trip. Jackie had prayed me there and back, as she always has.
Our first encounter was the day my husband, our three-year-old daughter, and I moved into the house where we’ve now lived for forty years. At the time, I was wearing a grass-green fleece, hooded, zip-up, floor length robe, which accentuated the presence of our soon-to-be-born son. I must have looked like a miniature version of the Jolly Green Giant with a bloating problem.
At the door stood a couple in their mid-forties with grins on their faces and a pan of brownies. “Welcome to the neighborhood!” Jackie and Tom didn’t mention the shape I was in or the state of the box-strewn peach kitchen with orange countertops behind me. Their intention was to bless. I would soon discover it was their life’s goal.
Four words, “Welcome to the neighborhood,” began the friendship for which I’d prayed. The answer to my prayer didn’t come packaged as I’d imagined.
She wasn’t my age. She was old enough to be my mother, or rather, I was young enough to be her daughter. I had one, going on two, toddlers. Her children were getting ready to graduate from high school and college. I was a stay-at-home mom. She worked nights as a nurse and slept during the day. We didn’t go to the same church. At first, we didn’t even talk about matters of faith.
But one day when I stepped into her farmhouse a cornfield away from mine, literally to borrow a cup of sugar, I noticed a book of praise choruses on her piano.
“You play piano, Jackie?”
“A little. Mostly for my personal worship times.”
The moment ignited a far deeper level of friendship that continued to grow over four decades. What we shared between us was Jesus.
Jackie was, and still is, the spiritual mentor I’d craved — a caring and compassionate fellow traveler on the journey, a trustworthy confidante, a nudger when that’s what I needed, a faithful prayer partner. Within a handful of years, she had become my radio partner and a second on-air voice for The Heartbeat of the Home, a ministry neither of us saw coming. A ministry that retired after thirty-three years on the air.
We’ve talked each other down off many a ledge. Health issues. Family concerns. Her children’s choices. My children’s choices. Decision conundrums.
At times, I’ve wondered how other women survive without a “Jackie” in their life. Before every speaking engagement and at every junction in my writing career, she seeks God’s heart for me and the audience or readers. Her health keeps her homebound now. But we have a set time to talk by phone when she shares what God has laid on her heart and prays for me. Her prayers launch me on every ministry adventure.
In the early days of our friendship, we met for a couple of hours every Friday afternoon while my toddlers napped, or pretended to nap. We sat with our Bibles open in front of us, praying around the world and back again, focusing many of our prayers on our family members and their needs, often with tears falling onto the pages.
One day, I caught my four-year-old daughter kneeling on a dining room chair, turning the pages of the Bible that lay where I’d left it after Jackie had gone home. “What are you doing, Amy?”
“I’m looking for the tears.”
And a godly friendship set the table for another generation.
Leave a Comment
Summer Rae says
Dearest Miss Cynthia,
Thank you for sharing the words our loving Heavenly Father has laid on your heart, I can genuinely relate to your story… I am 20 years old and almost a year ago now the good LORD blessed my life with the wonderful woman of GOD I now call “Mama.” My mother went home to Jesus when I was young and I didn’t realize just how much I was missing. My Mama has challenged, encouraged and cared for me more than anyone has in a long time. I love her so much and I honestly don’t know where I would be today without her. Praise GOD. The “Jackie” in my life is named Mama Jen. Thank you again for sharing and I pray your day is blessed!
This side of Heaven,
Summer Rae
Cynthia Ruchti says
So glad you were “gifted” with Mama Jen. Enjoy every blessed moment of that relationship! And one day you will become a Mama Jen for someone else.
Bonnie says
So true! Nothing like God-given value and purpose.
Cynthia Ruchti says
You said it well, Bonnie.
Augusta says
Touching.May God Bless all the “Jackie” in our lives.
Cynthia Ruchti says
Isn’t that a great prayer? May God bless all the Jackies!
Bev @ Walking Well With God says
Cynthia,
I was struck right from the start of your wonderful post…Jackie’s mission in life was to bless others. I think when we live with that as our intention, with Christ at the helm, God will open up some paths to lifelong friendships! I think we need friends who are Christ followers from different generations. I’ve been blessed with a few women, older than me, who have shed such wisdom on my circumstances. I don’t know where I’d be if they hadn’t walked me through some of my trials, struggles, questions, and doubts. To have such a friendship is such a blessing. One of those women has gone to be with the Lord, but I am so thankful that God ordained that our paths would cross. Now, as I am finding myself being the “elder” one, I pray the Lord will use me in the life or lives of other young women. I think being open to being a blessing is step one….I love your daughter’s response. Our faith, as they say, is not so much taught as it is caught.
Blessings,
Bev xx
Cynthia Ruchti says
Caught rather than taught. So true. We wonder if we’re saying the right words when living God’s love openly and tenderly before others speaks far better than words ever do. Thank you, Bev.
Michele Morin says
My “Jackie” is named Peg and your words have just made me ever more thankful for the gift of this unexpected (and timeless!) friendship.
Cynthia Ruchti says
Michelle, today might be the day–if she’s still here–to send her this article as a thank you note to her. I’m doing that for my Jackie. As I look out my office window right now, I can see the century-old farmhouse in which she still lives.
Jan says
What a treasure you are for each other and for Jesus. Thank you for sharing. I have two friends with whom I share a similar deep friendship.
Cynthia Ruchti says
And although I didn’t go into detail about it, I have such a sweet circle of caring friends of all ages–some younger, some older, some in my stage of life–who have my back spiritually, physically, relationally. What beautiful gifts! How much better life is with those godly women beside me!
Tim Cole says
Every man or woman needs a Paul or Pauline in their life. The Savior was good to send one into your exprrince. I celebrate with you. Grace be with you. Tim Cole, Teaching Pastor, Grace Bible Church, St. Pete, Fl ponypastor@gbcemail.org;
Cynthia Ruchti says
Thank you for that comment, Tim. I have a feeling you’re the kind of pastor who prays for those connections for your congregation. Bless you for it.
Karen says
I want to be that kind of neighbor!
Cynthia Ruchti says
Smiling, Karen! It amazes me that Jackie reports she had been praying for a close sister-friend at the same time I was. We just didn’t know we’d find each other a cornfield away.
Karen says
I JUST moved to a new neighborhood with some young moms and want to invest in them….if they want! When I was their age I would have given my right arm for that kind of relationship.
Cindy says
I was blessed enough to have a mother-in-law that became my best friend and mentor. I became a Christian before I married but knew little she taught me so much. But sometimes you need someone you can pour your heart out too that is not your husbands mom. May God bless you as you reach out to these young women. I would have loved to have had that when I was transplanted from city to country when I married not knowing anyone but my husbands family. I didn’t even drive sometimes I felt so trapped and then before I knew it I had 2 little ones, oh for that special friend you can trust with anything. I am sure there are lots of young ladies just waiting for you. May God presence be with you and felt by each young lady you meet
Cynthia Ruchti says
Wise words, Cindy. Thank you.
Janie Mc says
What an amazing story of Gods love for you. He knows we each need a spiritual mentor, a friend we can be real with, one you don’t have to have it all together with. I love that and too have been blessed with a Godly sister. Thank you Father for the many examples of your love for us.
Blessed by your message.
Cynthia Ruchti says
Thank you, Janie. Yours is a beautiful reminder not to take those cherished friendships for granted.
Kathy Cheek, Devotions from the Heart says
I want to be that kind of friend and I want to have that kind of friend! And I know the blessing went both ways between both of you, God’s favor was in it all the way. Thanks for sharing this beautiful story that should inspire all of us to go further in our relationships with those around us.
Cynthia Ruchti says
Kathy, I appreciate your words. My heart is drawn to several young women around me, some who KNOW I’m praying for them, others who don’t yet know it. And the beat (of God’s heart) goes on. And the beat goes on.
Rebecca L Jones says
I read a phrase once, ” Be the person you needed when you were younger. ” I think applies to a lot of us. This is such a wonderful story, a true ” Lifetime ” movie with all that silliness. And I love that your daughter looked for tears. Your picture is cute, forever young, you don’t look like grandma.
Cynthia Ruchti says
What if that phrase–“Be the person you needed when you were younger”–were stenciled above our doorways before we left our houses to be among coworkers, church family, neighborhoods, volunteer projects…? I love both the churches and homes that have signs both on the entrance and exit that say, “You are now entering your mission field.” So true. So true.
Karen says
Rebecca, I LOVE that and it is so true!
Andrea says
Love that quote! Thank you
Cynthia Ruchti says
Thanks for your comment, Andrea!
Melissa Henderson says
I love how God sends us special friendships along the way. He knows just what we need exactly when we need it. 🙂
Cynthia Ruchti says
May this be an encouragement to anyone STILL waiting for that forever friend. I’ve been blessed to have had many through the course of my life. With some, we still sign our emails to one another, Forever Friend.
Karyl Hamelink says
I know Jackie and love her dearly. She and Tom were so kind and friendly when we moved into the neighborhood. I really miss hearing your voices on the radio and I miss seeing Jackie and Tom riding their bikes past my house. What a great relationship you have with her! Next time you talk to her tell her I said hi!
Cynthia Ruchti says
I will do that, Karyl. What a blessing they’ve been. What a legacy they’ve left!
Penny says
Cynthia.
This was beautiful, and what a blessing for you to have met Jackie.That was so sweet of your daughter, I could picture her looking for the tears.
“And a godly friendship set the table for a new generation.” Thank-you for sharing this with us.I am thankful for the Jackie’s I’ve had in my life.
Have a blessed day all,
Penny
Cynthia Ruchti says
Penny, this was as much of a reminder to me as to anyone reading it. Friendship like this are worth cherishing, especially when they draw us closer to God.
Serena says
What a blessing! I so envy you.
When I was living in Chicago the same thing happened, I was invited by this friend who asked me to join their book club. That started such a wonderful journey of praying together until my husband and I had to move to another state discerning God’s call. Since then we had to move again. Until now I couldn’t find the prayer partner like I had while in Chicago. I’m still praying and believing God for His miracle. Thank you for sharing your encouragement. I pray for all of us that such divine encounters will continue as an inspiration to all that praying together is even better than praying alone though there’re times and seasons for everything. Cheers 🙂
Cynthia Ruchti says
Thanks, Serena. It’s interesting that Jackie came from Chicago prior to moving to the farm that would be “next door” to mine a few years later. In HIM we live, and move, and have our being. Praying He will move that sister-friend close to you very soon!
Missy Scudder says
Ahh Cynthia. Your Jackie was my June. My lifelong discipler/mentor. I met her when I had just a 1 yr old. For kids later, she still always had time for me. She became Gramma June to my kids. We had joys and heartaches. I helped nurse her husband as he was dying and 6 yrs later when her husband died.
21/2 yrs ago, the LORD took my June home. This woman who mothered me and loved me and encouraged me and scolded me when it was needed wad the most influential person in my life. She continually pointed me to Jesus in every conversation we had. I had her in my life for 38 years. I only had my own morher for 21 years.
I am thankful for this blog and to God for giving you Jackie. Be thankful for her everyday.
I so miss my June. And pray that I can be a June to someone for that long.
Cynthia Ruchti says
Oh, Missy! What a treasure you had! Yes, I’m grateful every day.
Pam Steinke says
I love the same Jackie you do! What an encouraging gift she has been to me all these years too. Such a sweet, giving spirit and a tender, loving heart! I moved across the country 28 years ago and Jackie’s prayers have followed me wherever I go.
Cynthia Ruchti says
And how many more would say the same, Pam? Her legacy is deep and wide.
Shauna says
This truly touched my heart and had me in tears. I am recalling the women in my life who were mentors and friends, both to my mother and myself. God always places people on my life to keep me accountable, and not only have some of those people been older, a couple of them have been younger women who were managers over my department! I guess this may seem off topic, because I can’t say that there has only been one very close friend like this; there have been multiples. And in turn, there are younger women whom I have known since their teens that have looked to me as a mentor–and that sometimes feels almost awkward. I just keep praying through it.
Another note: you must have found the fountain of youth, because in your picture you look 28-30 yourself, not someone who has children ages 43 and 40!
Cynthia Ruchti says
I claim the joy of the Lord as my fountain of youth, Shauna. 🙂 The picture is only a year old. 🙂
Angie Pollard says
What a wonderful post: it made me cry. My ‘Jackie’ is called Renee: I could pour my heart out to her as to no one else and I have been there for her at times of need. Her friendship still blesses me but it has changed as she now has dementia – she is still unutterably sweet but I miss the person she was. I pray I can become a ‘Renee’ to some other woman.
Cynthia Ruchti says
Angie, so poignant. I landed on your words “unutterably sweet.”
Beth Williams says
Cynthia,
God knows what we need when we need it. So thankful for friends-mentors who walk us through trials. I have a few mentors with whom I can share life. I can call or text them when trouble hits and they are there to listen. Now I feel it is my turn. I will be someone’s Jackie. I will listen to your troubles, pray for & encourage you if needed. Also if health issues arise then I might make a meal to help out.
Blessings 🙂
Cynthia Ruchti says
I’m talking to my Jackie in a few minutes to capture the encouragement and receive the blessing of her prayers for me as I head out to three events out of state this week. I will tell her how much of an impact she’s had on people like you, Beth, who have said, “I will be someone’s Jackie.”