“It came!”
I hit the send button, shouting my words over to Kelly’s phone as I stood holding the new book. I was more than a little giddy at the thought of studying the story of Gideon with my friend in the coming weeks.
Kelly’s reply came swiftly, “That’s great! Glenda and Kailey said they’ll be joining us!”
As I read her words, my heart dropped a little. I suddenly felt nervous.
The kind of nervous where you calculate ages and seasons of life and wonder if this group of women will be a likely fit.
Kelly, our hostess, had the heart of a servant that equally matched her love for Jesus. Single, yet a second mother to many of our high school youth girls, she continuously opened her home and poured out her heart to those in her path. Kailey, our newlywed, had a remarkably seasoned faith for someone so young and the most positive outlook on life of anyone I’d ever met. I was the task-oriented, career-driven mom of four, trying to balance my job, my husband’s business, child rearing, and several areas of ministry.
And then there was Glenda.
Glenda, a well-loved pastor’s wife in our own congregation, was a mother to us all. She was the chief encourager who would ever-so-gently ask, “So how’s that working out for you?” when she chided us about an area she knew very well needed extra prayer or more consideration. Her tone was never void of love toward any one of us.
Honestly? I can’t say why I questioned our gatherings, but I did. I questioned whether or not I could share my story among them. I asked myself if my faith would stand up to theirs.
Trying hard to dismiss the apprehension, I couldn’t shake that pang of nervousness standing outside Kelly’s door before our first meeting. Yet, as I took hold of the knob and entered quietly through the living room, there sat three women, eagerly beaming up at me.
What I felt moments earlier was forgotten.
All of us friends individually, yet never together like this. Never to sip tea and bare souls, laugh and cry as one. What began as a simple get-together in a friend’s home turned into this place of sacred ground.
God gifted this, you see? These hours in the week where the strongest bonds of friendship could be sown between the most unlikely of women.
We called our time together Mustard Seed, because this is where we prayed for mountains to move. For doctoral school acceptance letters and the directions of our jobs, for leadership in the church and how to help our youth. This is where we prayed for cancer to be removed and for healing to be restored.
We bonded and we learned to love big.
But, as seasons ebb and flow, our lives began to travel in different directions. Kailey would move to Baltimore so her husband could acquire his PhD. Kelly would dedicate more time and effort into the youth program. I would make good on a calling to leave the professional workforce and take my place at home with my family.
And Glenda . . .
Glenda would hear the word “metastasized” from her doctor, along with several other complications.
But our friendship didn’t end. And neither would our prayers.
We prayed Kelly through leading teens to Christ and for me to transition out of my career. We prayed Glenda through brain surgery and rounds of chemo and radiation. And we prayed Kailey through her first pregnancy, one that held so much uncertainty as the doctors confirmed her baby boy had a case of cystic hygroma. The odds were stacked against him.
Yet, as time passed and seasons shifted once again, we were able to rejoice with Kailey. Gideon, her precious baby boy with the swath of extra skin behind the neck, came into this world with a reminder that he had beaten the odds. God heard our prayers and we got to see a miracle before our eyes.
However, not long after such grateful news, our sweet friend, Glenda, took her last breath. While there is joy in knowing she no longer suffers, the hole she leaves behind is deep.
It’s been only weeks now. And while this group of three remembers her through our grief, we look to the relationships that remain – those whose lives she’s touched. We share stories and aspire to be “just like Glenda” in the way she lived her life with open arms and ears to hear the hearts of so many.
As I stop and reflect on how this friendship began, over Scripture’s story of Gideon, I remember the man recruited by God to do the seemingly impossible. Just like Gideon’s unlikely circumstances, so our friendship got its legs in the same way.
Women, from different walks of life spread over several generations, coming together to beat what odds we might stack against ourselves before even giving friendship a chance.
Gideon became a mighty warrior. We women became mighty fierce friends.
Leave a Comment
Mary Huff says
Did you use the Bible along with a study book about Gideon? If so what was the title of the study book?
I would love to know for the ladies that get together each week to study. Right now we are studying Proverbs.
Thanks
Jennifer Frisbie says
Mary, we did! Priscilla Shirer’s study Gideon – Your Weakness, God’s Strength, was the study we chose. I highly recommend it.
Kristen says
Mary, do you live in the Buffalo area by any chance?
Bev @ Walking Well With God says
Jennifer,
What a beautiful testimony of how God can bring a group together that He ordains for such a time as this. It is a lot easier to share one on one, or with people in similar life stages, or of the same ethnic or cultural background, but God always calls us to step outside our comfort zone to experience something much greater than we can ever imagine. We like to build walls. God likes to build bridges. I love having conversations and fellowship with our teaching staff in the Middle East. We can conquer boundaries, bear each others burdens, and rejoice with each other when we have One person in common – Jesus. He is the great bond maker! When two or more are gathered in His name….it is truly sacred ground. Thank you so much for sharing and I am grieving with you over your loss of Glenda.
Blessings,
Bev xx
Gail says
Jennifer Frisbie says
Thank you, Bev. I always see your comments on here to all of the wonderful writers and your words are so encouraging. Thank you for taking the time to read and share with me today. Such a blessing!
Nancy Ruegg says
Bev, these words in your comments caught my eye: “We like to build walls. God likes to build bridges.” Oh, have I experienced that preference in my life! Each time our clergy family was moved to another church, I wanted to build walls that would keep us where we were–comfortable and secure. Instead, God built bridges to new places (five times), new relationships, new areas of ministry. Looking back on those years (we’ve been retired now three years), I am so thankful for every church, every opportunity for spiritual growth, and those new relationships that turned into old friends. Jesus is indeed a great bond maker! Thank you for inspiring gratitude and praise in my heart just now!
Bev @ Walking Well With God says
Nancy,
So true. I’ve moved around this country quite a bit and each move I’ve not wanted to go where God was leading me. Partially because, perhaps, I wasn’t trusting Him to bring me to a place He had already prepared. But, oh what joy when we follow in obedience and I am thankful for those many bonds that were made, that if it were up to me, would never have happened. Joining with you in gratitude and praise.
Blessings,
Bev xx
Beth Moore says
“…coming together to beat what odds we might stack against ourselves before even giving friendship a chance” Wow! How often we don’t give God or friendship a chance to do that miracle that only He can see on the front end. Thanks for sharing your story and I’m praying for the days ahead for your fierce friendship tribe that God has knit together.
Jennifer Frisbie says
Thank you so much, Beth. Your prayers are coveted. <3
Rick says
I love this, praise God and thank you for sharing your heart.
Jennifer Frisbie says
Love you, friend. Grateful for the impact you’ve both had on our lives.
Rick says
Jen, I just read this again and I don’t have enough words to express how precious this is to me, it reminds me so much of the love Glenda had for you three and and so many other young women in our church family. I always enjoyed the few minutes I got to sit in with you four when I came to pick her up. Keep sharing your heart my friend.
Marina says
Beautiful! How we all long for this type of sacred space!
Jennifer Frisbie says
Thank you, Marina! <3
Penny says
Jennifer,
I am deeply sorry for your loss. God’s gift of your memories will be something you’ll always keep.
Your story of genuine friendship, and the bond that was formed despite the odds, was lovely. Thank-you for sharing it with us……
Have a blessed day all,
Penny
Jennifer Frisbie says
Penny, you are so right about the gift of those memories. And there are so many! Thank you for reading and sharing with me today.
Kathy says
What a beautiful and touching story. Thank you for encouraging me today!
Jennifer Frisbie says
And thank you for sharing in my story by reading today, Kathy. Have a blessed weekend!
Shauna says
Thank you for sharing such a powerful story. Our church has just lost a gentleman who, with all of his human faults, never lost sight of Jesus. Our loss is truly heaven’s gain, but oh the void left here. Prayers for your little circle of friends, and for your church family and Glenda’s family as they navigate new territory without her loving guidance.
Jennifer Frisbie says
I know so well the “void” you speak of, but I know there is much rejoicing at the thought of no more pain or sorrow that this world continuously throws us. I covet your prayers and your kind words today. Thank you.
Liz says
Thank you for encouraging with your faith and love and for sharing this sorrow so we could pray for you.
Jennifer Frisbie says
Thank you so much, Liz.
Michele Morin says
Jennifer, I love the kind of group you describe, and the words that bubble up out of my heart right now are these:
We really need each other!
At all seasons of life, we have something to offer, and we have much that we need. To expect all that giving and receiving to happen with people who are our mirror image is unrealistic. I love how you introduced your circle of friends to us with such intimacy. The love shines through the spaces between the words!
Jennifer Frisbie says
Amen. You’ve expressed my sentiments exactly. Thank you for stopping by to read my story today, Michele.
Mary Jane Payne says
Jennifer,
I too, have a story similar to yours. The ladies of 8, asked me to join them in a Bible Study/prayer time. As the older lady, I had no idea why they wanted me, loved the idea of their lives & mine joining together for such a time as this. We would meet every Friday at a set place & time. Laughed, cried & shared our most intimate prayer requests for our families, church & country. But one by one, the group got smaller due to health & personal issues. But as the group got smaller the closer we became. My husband passed away suddenly while serving on a mission trip in Alaska & all of those ladies were there by my side. One went through a divorce & we were right there praying & be a shoulder to cry on. Ladies need other ladies to pray for, study God’s Word & lean on. Thank you for sharing your story. Prayers for you & Glenda’s family.
Jennifer Frisbie says
Thank you, Mary Jane. Not only for reading here today but for sharing your own bit of testimony. True friendships are nothing short of a blessing. <3
Diane Bailey says
Jennifer, sweet friend, you have me in tears this morning. Thank you for this post and for your heart for women!
Jennifer Frisbie says
Thank you, sweet Diane! <3
Ruthie says
Thank you for sharing. I’m so touched by your relationship with all these wonderful ladies. I’ve always wished for a friendship of this kind. For Glenda, may her sweet and gentle soul rest peacefully. I pray for a heart like hers.
Jennifer Frisbie says
I do, as well. Thank you, Ruthie.
Brenda says
Jennifer, I’m sorry for your loss. Prayers for you and the other Mustard Seeds as you work through your shared grief. ((hug))
Jennifer Frisbie says
Thank you, Brenda. Each of us, as well as so many others who have had their lives touched, are cherishing the memories.
Kelly Smith says
Perfect timing! We launch a new season of small groups this week. I’m always a little apprehensive about who will fill the chairs in our group. Will we fit together? Will it be awkward? God orchestrates beautiful friendships from these chairs!
Jennifer Frisbie says
Yes, Kelly. He certainly does!
Elsa Seidel says
My “sacred place” is every Tuesday morning- an appointment with several dear ladies. We share, occasionally vent, and then an hour or so of praying for each other – also knowing that our praises and concerns will be lifted up throughout the week.
Jennifer Frisbie says
Elsa, I’m sure you never miss those appointments, do you? Such a special part of the week!
~Karrilee~ says
Oh friend… I love this so much –for all the reasons! So fun to see you here in this space… and praying for you and everyone rejoicing and weeping! Much love!
Jennifer Frisbie says
Thank you for visiting me here, friend! <3
Deeann Saint says
Jennifer,
Thank you for sharing your precious story. It really struck a note with me and I can relate on so many levels. That awkward feeling of not fitting in. Realizing that Gods plan fits perfectly in our lives. It’s up to us to step out of our comfort zone and let God do his part.
Thank you for sharing.
Jennifer Frisbie says
Deeann, so glad to see you here today. I know how difficult it is to step out of that comfort zone but I am grateful for the opportunities He’s given me to do so over the last several years. I am grateful for this growth. Thank you for reading!
Leisa L says
I’ve always been envious of the closeness (friendship & spiritual challenging of one another) of your group. I hope one day that God will provide such a group for me. I know it was just what each of you needed “for such a time as this”.
Jennifer Frisbie says
Oh, Leisa, thank you. Your words mean a lot, but also break my heart a little. I had been searching for it and never seemed to find it, but God had it worked out all along. Thank you for your constant encouragement and your friendship. Love you, friend!
Leisa L says
Isn’t it funny (not really), how you’d been searching but never could find it…but it found you!! All because of God’s perfect timing. That’s what made it so special. It wasn’t anything that you could form…but He had the perfect recipe for all of you to mix together into this wonderful delicacy of friendship & mentorship.
I know He will meet my desires somehow, sometime, in some way, and in the meantime, I’m truly thankful for the friends I have, including you!
Nancy Ruegg says
Thank you, Jennifer, for sharing your success story of divergent people of different ages coming together and bonding in friendship and support of one another. An inspiring role model for us to follow!
Jennifer Frisbie says
Nancy, it was my pleasure to share the story. I have a card pinned up on my desk right now from (in)courage that quotes “You have stories to tell that the world needs to hear” – and I know how very true this is for all of us. I am so encouraged by the stories that others share here in this space. So grateful I had a chance to share one of mine. Thank you for visiting today and being an encouragement to me.
Lisa says
I too often feel the hesitation that you felt as you opened the door but more times than not after I have gone go rough that door I am forever grateful that I did! Thanks for sharing your heartwarming story!
Beth Williams says
Jennifer,
Sweet sister praying for you all in your loss. Losing a friend is never easy. May God provide comfort & peace to your souls. Loved the intricate introduction of each person. You described them so well that I could envision them.
Gideon was an awesome Bible study. God created us for community. He knows exactly what & who we need at the right time. It may seem odd to us, but He sees the bigger picture. Friendships can be made at any age. I’m always amazed at the people God puts in front of me to be friends with. Most of them are older-in their late 60s-70s. That’s ok. I can learn a lot from them & they can learn from me.
Blessings 🙂
Rebecca L Jones says
Everyone needs a sacred place, that it was shared with other is great. God often does put a menagerie of woment together, different ages, backgrounds, each has soemthing to offer. I am sorry about your friend. I like her phrase, ” How’s that working for you? ” I can imagine my answer.
Karen Scates Rhyne says
Well said and well written Jennifer.
Beth Coulton says
What a wonderful post! I too have been a part of a seemingly unlikely-to-gel kind of Bible study group, but some of my strongest friendships remain out of that gathering of oh so many different ages and stages of life women. It’s just the most wonderful experience, and I’m so glad you have had that in your life. They sound like some amazing women- just like you!