Psalm 139:13

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

On May 14, 2010 my baby, Charlotte, died shortly after birth.  A few hours after she died my husband and I left the hospital with empty arms and broken hearts.

I let friends and family know Charlotte was gone via social networks, it was too difficult to call and tell them our baby died unexpectedly.

I wrote that she was with Jesus, safe in the beauty of heaven for reasons unknown, but hopefully in time we would know why she couldn’t stay with us.

As the days without her became weeks and then months the medical files and reports rolled in.

A steady tide of questions with no answers buried beneath the waves. On the death certificate, on the autopsy report and on the insurance reports the most devastating moment of our lives was reduced to one line: neonatal death, cause unknown.

I wanted to know why she died, what I did wrong, where I messed up.

My faith in God went from true, steadfast, and trusting to confused, wary, and hurt.

I continued attending church off and on, my attendance far from regular.

I didn’t turn away from God, but I set him aside, stepped around our relationship gingerly, uncertain of the Father who promised to love me, set my path, and keep me safe. (Jeremiah 29:11).

On September 9, 2011 my son, Bennett, was born healthy and safe after a long, stressful pregnancy. Carrying a second child changed my faith perspective. I slowly began shifting closer to God with small shuffling footsteps.

Prayer sustained me and gave me hope at the end of my pregnancy. On the mornings I was too scared to get out of bed I prayed for strength to make it through one more day.

And when I went into labor I prayed for courage, peace, hope and joy. I wanted to be excited to meet my baby. I didn’t want to dread his birth day. I thought the fear would lead me to beg for a c-section, but the Lord gave me strength to birth naturally like I wanted to.

Since Bennett’s birth my faith has increased tenfold. I realized I don’t have to understand why Charlotte died.

God has a plan, He is in control, and it’s okay for me to relinquish my need to know why she died.  I can accept the uncertainties and unknowns, and the fact that we have not been provided with concrete reasons, with the understanding that God’s plan will be revealed someday.

I need to trust and respect the answer I’ve been given, even though it’s not the one I would like.

I can speculate all I like. Maybe God wanted me to long for heaven. If so, that has certainly been accomplished! I can’t wait to be reunited with my Charlotte. Maybe He wanted me to rely solely on Him.

Maybe I needed to be broken so I would seek Him.

Whatever the reason, the answer is in heaven. I don’t have to search for it on Earth anymore.

I can be content in the knowledge that Charlotte is safe with Jesus and I will hold her again.

By, Angela Rodman, Little Bird

In the spring of 1993, I was a senior in high school. I was preparing to graduate. But graduation was the farthest thing from my mind. As spring came into full bloom and May drew closer, there was one thing and one thing only that I was thinking about and that was Prom. And I, I was a Baptist pastor’s daughter.

In case you don’t know what that means, I’ll tell you: most Baptists don’t dance. I had a very tall hurdle in front of me. I wanted to go to the prom so badly that I begged, I pleaded, and I bargained with my dad. Finally he acquiesced. I could go to the prom, on one condition: I had to lay low… I was absolutely not to make a big deal of this. We didn’t want the deacons finding out, right?

On the evening of the dance, I donned a beautiful bright pink taffeta dress, I hopped into my date’s freshly washed shiny red Toyota and we were off to have fun and be as inconspicuous as possible. And oh, did we have fun!

I didn’t realize until the following morning that I had been unsuccessful with the “inconspicuous” part of the plan. There on the very front page of my hometown’s Sunday morning newspaper was a picture of me, arm in arm with my date, large as life in our fancy prom duds, our names in the caption box below.

So much for incognito…

Twenty years later, I can laugh about the story with my parents. Sort of. But, I still feel the details of the story like it was yesterday; my face flushes several shades of bright red and my pulse races to new heights.

Back then I was so nervous to see my dad’s reaction! I wanted to hide the Sunday paper, but that was futile since I was sure that all of the deacons got the Sunday paper. There was one thing that had been impressed on me long before that day, but now it was stuck permanently to me like glue : dancing is wrong. Except, its not. At least, that’s what I’ve learned since then.

Actually, it was only a few weeks ago that I realized just how right dancing can be.

My children and I were sitting at the breakfast table, getting ready to start our school day. The atmosphere was a bit heavy because of a few things going on in our family; a sick friend was in genuine need, an uncle of mine had passed away recently, and of course there were all of the other frustrations and plain old junk that happens. We were life-less while we sat munching our cereal, completely weighed down by it all.

Instead of beginning our day with the usual memory work that goes with our home school curriculum, I decided to put on our CD of Scripture songs by Seeds Family Worship. We started bee-bopping at the table, singing along. Songs from Matthew and Jeremiah and Isaiah, were ringing out with truths we needed to hear like, “Ask and it will be given to you,” and “Call to me and I’ll answer,” and “Do not fear for I am with you.”

We’d heard these tunes before, but they were new that morning. And then something indescribable happened. There was this unexpected, blissful freedom lifting us right out of our seats and propelling our bodies into movement. Singing along was just not enough.  Before I knew it we were up dancing and giggling and jumping right out of our sorrows.

Now, I’m sure we looked funny. As you can imagine, I am not a dancer in a groovy, “Oooh! That girl’s got moves,” kind of way. But, we were moved by the exciting truths from God’s Word – and when that happened, there was such a release of joy right in our living room!

Should I be surprised? In Ecclesiastes, it says there is a time for mourning, but also for dancing. Psalm 30 talks about how HE is able to turn our mourning into dancing. It makes so much sense to me as I think about it now: when I begin to meditate on the power of His promises, the burdens are lifted and my feet really do become light.

I’m so thankful for a Heavenly Father who inspires new dance moves at a moment’s notice, just when I need to “get moving” with a new attitude! The life He gives really does turn sadness into a dance of unspeakable joy!

By: Melody Day, Daily Portion

Photo Credit

This is a huge responsibility, this raising of boys.

We are raising the next generation of leaders

We are raising future husbands and fathers.

We are raising boys that will someday have a wife that they need to love, cherish, respect, and adore.

We are showing them, with our love, how to be a team.

How to talk to one another.

Do they see us respecting one another in our disagreements, in our struggles?

Do they see us pray when times get tough and the world is a mess around us?

Do they see us seek joy and praise Him even when we weep?

We are teaching them to treat women with respect, can you see boys, how your Daddy respects me?

How he still, after these almost 9 years of marriage, dates me, surprises me, adores me….

We are teaching them to treat girls, and women well.

In an age where girls flaunt themselves like pieces of property

and disrespect themselves by the clothes they wear,

the words they say and the actions they take…

How do we raise these boys to close their eyes to that, to refrain from that?

How do we teach them to resist those temptations, to stand firm and wait?

To keep themselves until that day they walk down the altar.

In an age where men have been asked to become less than,

how do we teach them to be bold leaders and take the charge and be strong and manly?

We pray, we pray a prayer of desperation….

Guard their hearts, their minds, their bodies.

Put your family first, your job is second.

God should be at the center.

You need to lead, don’t let others tell you different.

You were made to be the leader, don’t let this world strip you of your manhood and become something less than intended.

Do you see how we protect our family?

Do you see how we spend time with friends and family and do life with others?

Do you see how being a part of a community is important?

I know that you are not mine.

You are HIS and He has lent you to me, to us, expecting great things from your Daddy and I….

as we did not bring your into this world on a whim…but prayed and ached for you all.

Knowing the responsibility and seeing it before our eyes are two different things. Such a heavy load to bear.

So do it. Get dirty, be noisy.

Don’t sit still, don’t be quiet.

Be loud, make a mess, jump from high places, push the limits….be wild.

Be a boy.

My heart prays you turn out just like your Daddy.

The example he has set before you…follow it.

Do you know how blessed you are to have him as your example?

I breathe a little easier, knowing this.

My tender, over-protecting heart asks God,

“Why did you give me boys?”

These people that need to be let free…

These little ones who will soon let go of me, to cling to their Daddy more.

Oh, if I could only wrap you in my arms and protect you from it all…..

But then, you would not accomplish what He intends for you.

Those battles, those tests…they will make you stronger.

How to pray for that? To pray for hardship and trial so that you will see Him, and see what He has done for you.

That is a hard prayer….

We will not always do it the right way, we will fail you.

But He will not.

By: Krystle Bowen, 3 Little Men & a Mommy

“Bless her heart! She clearly doesn’t have a friend in the world. If she did, they would have told her never to wear that outfit again!”

Meet my “inner judge”. She has escaped and is on the loose again. And even when she’s captured, it’s like trying to stuff a jack in the box back down inside and out of sight.

“Do not judge others, and you will not be judged. For you will be treated as you treat others. The standard you use in judging is the standard by which you will be judged.” Matt 7:1-2

“The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7b NLT

Even though we know that a way to escape being judged is to withhold judging others, we can’t quite get there. After all, I’m not really judging, I tell myself. I’m simply expressing my opinion. The problem is that once we start down a critical path, it’s a slippery slope. And we’ve opened ourselves up to the work of the enemy. God’s desire is always to see us built up. The enemy’s goal is to tear down.

Jesus was clear – don’t go there. In John chapter 8, He himself is cautioning others not to judge Him. As my pastor recently said, “Jesus couldn’t get a job today in His own church. He didn’t have a Divinity degree, didn’t even attend Bible school, never owned anything of real value, traveled around with a bunch of misfits, hung out with tax collectors and prostitutes. He needed a haircut and He never married.” That resume would have been quickly tossed into the “no thanks” pile.

All we have is our paltry human standards as criterion. And that’s a pretty pitiful set of guidelines. And we forget that we are subject to those same standards from those around us. Everyone but Him.

So how do we avoid becoming the judge once we’ve shoved her back in the box? Don’t carry the box around! Burn it on the altar of your heart! It’s not my job to assess and pronounce sentence on those around me on every issue from fashion to lifestyle. It IS my job to love them, pray for them, and share the Word and the joyful acceptance by God of who we are with them. It’s up to Him to address those things that are not pleasing to Him. And my guess is that the fact that those shoes do not go with that dress is really of very little interest to Him.

As a parent, the Father is none too pleased to see one of His children judged critically. He is pretty protective. And He has chosen to use some pretty odd folks along the way. I’m pretty sure John, hanging out in the wilderness, clothed in animal skins, got a lot of folks talking.

I will choose, Lord, to see those around me with new eyes. Eyes that watched the crowd mock you while He chose to see me as beautiful, worthy of your death on the cross. “

If you judge people, you have no time to love them. Remind me today Lord, that you alone are appointed and qualified to judge. Help me “burn the box!”

By Deb DeArmond, MyPurposeNow

What happens when you awaken to the fact that life is not quite what you imagined it to be? When hopes and dreams are not coming to fruition and you can see no way clear that they ever will? What happens when you wake up to a tantrum and it’s your own?

These grown up temper tantrums are not the throw yourself on the ground and kick and scream, although sometimes it does seem tempting. No. Grown-up tantrums take on a grown up kind of feel. They are manifested through various ways. It could be a subtle emotional disconnect from husband, children, loved ones. It could be a checking out of the moment and living in the ‘what ifs’.

It can be listening to lies that eventually spread to reality skewing what is truth.

But no matter how the tantrum manifests itself, what we are saying is this: ‘I don’t like this—this is not what I hoped for, dreamed for, planned for and I want it changed…now!’

Surrender is one key to stopping the tantrum.

Surrender to God who breathes stars and by his voice put this world in motion and is also in control of my personal little world.

Trust is the other.

Trust that he has my back and everything I experience goes through the filter of his love—including difficulties. Especially difficulties.

Staying the course when I ride the same conflict wheel over and over again like a little hamster in a wheel makes me want to scream. Staying the course when my decisions are questioned by people who matter can grip me with indecision. Staying the course when I’m not really at the beginning and I am not at the end, but somewhere in the middle feels like an unending road trip.

Growing up on the plains of Montana I know the meaning of ‘middle of nowhere’ and up there, you have to stay the course to get to your destination. There are no pit stops. The road stretches out unendingly before you and the landscape appears to engulf you. Some have called the plains of Montana desolate and barren, but I have learned to see the beauty.

Is it possible to view this ‘staying the course’ time as beauty as well? When all seems barren and desolate and I long to turn back or take a different course, couldn’t I ask for my eyes to be opened to the beauty of this time?

I need to look for Isaiah 41:18-19: ‘I will make rivers flow on barren heights, and springs within the valleys. I will turn the desert into pools of water and parched ground into springs. I will put in the desert the cedar and the acacia, the myrtle, and the olive. I will set pines in the wasteland, the fir and the cypress together, so that people may see and know, may consider and understand, that the hand of the Lord has done this, that the Holy One has created it.’

I have learned that the Lord’s power is more majestic and amazing when it is showcased against a backdrop of a barren and desolate landscape. Could it be that during this ‘staying the course’ time, the Lord is simply waiting for me to trust Him and to trust His power in my life?

Could we agree together that no matter the landscape we will surrender and trust Him to turn barrenness into beauty? He will, my friend, and it will knock your socks off. And when he does, will you rejoice with me?

Jess

Exhausted, I stare down into the sink. It’s clogged. Has been for several weeks. When it does slowly drain it leaves a dark grimy film, and no matter how many times I scour it, the grime returns each time it’s clogged.

(Which is daily.)

I stare at the water; it isn’t going anywhere. I look up into the mirror, my face red from exertion, hair soaked with sweat. I just got off the treadmill.

The absurdity of it strikes me: I’m exhausted from running nowhere.

In so many ways.

Tears sting my eyes as my reflection blurs sideways. I had thought about it while running, had thought about how ridiculous it was to run, all alone, for forty minutes and not get anywhere.

Why God?

Why am I getting nowhere?

Everyday I get up. You do too. Everyday we obey God in the mundane details of life behind the scenes. We wipe counters, noses, and bottoms.  We listen, labor, love–often alone. We wash, work, worship. And then we wake up the next morning and do it all again.

Kinda sounds like a treadmill to me.

I poured this out to Him as I ran, one foot in front of the other, scenery never changing. The only thing ahead of me was a wall.

That’s how my days feel sometimes as well.

My exercise is in obedience to God. I’m obeying Him with my body. He clearly called me to this, so I obey. Get up each morning. Get on my knees. Spread out His Word. Ask. Seek. Lace up the shoes. Run the miles. Write the words. Raise the kids.

Repeat.

Sometimes the scenery never changes.

Then why run it?

I ask Him this, these exact words, while pounding out the steps, keeping pace with prayer. His still small voice:

“Because you’re training.”

Tears fall on the treadmill.

Yes. Of course. He’s training me. He’s training you. These long days where the scenery never changes. These long days putting one foot in front of the other. These long days with nothing ahead but a wall. These long days alone. When we’re sweating and exhausted and getting nowhere at all … we’re training.

We’re getting stronger. We’re building endurance. We’re learning not to quit.

The scenery may never change, but we’re changing.

That’s why we run on a treadmill. Why we do the duties each day, choosing to delight instead of despise, because we choose to believe He’s changing us as we are faithful in the small things each day.

Oh sister, I know the Sacred Mundane can be hard. There’s no adrenalin rush in the trenches of life. I know it’s not exhilarating to run on a treadmill, alone, staring at a wall and getting nowhere. Doing the duties no one else sees and at the end of the day looking around and wondering, All that work … for what?

For faithfulness.

Because God is watching, sister. Because God is training you for His glory. Building endurance, building character, growing some choice fruit that can only grow in the shade.

When the scenery never changes, keep running.

When no one’s there to cheer, keep running.

When all that’s ahead is that same bleak wall, keep running.

When it seems you’re getting nowhere, keep running.

Race Day may come and you’ll be ready. Opportunity may knock and you’ll open that door. But most importantly, a day will come when you hear the most glorious words,

“Well done; you have been faithful with little things. Enter into My joy.”

Keep running.

–

{Feel like you’re running hard and getting nowhere today? Please know your sisters here are cheering you on. How can we pray for you? Please let us know  … thanks for reading!}

From Kari Patterson, Sacred Mundane

I think my cell phone touch screen is worn slap out.

Time and time again, I find myself checking for email, Twitter mentions, and Facebook wall post. Proof of acceptance. Proof that someone is thinking of me. Proof that I’m OK.

My self-focus is like a rip tide supplanting my footing and sucking me into dangerous depths.

Soon, I find myself flailing in the murky, black waters where all I can think about is me, me, me. In those waters, everything I do and say is for personal gain. Service becomes self-promotion. Prayer becomes public display. Encouragement becomes eager fishing for approval.

Recently, as I lay in bed begging God to restore a friendship I never thought I’d lose, God spoke.

Lee, picture what your life would be like if you hungered for more of me as much as you hunger for human approval. I have so much more to give you. So much more. When will you stop this striving for the lesser thing?

My heart sank deep into the mattress as His words settled in.

What do I do, Lord?

In the quiet, I waited on Him.

With His finger, he traced His instructions on my heart.

• Take your “heart medicine” every morning. Let My Word regulate your heart to beat in rhythm with Mine.

“I gain understanding from your precepts; therefore I hate every wrong path. Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” (Psalm 119:104-105 NIV)

• Let Me renew your mind. Every time your thoughts stray toward human approval, call out to Me. Say My name. Sing My praises. Simply say, “Help!”

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (Romans 12:2 NIV)

• Trip up the tempter. The evil one knows human approval is a foothold he can use to paralyze you. He will continue to jab at you until you jab back. Every time you make the choice to focus on Me, a tiny piece of that foothold crumbles. Continued obedience destroys footholds, giving the evil one no place to stand.

“We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” (2 Corinthians 10:5 NIV)

• Hide My Word in your heart. Replace his lies with My truth. When the lies swoop through your heart like a garbage heap breeze, let My Spirit wind clear the air.

“I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.” (Psalm 119:10-11 NIV)

• Start now and don’t stop. It’s time to get stubborn. No more quitting when life gets hard. No more letting your guard down “just this once.” No more idols. I am Your God.

“Get rid of the vile images you have set your eyes on, and do not defile yourselves with the idols of Egypt. I am the LORD your God.” (Ezekiel 20:7 NIV)

Lord, I’m so sorry. So sorry I keep adding bricks to Satan’s foothold into my life. It’s time to tear that foothold down. Give me an insatiable craving for Your word and Your presence. Give me a hatred for my sin and a fierce determination to be holy. I can’t do it with sheer effort. I need Your power coursing through my mental, emotional, and spiritual muscles. Beef me up, Lord, for Your glory and my good. AMEN

By: LeeBird,  Prayer Gifts

“It never ceases to amaze me how good we are at hitting the bullseye on the wrong target.” – Food, Inc., Documentary

I’m sad to confess that I yell at my kids most often when I am trying to finish a p90x workout video in my bedroom. It seems that regardless of how occupied they all appear to be before I push play, they descend on my exercise time like locusts on a fall crop. Suddenly, I have my preschooler sitting on me while I’m trying to do push-ups, and I’m pressing pause faster than I can break a sweat.  The older two are fighting. My daughter needs help with the computer. My son can’t find a snack in the kitchen. And while the skinny people on the video are squatting and planking and tricep-pressing, I am an irritated mom who’s morphing into a she-version of the Incredible Hulk {but, considering the Hulk’s physique, maybe that would work in my favor, anyway}.

I just want 40 minutes to myself.  What is their problem?!  Why can’t I just have access to a gym and childcare?

And so, I get angry. And unfortunately for my kids, my angry-self  is even less attractive than my working-out-self, if you can imagine. There is stomping and verbal “arghs” and frequent words I have to apologize for later.

We had a friend tell us once that “anger is oftentimes the result of a blocked goal,” and I agree. Because my goal of fighting this slowing metabolism is typically blocked by the needs of my three young children. And the result from me is always, always, an angry, selfish one.

I recently picked up a copy of Neil Anderson’s book, Getting Anger Under Control, and it struck a chord on many levels. Anderson talks about the subtle but important difference between godly desires and godly goals. Anderson writes that a godly goal is anything that reflects God’s will for our lives and is not dependent on other people or circumstances, whereas a godly desire, while potentially good, as well, is dependent on others or circumstances. Anderson writes:

“If we believe that our identity and sense of worth is dependent upon the cooperation of other people and upon favorable circumstances, then we will likely try to control them. When we discover that we can’t, then those people or circumstances are blocking us from our goals, and we get angry. If any outcome we desire is uncertain, we feel anxious; and if our goal seems impossible to reach, we get depressed. . .

Even Godly desires will become a problem for us if we raise them to the level of goals.”

Anderson explains the difference between goals and desires with several examples, one of which is a woman at the checkout line of a grocery store in a hurry to get home. Her desire is to get in and out of the shop quickly, but the cashier is checking out the customer in front of her painfully slowly. While the rushing woman might have had a desire to accomplish her shopping in five minutes, the woman’s larger goal of demonstrating the character of Christ is not blocked by the slow cashier. The shopper can still choose patience and kindness, if her desire remains less important than her goal.

And, suddenly my p90x issues came into focus, because I had been elevating my desire for a workout above my goal to be a Christ-like woman. And it seemed a simple shift of semantics, but it was an important one for me, nonetheless.

Because the truth is that I have already been given everything I need for life and godliness {2 Peter 1:3}. Right now. At this moment. And my challenge is to remember that this goal of loving like Jesus is not blocked by kids that interrupt a workout video.

In fact, interrupting children could be just the catalyst I need to embrace it.

“God’s goal for our lives is to become the person He created us to be. Paul said, ‘This is the will of God, your sanctification’ {1 Thes. 4:3}. Nobody–nothing–on planet Earth can keep us from becoming the person God created us to be. The only ones who can interfere with that goal is ourselves.” – Neil Anderson, Getting Anger Under Control

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What desire do you typically elevate beyond the greater goal of loving like Christ?

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Laura Parker, a freelance writer, lives and blogs from Thailand, where her husband is involved in humanitarian work. You can read more about her life in SouthEast Asia at her blog, ALifeOverseas. You can follow her on twitter at @LauraParkerBlog.

“Your dad and I have never agreed about what your name is,” my mom teasingly mentioned last week as my dad over-enunciated my name, “Kath-er-ine.” My mom says it more simply “Kathe-rine” with just two syllables.

I find it funny that after 27 years my parents are still discussing how to pronounce my name. I’m not sure it matters, but sometimes the way we say words do matter, such as when we read the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5. When we say “bles-sed” as two separate syllables, we tend to think of an earned holiness or worthiness. So, when we read, “Bles-sed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven,” our temptation is to wonder how to force ourselves into a spirit of poverty because we want the promise that follows.

I’m not sure Jesus meant for this sermon to be an “if, then” prescriptive formula for us to follow, though. Perhaps Jesus meant for it to be a “when, then” descriptive message to assure us.

Try this: read Matthew 5 aloud, pronouncing “blessed” with one syllable. Does it change the meaning for you? It does for me. When you ask someone how they are and they say, “I’m blessed,” they don’t usually mean, “I am holy and worthy of honor,” but rather, “I have received something I don’t deserve.”

Why does this distinction matter? I do not earn or deserve any of the good consequences Christ mentions in this passage. I do not inherit the kingdom of heaven because I am poor in spirit. I receive the kingdom of heaven because God gives me good gifts I don’t deserve, and He gives them to me even when I am poor in spirit.

Oh how this comforts my soul. My charge as a Christ-follower is not to strive to make myself poor in spirit, or any of the states Jesus describes in Matthew 5. My charge is to believe Him that He offers me life – eternal and abundant – and all of His good gifts that go with it, no matter what. Thus, in whatever season I find myself, my heart can sing an “extension” of Romans 8:38-39…

For I am convinced that neither death nor life,
neither when we are poor in spirit nor when we are rich in spirit,
neither when we mourn nor when we rejoice,
neither when we are meekness nor when we are bold,
neither when we hunger and thirst for righteousness nor when walk in apathy,
neither when we are merciful nor when we are unrighteously harsh,
neither when we are pure in heart nor when we act out in our wicked flesh,
neither when we are peacemakers nor when we have conflict,
neither when we are persecuted because of righteousness nor when God gives us favor with man,
nor anything else in all creation,
will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

By: Katherine

Emotional Pain. It can be hard to know what to do when we are hurting.

Inundated with pain and sadness that makes us want to cry for hours, we feel lost and all alone. Our hearts become mangled beyond recognition.

One blow. A twinge of pain. Two blows. Excruciating pain. Three blows. The depths of despair!

Completely subjugated on a bed of affliction, we feel buried under a mound of mental anguish.

As Christians, we tend to feel guilty when we experience negative emotions.

That’s when we act in pretense and find the nearest rug to sweep our feelings under while telling ourselves, I can’t let anyone know I am hurting.  They will think I’m not a good Christian; that I don’t ‘have it altogether!’

As we repress our true feelings, the slightest provocation sets us off.  When they surface, we are shocked! Where did that come from, we wonder?

Comparing ourselves to others, especially the men in our lives, doesn’t work.  They are wired differently.  They compartmentalize their heartache and move on without a second thought.

As a woman, this method is foreign and far reaching.

Overcome with machine gun emotions pelting us from every side, we quickly retreat to our bedrooms with a box of Kleenexes. We cry until we have a sinus headache, our voices become nasally, and our eyes are bloodshot.

Finding out our teenager is on drugs. Our spouse betrays us by having an affair. Learning our unmarried daughter who is still a kid herself is expecting a baby.  A good friend we thought we could trust falsely accuses us. A business partner doesn’t uphold his or her end of the deal. Our spouse gambles away their paycheck leaving us without money to pay our rent. We read about an innocent child abused by a parent.

Pretending our emotions do not exist is not the answer.

We must deal with our feelings in a healthy manner. Talking about how we feel with a trusted friend or our spouse and praying about them is crucial. It’s okay to be honest and ask the Lord to help us work through the issue we are struggling with.

God created us to be emotional beings, but balance is key.

What do we do with all of the pain when it becomes unbearable, causing us to feel we can’t take another shard of glass? Stuff it?  Run from it? Pretend it doesn’t exist?

1.  Talk to the Lord about it in prayer!

2.  Share with a trusted friend, get their feedback, & pray together.

Our pain, when given to the Lord, is never wasted. It has a purpose. If we choose to embrace it, it will make us stronger and make us more like Jesus.

A stranger asked a Silversmith who was refining silver “How do you know the right amount of heat needed for the refining of the silver?”

He looked up and said, “When I can see my own reflection.”

The Lord refines us through pain and difficult circumstances for the purpose of eventually seeing His reflection in us.

Through it all, even our crazy emotions have a purpose.  They remind us we are frail human beings in need of the daily grace and strength of God.  As our trust in God increases, we come to realize, we are never alone…

He rides the waves of our raging emotions.  He knows what we are going through and He’s not afraid of our feelings!  After all, He’s the God of the Universe. Sometimes He calms the storm. Other times, He calms the child!

By: Carole McDuffee