When I was little I had a bible on the floor by my bed. I would pick it up, open the first page, and start to read. I didn’t understand it and before I even got to the second page the book was closed, laid gently back on my floor. And I prayed instead.
I talked to the God that I knew in my soul. I didn’t know His name. I didn’t know His theology (my parents weren’t Christians). I just knew.
When my sister was kidnapped by her father and I prayed that she would be found and she was. I knew.
When I cried out to the God in the song who the man was singing about, a God who healed and loved and forgave, I knew.
When I walked into a church filled with spirit and smiles and passion, I knew.
When I said I would hide from Jesus because I was unlovable, and then, in that moment, understood grace, I knew.
When I got on my knees with tear-stained face to the floor and bled my heart for help, and He showed me the why behind the pain, I knew.
When after 20 years my mother laid down the drink, I knew.
And when I found out His name, Jesus, and I felt Him in my very soul drenching me with undeserved grace and mercy, I knew… I would never be the same.
I am a first generation Christian.
I have the privilege and great responsibility to pass on the truth and grace of my God to my children…and to the world. I am so stunningly humbled.
And now, when I read my bible, it is no longer a book, it is the very authority and spoken Word of God; it comes alive before my eyes and cuts through bone to pierce heart.
He knew.
He knew me before I ever knew Him, and He knows you too.
If you are still in hiding, let Him find you today.
And let your soul rest in the knowledge of Jesus Christ.
By Sarah Mae, SarahMae.com
Leave a Comment
Kristen@Moms Sharpening Moms says
Oh, Sarah Mae! This is pure soul food. Awesomeness.
@nicolewick says
I think this is the best post of yours I have ever read. Wow. Thank you so much for sharing it.
Isla says
Wow – this is amazing. Thanks for sharing this!
Barbie says
This is wonderful. I too am a first generation Christian and like you, even though I had no background in being raised as a Christian, when He came, I knew Him. I feel so blessed that I get to pass on this legacy to those around me.
Lynne says
What a beautiful post and now I know what I am – a First Generation Christian.
The only sad part, for me, is that my daughter has so far been unable to feel Jesus in her life. She is grown up now and living a lifestyle that, while relatively normal for non-Christian girls her age, is one that is not bringing her joy.
Please pray for her.
Sarah Mae says
Lynne – I am praying for your sweet daughter right now…
Laura@Life Overseas says
What a powerful piece of honesty. It reminds me of the endless pursuit of this Jesus on behalf of His kids. It reminds me of His gentle whispers undergirding the loud noise that so often is our lives.
Thank you for choosing to pass on to future generations what was not passed on to you. And for using your voice and your writing to encourage other women to do the same.
From over the ocean, thank you.
Becky Crenshaw says
Oh my. What a great word. Stunning and solid. Thank you.
Suzann says
This is a wonderful wonderful post. It speaks to my soul. I became a Christian about 8 years ago, but we moved about 3 years ago and I’ve struggled with finding a church home here. I almost feel like I’m lost all over again. Thank you for speaking to my heart.
Jean Klinger says
Even when you are raised in a Christian home, you still have to walk your own journey…so many people are still on the ‘first page’ and they are not first generation Christians!!
The ‘knowing’ is the most important part and the rest just makes it all the sweeter!!
Thanks for being a confirmation to the messages I have been receiving!!
tiny twig says
i am also a first generation believer. it is an interesting and blessed road to walk. thanks for your viewpoint, as always!
Lea Culp says
Oh, what a testimony! Came over from Bar’s “A Freshly Brewed Life” and so glad I did. Blessings to another “sister in Christ.”
Kerry says
I really needed soul food today! As always beautiful written.
Shelli @ Hopefully Devoted says
This is beautiful, Sarah Mae. I, too, am a first generation Christian. I have since had the privilege of bringing my mom to Christ, along with my children. Perhaps we are part of the sandwich generation of the Jesus-kind.
Danielle says
Thanks so much for this post. It sounds exactly like my & my story. My parents were not Christians but I did have a child bible… that I would open & try to read every night. I would ask my mom to read with me, but she wouldn’t. And I knew. My whole life I knew. It wasn’t until I was 30 that I finally found HIM.
Thanks again for this post 🙂
Debbie says
What a beautiful testimony that is so encouraging! He loved you before you even knew His Name. Look at what He started with you. Now your family will be impacted for eternity.
Blessings and love,
Debbie
marla says
*tears running down my face* Isn’t he so beautiful, so awesome. Powerful words. May the Lord continue to bless you an guide you.
your sister in Christ
Lisa-Jo @thegypsymama says
I think this is the most beautiful piece I’ve ever read by you. Simple, elegant, raw, real, “drenched in grace” as you say.
Thank you for this gift.
christy says
I LOVE YOUR POSTS! they always touch my heart..thanks for sharing!
sara says
Im a new christian and have come across a lot of hassle from my family. I know the Lord is with us and holding us close. Taking courage from this post, thank you xxx
Sara Sophia says
To echo Lisa-Jo.
I really think this is your best work.
His Work.
To simply rest in Salvation.
Grace.
Amen.
<3 Sara Sophia
Angelia says
Thank you for sharing this Sarah Mae. Since I first found your blog, shortly after you began it. I always felt There was a kindred spirit there for me. When you write your heart in words, I see a reflection of personal thought,in many. I too am a first Generation Christian. Now a wife of a honorable man and mother to 3 children. A teen and two younger ones. I am pondering how not to get them sticky with my inner mess. I want them to truely know the Lord. Oh! The inner war with self, yet the passion and fire that Christ fills me with is greater. I have been praying that God fill my passion cup to do His Good will while “Today is called today” because being luke warm only fills me with more of self and less of Him, I get lost in my desires to follow, I flonder. The days are swift. I too must review the call He spoke in my youth, when I grew up in a non-christian home. I heard Him, He spoke to me, although I did not know what to do…He showed me along the way and has loving placed His finger prints in my daily life. Reviewing that fills the soul with His faithfulness and the passion I need to pursue His goodness. Thank you for turning my heart to look at that list of love.Smiles, Angelia in TX
Stacy says
This is just a wonderful word. Thank you.
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