I really had something else in mind to share with you, on this, my first (in)courage post. However, this thing called life had other plans, which really means that I once again told God my plans and He laughed. That is the running joke around our place: how do you make God laugh? Tell Him your plans!
I really wanted to kick back and tell you about our crazy, wonderful, blessed life. Cows, horses, rescue dogs, writing, photography, scrapbooking, homeschooling, working, loving and laughing.
But I am really struggling and in my struggles I’ve been having conversations with God that go something like this…
I say, Oh Lord, I feel stretched so thin, don’t I need to be stronger?
God reminds me that stretched thin lets His light shine through me.
I say, Oh Lord, my faith is full of holes and tears, I want to be more solid.
God reminds me that holes and tears let His light shine through me.
I say, Oh Lord, I feel so small and I am afraid!
God reminds me that in my smallness His grace is seen bigger.
God reminds me that I can rest on Him and leave my fears with Him.
I fear that my words will be lost in the noise of the our lives. Not that my words are important on their own, they are not. They are only important when God chooses to use them to share His love.
Forgetting that sometimes it is our tears and our fears that have the greatest story to tell for the ending is better than all the blockbusters combined. It is eternal, joyful and beautiful! It is us, tear stained and scarred and scared leaning on each other seeking the Son-light like a field of sunflowers seeking to follow the sun.
Forgetting that sometimes it is those very tears and fears that can show the grace and love of God best of all. Tears shed in frustration during struggles with family, wanting to find the words, to find your voice, small, medium and large sized challenges with work or children or spouses.
Wanting to share so much the blessings that make my life one of love, laughter and joy, I forgot that God also wants to use my scars, my fears and my struggles to show how He works in my life. I forgot that God can turn tears into rain to water seeds that fall on hard ground, on thorny ground, on rough ground.
I forgot that I am not alone, even when it feels like I’m full of holes, stretched too thin and much too small to be seen or heard. I forgot that by grace alone I am saved and that grace comes from a single Source.
Tonight I can go to bed, and I can pray with a thankful heart that I am not alone, that my holes are filled with God’s love, that even when I feel stretched too thin I am not alone, that God strengthens me for the tasks at hand. I can be thankful for being small. For in this world small doesn’t mean forgotten, it means when you feel forgotten by (wo)man, you are always remembered by God.
Suzann says
Awesome post!!! I needed to hear (read) that!!!
Shanyn says
Thank you Suzann for commenting, it is a blessing to have heard from you!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
I Live in an Antbed says
Beautiful! Thank you for being transparent. Thank you for allowing Him to direct your path.
Shanyn says
Thank you for your words, your comment it has blessed me – it was quite baring to write that post but God wouldn’t let me write anything else…and now I know why!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Karen says
Thank you, thank you, thank you! What a blessing!
Shanyn says
Thank you for commenting, your love is a blessing!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Linda from Manila says
Thank you, your post comes at the perfect time. The Lord never forgets…He sees you and me, the high and lows in between.
Shanyn says
Thanks Linda for your comment, it is a blessing to have shared with you.
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
sara says
I as so relieved that God loves us at all times, even when we are shouting at him. I am struggling at the moment with so many emotions and find myself on my knees asking why why. Yet i know in my heart God has a purpose for me i have to be patient.
Shanyn says
Sara! I’m holding you close in prayer – I know that feeling and am relieved that God loves us always and in all ways. God does have a purpose, even when we cannot sense or see it. Bright blessings and many prayers,
Shanyn
Karen Swim says
Amen! This was such a blessing to read, thank you so much for allowing His light to shine through you.
Shanyn says
Karen, thank you! I felt so cloudy today and your comment and the others let me feel some sunshine! What a blessing!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Nan Fisk says
Excellent! Thanks for being obedient to the Spirit’s leading … your well chosen words arrived right on time in my life. I so needed this word of confirmation and encouragment this week. A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. ~ Proverbs 25:11 NIV
Shanyn says
Nan, thank you for your comment and the blessing of your words. They touched me today, and I’m so thankful for that!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
donna says
Thanks so much for posting this. It spoke to me and I also shared it with my girlfriends. I hope God continues to speak through you. You sure do have a way with words. Have a blessed day.
Shanyn says
Donna, thank you for your comment and for sharing. Your words were a soothing blessing for me today – thanks for that!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Holley Gerth says
“Our holes are filled with God’s love”…my heart let out a sigh of relief at that one, girl. And I will look at the “holey” autumn leaves around me differently this year! I’m glad you decided to share what was on your heart.
Shanyn says
Thanks Holley, your words have given me those sighs as well, and I’m so pleased to have been able to share. Thanks for commenting!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
tiffany says
so beautiful and so true! I love it when i read something and it totally changes my way of thinking and gives me new persepective!
today I am delighting in Him for all that I am not so that His light will shine brighter within me! For I believe its the God in us that makes us all so special.
xoTiffany
Shanyn says
Tiffany, thank you for your comment, it blessed me today with encouragement. I agree, it is God in us that makes us special!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Reese says
Shanyn, you have skillz. Thank you for blessing my day via your God-given words. Bravo.
xo
Reese
Shanyn says
Thank you Reese, for blessing me with your comment and love. Praying for you.
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Grandma Patty Ann says
I too make God laugh with my plans 🙂 Such a blessing to met you when I needed to! I am in a struggle and asking God to direct me. I am thinking that if I do not feel the answer? That may be the answer.
I loved your post and want to visit your site as we just rescued 2 puppy mill mommas.
Love to you and yours! Grandma Patty Ann
Shanyn says
I feel that way too, that sometimes the answer isn’t always a “yes” or a “No” but a “not yet” or “Wait” and then the answer may be no answer at all.
Bless you for rescuing two puppy mill mama’s! I’d love to hear their story.
Thanks for taking the time to bless me with your comment.
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Gailanne says
Shanyn, I thank God you’re so “holey”, it sure lets His light shine bright!
For whatever reason you wrote this, instead of what you intended…
thank you. Stay “holey” and blessed!
Shanyn says
Gailanne, thank you for the blessing of your words…
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Jolene says
Thanks for a beautiful post! I used to have that “make God laugh” quote printed and stuck up on the wall by my desk. My own plans have turned out to be pretty laughable time and time again. Praise God!
Shanyn says
Jolene, I’m so glad God has a wonderful sense of humor – and I’m so blessed to hear from sisters like yourself that see that as well! Bright blessings, Shanyn
Beth says
Thank you for the reminder that God can use even me, the one who is weak, inadequate, and so not up to what I think He needs me to be. His will is done in spite of me, and when I am weak, then He is strong. I needed to hear your words today so much that they brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for letting yourself be used and led in the way He wanted to use you! Blessings to you.
Shanyn says
Beth – your words touched me so deeply! “so not up to what I think He needs me to be” really hit me straight on…your words were what I needed…thank you! Bright blessings, Shanyn
Robin says
Thin, holey and small. Makes me think of several closest to Jesus during His 3 years of ministry…and those He ministered too. Sounds pretty familiar closer to home too! 🙂
Thank you for sharing–
Robin
Shanyn says
Robin, thank you! Your comment has given me food for both thought and prayer…be brightly blessed!
Shanyn
Bernadette says
Thank you so much for writing this. It touched my heart. I was unable to sleep because my fears woke me up. I think I can rest now that I know I am not alone. God has a way of making all things right. I am so thankful.
Love, Bernadette
Shanyn says
Bernadette, praying for you that you can rest with God’s angels over you and with God’s loving care in your heart. Our fears keep us lonely, and when we give them to God we are open to being embraced and not alone…God has a wonderful way of making things right. I’m praying you’ve been able to rest in Him and let your fears go to the One who handles them best!
Bright blessings,
Shanyn
Shanyn says
Thanks for your comment, and yes Strawberry Roan has some new posts! Would love to see you over there! http://strawberryroan.blogspot.com Bright blessings!
Thomas Sabo Jewellery says
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