Sarah Mae
About the Author

Sarah Mae has a past that would be her present if it weren’t for Jesus. A blogger, author, and co-author of Desperate: Hope for the Mom Who Needs to Breathe, she’s currently writing The Complicated Heart, a book for broken-hearted lovers of Jesus. Learn more at @thecomplicatedheart on Instagram or...

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things we love
& you will too!
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  1. I struggle with getting dressed because I hate all of my clothes.

    I do, however, adore the shoes in the picture in this post. Where did you get them?

  2. I struggle to get dressed in the morning because my fiance is used to being in PJ’s all day and he thinks it’s just easier, he says he thinks I’m weird if I do get dressed even though I don’t have anything special to do during the day.

  3. I struggle with getting dressed in the morning because I don’t feel cute in many of my tops!

  4. I struggle because I don’t really talk, so if it is a t-shirt day I want my t-shirt to share something I would want to talk about….with the pressure to choose the ‘right’ shirt for the day it’s easier to just wear the falling apart shirts that I pretty much know are wrong so that the ‘right’ shirt is still clean when I figure out which one it is…

  5. Hello. I beyond struggle to get really dressed at all during the day. In a home with 6 children 17, 14, 11, 4, 2, 1 and pregnant with #7…I feel as though I never have time. My husband is gone to Louisiana for almost 3 weeks (he just left) and I get up earlier and earlier to exercise and get morning chores done, before the littles get up and chaos ensues…I am lucky if I can shower…This is such a struggle for me, along with just listening to God. How can others hear him and I can’t?

    alizabeth

    • I just want to say a blessing over you; Lord, hold and love your precious daughter of God, alizabeth. Touch her heart in a way no One else can. Care for her as she cares for her family. Be her husband and the Father they need while their earthly dad is away, and supply all her needs, even above and beyond, to overflowing. In Jesus’ Name, amen.

    • Because I don’t see myself through God’s eyes, in a nutshell.

      Alizabeth… I LOVE your name. It’s the first time I’ve ever heard it and I would LOVE for my daughter, Audie Elizabeth, to name her daughter Alizabeth (I think it would be the perfect combination of her first and middle names). SO Pretty! Blessings to you and your family!

    • I can relate to you, my friend. I have ten kids ages 10 months to 20 years. Some days are just plane hard, but I will tell you that it does get easier.. I pray God lifts your spirit today. You are not alone.

  6. I struggle with getting out of comfy clothes…like sweats and whatever. I want to look more put together, but don’t want to spend a lot of $$

    • Kiera,

      A couple of suggestions for getting nice clothes without spending a lot of $$–garage sales. I have found some really cute outfits at garage sales. My other idea is GoodWill. Seriously GoodWill has used handme down clothes.

      I truly don’t mind hand me down clothes. I have closets full of nice dressy clothes given to me by others who have outgrown them, or bought at garage sales or Good will.

      Try it!

      • Beth, I love second-hand/thrift stores! I find beautiful things (right now, I only shop for my children, but I need to go for me one day soon). And you are helping someone when you buy them.

  7. I just find that I am personally more productive when I get up and just keep moving. I don’t like taking time for myself until I have to. Plus, I like to clean & then shower when I’m done =o)

  8. I struggle to get dressed everyday because most of my clothes are from before I had kids and are more “business” type clothes. I really like my comfy sweats and t-shirts but would like to learn how to dress “comfy cute” as I call it!

  9. I struggle because a a a stay at home mom it seems silly to get “dressed up”, but I do not like hanging out in bummy clothes all day either! Thankful God does not care how we look!

  10. I would love to have a copy. I am having a baby in two days an need to get back in the habit of dressing up again!

  11. I struggle to get dressed because I have gained weight due to a knee injury and just don’t feel good in my own skin anymore.

  12. because I :

    1. don’t feel like it – my jammies are so comfy
    2. feel pressured to get downstairs and feed the dogs
    3. don’t have any nice “casual” clothes
    4. don’t have the $$ to buy any

  13. I struggle to get dressed because I like to get up and have my coffee while I spend time with the LORD…then it always seems that children get up, the morning kicks into gear and it becomes an inconvenience to stop, shower and dress. I must say that I feel WAY more productive when I DO get up, shower and dress first thing!

  14. I struggle getting dressed some days because for so many years I’ve HAD to get up and get dressed and out of the house. Now, I still need to get up and dressed but I wait until the last minute to do so because I just want to be home with my family, making meals, or doing the things I like to do at an easy pace instead of frantically on the weekends. So my rebellious heart waits till the last second to get dressed and then I will pull on my standard jeans and top.

    • Your heart doesn’t sound rebellious. It is a GOOD thing to want to be home with your family blessing them with meals and all those things you love to do for them.

  15. Okay this made me cry….somehow the Lord has my heart so tender today that I can’t seem to pray anything or read anything without shedding some tears. And that’s ok. But these assurances – that I’m already okay, I’ve already made it in God’s eyes – are amazing to me.

    This is what I need to post everywhere I look today – “This means that you don’t have to get there. You are there (in Heaven’s eyes). It means that you are not your sin. You are not the bad decision you made yesterday. You are not the stupid thing you said today. You don’t have to be beautiful or smart or funny or good enough; you just have to let God mold you as He sees fit to make you more like Jesus. Accept the molding. Don’t strive or try harder; just offer yourself to Him daily.”

    I have begun offering myself to Him daily – so we’ll see where this goes.

    Thank you, Sarah, for your gift of words this morning!

    • (((Christina))) He made you, all of us, Beautiful…we are in His eyes. Yes, I hate seeing myself lately too. It’s the lies of the enemy. Let’s all hold each other’s hands and fight against those lies! Just so you know you are not alone. My tears won’t stop either…Praying for all here today.

  16. I struggle with getting dressed because it is hard to find clothes that fit or aren’t out of style in my wardrobe. I have a hard time finding stylish clothes on my budget.

    • I don’t know if this will help, Brenda. I am not doing it now, only because of depression, but even when I was in my 20s and 30s, I loved to shop at the Goodwill and what we have here is Savers. Also Catholic Charities, the Deseret stores (LDS), or the Salavation Army stores. I always kept in mind designer brands I loved, or a look I was going for (vintage in my 20s!), and so I found wonderful, affordable items, put a fantastic wardrobe together, and even work suits. No one ever imagined my clothing was second-hand! If you can find one or a few of these stores, they even have discount days or club cards. I wish you and all the ladies here blessings and grace and favor in getting dressed as the daughters of God we all are!

  17. On my off days I sometimes don’t get dressed ’cause I like how I feel in comfy clothes–sweats & T-shirt. Also working in the medical field I don’t get “dressy” for work–so why bother at home.

    I will get spruced up for church on Sundays so my hubby can see me all nice & pretty!

  18. Oh I didn’t even see the question we were supposed to answer…I was too busy sniffling back the tears from what I’d just read! Ok, I’m more composed now and can answer the actual question….. I struggle with getting dressed in the morning because I work full time all during the school year (at a school) and now that I’m home on summer vacation and I don’t need to get up and out the door, I prefer to lounge and do my housework in sweats. I used to not want to get dressed because I had gained weight and hated the way I looked in everything – my morning good mood stopped as soon as I had to put on real clothes. Fortunately, that’s all changing because of eating better and a gym membership! So at least now it’s rather fun to pull some used-to-be-too-small-clothes out of my closet and get dressed, when I absolutely must.

  19. I took an early retirement in order to care for my mother-in-law. I’m still struggling to find some order to my days – – feeling a little lost. Besides the fact I’ve gained some weight these last few months, I tend to feel no point in dressing up because no one sees me and all I do is clean and/or cook. When my husband comes home each evening I am embarrassed at my appearance. I seriously need to get my act together in this area!

  20. Well, for the time being I struggle with my body shape right now. I just had a baby the beginning of May. I know, I tell myself it took 9 months to put it on…but its still that nagging thought when I look in the mirror of “ugh, still can’t get my pants buttoned. Will I ever be back this size?”

  21. I struggle to dress in the morning because I have a work at home job, and I can get by with staying in my jammies at my desk & PC. But it is so incredibly embarrassing if I’m caught like that at 2 pm! Regardless of how much work I accomplished! I want to and need to change, but I’m somewhat stuck in a rut!

  22. I struggle with getting dressed in the morning because I feel my present wardrobe does not reflect who I am, my spirit. I only wish I had the money to invest in clothes that show people and myself how I really feel and not what I have holded onto.

  23. I struggle to get dressed in the morning because right now all my clothes are A little tight so it is discouraging! I love my clothes but my body needs some attention.

  24. I like to get up and start doing things. It’s hard for me to stop and find 20-30 minutes to shower and get dressed in real clothes once the kids are up too.

  25. I struggle simply because I’ve come to the place of wanting everything I do to represent God. Not a holier than thou thing …just being aware of what others see
    when they see me. Simple things like…is the top too low? Is the dress too short?
    I always try to keep up with the current styles but now I’m keeping a better eye on what is going to glorify the God who made me.
    Ditto on the pumps…love them!!

  26. I struggle with getting dressed because I am a widow and it is just me and I work from home…………..but I should get dressed just like I was working out of the home.

  27. The time it takes to do it! Most days I am just quick to pull the hair up in pony tail, throw in some shorts and flip flops and race out the door.

  28. I sometimes struggle with being an attractive person, on the inside and the outside.

    • Me, too, Lucy, me too. Hugs and may God also bless you and help us both see our worth in Him.

  29. The number one reason I struggle with getting dressed in the morning is because I love comfort… I love being in sweatpants/pajama pants. I love not having to wear a bra *shhh I’m not the only one, right?* Jeans and bras are just uncomfortable, and I only wear them when I “have to.” I’m excited to read your e-book and see what you have to say… because I definitely do feel like I’m more productive when I’m actually dressed appropriately (for if someone knocked on the door… goodness that’s what my worry is every day – even right now!! — that’s motivation for me to get dressed… or at least to put a “comfortable” bra on and gym pants 😉 I think I’ve shared enough of my thoughts for now! lol!)

  30. I struggle because I have lots of comfortable clothes. Being a mom of three boys, teaching fourth graders, and working in the church nursery, I have to be comfortable. Then when it comes to “getting dressed up,” I am uncomfortable! I don’t want to show off too much skin. I am still wearing some baby weight from three pregnancies. I know I will get drooled on, pulled and tugged on, and clean up multiple gross messes throughout the day. Comfy clothes are just usually the way to go.

  31. I guess I’m a frump because I just don’t feel attractive anymore. At all. When I met my husband 6 yrs. ago, I had long hair down to the middle of my back. I was slim. I was confident. I always got told I look 10 yrs. younger than I did. And for some reason, I hate to say this, but being married makes me feel ugly. It’s not entirely my husband’s fault. He says he loves me often. He compliments me (when I look bad, but when I try to look nice, he doesn’t notice, but that’s all men, I know…lol), but I just don’t feel strong and independent and spontaneous in this marriage. I cut my own hair all off. Yeah, it looks terrible, but in some ways it’s freeing. Going to go get it “fixed” when I have some extra cash. I got rid of or tore up all my “going out” clothing. All I have are sweats and workout tops. I didn’t feel like that person anymore, so why dress like her? I don’t wear anything but tennies and the one pair of flip flops I own. I spend any extra cash on the kids, so they won’t do without. It’s silly, it’s not godly, it’s not right, but I can’t climb out of this funk. I don’t feel worthy and I don’t like who I turned into.

  32. I struggle to get dressed in the morning b/c its simple…..I LOVE wearing my jammies all day! Comfort!! 🙂

    Thanks for the encouraging words today!
    Niki

  33. I would never leave my house if it were not for my children, husband and some very dear friends. I fear what I may encounter and that I will not be dressed “appropriately”. There have been many invitations for get-togethers that I have turned down. I have to plan ahead to allow myself time of prayer to mentally prepare myself for journeys as small as the grocery or a friends home. I wish I could say I love living in my pjs. The truth is I love the cocoon of my home.

  34. A great question, I personally struggle with getting dressed is because I am so exhausted. I homeschool 5 girls, ages 9-1. They are amazing, but this season of life is definitely chaotic! Iam still getting up I the night to help someone, my quiet times are non-existent, if I want to pray, it starts and ends with”Dear God.” If I did actually finish my prayer, there would be more confession of guilt than thankfulness . This would be an amazing book to read and get motivated and encouraged. Thanks for the chance.

    Katheryn
    http://www.outoftheboring.com

  35. I feel guilty if I do dress up around certain people because of their beliefs … Even though I don’t believe as they do …Because I know I’m saved by HIS GRACE ALONE.. there’s nothing I can add to the cross by doing or not doing certain things when it comes to my appearance … I guess I struggle with where to draw the line of being who I am .. Looking forward to reading your book!

  36. I struggle because I’m not loving the clothes in my closet or the body they’re going on right now.

  37. I struggle with getting dressed because my mind knows as soon as i get finished, the stress, juggling, decisions, non-organizational hassle of day awaits in my next step!

  38. I have no idea how to put an outfit together because no matter what I try, I feel ugly.

    I’m so excited for this book! I can’t wait to read it 🙂

  39. I struggle with outfits because I am a working mother with an infant and toddler. It has to be professional…but also comfy while I’m getting my body back and toddler proof to get out the door inbetween filling up sippy cups, sloppy kisses, and diaper changes. Somedays I do go through a few outfits. I also have a large button up shirt of my husbands that I wear over my outfits until I’m in the car and after I’ve dropped toddler off at daycare I’ll take it off, fresh to go to work! 🙂

  40. I struggle with my “shape”, am I pretty, and just dressing to make myself start my day! Grateful for GRACE!

  41. I struggle with what will make me “feel” pretty and feel comfortable. My wardrobe seems to be shrinking and my waistline has been growing, so it seems my choices become less and less. I feel like I wear the same thing over and over, and struggle with the fact that it should bother me at .

  42. I struggle to get dressed everyday because it is hard to find nice clothes that are compatible with nursing a baby. And I hate spending money…lol

  43. I struggle with getting dressed in the morning because nothing fits comfortably anymore.

  44. well, I guess you could say because it’s more comfy to stay in my pjs or whatever’s comfy when I don’t have to really go anywhere 🙂 other times, I just dress for comfort…yep, that about sums it up :/

  45. I struggle to get dressed in the morning because it doesn’t make much sense most days. Seriously girls, its just another outfit I’ll have to add to my ever growing loads of laundry! HA! But I think the real reason I struggle is because I spend most days very put together, makeup on (yes, sadly even when I go to the gym), dressed cute, etc. . . I just want a day OFF! To peel away the layers and just be me.

  46. My greatest struggle is finding something in my closet that 1) fits me, 2) is fairly comfortable and yet 3) is acceptable to wear to work.

  47. My children wake lots during the night, so I’d rather have extra time in bed than spend that it deciding what to wear!

  48. I struggle to get dressed in the morning because I seldom place myself on the priority list and getting dressed and pretty would take time away from “important” things. I need a serious attitude adjustment. Not to mention, I’ve had the same clothes since HS. Can we say “What Not to Wear?”

  49. I struggle with having to get up so early in the morning. But I do like dressing up and feeling attractive to go to work. The extra effort is worth it to me and I appreciate when people compliment me on what I’m wearing. It also makes me appreciate my jeans/t-shirts days and putting on my pj’s when I get home at night.

  50. I struggle with it because I always want to get everyone else ready first, and maybe if I feel like getting dressed after that, I will.

  51. Even though I get dressed for work every morning I dress very casual. I have very limited clothes and even though I would love to dress nice, I am a single mom and my small clothing budget goes to my daughter. So my clothes have to last years and many wears.

  52. I am overweight and I don’t have pretty clothes that fit. If I go out to eat, all I seem to do is spill things on my self made shelf (chest). I have had several foot surgeries so I can’t wear real shoes. I wear tennis shoes or slip-ons because I can’t wear heels of any kind. I don’t feel attractive. I feel people judge me by the way I look so what difference does it make if I have on nice clothes if I’m still fat and ugly. I don’t have the skills to put stuff together. I never learned how to put on make-up. It doesn’t match if you get all dressed up and you have no make-up on. I try to treat my clothes if I spill something on my front and sometimes it comes out and sometimes it doesn’t so I haven’t lost anything if it doesn’t come out. I don’t even shave my legs most of the time, too. I hate to even get in the bathtub. It is too much effort to get out of the bathtub. I am trying to exercise. I don’t know if it is helping my waistline or weight but it does help keep me from being so depressed.

  53. I struggle because no mattter how cute the clothes may be, on me they just don’t look the way I want… I’m overweight and I like my clothes to look a little loose, but not baggy, form fitting but not tight to show every roll around my tummy…. Skirts not long but not above my knees… I like my clothes to look well and make me look better than how I feel… which lately, has been just horrible… Reading and hearing today’s post gave me lots to consider and I’m encouraged to remind myself of who I am and not be so concerned with my outward appearance but more concerned on how I am inside… for ultimately it’s showing on the outside anyway….

    • That IS a lie from the devil. You ARE beautiful !! Walk in the confidence of who you are in Christ! You are a royal princess clothed with his love. Shine with His brightness as a poke in the devil’s eye!!

  54. It is so easy in a hot, humid climate (where I know I’m going to be drenched in sweat in 1/2 hour) to stay in one set of clothes that can then be washed (instead of several, which won’t dry fast anyway). If I don’t think anyone will see me, sometimes I work around the house all morning before changing to go out.

  55. This is easy – every morning when I have to get dressed I look in the mirror at my growing belly and I turn my head away. See, I being a tall slender gal all my life, and really never having a belly even after having 4 children see what is out of my control – yeah, my control!! Now, due to my liver disease & enlarged spleen (and maybe having lymphoma) I have this belly to beat all belly’s. So, my pants are tight around the abdomen, but loose around the rear & thighs, looks like I have a spare tire with me all the time, and I look horrible (to me). Do I look horrible to my GOD, to my hubby of soon to be 33 years – heck no. So, why am I so critical when I know the reason behind the belly? I sometimes feel like putting on a “tent dress” and calling it a day in a dark room somewhere.

  56. With 3 kids under 4 years old and the youngest being a nursing baby…it seems to be almost impossible to get up and get myself ready before the kids get up and all need me.

  57. Thank you so much for this post! I love it and the latest one. What you said – that I am not my sin, not the stupid thing that I said today – but in Jesus Christ, innocent, holy, beloved, held, established, is exactly what I’ve been learning. Thank you for the reminder that I am free and can be who I wannabe!

    Lots of love,
    Jess

  58. Strangely I don’t struggle with getting dressed because I hate to feel like a slouch and I want to delight my husband’s eyes. So maybe you won’t post this comment, but I was reading all the comments and WOW!! This is a common struggle. I just want to hug each one of the moms that commented and tell them that THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL and fearfully and wonderfully made!!! Thank you for writing from Frumps to Pumps. You have struck a chord with many moms.

  59. I struggle with getting dressed most mornings because I don’t shop for myself very often-usually just a couple times a year. I have fun shopping & dressing my children, but I dont feel that I NEED clothes so I continue to wear the same clothes that I’ve had for 10 years (and don’t really like or feel good in anymore). Garage sales are a good idea but seem like a lot of work?

    • Forever 21 has a WIDE variety of styles and sizes. They are running a buy one get one free plus 30% off right now. I just bought a dress and a shirt and the total was under ten dollars. I don’t know how long the sale will last, but they always have great prices.

  60. Over the last 18 months, I lost and regained 40 lbs. At my low end, I gave away all of my “fat” clothes, so now…nothing fits. There are so many reasons why I regained the weight. As I work at losing it, AGAIN, I struggle to even bother getting dressed. The jammies are just too comfy!

  61. My 10 month old, 2 year old & almost 4 year old. Need I say more? “mommy tired”

  62. The number one reason that I struggle to get dressed in the morning is because my husband is gone most of the day (10 hrs) and I don’t see other people that much. When I do get dressed us to go out I feel like a totally different person … happier, more productive, like a grown up instead of a kid again.

    I would love to win your book and work on this lacking area of my life.

    Thanks,
    Kristy

  63. i struggle with getting dressed in the morning at times because i don’t feel like my body is good enough so if i can find something to wear that hides my breast that hang a bit lower than i prefer or my belly that is to big to dig then i feel a bit better but then i look in the mirror and think ‘hummph how long will it take to look better and feel better in my own skin’.

    anyway i know the battle is won in Victory just have to walk in it daily.
    #frumps2pumps

  64. I struggle getting dressed every morning because I don’t know what to wear that makes me look good. I feel like it all makes me look fat. and I try to dress according to the weather so that I may be comfortable all day.

  65. Being an at home mom, it seems silly to dress up for a trip to the grocery store or risk ruining something nice while I prep food or keep house. Marked down t shirts,shorts and jeans are my staple.

  66. Struggling to get dressed in the morning can be as difficult as dealing with a stubborn child who is not listening. I tell myself why bother getting dressed when we are only going to be at home and we don’t have obligations that take us elsewhere. Miss. Image also comes forth and tells me I don’t meet todays standard of what all women are to look like in size compared to the magazine cover pages. My Dad told me when I was a young girl, that as time passes, our bodies change and we may not like it. But our mind remains the same. It stays intact, it doesn’t fall out, it doesn’t get bigger in size, but it’s thinking capability is the same for a 80yr old as it is for 40yr old for a healthy person. As much as sometimes I don’t care for my Miss. Image interupting my morning…I must remember, using this aging 40+ brain, that God made me who I am, the way He wanted me to be, with scars and curves. I must also continually tell myself get showered and dressed even if I’m going to be home, it will make me feel better. If you answered your door and it was God, would you really want to meet him in your pajama’s?

  67. I think I’m too comfortable in my “morning clothes” – if I don’t have to be somewhere, I’m able to stay home and play with my grandkids- easy to do in frumpy clothes!!

  68. I don’t struggle as much as I used to because having lived in a hot, humid developing country as a missionary for ten years God taught me to have the right perspective on what I wear everyday but I do still get stuck in the trap of caring too much and not being content with what I find in my closet.

  69. I think mostly because I’m depressed because I can’t seem to get myself motivated to lose weight- hate my body!

  70. I struggle each morning because my wardrobe doesn’t reflect my mood or my inner self.

  71. It’s hard to find nice clothes to nurse in. I also have a “mummy tummy” which makes finding clothes that look nice without wearing a support garment (too hot!) almost impossible.

  72. i struggle with not feeling dressed up enough for my job and with dressing for work and all of the running around i do after work.

  73. I don’t like dressing professional and doing the whole dress and hosiery thing as I’m quite uncomfortable in such tight, hugging clothing! Would rather go to work in slippers and shorts! Such a struggle to get going and moving in the morning!

  74. i struggle because i never ‘learned’ how to play the girly-girl……..i want to look like fun, but don’t know where to start…..

  75. I struggle because Im having a hard time accepting that I gained too much this last pregnancy… I’ve never weighed this much in my whole life..and am pretty depressed about it. It’s hard to want to get dressed at all.

  76. I hate waking up at the crack of dawn only to put on professional tight clothing! Any sort of helpful encouraging motivation would be kindly appreciated! 🙂

  77. I struggle with getting dressed because it’s all the same, t-shirt and jeans/capris. Nothing new, nothing exciting.

  78. I struggle getting dressed in the morning because nothing seems quite right. I feel like such a mess, inadequate, incompetent, out-of-place, and that is not just my clothes. Beyond my outer packaging, which is a continual mess, internally I am restless, hurting and tired. I would love to have an inspirational and uplifting book to help me on my journey.

  79. I struggle to get dressed because I just like to be comfy and my frumpy clothes are the most comfortable.

  80. I struggle getting dressed because I’ve gained weight and nothing fits. And I refuse to buy bigger clothes, well can’t afford bigger clothes really.

  81. I wear scrubs all day. Work full-time and feel like weekends fly by. I don’t wear my “regular” clothes very often. When I do it is a special treat and I struggle sometimes to do it because I feel pulled into too many directions and don’t want to leave the house having been gone so much during the week. I miss my beautiful children and this new lifesytle of full-time employment that came about unexpectedly. Blessed to have this job, but working in scrubs all day makes you forget what real clothes are like.

  82. I sweat a lot so I tend to just wear “coolest” (not stuffy) choice I’ve got no matter how it looks, which means I wear the same thing over and over! It’s kinda boring.

  83. I was a winner with comment #94 and haven’t gotten an email about it! Just wondering….

    🙂