Dear friends who build benches –
You are the brave ones, the ones who see a need and slide over to make room for your sister. You bring cupcakes and coffee and invite others in with a warm smile. You choose not to wait to be invited before building community. You look out your window and feel God nudging you to be the one – the one who invites, encourages, welcomes, because the woman down the street? On Twitter? Faithfully leaving comments on your blog? You’ve been where she is and you want to offer her a safe place to sit down, take a deep breath, and feel free to be herself.
The (in)courager leaders? They are bench builders. They welcome strangers from around the world into small group community. They plan, check in, pray over, cheer with, and love on. They are the women who hold open the doors and make room for one more. They stand aside and watch in awe as God shows up and does a good work.
Here are some of their own words, from our last session:
- This group was amazing in so many ways. During this past session we had many tragedies that affected our group. As a result we bonded stronger than ever as prayer warriors, bombarding Heaven in behalf of our sister(s) who were struggling. We shared concerns and praises. We are a very strong group! Thank you, Lord!
- It’s been so beautiful to come together with women struggling with infertility (and those who have experienced it in the past) and pray, share our hearts, have a safe place among women. THANK YOU for opening this group–community can be hard for any woman, but infertile women can feel especially lost and isolated. Thank you for creating a space for us to come together.
- I love this. So much. It has helped me be brave enough to connect deeply with women in real life. To share my own hauntings and be a safe place for others struggling to survive each day as a mum.
- I am so thankful God encouraged me to go another round and stick with this community thing. He blessed me and taught me so much this time around. This group has been amazing and such a needed thing for pastor’s wives. It has truly been a place of exhortation and praise and I am so so thankful for that. God has shown up!
And to you, the bench-seekers? You are the brave ones. The ones who have not given up on community. You who hold onto the hope that there is a place for you, somewhere you can be yourself – exactly as God created you. You trust that God will answer your prayer for women who know what it’s like to walk THIS road – your road – and you search for them. You connect with a new friend on Twitter, follow a few Facebook pages, and leave blog comments faithfully, hoping to connect with like-minded sisters.
These are comments from some women – just like you – who found their bench with (in)couragers:
- It’s a great community where I can share with people who get where I am coming from. We are aligned in experience AND faith, which makes it a lot easier to get great advice, and prayer!
- The women in this group supported each other through prayer and art and conversation. I feel as though I have made RL friends even though I haven’t met any of them (except for one) in person…Β I like the fact that each group is welcoming and nurturing–ready with a prayer and a pat on the back or a virtual hand held.
- As a somewhat new blogger/writer, the group encouraged me to have more confidence in myself as a writer. They also shared so much information on improving the skill. I felt so blessed to be a part of the group…many new friendships were made.
- I felt included! I felt like the other ladies knew exactly what I was going through, my struggles, my joys, in a way that others just can’t. It feels difficult to meet and make time to get to know other special needs moms, but to find a whole group of them, and also to share the same faith… It gave me so much peace to know that I am not alone, although physically I am not with them, I felt their strength and courage and it made me feel stronger and more courageous.
This summer? Whether you’re a bench builder, bench seeker, or just in need of a fun and encouraging place to connect with some friends, you’re invited to join us at the (in)courager Facebook page. We’ll be joining with the Bloom book club, kicking back, making new friends, and getting ready for our fall small group session. You can find more details on the Find Friends page!
We can’t wait to see you – we have a spot saved just for you.
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I have soooo enjoyed getting to know other writers and women of faith through (in)courage! I was not able to get together (in person) with others at this last group/in home meeting, but you can bet I will be on the list for the fall. Thank you so much for the encouragement that you provide me with every day as both a woman and a writer. We ALL need encouragent, no matter what our dream is. Thank you for being a place where we can be real and be accepted!
Blessings,
Bev
Oh we’re so glad you feel that way Bev!
I have soooo enjoyed getting to know other writers and women of faith through (in)courage! I was not able to get together (in person) with others at this last group/in home meeting, but you can bet I will be on the list for the fall. Thank you so much for the encouragement that you provide me with every day as both a woman and a writer. We ALL need encouragent, no matter what our dream is. Thank you for being a place where we can be real and be accepted!
Blessings,
Bev
Oh we’re so glad you feel that way Bev!
Amen! Our group at in.courage global care is here to be a voice for those who can’t speak loudly because of where they live – sometimes in dangerous places around the world… And to encourage this mommas who have seen their babies grow up and fly to the ends of the earth… And for those, like me, that want them to know that they aren’t forgotten, that we love them and miss them and will remember to pray!
Sometimes it feels like whispering in the wind, speaking (in)couraging words into the unknown, but I remember when my baby moved off to another land, and that they will again soon enough, and how much it helped to know that OnE Mom knew what it was like, and could relate.
We are that one for the 40+ women in our group, that sent their kids and grandkids, that live in a foreign land, that miss seeing loved ones on holidays (or church days)…
Loving through the empty benches of life in missions….
Marina, the work you do with your group is so incredibly special. Love seeing the world-wide impact you’ve been able to have, supporting women who travel this special road.
Marina, the work you do with your group is so incredibly special. Love seeing the world-wide impact you’ve been able to have, supporting women who travel this special road.
Yes! I have been so blessed to co-lead one of the working mom’s groups. Motherhood can be so lonely sometimes, especially when you have little time for playdates or trips to the park. Like so many others have said — this group has helped me to know that I’m not alone in my struggles. What a gift it’s been to pray, laugh, share, and love with these ladies! Thanks so much for your servant leadership, Crystal! You are a gift to us (in)couragers!
Amanda your group is such an inspiration to ME – it’s been such a joy to see you pour into the lives of those mamas and make them feel safe and honored. (and y’all make me feel like I can “do the thing” when my toddler is going crazy and all I ever say anymore is “no – don’t eat that’)
Amanda your group is such an inspiration to ME – it’s been such a joy to see you pour into the lives of those mamas and make them feel safe and honored. (and y’all make me feel like I can “do the thing” when my toddler is going crazy and all I ever say anymore is “no – don’t eat that’)
Proud and blessed to be a bench-warmer – the very best kind of bench!
Love sharing bench – space with you, girl. You are a blessing.
Love sharing bench – space with you, girl. You are a blessing.
Great post, Crystal. Encouraging and telling, just how much we all have enjoyed, and need each other. Community. So beautiful. I love being a part of (in)couragers, co-leading with Olivia Fulmer, Last Chick Out (for empty nesters). I have learned so much, and been encouraged, from not only our group, but so many other (in)courager groups designed for my special needs.
And you, Crystal Stine are AMAZING. Along with the rest of your team, y’all keep us grounded, blessed and uplifted. Thank you <3
Thank YOU, Debra, for being brave and welcoming and full of love for your sisters!
Thank YOU, Debra, for being brave and welcoming and full of love for your sisters!
Where’s the like button π
~LJ
We really do need one..or an “amen & pass the chocolate” button π
Where’s the like button π
~LJ
We really do need one..or an “amen & pass the chocolate” button π
Thanks for this post Crystal and for serving the (in)couragers! This opportunity to serve has been an incredible blessing in my life and I am so thankful to walk this road with such beautiful women. Blessed!
So thankful to have you as an (in)courager Becky! I’ve loved watching you do kingdom work with such grace & love π
So thankful to have you as an (in)courager Becky! I’ve loved watching you do kingdom work with such grace & love π
I have come to sit on this bench today and have enjoyed what I read. Glad there is room for me “again”. I follow this site a few years ago but had to reduce the amount of communication I was doing for the sake of time. I still drop in once in a while to say hello…hello Crystal…thanks for being there. Good post.
So glad to see you here Betty, it’s nice to meet you π
I consider myself a bench builder of sorts. If there is a need you can bet I will try to meet it. When time permitted I made several meals for a friend who lost her husband suddenly. Also cooked for family (hubby’s ex in-laws) when the father was in the hospital. It thrills my heart to do these things for people! I know that I am sharing Christ with them!! π
This is a beautiful example of practical, real life, bench building. Love your generous heart for others π
After watching the INRL conference alone in my attic, I’ve decided to be more intentional about building community in this crazy little town. I’ve started going to a church and a women’s prayer meeting. *sigh* It’s hard, but I’m sticking with it.
You know how brave that step is, right? How many of us never even try to do what you’re doing? Love it…and will be praying for those connections to be made, those friendships to form!
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