About the Author

Arianne is a mom of three boys and a baby girl. She lives in Phoenix, AZ, and sifts through the Legos and fluffy cloth diapers hoping to one day catch up on sleep. Her heart is healing and thriving from living life as a mom of kids with autism and...

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  1. Arianne,
    I always wondered why all the “sanity giving” groups broke for the summer (ie:MOPS, Mothers Morning Out, etc.)??? That’s when you need it the most. Summer always came as culture shock for me. One thing I did do for myself (and taking time for yourself is NOT selfish), is exchange watching kids with a good friend. She’d watch mine and I could peacefully do things by myself. Even if it meant just browsing through the mall or going to the grocery store solo. If Jesus needed time away from the throngs, I too needed time away in order to be a better mom and find refreshment. Then when it was my turn to watch, my kids had a play date and I knew I was giving my friend the break that she needed. Love your idea of chilling first!!!
    Blessings,
    Bev

  2. Summer is a difficult time indeed. I think it’s important to note that as much as kids love NOT going to school, they get frustrated with changes in their schedule, especially younger ones. So, no matter what, I still keep a schedule in the summer, if nothing else than for meal times. They still have chores scheduled for the same day of the week. They still have limits on screen times. Whatever strands of routine I can maintain through the chaos of summer is important, especially since my 17yo daughter has cerebral palsy.

    One more thing –> You know what they say on airplanes…put YOUR mask on first before helping others!

  3. This is awesome! Your words ring very true in our household!! I need to be abiding in The LORD MORE, but with the kids home I find it hard to make that time. Sheesh, it seems like I can’t have five minutes without someone needing something from me or fighting… Thus, I often try to avoid starting things that I know will only be interrupted. I am so frayed that I feel like setting boundaries is a challenge for me (i.e., a “strong” mom would enforce that her children leave her alone…). I struggle with my five-year-old wanting to play video games. Unless I am guiding him to do something else, that is where he is happy. I don’t want him playing w/ technology all day! I’m just venting 😉 and will be thinking of solutions. I DO know that I have a CD of mostly scripture related songs from a study by David Nassar. I play it in the kitchen to help keep my mind/thoughts on HIM! peace=chill 🙂

  4. I have the opposite problem. I have the summer to recharge and rest, especially now that my own kids are adults and gone. However, I teach seventh grade. What you are saying is true for me in the classroom as well. I am slowly changing my chill ability–through the power of the Holy Spirit–and by abiding in Christ. When I bend down to pick stuff off the floor–7th graders love to throw tiny objects at each other), I try to thank God for their energy and also that I can still bend over! I keep My One Word, GRACE, where I can see it so I remember the importance of extending God’s grace to these kids He has placed in my care.

  5. I have found that I get almost as much if not more out of my quiet time with God when I include my children. I picked up my Bible recently and my kids ran to get their tiny Bibles and sat down with me, pretending to read (5 y/o & 3 y/o). I decided to read Jonah FROM the Bible instead of a storybook Bible and stopped after big words to explain what they meant. I also stopped and recapped during the story so they would understand. They were so enthralled in the story and loved that they were learning about God. That particular story was a few weeks ago and my 3y/o son still comes up to me and says “Jonah shouldn’t go to Tarshish!” It keeps me in check that if I am setting the example in my Bible studies that I am also setting the example in patience, love, kindness, and faith. When they lose patience, have I shown them that? When they are not kind, did I show them that too? It all begins at home. Thank you for this post – an amazing reminder that it begins with us and hopefully leads to God.

  6. You know when my twins were toddlers and I looked at these moms with older kids in complete confusion to why they would want to school to start again, but now I GET IT! My patience is wearing thin lately. Loved this post!

  7. Though my children are grown and gone this really resonated with me. Not during the summer, but during the school year. You see, I am a high school history teachers with 120 “children” over the course of my day. This part, “I’ve noticed more and more that when I stay in a good place (abiding in Christ is my “good place”), I feel peaceful … . I feel chill.” spoke to me loud & clear!! When I’m in my “good place” (in Christ) MY day goes better, &’i know their’s does as well! Thanks for the message to “Chill Out”!!

  8. I really like this Arianne! I’ve never tried to tell myself to chill out. My/ Our society has put ‘people who talk to themselves’ on the fringe. Your words give a much different perspective and I needed to hear it. Thank you!

  9. Try fast forwarding to maybe October and imagine the crazy of getting everybody up and out, after school activities and scheduling, homework class projects etc. Now doesn’t the chill of summer seem better? Try to plan a small fun thing each day…wash the car and have a water fight…sleep in a tent on the back yard…put Jammie’s on after dinner and go for an ice cream . You’ll cherish the memories of these simple things for years to come

  10. So true how this works, Arianne. It’s even helpful in dealing with big folks, I’m finding. Thank you!

  11. Looking back from the perspective of more than fifty years, I find that I was extremely blessed. I had three kids within 2 years and 12 days. They entertained one another before they were of school age. We lived in a tight knit, safe neighborhood. We all had fenced yards, and five related families very close. A total of nine children, six parents, two grandparents, and an aunt and uncle kept the kids under close watch. There were other children in the neighborhood, and they all played ( mostly) happily together in one another’s gated yards, as well as on the front sidewalks of a fairly quiet street, generally with one or more mothers or dads watching from shady front porches. When they came in at dinner time, the agenda in most houses was a meal, warm baths and bedtime. At times everyone would be outside catching lightning bugs for a lab that paid for each one. In our house we had bedtime stories, prayers and devotions. They would fall asleep sometimes as I read to them. It wasn’t all Utopia, but enough that we could cope.
    (And NO ONE was in a rush to watch news or TV shows!)

  12. It’s a quiet time and your “chill out” call reminds me the summer is almost over. I’m glad for the little my grandson and I have done. I’m trying to catch up with the library reading program. Time to slow down with the ashes and humidity around Palm Springs area. Next week and the last before the year around school begins its term for my third grade young man. I’m grateful the court guardianship was granted to me and I’m sharing him with the paternal grandparents. God is good! Thanks for reminding me of the time!

  13. Great reminders and encouragement. I don’t have school aged kids, but even still, I find that the summer is trying my patience with endlessly long days at home with my 4, 3, and 1 year old boys, without the weekly routines of our moms group and church Bible study (on break for the summer) to help break up our weeks.

    The simple exercise of breathing deeply really helps calm me when my patience has run out and my blood starts to boil. Taking those few moments to steady by breathing gets my perspective in check. But I like your notion of telling yourself to chill out, too. Whatever I’m getting all worked up about on the inside will surely be better solved by responding with a cool head.

    Blessings on the journey!

  14. Thank you it’s a timely reminder. My children test broke up from school on Friday, I love the holidays but find the first few days/ weeks “challenging” as they get settled into being home again. I have just walked out as they had a fight about pants. My husband thankfully is so much more patient than me. Just chill

  15. This particular month has been different for our family because I had to work night shift instead of my usual day shift. So, the 16 and 20 year old, who have nocturnal tendencies anyway, get to sleep through the morning because I’m sleeping too! 7pm to 7am makes a big difference. I surprisingly enough am LESS stressed ( night shift has been less hectic than day shift is in my department, but most nurses can’t say that these days.) I think it has allowed me to “chill”.

  16. I don’t have kids, but with work changing for me– not in the way I want or like–I still need to learn to chill out.

    Thanks for a good post!

  17. My girls are grown up now, but I still have to chill out when they irritate me. Most especially because I don’t have the same parental “controls” as before. Which definitely requires me to Chill.

    But I remember an ah-ha moment when they were young and I was staying at home with them. I learned to put myself in “time out”. You would have thought I took away their favorite toy! I realized it was much more powerful (& needed) to put myself behind the closed door than them. It gave me the space to relax and regain my sanity. It also worked on them to realize I was not coming back out until they calmed down too.

    God luck ladies! This is only for a Season.