About the Author

Jen encourages women to embrace both the beauty and bedlam of their everyday lives at BeautyandBedlam.com. A popular speaker, worship leader, and author of Just Open the Door: How One Invitation Can Change a Generation, Jen lives in North Carolina with her husband, five children, and a sofa for anyone...

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  1. Jen,
    This is absolutely beautiful…and so honest. We have come to think of “dependence” as a four letter word in our society. Our world screams dependence is a bad thing. On some things it is, but pure dependence and reliance on God is where our soul finds its sweet spot. I have long wrestled with being a people pleaser and I have derived confidence from making all things good for everyone. This is a recipe for failure and it’s also very “me” focused. I would like to leave it at the feet of Jesus. Not that I go out of my way to annoy people, but I pray that my confidence would come only from my relationship with my Lord. You really have me thinking this morning…loved this!
    Blessings,
    Bev

    • Yes, finding that balance of confidence/dependence and where that comes from as we walk hand in hand with Jesus is a daily submission for me.

  2. Jen,
    Loved your vulnerability/transparency in Rattled! You sure hit the nail on the head. Our true freedom lies in complete and utter dependence on Him. I have been having a week from you-know-where, the enemy hitting his mark w/ fiery precision thrice- My weakest area. I just keep crying out, “Help Lord, You are more than enough!” And He is. God Almighty! Thanks so very much for sharing.

    • Oh M0 – I will be praying for you during this week from you know where!!! It’s been one of those for me as well on a personal front and my heart cries out with yours. xoxox

  3. So timely! I just sang a song at my church. Definitely not thousands. I lost my words and made the musicians start it over. My church is so forgiving. You do all the preparation and God is faithful to still call us to complete confidence in him, no matter if we think we fail or not. Hank you for your honesty.

    • Oh Mary – I think Satan must know the power of those words and can’t bear to hear them proclaimed!! He just doesn’t want us to finish. xoxox

    • Sharee – thank you for your kinds words!! Have a fabulous Friday! xoxo

  4. Jen, this spoke loud and clear to me! There’s this insecurity in me that causes me to put way too much focus on myself. if I’m not careful I can lose the perspective that God is in control of this…not Gretchen. That whether it is good enough is up to HIM…not me. The words you were singing…oh, my goodness…just so powerful and beautiful. I’m sure your audience felt His glory through your voice. Thank you for sharing.

    • Gretchen,
      Loved your comment!!! Yes “God is in Control”–We believe that His children will not be forsaken!! Praise God He controls this world and not us!
      Have a blessed weekend!!

  5. Such a beautiful truth, Lisa… ❤️

    I was Blessed to be born into a family of 6 sisters -no brothers. Each of us a completely unique masterpiece, yet we piece together like a breathtaking mosaic!! (Bless my sweet Daddy’s heart- He has a special place in heaven for surviving 6 daughters!)

    I’ve also been Blessed with a “Soul Sister”… Though our paths didn’t cross until we reached our grown-up years, our life journeys have been parallel from childhood to our current breaths… God knew we would need each other, and orchestrated this friendship years before we ever even met! We even LOOK like sisters, which is just sweet icing on the Sisterhood Cupcake!! She’s the kind of friend who can complete your sentences, make you laugh to the point of tears, remind you you’re beautiful when you feel like a hot mess, and pray you through those overwhelming life hurdles that seem to stop you in your tracks… Never an ounce of judgement. EVER. She’s travelled the same paths that I’ve traveled and just “gets it”. Gets ME….

    Not a day goes by that I don’t thank Jesus for ALL of my sisters… They are a priceless GIFT and I treasure them beyond all measure!!

  6. How BEAUTIFUL is it when God takes something that “rattles” us, and uses it for His Glory??!!
    I guarantee you Blessed a multiple of hearts during those moments of panic-filled worship!! (Been there, done that myself- and you described the anxiety level to perfection!)
    Thank you for reminding us to look deeper into those situations that we too easily deem as failures… We will always find there is hidden God-orchestrated beauty!!
    Keep Praising and Blessing with your voice, Jen!! ❤️

  7. Totally understand the way you felt, and the lesson you were wise enough to ask God for …depending on Him, not the confidence monitor.However you might be surprised how many people hearing a glitch like this are not judging, but praying, and marking the faith it takes to keep going…and receiving the challenge to do likewise. I’m sure BOTH services were really worship services.

  8. I have been in both places: 1) alone on the platform, totally at a loss for the next phrase in a song (with no confidence monitor), and 2) in the congregation when someone else suddenly goes blank. When it happened to me, I was embarrassed and humiliated. When it happened to someone else, I thought, “Oh, well. No one’s perfect. Memory lapses happen to everyone.” Now why wasn’t that my reaction when I was the one who couldn’t remember? We tend to be much harder on ourselves than others. It’s time to relax and let go of impossibly high standards–which tend to generate pride anyway!

  9. A long since broken relationship and broken ties to two churches. No real home or Christian connections any more

  10. This was I feel God speaking to me through you. I lost my job back in April. I have been looking and looking. Meeting with recruiter after recruiter . I feel as if I was being dependent on them more than trusting God! He is all I need, I should have faith and be dependent on his promises!

  11. A little over a month ago I moved to a new city, moving away from home and starting my first professional job. So far this has been one of the hardest months of my life. I like my job but it has been really hard for me not being able to see my family whenever I want, not having any friends in my new city, and having ot use a GPS to get anywhere. I feel through this process I am becoming more depedent on God as I don’t have my family with me or comfort or anything familar. It is so hard right now but I think this is going to help me grow spiritually, grow my love for God and my faith and trust in Him, and that something beautiful will come out of this challenging process. I keep listening to “Clear the Stage” by Jeremy Riddle and am reminded I cannot make my family or comfort or my my desires my idols, but must love God most of all and be dependent on Him. Thank you for this reminder.

  12. Jen,
    Loved your open honest vulnerability. I do sign language to music at my small church. Must remember not only the words to the songs but also the signs associated with them. I get nervous each time & try my best. Satan tries his best to get to flustered and make mistakes or forget the words/signs. Never have I ever made them start over I just keep going and pretend all is well. My point of doing it is to praise God and let my emotions flow to the audience.
    dependence each time is on God–because this shy gal couldn’t get up in front of people without His help!!
    Blessings 🙂

  13. This is a perfect illustration of where our confidence belongs: in HIM. I about broke out into a sweat just reading about your first service. Thank you for this timely reminder. 🙂

  14. Jen, I was recently “Rattled” at work. As a brand new manager at a hospital I was asked to give a presentation in front of about 50 people including the higest ranking folks at our hospital. Public speaking is my biggest fear & weakness, but I wanted to try to overcome this fear, so I said yes. As I visibly trembled from head to toe & bumbled & fumbled my words the CNO began to feel sorry for me & stopped the presentation. I literally felt like i was in a tunnel & everything was going black around me. A week & a half later, I still feel humiliated. I have felt like running away & giving up this new promotion. I now know more than ever about being called into something that only He can equip me for. I need all the prayers i can get for strength, confidence & courage!