The commute to my college is only thirty-five minutes, unless, of course, you’re going for class at 8:00 in the morning. Then the drive turns out to be more like an hour and a bit.
I’m convinced traffic could be used as a form of torture. There’s just something about knowing that you’re sandwiched between an endless amount of cars — you’re really not going anywhere. I think I mostly dislike the feeling of being stuck.
So this morning it was just me and the pink sky and twenty-seven thousand red brake lights. I have sixty precious minutes in my car before I arrive on campus, and instead of getting frustrated by the feeling of my foot constantly hitting the brakes, today I started thinking, “What could happen if I didn’t waste this time?”
What can you do in an hour?
Easy. There’s a lot I can accomplish. Give me sixty minutes and I can watch a show on Netflix, or finish a piece of art on canvas, or spin with my nephew in the kitchen and listen to his laugh. I could get a decent way through a book, or have coffee with a friend, or bake a load of nachos.
But this morning I took my hour and I had church.
I am a firm believer in church — the Sunday kind — of gathering with people and drinking coffee and telling one another about your week, and in the quiet, tender moments of worship, while holding your hands out and giving your whole self away.
But this morning, I had church too.
I was terrified to go to college. Beginnings are scary, aren’t they? And more and more, I’m becoming certain that bravery disguises itself as nausea.
This morning, I got into my car long before the sun had awoken. I brought my coffee and my bagel and I turned some music on, allowing the words to settle inside of my heart.
Make me soft, I said to Jesus. Make me vulnerable. Make me fully dependent on You.
Those were three phrases I’d never uttered before. But the traffic was at a dead stop, and the sun was rising, the sky all peachy pink and streaky — a mix of acrylic and watercolor, the prettiest painting I’d ever seen.
I felt small and scared and brave, all at the same time. I was praying and I was singing, and I was having church, right there in my small Mazda 3, right there in the middle of early morning rush-hour traffic.
In an hour, I could be doing a hundred different things. But for the next few months, I’ll have those sixty minutes alone in my car alongside the other innumerable brake lights.
And I think I’ll keep on having church.
Leave a Comment
Tracey says
I love this! I especially love this prayer “Make me soft, I said to Jesus. Make me vulnerable. Make me fully dependent on You.” so beautiful. Being soft and vulnerable does not come easy to me. Vulnerability is hard even only in front of Jesus. I get stuck in brake lights every am and I’ve been using that time with Him and it’s really helped the start of my day! Thanks for sharing!
Aliza Latta says
Being soft and vulnerable doesn’t come easily for me, either! So glad this encouraged you today.
Bev @ Walking Well With God says
Aliza,
I love this!! Yes, church can be anywhere that we make it. I love the prayer that you instinctively uttered. “Having church” is communing with God and so, it makes sense, that “church” and communing with Him can be anywhere. Sometimes I have it in my kitchen (I’ve attended church in my car as well).
I turn up the praise and worship music. Like David, I dare to become undignified before God. I dance around the kitchen, arms held up in praise, and I offer my off key singing up to the Lord. The dogs have become accustomed to this and now eye me as if to say, “She’s nuts,” and go back to sleeping. If someone came to the door, they might wonder if I have both oars in the water, but to me I really don’t mind.
The world might be a different place if more of us chose to have church right smack dab in the middle of the circumstances in which we find ourselves. Worship on Aliza 🙂
Blessings,
Bev
Joy says
Aliza, this is fantastic. I love your heart for God and your prayer to be soft, vulnerable and dependent on God. These are foreign words in our culture today. Knowing that God is worthy, and more than capable, of our vulnerability and complete trust is refreshing. Hearing your words today is inspiring. What a great idea ‘Church of the Traffic’. Praying God continues to bless and encourage you through it. <3
Aliza Latta says
You’re right — God is worthy of our vulnerability. I love that phrase, Joy! Thank you.
Aliza Latta says
Your comment about your dogs made me laugh out loud. I always love your encouragement, Bev. Thank you!
KIM says
My Mom’s Book and Bible Study group is reading Emily P. Freeman’s book “Simply Tuesday”, and she talks about basking in God’s presence in the small things and to enjoy feeling small in His large presence. It is wonderful that you are feeling small on your drive to college and using it as a way to commune with God. Praying that your time is blessed as you spend that hour with the Lord each day.
Aliza Latta says
That Emily Freeman is a smart woman. Such a good, good book.
Chasidy says
Beautiful! This really resignated with my soul! Thank you!
Aliza Latta says
Thanks Chasidy!
Michele Morin says
Aliza, I had the same experience this past summer, going back to work after 22 years as a SAHM. I really needed that “softening” time on the way each morning, filling my mind with Truth from memorized verses and praying God’s blessing and grace over my family — whom I missed terribly. So thankful for that time — and also thankful to be back to homeschooling my crazy teens.
Aliza Latta says
I love how you think of it… as a “softening” time. Beautiful.
Sara Thurman says
Beautiful post! Jesus loves this! Thanks for sharing how you start your day with His perspective!
Aliza Latta says
Thank you, Sara!
Lani says
Beautiful written expression of a common slice of life. Soft, vulnerable, and fully dependent…this made me fully stop and consider. Thank you for providing a needed meditation to begin this busy day.
Aliza Latta says
Thank you so much, Lani. So glad it encouraged you today.
Aliza Latta says
Thank you so much, Lani. Glad it encouraged you today.
Leslie M. says
LOVE this – I recently started a new job and have an hour commute – I find listening to the Christian music station or my CDs to be SO wonderful for my mindset == both at work and the evening at home. 🙂
Aliza Latta says
It really is!
Ellen says
This is a great reminder. We too often say…”I don’t have time to…” But it’s really more a matter of what we choose to do with our time. I will be moving soon. Moving from a place where I have driven for 2-10 minutes each way to get to work. Moving to a place where getting to work will likely require a great deal of time in traffic. Although I’m excited about our new adventure, I’ve been dreading this part of the transition. I now have a whole new vision for this bonus time!
Aliza Latta says
“But it’s really more a matter of what we choose to do with our time.” Totally, Ellen. Thank you!
Pearl @ Look Up Sometimes says
Aliza, I love how you write. I love what you write. Maybe God loves a good costume party? How different I feel when I realize the frustration of waiting is a disguise; that it’s really God’s gift uniquely suited to meet my specific need.
Pearl @ Look Up Sometimes says
Aliza, I love how you write. I love what you write. Maybe God loves a good costume party? How different I feel when I realize the frustration of waiting is a disguise; that it’s really God’s gift uniquely suited to meet my specific need. Thank you for this!
Aliza Latta says
Pearl, you are always so encouraging to me, and I appreciate it so much. Thank you!
Rachel says
Love it!!!
Make sure you keep a notebook or something handy, so you can write the things He whispers to your heart!
I am thoroughly convinced, along with you, that “Bravery is disguised as nausea” too ❤️
Blessings to you!!
Aliza Latta says
Great idea, Rachel!
Jeanne Takenaka says
Aliza loved this post. When our focus shifts from the brake lights in front of us to the Savior who surrounds us with His love? That’s when peace enters in. That’s when we can move forward (brake lights and all) with His confidence.
I love the idea of being intentional with your time in the car and having church. My guess is that you’ll come to December with a deeper relationship with Jesus because you chose to spend time with Him, and He’ll have met you there. 🙂 Thanks for sharing this today!
Jeanne Takenaka says
Okay, I loved this post. 😉 Although maybe you did too, Aliza. 😉
Aliza Latta says
“That’s when peace enters in.” I love that. Thanks so much, Jeanne.
Beth says
Aliza…yay! Church in the car is the best! I love my time in the car…just Jesus and me. I’ve been caught more than once singing with abandon at a stop light by the driver next to me! I just smile and keep singing. I would say there is no better way to prepare yourself for a day of college…keep it up!
Rebecca L Jones says
Well, I have always been soft and vulnerable, it used to get me hurt a lot, so be careful. And crazy? My dog prays with me, sometimes I think for me. It’s a good time for you to be young and experiencing His joy. Never let anyone take tha gift.
Lori says
Such beautiful writing and a beautiful idea-especially while the sun is rising. One of the hard things about a commute is the “wasted” time, but this is the perfect solution.
Julie Garmon says
Love this! Sending to my daughter who spends a LOT of time in traffic!
xo
Julie
Stephanie Ravencraft says
This really struck me especially because I get frustrated with traffic also on my way to work. But recently I have turned off the morning radio talk shows and had morning conversations and prayers with God. This quiet time with Him has become so special to me that on the weekends when I don’t get up to get caught up in traffic and am home with my husband, who likes attention, I miss that special time in the quiet. That is unless I can get out of bed before him which on the weekend doesn’t happen all the time.
Nancy Ruegg says
Turn the car into a place of worshipful refuge — arrive refreshed and rejuvenated. Thank you, Aliza!
Beth Williams says
Aliza,
This is me also : ” I’m convinced traffic could be used as a form of torture. I think I mostly dislike the feeling of being stuck-Yes that’s me! Loved this: “Make me soft, I said to Jesus. Make me vulnerable. Make me fully dependent on You.” Like you I turn on the radio/CD in my car and sing along. I praise God as I drive letting the words sink into my brain. Something about talking to and praising God that stirs the soul! That is a good way to use our drive time!!
Blessings 🙂
Theresa says
Turning a commute into church time. Lovely, and what a wonderful way to start a day. You also arrive with lower blood pressure than all the other commuters.
Ellyce says
I love that phrase about bravery disguising itself as nausea. I have also found that to be true. Sometimes we have to push through, don’t we? I love to have worship in my car. I think I give the people around me a laugh so that is another side benefit and blessing.
Beth B says
I have been commuting 45 min to over an hour twice a day for the last 13 years. For 11 of those years I listen to trash radio and by the time my drives were over I felt stressed. Two years ago I gave my life to Jesus, turned the station to KTIS, bought a bunch of worship music, and I cry out to Jesus. I notice his beautiful art in the sunrise, sunset (I drive into both) and often joke that clouds are my excuse for distracted driving. My life (and patience) in the car and out is so changed. Safe travels my Sister in Christ!