Tammie Haveman
About the Author

Tammie Haveman believes that average women can change the world by steadfastly serving God in the everyday. She encourages her fellow moms, sisters, wives and friends to love like Jesus using the gifts, talents, and resources right in front of them.

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& you will too!
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Reader Interactions


  1. Tammie,
    Just reading the one paragraph you wrote, tells me a lot about hospitality…..”with a friend”….”welcoming others”….”new faces”….”offering refreshment and rest”. All of these put the emphasis not on us and our ability, but on others and us making ourselves available to them. I believe when we take our eyes off ourselves and focus on others, that’s when true hospitality begins. It doesn’t matter if our home is a castle or a cozy apartment, if our focus is on others and how we can welcome them and meet their needs, then we have the gift/discipline of hospitality. Great post!
    Bev xx

  2. Tammie, thank you for this spotlight on the uniqueness of each woman in exercising that discipline of hospitality. It’s a spiritual discipline, really, and just as my prayer life and approach to Scripture is going to unfold differently from another woman’s, I need to believe that none of them are in any way Less Than. This post hits at a great time for me as I just welcomed about a dozen women into my home last evening for dinner and our monthly meeting, and it was great, but I woke up this morning with my mental checklist on full blast. And now you’ve reminded me to be thankful that I was able to extend the gift of myself to my sweet friends.

    • Yeah! I hosted a Bible study at my house and when I moved an armchair to make room for more, there was a pile of dust bunnies underneath. We all laughed and laughed because if there is one thing ALL women understand, it’s that we miss the corners when cleaning sometime. Ha ha 🙂

  3. Amen, Tammie. I love this truth – hospitality is a discipline. Hospitality is a lifestyle that draws people nearer to God. Thanks for this reminder!

  4. Tammie,

    Thank you for a interesting look at hospitality. Many of us believe we have to have immaculate homes, & gourmet food to do hospitality. That is not the case. Most people wouldn’t care how big/small/clean your house looks. They just want to know you care about them. Show them some encouragement & love. Fancy things don’t impress me-your love of people & God does. We can also show hospitality by visiting others & taking food or just spending time with them. Let them see God’s love flowing from you. Let’s all take our eyes off ourselves & put the spotlight on Jesus!

    Blessings 🙂

  5. I loved this reminder: “It is simply offering whatever space you call home to friends and strangers alike for encouragement, refreshment, and rest.” Good perspective!

  6. Tammie, wow. This right here: “Weaving hospitality into the fabric of our lives doesn’t require more than what we already have to offer.” The hardest part of not believing the lie that what I have to offer isn’t good enough, is when things go wrong. I remember once going out on a limb inviting some neighbors over for dinner. (A very simple dinner!) One of the neighbors found a bug in her salad greens! The neighbors took it all in stride, but I about died fearing we’d be the laughingstock of the neighborhood! Instead, I overheard them say what a great time they’d had. Trusting God with all my not-enoughness and all His enoughness to cover me is challenging!

  7. Oh Tammie, I can identify with your feelings of being treated like royalty at your friend’s home…overwhelmed and amazed.
    My mother was like your friend, only she, like you, had limited finances and the little niceties. She spent many hours cleaning & freshening the room(s) for company. Bed linens and pillows were hung outside to dry in the sunshine (oh how good they smelled). Bathrooms were scrubbed from top to bottom and our floors (and baseboards) were swept and mopped.
    These are the things unseen, but so important to your guests/family…cleanliness is next to Godliness ♥️
    So…whatever your style of hospitality, it will honor God and welcome your guests

  8. You know what Tammie? It’s everything we can do. We have one bathroom and when I invite people to stay with us? I always ask, “Can you deal with sharing a bathroom?” Sometimes the answer is no. But God knows. xo

  9. Love how you emphasize, not just the offering of home, but the offering of time as well, Tammie. It’s so easy to make excuse upon excuse regarding our time, so these words are a welcome reminder. Thank you. 🙂

  10. Thanks for your insight! I’m good at hospitality but I’m struck by the words “it’s a discipline,” because I’m not always practicing it!

  11. Yes, yes, and yes! I used the “hospitality is not my gift” excuse for years. To me, it was blatantly obvious who WAS gifted in this area… it brought them joy and filled them right up. It was totally their thing. Only recently have I realized that 1. hospitality is a command to all rather than a gifting for select few and 2. that I have actually been hospitable over the years without even knowing it! The more I dig into this subject, the more I love it! Thanks so much for sharing 🙂

  12. Tammie,

    Thank you for sharing your open and honest thoughts. Hospitality is messy. Growing up, I always thought that the house had to be in perfect shape (almost like no one lived there haha). But now as a young twenty something I’m intent to dig into the concept of messy hospitality. Some of the most meaningful times I’ve had in people’s homes has been when they’ve opened their home, in all it’s messiness, and their hearts. I’ve come to learn that most people crave vulnerability rather than perfection, which is both scary and encouraging. Your blog post encouraged me to continue to learn how to extend this kind of transformational hospitality to people. Thank you.

  13. I have a little Bonnie in me, that’s always the way I wanted to treat people and be treated in return. My house guests have included children, rambunctious boys and spur of the moment birthdays and dinners. So my decorating was unappreciated by boys who are hungry every two hours, even by some people who just come to eat. But I did the things I did for myself, for my mother, most people appreciated dinner. I even had a lady come in and just recline on my couch saying there was so much peace here. I even had Bible study and lunch for a while in my mother’s house, that was a lot of work, but I enjoyed what I did, I will just use a little more wisdom, get more rest. He says to do everything in love, not matter how much or little you have.

  14. I love this so much. Thank you, Tammie. “Hospitality is not a spiritual gift. It is a discipline.” This is revelation to me and life-changing.

  15. Thank you all for sharing. Hospitality is a work in progress. In my heart I want tonwelcome friends and neighbors into my home to share in life on a closer deeper level than just the weather.
    I find myself making every excuse possible and then I never follow through. I will continue to try.