About the Author

Alia Joy is an author who believes the darkness is illuminated when we grasp each other's hand and walk into the night together. She writes poignantly about her life with bipolar disorder as well as grief, faith, marriage, poverty, race, embodiment, and keeping fluent in the language of hope in...

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  1. Alia Joy,
    Sometimes I look at all the years an abusive marriage, anxiety, depression, and surgeries have gobbled up in my life. I think I could be very bitter if I wanted to be. But, God….”I will restore the years the locusts have eaten…” Joel 2:25. God, in His goodness repays us for lost time. His love can bring joy in years scarred with regret. What a gift your husband is and what a gift you are to Him. Keep counting the moments of joy.
    Blessings,
    Bev xx

    • We got away last weekend. A dear friend of my my mom’s owns a condo/cabin close by that she rents out and she let us stay there for free. It was so needed and so wonderful and such a testament to the goodness of God. Not that those hard times weren’t as well, but it was so nice to breathe deep and just enjoy a respite.

      • Sweet! Glad you got some necessary away time! Sorry about the bird, and the chronic illnesses, especially the bipolar. (I have it too, along with a bunch of other things. I see how brave you are in the midst of fierce storms.)

  2. Alia –
    I am always grateful for your openness, rawness and vulnerability. Thank you for allowing God to touch others through your words.
    Elizabeth

  3. Thank you for the beauty of your words and the way you make space for others to bring their disappointment forward, to give it a name, and to offer it up as we read about your own offerings.

    • I think naming disappointment and allowing ourselves space to grieve the lost things is so very important. Thank you for reading.

  4. ” I waited patiently for the Lord.
    He turned to me and heard my cry.
    He lifted me out of the pit of destruction,
    out of the sticky mud.
    He stood me on a rock
    and made my feet steady.
    He put a new song in my mouth,
    a song of praise to our God.
    Many people will see this and worship him.
    Then they will trust the Lord.”
    Psalm 40:1-3
    Thank you for sharing.
    God bless you.

    • Magnificent perspective, Jan. Thank you for taking me to the Divine Physician. And to His Word.

  5. Thank you for sharing your heart today! I truly enjoy the writings you bring. You are blessed with a talent that many don’t have, a talent with words and description-you make it come alive as if we are there with you in those moments you are describing. God bless you as you serve Him with the Gifts and Abilities He has bestowed upon you. Thank you for your faithfulness, even when it is hard! Keep on Keeping on!

    • This is so kind. To borrow the phrasing of Eric Liddell, Olympic runner and missionary, “God made me fast, and when I run, I feel His pleasure.” I hold the same gratefulness. God made me a writer, and when I write, I feel God’s pleasure. Thanks for reading!

  6. Alia Joy, God is with you every moment. He delights in you and calls you his girl. You are precious in His sight.
    It sounds like you and your husband are a great team. You love each other and show that love in action. What a beautiful example for your children.
    Keep taking that one breath at a time. You can do all things through God who gives you strength. ❤️

  7. Alia,

    It’s so easy to have a pity party & ask God why me? Why must I suffer so? God in His infinite wisdom has plans for all of us. We will never understand His plans until we reach Heaven. God will reward you for being faithful even in the midst of health issues & other losses. James 1:12 12 Happy are those who remain faithful under trials, because when they succeed in passing such a test, they will receive as their reward the life which God has promised to those who love him. Losing things, especially time with family in good health, is hard to deal with. I recently lost my last iguana (Tiny). It was hard for me at first, but now I know it was his time to go. He was old. I still miss him, though & his brother big IG who died years earlier. We must try to find the good in each day. Praising God for you amazing husband who loves you through it all. You are a gift to your family. Showing them the staying power of faith.

    Blessings 🙂

  8. Beautifully written, Alia. Like poetry to my soul. Your words, your life, always touch my heart in a deep and special way. Giving thanks for Josh. Giving thanks for the beauty around you, and for the little yellow warbler you held.. Your writing is a gift to us.

  9. Alia, I have put you on my morning prayer list. Alia Joy from (In) courage. I pray every day that you will have your joy. I have my “down days”, but nothing like you describe. Or at least rarely those. I pray that you will find your joy. Often. Many moments and days. My heart aches for you. It sounds like your husband is a “keeper”. May he be blessed greatly!

  10. As I read your transparent story of hearing, then seeing the bird. Trying to save his life, breathing each breath as though you were breathing for him, I envisioned you. You are fighting for your life in oh so many ways. Yet, God has you wrapped in a fortress, speaking “breathe” to you. The God who breathed into man the breathe of life. I feel your impactful writing comes from him in those times of solitude, looking out the window as the world seems to pass you by. So today, I name you “blessed”. Blessed by God. Blessed with a wonderfully supportive and understanding husband. Blessed with children who will bring you a dying bird and “breathe” hopeful breathes with you. Blessed to be a blessing to us.

    • What a beautiful blessing! I think you must be a writer, too. I am receiving those words for myself today ♥

    • I am a woman, highly blessed. This is true. It’s never not been true, even when I’ve struggled so thank you for this.

  11. I feel you!!! My daughter, now 44, has had asthma since she was 6 months old. My nights were spent half sleeping and listening for her wheezing which would send us to ER.

    Although her episodes are fewer and farther between, I still go through the same sense of worry when she gets a cold or her allergies kick up.

    My prayer for you is that you never let go of that knowledge that no matter what (the better or worse), those that love you most, love you best. God our father, Christ our Savior, family, and best friends.

    Bless you dear sister
    Loretta

  12. Alia,
    I too have asthma. I also have anxiety and depression “seasons” that wan and wave. I mourn with you the loss of the yellow bird. Birds have recently become a solace for me. I enjoy them all, but the hummingbirds are catching my attention more these days. Their colors are ever changing in the light and they flight is so gentle and fierce all at once. I was at my cousins house not too long ago and she has a lovely deck in the back that houses a couple of feeders. We just came in from a lunch and I walked to the deck. There on the ground of it was a lovely hummer, just laying there with it’s head down. My heart thumped in fear of what was the probable. My eyes squinted until I saw the tiniest of flutters…it’s heart was still beating! I called to my cousin and she took a white cloth out and slid open the door. Yes! It was truly still alive! It tried to fly, but seems stuck. Now we knew why it’s head was down. The little hummer got it’s beak stuck in the wood! Oh, my how we smiled and laughed! As soon as it was free it buzzed up into the near tree. It say for a little bit and then buzzed off into the neighborhood. I will never forget that. It was such a blessing to see that God took care of even the littlest of creatures. He WILL take care of me. He WILL let me breathe with the help of my albuterol inhaler and He WILL be beside me when I am in the “sad”. Breathe. Pray. Rejoice. Praise Him. I pray you are comforted with his embrace as you continue your journey in this lovely life we have. Up or down, wane or wax, high or low, breathing or sorta breathing…He is so good! Thank you so much for helping me see your visions and sharing your life.

    • Have you ever read writer Brian Doyle’s Joyas Voladoras? It’s often called his hummingbird essay. If you google Brian Doyle hummingbird, it should pop up and you can read it for free. It’s one of my favorite pieces of writing and I’ve probably read it over a dozen times since it was published. Thought you might enjoy it!

  13. You will never know how much your blogs inspire me. You are put into a bed of pain with incredible gifts. God bless you!!

  14. I love this essay. My husband is a bit like yours—-he takes such good care of me and shows me through his actions. Tears came to my eyes when I read this the first time. God loves us and delights in us! It’s good to stand in that together.

  15. I read this some time ago and have kept it on my browser as it is so inspiring. You struggle so bravely. Praying that your mind and body is at rest throughout the course of this pandemic and that you emerge from it in better health than you could ever imagine. Glad you got a break away 🙂