About the Author

Mary is a writer and speaker who lives for good books, spicy queso, and television marathons – but lives because of God’s grace. She writes about giving up on perfect and finding truth in unexpected places at MaryCarver.com. Mary and her husband live in Kansas City with their two daughters.

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  1. Interesting reading this morning because I too, have a leaky refrigerator. I am waiting for the 10 days to follow the Moderna Vaccine before having workmen come into the house. I have a repairmen waiting to come. I am a widow living alone, so the devotional about having Jesus by our side just waiting for us to ask for his help, is truly a comfort.

    • Connie, it sounds like you’re being wise while also not ignoring the problems. Praying you get the vaccine soon and that you can sop up that fridge leak in the meantime!

  2. Mary Carver, your words, confession, and guidance resonate like metal to a magnet. THANK YOU for your timely words to move beyond accepting what has become “normal” but does not glorify God, into the abundance Jesus offers. The abundant life of living with the mind of Christ, in keeping with His will and ways. Blessings to you, dear saint. Grateful for you today, dear saint.

  3. Great post. Yes, we often get too comfortable so much so that we don’t hear God’s plan for our life to bring blessings or direct us on another path. It is easier to stay where we are and grumble doing so.. He has great things for us we need to always be available to change . Trying to get my husband to move after 49 yrs in same house. No family here to help us in our senior years they live out of province. Why is it we sing “ I will go where you want me Lord” but we are stubborn and follow our own ways?

    • I think you said it exactly right, Cheryl – it’s definitely easier to stay where we are and grumble than it is to actually follow God! Praying you and your husband can find a compromise that works for both of you.

  4. Mary, you are a woman after my own heart! I, too, find myself “settling” and becoming complacent with “mediocre”. It’s been six years since I bought my fixer-upper house, and there are still improvements waiting to happen (like flooring that needs to be laid, items that need to be disposed of, other items need to be stored outside of the house), before furniture can be moved to their proper rooms and the house can be fully functional. Although much has been done and only small tasks await, I stall out . . . until I get disgusted with myself and tackle some of those pesky little tasks. I’m getting older, and it’s getting harder to stay motivated. Amazing how that all seems to parallel with my spiritual walk! When I do not utilize, to the fullest, the material and spiritual blessings God has provided, I miss out on the joy, peace and contentment He offers.

    • Sharon, thanks for being here today. I was surprised to see a parallel between a fixer-upper house and my faith journey as well! I love it when God uses unexpected ways to speak to our hearts.

  5. Mary, this is such a good (and surprisingly hard) question. I think you and your friends are right. There is something significant and powerful about the step of acknowledging our need and our own inability to meet that need. Doing so primes our heart to fully receive God’s answer, His gift, or provision, and then turn back to Him in praise, with greater awareness that it was all Him. Thanks for this reminder.

  6. Mary thank you for your words. I love what you always right. I learnt so much from. I remember years ago we had stage in our lives me and my Husband. Every thing seems to brake down. It was the fridge. Then my car when I was driving. Because of work. Then my Health. My Husband car it broke down and then he lost his job. But God showed both of. This we still had a roof over our heads food on our table clothes on our backs clean running water shoes on feet and bed to sleep in. When there were so many people in our world today without theses things. On our streets. No were to live. We still had enough even if it was a struggle to pay our bills we always found away that we were able to pay them. We never forgot to put God first in everything especially Tithing to him. God never let us down. God was so good in thoses hard times. Because we both believe we put God first in everything we did. We never not matter what or how little money we had then. Never forgot to titth to him. Even though yes it would have been very easy to keep our Tithing money say oh God we don’t need to titth to you. We could do with keeping it and using it towards bills. But even no it was hard we didn’t we put God first. We always tithed. God never let us down. Through time things got better. We are were we are today. After so long my health got better my Husband got a Job. So we now thank God we are were we are today. God helped us through it all. God walked with us every step of the way. The same way Mary he with you in thoses hard days too. God is Good all the time. All the time God is Good. Don Moen sings that song. You get it on YouTube. Just type in Don Moen God is good all the time. A lovely song. Thank you for what you wrote. Keeping you all incourage in my prayers Dawn Ferguson-Little xxxxx ❤️

  7. I feel this greatly Mary! My dad is currently at a skilled nursing facility to get better and my sister and I struggle with this decision. We keep telling ourselves that it’s ok, it doesn’t matter what others say to us, how their words sting us for making this decision. But it hurts so bad. We feel like terrible human beings and we are filled with guilt and asking ourselves, did we do the right thing. I completely understand how this stress if guilt can really harm a person. My blood sugars shot up and my sister have continuous headaches. How much longer can we endure the nasty remarks in the coming days? Lord, fill our hearts with peace and understanding. Thanks so much for sharing this message.

    • Maylee, may God bless you and your sister and continue to be your help in time of trial. It is so hard to admit when a parent’s care is beyond what we have the capacity to handle and then jump through all the hoops to find help. It can be overwhelmingly difficult. You are not a failure in this! You and your sister are making sure your father is getting the care he needs, which is the most loving thing you can do. Hold up your shield of faith when the fiery arrows of criticism and misunderstanding are flung your way, and be kind and gentle to yourselves, the way your Heavenly Father is toward you. Blessings.

    • Maylee, that must be so difficult. I’m sorry you’re going through this hard season but so thankful you shared—and thankful you and your sister are able to provide a safe place to care for your dad. I’ve recently watched my dad go through this with his siblings and my grandma (as well as a close friend going through this with her own dad). You are doing an incredible thing, taking care of your dad. Praying God gives you peace and protects you from hurtful criticism.

    • Maylee,

      Dealing with aging parents is soo hard. Try not to dwell on words others say. They don’t know the situation entirely. My dad went to SNF for rehab a few times. Each time he came out stronger & better able to handle daily life. Only you & God know if this was the right decision. Prayers for peace & contentment. May God give you both a discerning heart to know His will in this situation. Asking God to help you feel His loving arms around you & give you a big hug.

      Blessings :

  8. I really enjoyed this piece, and I know it’s going to leave me thinking for a while. I’ve been told I’m maybe a little too tolerant of broken and displaced things in my home! I also see you’re from my neck of the woods which is always fun. Thanks for sharing!

  9. Taking your good advice, I have asked our Lord for what he could do for me. I’ve pretty much thought he would know and supply. Praying my direct request will bring a response!

  10. Mary,

    Thought provoking post. We tend to read scripture & say oh yeah I know this story. But we don’t dissect it the way you did. Why did Jesus ask that question? I believe that Jesus wants us to come to Him humbly & ask for help. He knows our needs & can supply them easily. We are the ones transformed when we humbly kneel & pray. We realize that we have a true need & we have a savior who can fix it. He doesn’t want to be treated like a genie in a bottle, but loved & adored. He wants relationship with us. That happens when we humbly submit ourselves & pray to Him.

    Blessings 🙂

  11. I loved this, Mary. Such a great reminder to not try and skate around our problems but to go to Jesus and ask for his help. Going to reflect on this some more and figure out where I’ve been “making do.” God’s blessings!

  12. Given everything that is going on in the world and everything that people are dealing with, I know this is kind of silly but I have an exam I need to take and pass at work in order to keep my job and I only have a certain amount of time to do it and I’d ask Jesus for me to prepare correctly, go in with confidence, pass on the first try and to keep my job. I’m single (recently divorced), live alone, and I’m my sole financial support so my job is important. . .I guess this isn’t such a silly request after all!

  13. Wow, I needed this today. Lately, I’ve just been going through the motions of daily life, muddling through and hoping that the next day will be different. Maybe the next day will be the day my husband stops being depressed and stops letting video games take the place of time spent with his family. Maybe the next day will be the day my 12 yr old daughter overcomes her behavior issues and our household can finally have peace. So many maybe tomorrows, so much just dealing with it. I’ve prayed but most of time only half-heartedly because I’m just so weary. I know God hears me and sees me, but sometimes I think my problems are too big or too much even when I know in my hearts of hearts that they’re not. I know who God is and what He can do. I’m. Just. So. Weary.

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