This year has been ridiculously long and hard. It has stretched me more than I ever imagined. It’s been the year I never expected — the one I would gladly trade in. There have been moments of deep weariness — emotionally, spiritually, and even physically. Yet here, near the end of it, I can sense God beginning to breathe renewal into the dry places of my heart.

There’s been a small shift — a lightening of the heavy load I’ve been carrying. Even so, I haven’t fully given in to hope yet. I lean more toward being cautiously optimistic. Maybe it’s the part of me that waits for the other shoe to drop, or maybe it’s a little spiritual fatigue from this season. Either way, I want to hope again.

Scripture reminds us that God is the lifter of our heads. He trades our heavy burdens for His light ones. He delights in giving us beauty for ashes and garments of praise for our heaviness.

One thing I’ve discovered in this long, hard season is how easily I place my hope and peace in circumstances, people, or possessions. Too often, Jesus hasn’t been at the top of that list. This has been a time of stripping and shaking. I’ve lost my home, friends, finances, car, joy, hope, and peace.

The only thing I didn’t lose was Jesus.

It’s been just me and the Lord. I’ve clung to Him with every fiber of my being, doing my best to praise Him in every situation — even when I gave in to complaining. I’ve searched His Word for truth and promises, and I’ve learned to let the Body of Christ carry my burdens and bless me in my need. My trust, dependency, and humility have grown.

Recently, I took a trip to Dallas, Texas, for a weekend conference with a ministry I’m part of. I decided to stay a little longer to spend quality time with friends and in Upperroom Church’s prayer room. I stayed for eight days.

The Lord met me in the sweetest ways — in that prayer room, in the middle of crowded weekday gatherings. Ministry was simply to Him. Praises were lifted to Him. There were tears, shouts, and groans. He spoke His promises over me and filled me with a tangible sense of His love.

I also reconnected with friends — in the prayer room, over coffee, and around the table. I experienced “church” in the truest sense: deep, meaningful fellowship that reminded me of Acts 2 community.

During the conference, the Holy Spirit met me in powerful ways. I was marked by encounters of His love, glory, deliverance, and freedom. Friends laid hands on me and prayed that the Lord would move in my season.

Romans 15:13 has become an anchor for my heart:

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”

The God of hope has been meeting me here, reminding me that His strength meets me in my weakness. His joy has been my strength. His grace has sustained me. His peace has overwhelmed me. He truly is the lifter of my head. I needed time away — from the pain, the exhaustion and the noise of this season. I needed time with Him. I needed conversations, prayers, and hugs from friends who really saw me. I needed reminding that I’m not walking alone and that God still restores.

God has breathed revival into the places where I felt empty and tempted to strive for my own healing and outcomes. I’m not completely through this hard season yet, and I didn’t return home to find that everything had been fixed. But He has begun a quiet stirring of hope for what’s next — a new year and a new season.

If you’re finishing this year feeling weary, take heart. God is not finished with you. He’s still restoring, still strengthening, still writing redemption into your story. May we trade our striving for His rest and find hope for what’s next. The same God who has held me, holds you too.

How has God been meeting you in your season? How is He renewing your hope?

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