I opened my arms, embraced my son, and brought his head close to my chest.

He hurt himself, yet again. Just four days ago, it was a decorative figurine that fell and hit him on the head. This time, he tossed his neck back just a little too far. He’s tearing up, now — and I see the pain in his face. So I hold him until it doesn’t hurt anymore. This is the life of those who care for kids, isn’t it? We kiss their foreheads, wipe their tears, and hand out hugs like unconditional grace. Lately, though, I’ve been going beyond simply covering up boo-boos with Band-Aids. Instead, I’ve been teaching my kids (and myself) to take our pain to God through prayer.

I’ve come to realize the uncomfortable truth that pain is persistent. It swells and surges; it shrinks away. We cover pain with Band-Aids only for the pangs to come and go and come again. With this ebb and flow comes the emotional rollercoaster of feelings like fear, anxiety, worry, panic, and helplessness. It is a frightening thing to be in pain, or to witness a loved one in pain, or to watch the world around you reeling in pain. Are we ever not in search of a cure, a calm to quell the pain and panic of being a person alive on an imperfect planet?

I am finding there is but one thing, one tool, for those wrought with worry and pain. There is but one hope, one promise of help, for hurting hearts heavy with trauma, tears, and fears: We can meet our pain and panic practically with prayer.

This is not so much about spirituality as it is about strategy. We all can leverage and lean into the practice of prayer. In this, our hearts are refined to recognize that our pain may be ever-present, but so is our God. So, from my heart to yours, here are a few practical tips and tools I’d learned along the way. The point of sharing these practices is not to propose them as prescriptions for the perfect prayer life, lest we think there is such a thing. Rather, my hope is to remind us all that the secret to a powerful prayer life is simply seeing prayer as a practical tool that can be tailored to our every season.

Pray about “little” pains.
I’ve been teaching my kids the habit of pausing in the most unassuming moments. A scraped knee. A lost toy. A bumped head. A stuffy nose. These are all prompts for taking our pain to God. And, practically speaking, when we practice taking small pains to God, we pave the way for taking our big pains to God, too.

Pray when prompted.
In college, I volunteered with a ministry in the Bronx that served the youth. Our team leader taught us how to open our eyes to see anything and everything as a prompt to pray. Someone’s shoes by the door. Pray for God to protect them wherever they go. Sirens in the distance. Pray for God’s peace to surround those who are suffering.

Pray at every meal.
My sons and I pray at every meal, lunch included. These prayers often contain silent pauses and silly jokes. They are never perfect, nor are they eloquently long or robust. Rather, I trust that this pragmatic approach to praying before each meal will give my sons a tangible way to revere God at all times, whether we are in want or in plenty.

Pray without ceasing.
My late grandfather once told me about a story he’d heard from a theologian who would “rarely pray for thirty minutes at a time, but never go thirty minutes without praying.” This has stuck with me ever since, offering the reminder that I can talk to God directly, no matter how small the pain or great the grief. I can bring my praise, wonderings, wounds, and worries. Like a counselor on the other end of a crisis hotline, God is available 24/7 every day of the week.

Pray with praise.
Another thing I’ve been teaching my sons is to praise God when we pray. Effortlessly, it’s so easy to name our needs, listing a litany of complaints and pains when we pray. But hope is healed and pain relieved when we approach our prayers by giving God praise.

Pray with a playlist.
A simple way to soothe our hearts through prayer is with song. Pray along with songs that posture your heart to hear from God, including instrumental music, which gives space for praying your own words and allowing prayers to surface. The beautiful thing about having a go-to prayer playlist is that it can always be shared with a friend or fellow sojourner.

Pray while someone’s talking.
I often make it a habit of praying for someone while they’re sharing something heavy or hard with me. We can learn to listen to our loved ones while also simultaneously listening to God, asking, “God, what would You have me say to encourage this person or speak truth to their heart?”

Pray on paper.
When all else fails, I have found solace in the safety of pouring out my prayers on the page. I return to this practice in seasons when speaking aloud feels unsafe or unwelcome, or when I need a tactile way to make sense of my swirling thoughts and emotions.

Friends, in the spirit of these words, please share a prayer request in the comments. I’d love to pray for you. Today and always, through prayer, may you find yourself held by God — like a mother cradling her kid close to her chest, so much so, your pains no longer hurt anymore.

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