Preparation for Peaceful Holiday Celebrations: One Decision at a Time

Preparation for Peaceful Holiday Celebrations: One Decision at a Time

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A few years ago, I worked hard to throw a great celebration for our family. I spent a lot of time shopping, cooking, planning activities, and — I’m not going to lie — spending money. I wanted to give everyone some time off so they could sit back and not have to do anything. I wanted that three-day weekend to feel special for everyone.

But I didn’t realize that prioritizing everyone’s relaxation was setting myself up for things to go perfectly or for me to be really disappointed.

You’ll never guess which way things went.

The downward spiral kicked off when my son said something funny but sarcastic and, as it turns out, hurtful. I was crushed. I wanted to yell, “Do you know how hard I worked to make this great for all of you?”

But of course, they didn’t know — because I hadn’t invited anyone else into the process.

I had stayed up until midnight making extra food, when I should have spent that time with the people I love. Because by the time they filled up on appetizers, no one had room for all of my side dishes anyway.

In my effort to relieve my loved ones’ stress, I was only adding more to my own.

As a people-pleasing oldest daughter, I’ve often felt I must shoulder the responsibility alone. But I’ve learned I don’t have to stay alone. So much hurt, disappointment, and discouragement can be avoided by having conversations about expectations and sharing the load.

I love how the Message expresses Proverbs 21:5:  “Careful planning puts you ahead in the long run; hurry and scurry puts you further behind.”

I have lived most of my life in hurry and scurry.

But no more, friend …

I’m making a shift in how I approach family gatherings and I’m hoping you will too.

Because this holiday, I’m not worried about whether your son gets the cologne he wants or your sister gets the KitchenAid she’s been talking about since last year, or your husband or dad or uncle gets served the perfect slice of pie.

Beloved, my concern is for you. You, the one who wants to make sure everyone is happy. The one who has somehow been assigned to make sure that no one is upset or disappointed. The one who knows everyone’s triggers and is trying to keep them from all going off at the same time.

Beloved, I am worried about you.

Make your list. Right now. And then start asking …

  • What others can bring
  • Who can pick up grandma
  • Who can take over all the desserts
  • Who will be in charge of dishes

And next year?

What parts of that list can someone else take over completely?

Could your husband take over logistics? Could your daughter take over meal planning? Could you and your brother trade hosting duties each year? Deciding now will relieve a lot of stress in the months and years to come.

We are on the countdown to Christmas. What practical decisions could you make right now to ensure the next two weeks are a little more peaceful and a lot more joy-filled? Start with small changes.

Embrace the power of one small decision at a time:

Eliminate One Dish
Does your family need every single dish you make each year? We decided, for this one meal, it’s okay not to have a salad. And even though we bought two different kinds of apple pies at the fall festival, we’ll only defrost and bake one. We’ll save the other one for the middle of January when we want a pick-me-up.

Delegate One Dish
What is one dish you normally make that you can hand off to someone else in the family? Maybe it’s time your son learned how to make the family’s broccoli and cheddar casserole and carry on the tradition.

Set One Boundary
Practice having kind but clear conversations about your expectations this holiday season. You can’t fix every family fracture, but you can set the tone for the holiday meal around your table. If your aunt can’t keep her political opinions to herself, let her know that the table needs to be a safe place for everyone, and she is free to call and have those conversations with individuals before or after the holiday, but not during the celebration.

Progress, Not Perfection
This is where you will need to embrace imperfect progress and protect your peace. (And at the same time, protect the peace of those you love.) Maybe you can’t solve all the issues that make your holiday gatherings difficult, but you can make small changes that allow you to host the celebration you want.

Peaceful holidays won’t come from just hoping everyone magically does what is needed. But manage one small decision at a time and you can throw a great celebration that everyone enjoys, including you.

In Matthew 11:28-30 (NIV) Jesus says:

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

What a relief that we don’t have to carry the weight of perfection, people-pleasing, or holiday expectations alone. Christ invites us to surrender our burdens, partner with Him, and find rest in His grace.

Let’s lean into this truth as we prepare for the holidays, making room for peace — not through doing everything perfectly, but through trusting Him and inviting others to share the load. This mindset shift can lead to the joy-filled gatherings their hearts long for.

Want some help making decisions about what’s for dinner? Check out Kathi’s latest cookbook, Sabbath Soup: Weekly Menus and Rhythms to Make Space for a Day of Rest.

 

Listen to Kathi’s article anywhere you stream the (in)courage podcast!

When Rage-Walking Becomes Prayer

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Many of us have heard the adage, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Isn’t it striking how easily we can recall that familiar phrase, yet just as vividly remember the hurtful words spoken to us — words that have lingered in our hearts for decades? Scripture would disagree with the notion that “words will never hurt” and so would my own life experience.

In the Book of James, we learn that words can bring life or death – that the tongue isn’t something to underestimate.

Throughout the anti-Asian violence that heightened during the pandemic, when dehumanizing language like “China virus” was tossed around like confetti, I started rage-walking and I learned how to lament with others.

The problem with dehumanizing language isn’t just that it’s hurtful or that it’s a lie; dehumanizing language normalizes dehumanizing people who are made in the image of God.

In Asian American communities, many of us saw the impact of specific dehumanizing words. A quick look at national or international history will provide a plethora of similar examples of the dire harm of dehumanizing language and where it always leads if allowed to take root.

I experienced so much internal churning during that time that all I could do was move. This past month, my body, recalling that season and carrying the weight of grief and fear about what may lie ahead, has needed the same movement and prayer all over again.

Triumphant, cheerful worship and shallow platitudes didn’t help throughout that time and they still don’t do a thing to help me move through my grief, anger, or sadness. What does help is journaling my prayers, letting others know how I actually feel, and inviting them into the expression of those feelings. And I rage-walk to pray when I need to. What begins with rage — sadness like a storm stuck under my skin — is given to God, one step at a time, until my body can slow down and rest; until I’m aware of how safe and held I am by God, who isn’t displeased with or overwhelmed by my rage, and whose arms are open wide to my lament.

There was a time when I thought that standing up and slapping on a smile was spiritual. There was a time when I felt I had to keep my sadness, and especially my anger, to myself, lest I disrupt some appearance of unity or reveal that something was wrong with me. I lived as if I had to prove to God and others how faithful or faith-filled I was — how nice and pleasant I could be.

Spoiler alert: it proves nothing except that one can learn to pretend. And beyond that, it is utterly exhausting. No one, and I repeat, no one, is drawn to people who seem so out of touch with their own lives and the lives of their neighbors that they smile and carry on while the (figurative) houses around them burn down.

Can you imagine how different the story would be if Jesus, instead of weeping alongside His dear friends with the news of Lazarus’s death, was smiling, with eyes toward heaven, and said something like, “Don’t worry, God is still on the throne!”

I know things like that are often said to offer encouragement. We smile or bypass the pain of others with spiritual nuggets because we don’t know what else to do. Maybe our own pain has been bypassed in this way for most of our lives.

I love how Dr. Alison Cook, author of I Shouldn’t Feel This Way and The Best of You, defines spiritual bypassing: “Spiritual bypassing simply means that you use spiritual concepts, platitudes, or activities to “bypass” or avoid dealing with your true feelings, especially the hard ones like anger, grief, fear, loneliness, envy, and shame.” 

A month ago, I was having a terrible week. I found myself whispering countless breath prayers of “help” and “why” with plenty of rage-walking — until I finally felt held.

At some point, I invited others into my rage and grief. I asked others to lament (express grief) with me. A group of women showed up on an otherwise ordinary Wednesday, and for hours we sat around my dining room table, refiling our coffee and tea as needed while sharing our fears, outrage, loneliness, and grief. All of it was welcome.

What’s true and bears repeating is that sticks, stones, and words can damage all of us.

What’s true and bears repeating is that it’s okay to feel rage.

What’s true and bears repeating again and again, is that communal lament is a womb for collective hope.

What’s true is that God comes and stays close enough to each of us to catch all of our tears, no matter how many. And not just the tears that fall pretty.

As my friends and I sat and ate and held space for one another, I silently wondered, “Who holds the tears of God?”

And as I listened to my friends, I thought, It’s us. All of us. We hold God’s tears when we hold the tears of one another.

 

Listen to Tasha’s devotion below or wherever you stream podcasts. 

Love’s Twinkling Glory

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Friend, we invite you to light a candle or cozy up with your favorite hot drink and savor today’s passage from Scripture:

In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) And everyone went to their own town to register.

So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child. While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no guest room available for them.

And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, “Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying,

“Glory to God in the highest heaven,
    and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”

When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”

So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.
Luke 2:1-20 (NIV)

May these ancient words from The Great Love Story sink deep into your soul.

It may be the first time you’ve read these words, or perhaps this is the first time in a long time that you’ve really read them. Maybe you’re somewhere in the middle, slowly losing steam as the quick pace of the season’s hustle and bustle sweeps you along.

No matter where your heart is today, pause, reflect, and rest in the story of the shepherds and the straw, of new decrees and new parents, of heavenly hosts and a baby King. What a wonderful story of a wonderful God, promising His love will be with us!

May the truth of this ancient story light your spirit with fresh hope.

May the twinkling glory of Christmas breathe peace and love into your heart right now.

Today marks the second Sunday in the season of Advent, the four weeks leading up to Christmas Day.  Join us here at (in)courage each weekend in December and let’s count down to Christmas together. For daily Advent devotions, visit DaySpring.com — where you’ll find (in)courage stories each day this month! Sign up here to receive one each day via email in December.

Make the season bright by reflecting on the gifts and promises from God. Amid the fullness of the season, make space to quiet your heart and listen for His.

Let’s Trade the Magic of Christmas for the Miracle of “With Us”

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Chubby little preschooler hands wrapped around treasured ornaments as I tried my best to oversee the decorating of our tree.

My boys were young, barely out of diapers and — try as I might to make some sort of magic out of decorating — the noise of my young sons arguing over who would hang the ornaments meant the whole experience felt more like barely-controlled chaos than magical memory-making.

“I need a break,” I whispered under my breath and to my husband. Then, I hastily locked myself in my room for a moment to reset and calm myself from overstimulation.

It was there, in the quieter-but-not-all-that-quiet space that I realized the weight of pressure had settled on me. I was reminded of something deeper: Christmas was never about creating magic. It’s always been about resting in the miracle. The miracle of with — God with us. 

The story of Christmas is not one of glittering perfection or elaborate plans. It’s the story of a quiet, unassuming night when God chose to step into our world, taking on the form of a newborn baby. A baby, small and fragile, held by a young mother in the simplest of settings. No grand entrance, no dazzling display — just the everyday miracle of with. Immanuel with His young mother. God with us. 

In this season of motherhood, I often find myself striving for the grand, the special, the unforgettable. Elaborately-written rhymes that create a scavenger hunt for birthday presents. Steam train rides and small-town parades to kick off the Christmas season. I want my children to feel the magic. But what if the best thing I can offer them isn’t magic at all? What if, instead, I choose presence? What if I choose to slow down and be fully with them, to honor the miracle of God’s presence by offering them mine? 

Isaiah 7:14 (NIV) says, “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and will call him Immanuel.” Immanuel means God with us, which means this truth — God with us — is the heart of Christmas. It’s a tender reminder that we don’t have to manufacture something extraordinary. For, the extraordinary has already come. God has come near, not in flashes of brilliance but in quiet, humble closeness. And, in response to this miracle, I can offer the same to my children. Rather than trying to create the perfect Christmas, I can rest in being a mother who chooses to be her children in the mess, the noise, the everyday moments. 

When I think of that first Christmas, I picture Mary cradling her newborn, wrapped not in luxury but in love. Her quiet presence was enough because it mirrored the very nature of God’s heart — a God who didn’t come with fanfare, but with nearness. That’s the gift I want to give my children this year. Not mere perfection, not more things . . . but more of me.

So, this year, I’m letting go of the pressure to make Christmas magical. I’m choosing to step into the miracle of “God with us” by being fully present with my children. I want them to remember not the perfectly decorated house or the stack of presents, but the warmth of a mother who slowed down, who listened, who laughed with them and looked into their eyes.

I want my home to echo the heartbeat of that first Christmas — simple, humble, and full of love. A place where my children feel seen, not because I created a magical wonderland, but because I gave them the gift of my attention, my time, my presence. 

This Christmas, let’s release the need to create something magical. Instead, let’s honor the miracle of God with us by being with our children, our families, and those dearest to us. Let’s show them that they, too, are seen, loved, and valuable — not for what they do or what they bring but simply for who they are. Just as Christ came to be with us, we can choose to be with the ones we love.

May our presence offer a love that reflects the greatest miracle of all.

When We Need Jesus’s Hope Now More Than Ever

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In my historical Victorian neighborhood, families might put up two, three, or even four Christmas trees during the holiday season. The first tree is usually the fanciest. This one tends to face the street. This is the Instagram-ready tree that’s draped with the loveliest or most impressive ornaments and a fancy foliage vibe that screams, “Look, we’ve got our act together this Christmas!”

Tree number two tends to be the family tree. This one has a homemade look that only the people living within the walls love. This is where the kids’ perfectly imperfect ornaments rest for a few weeks each year. In my opinion, this tree isn’t complete unless there’s a saltdough candy cane created by a second-grader or a Scotch-taped construction paper wreath with a snaggle-tooth photo of an elementary school kid. This is the tree that we smile at each night after the kids go to sleep or we linger by if our kids are grown up and out of our home.

Looking at our Christmas trees evokes all kinds of emotions. But do you realize that whether you put up four or none or one Christmas tree in your home, we all tend to pop up emotional Christmas trees in our hearts?  

Our emotional Christmas trees are decorated with a mix of internal ornaments like memories, expectations, and anticipation. When we’re feeling upbeat and joyful, other bright and shiny bulbs like joy, gratitude, peace, and hope hang from the branches and light up our hearts. Since life isn’t perfect, the less-than-popular bulbs like past holiday hurts, resentment, unrealistic expectations, and holiday fears take up their space on the tree, too. Even if we don’t acknowledge our bah-humbug baubles, they are there.  

Maybe, your emotional Christmas tree is filled with memories of past, happier Christmases, and this year, you feel like you’ve been robbed because life isn’t the same and you miss that old life. Perhaps, your heart tree is anxious because nothing has gone as planned, or it’s overwhelmed because you have way too many plans.   

Today is an invitation for you to tend to your inner emotional Christmas tree and believe that God can light up your heart with hope. Will you give God that chance so that you can experience all His best blessings this holiday season? It’s so easy to let the hustle and bustle of the Christmas season camouflage or even cover up what’s happening inside of us. Can we agree that smiling on the outside, but suffering on the inside is no way to spend the holiday season?

Eight Christmas seasons ago, I didn’t have the strength to decorate any of the Christmas trees in my home because of a marriage separation, and my oldest child left for a year-long military assignment two weeks after Thanksgiving. My emotional Christmas tree was overloaded with sadness, grief, fear, and pain, and I almost gave up on celebrating Christmas. The a-ha moment came as John 1 reminded me that Jesus’s hope was bright enough to light up the dark pain in my heart, even if my circumstances didn’t change:

“The Word gave life to everything that was created,
and his life brought light to everyone.
The light shines in the darkness,
and the darkness can never extinguish it.”
John 1:4-5 NLT

In my dark season, Jesus’s light provided the path that I needed to walk through that time in my life. His gift of peace (John 14:27) calmed my chaotic heart so that I could see the evidence of God’s constant care for me.

As a practical way of living this out, I decided to create a visual reminder. I bought a pack of large wooden cutout ornaments and wrote the words on the front that I desired to reflect in my heart with a matching verse on the back. Hanging these on a Christmas tree reminded me of the attitude and gratitude that I wanted to hang out in my heart.

Here are a few examples:

JOY – Always be joyful. (1 Thessalonians 5:16 NLT)

HOPE – I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in Him. (Romans 15:13 NLT)

PEACE – Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. (1 Peter 5:7 NLT)

GRATITUDE – Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever. (1 Chronicles 16:34 NLT)

What if you took time this Christmas season to invite God to decorate your inner emotional Christmas tree with the good gifts that He gives? Whether you decorate ornaments with verses or put these verses in your phone as a reminder, the more you focus on the light that Jesus’ life brings, the more your heart will shine that light out in a world that needs Jesus’s hope now more than ever.

Article by Barb Roose from the archives and featured in Everyday Faith Magazine.

The winter issue of DaySpring’s Everyday Faith magazine is out, and you’re going to love it!

From cover to cover, you will find stories and articles in Everyday Faith magazine to inspire hope, encourage your heart, and remind you that you are loved by God.

With Thanksgiving just behind us and Christmas and the new year just around the corner, there is so much to celebrate and find gratitude in right now! In this issue, you’ll enjoy uplifting stories, meaningful quotes, heartfelt prayers, practical resources, and tangible truth straight from God’s Word that will allow you to pause and reflect on the reason for the season.

The article above is just one of many featured in Everyday Faith magazine, which is perfect for gifting to a friend, Bible study sister, Sunday School teacher, or neighbor. And to help you do just that, we’re giving away* FIVE sets of magazines — one for each winner and one for them to give to a friend!

Leave a comment telling us to whom you’d gift a copy, and we’ll draw five winners.

*Giveaway is open to US addresses only and will close on 12/13/24 at 11:59 pm central. 

 

The Best Advent I Never Had

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Every year I think it’s going to be different. (Every year it winds up the same.)

I buy a bright new devotional. I restock the candles for our wreath. I make the kids a countdown calendar, complete with chocolate and small surprises for each day of December.

But then life interrupts — every time.

I never finish the devotional. We forget to light the candles and say the prayers at dinner. Kids end up fighting over the chocolate more than enjoying the daily surprise. I find myself wandering store aisles at 10:00 p.m. on December 22, head throbbing, feet aching, trying to buy something for someone, who knows who.

Advent never turns out the way I want. All those perfect versions of the-best-holiday-season-ever? They only live in my mind, never the reality under my roof.

My dirty little secret, whispered from one woman’s ear to another, is that I love Advent — waiting for God in the quiet dark — but I don’t love December.

This year, I foolishly thought I would be on top of everything for Christmas because I’d be recovering from surgery during November, so I’d have plenty of time to make plans from my recovery bed and order everything online. (Are you laughing yet? Go right ahead.)

What I did instead was sleep. Rest. Recover. Exactly what my body and soul needed.

Now I find myself standing sheepishly (ok, sitting, still tired) on the threshold of a new season, utterly unprepared for what comes next.

This is exactly where Advent is supposed to find us. The point is to prepare for Christ’s coming, not to wear ourselves out before Christmas Eve. The purpose of the season is to humble us back into love for our Savior, not to try and save the season ourselves.

So this year, as my body recovered and my scars healed, I decided to do the most obvious thing. I asked God what I should do for Advent, since every best intention I’d made in the past had always fallen short. I was tired of ending up with another Advent that felt too fast, too fleeting, and too cluttered with holiday chaos before December 25th even dawned.

Do you know what I heard back in prayer? (It’s so simple, I’m almost embarrassed.)

God told me to sit on the couch. And do nothing.

In all seriousness, the strongest response I felt to my prayer was the call to sit my do-too-much self down in our family room, ignore the mess around me, and spend time with God. Maybe read something. Maybe pray in the quiet. Maybe do nothing.

I heard the message loud and clear to stop, slow down, and seek God. Right in the chaos of the busiest month of the year.

For a few weeks, I felt foolish about this non-plan for Advent. Friends were sharing their shiny, starry-eyed plans for spiritual disciplines or memory-making family celebrations, and I was going to sit on my lumpy couch and stare at the kids’ toys on the floor?

But you can’t ignore the voice of God when it comes clearly and won’t quit. I know what I’ll be doing this December, and it’s less.

The smallness of the Scriptures surrounding Jesus’s birth never fails to surprise me. What we know to be the biggest event in human history happened in backwater Bethlehem on a quiet night that almost no one noticed. The Gospels don’t share story after story of everything that happened to Mary and Joseph in the days and months around Christ’s coming; they offer only a handful of short stories that leave much to our imagination — a reminder of how God’s best work is often hidden, slow, quiet, and countercultural.

But the prophets remind us how God’s under-the-radar work was precisely the plan:

“But you, O Bethlehem of Ephrathah, who are one of the little clans of Judah, from you shall come forth for me one who is to rule in Israel, whose origin is from of old, from ancient days.”
Micah 5:2 NRSVUE

If the Holy One whose birth is the reason for the season saw fit to come among our chaos as Emmanuel — God-with-us who shared our humanity as a helpless baby — who am I to think doing one-more-thing will add to the beauty and wonder of Christmas?

All we have to do is open up our lives in small ways to receive the Christ Child again. To say yes like Mary. To let our plans be turned upside down like Joseph. To welcome even the strangest of nudges in prayer, like the call to do less — to stop rushing, slow down, and seek the voice of the God we wait to welcome again.

If you care to join me on the couch this Advent, feel free to shove aside whatever mess you find and make yourself comfortable. Slowly, quietly, surely, God will meet us right where we are, all over again.

For We Are Saved By Hope

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The surgeon says my bones are strong. Strong enough to remove the splint that immobilized my arm after surgery, and to do so a week earlier than planned so my elbow wouldn’t lock in place. Strong enough to attach a plate to the solid bone on either end to hold my shattered upper arm together.

Still, hearing those words and believing life will ever feel normal again are two different things.

Not a minute of my (waking) day goes by when I’m not aware of my arm. Invisible stitches pull it taut from the inside, even when the muscles feel relaxed to the touch. There’s an odd disconnect between how it feels on the outside and on the inside; the mixed signals confuse me.

Recently, I saw a verse in Romans that resonated with me: “For we are saved by hope …” (Romans 8:24 KJV) Because I’ve experienced times in the past when I couldn’t find hope, I know its absence cripples me.

Hope is crucial to my existence, especially now.

When I was thinking weeks ago about writing this article, it thrilled me when I easily pinpointed a topic. (Any (in)courage contributor can confirm the search for a topic often takes longer than the writing.) I jotted down some thoughts weeks in advance of my deadline. I felt so ahead of the game.

And then I began to lose hope, and couldn’t write about it.

I should’ve seen the signs I was sliding into hopelessness: I quit filling my diffusers each morning. I woke up one day and decided I didn’t feel like editing my novel. (I’m a workaholic; I could work on the book 24/7). I spent more time dwelling on things I couldn’t do instead of what I could.

Will I be able to hold my new grandchild in March?

Will I ever throw a baseball or go bowling again?

When will I be able to lie on my side comfortably?

Day after day, I told myself I wanted to return to the curb where I tripped, fell, and shattered my arm, but I always found an excuse not to go: I was too tired. I didn’t want to go after dark. And the one I didn’t say out loud: I was afraid all the pain and frustration trapped inside of me since August would break through, that I’d start screaming and wouldn’t know how to stop.

But I knew I needed to muster enough hope to write this article. I needed to move forward again.

So my husband took me to Costco, and I stood on the sidewalk where I fell that awful August day. I went to occupational therapy twice a week, and I asked hard questions about my prognosis. I stopped avoiding discomfort and started to lean into it.

Pain will pave my path to progress. So be it.

For years, I’ve tried to translate my experiences into something relatable to other women, but I know in my bones I’ll find few who share this exact one. Most of us, however, know how it feels to lose hope. To look at our circumstances and struggle to see a way out or a way forward. To lie in bed at night, unsure how to pray because you can’t envision anything that could make things right.

Hope can be even harder to find during the holidays when our pockets may be empty and our relationships strained. When the expectation to decorate all the things, feed all the people, and buy all the presents can stretch our resources and crush our spirits.

But God answers prayer in wildly creative ways. He cares about us. He isn’t restricted by the limited scope of our imaginations (Isaiah 55:8-9 KJV). I think back to a few years ago when I was under an unrealistic book deadline and I came down with shingles in my left eye. Thankfully, I received a four-month extension and turned in a book I was proud of instead of something rushed. It sounds crazy, but that case of shingles was an answer to prayer.

Ours is not only the God of hope but also the giver of it:

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Don’t despair, for we are saved by hope.

 

Listen to today’s devotion below or on the (in)courage podcast!

5 Tips for Writing (and Actually Sending) Christmas Cards

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There is no longer to-do list than the one I have during December. It is big, long, and far more ambitious than I am committed to. And at the very top of that list is one thing: actually send my Christmas cards.

I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with Christmas cards. All through the years as my children were growing up, I diligently sent Christmas cards. We had moved away, and I wanted to send a photo and a newsletter to friends and family back home. I also knew that if I stopped sending my own cards, I’d fall off others’ card lists, and I really didn’t want to stop receiving them.

I loved getting photos and newsletters from friends and family — well, most of them. Some I just couldn’t bring myself to read because they all sounded so perfect. Their children were smarter than my children. They had better vacations, better husbands, and in general, better lives . . . or so it sounded. The Christmas newsletter was the precursor to social media, except that with the newsletter I only had to hear and see the highlight reel once a year, not every single day.

But still, sending Christmas cards was always at the top of my list because they are valuable. However, last year I got less than halfway through writing my cards, and I threw them all in the trash — even the ones I had addressed and finished. Time had gotten away from me, and I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t send only a few, I couldn’t bear to finish them, and I just couldn’t send them after December 25th.

I didn’t send Christmas cards, and I love Christmas cards.
I didn’t send Christmas cards, and I love all things Christmas.
I didn’t send Christmas cards, and I work for a company that makes greeting cards.

I let time slip away last year, and I was sad, and when I think about it, I still get sad — sad I didn’t find or take the time to write Christmas cards because while words are powerful, handwritten words are priceless.

So this is the year. This is the year to be mindful and deliberate, to respond to Christmas with an attitude of worship, like that very first Christmas.

Mary sang her song, and her soul glorified the Lord. Her spirit rejoiced in God her Savior. The song she sang acknowledged the great things He has done and His mercy that lifts the humble and fills the hungry (Luke 1:46-55).

Mary took the time to worship through song, and I will take the time to worship via meaningful words in each Christmas card I write. It might be five cards or fifty cards, but no matter how many, they will be meaningful.

Words of hope, joy, and encouragement from me will be found in the mailboxes of my loved ones, not in my trash.

This is the season to slow down, rest, worship, and tell others of the great things He has done. This year I am giving encouragement — and a few gifts, of course!

Here are five tips for writing (and actually sending) Christmas cards:

  1. Make a Christmas card spreadsheet. Get a count, fill in addresses, and keep track of cards that were sent and/or received.
  2. Buy stamps ahead of time. Go buy them today!
  3. Write and address a few cards each night. Pop them in your mailbox each morning, put up the flag, and feel satisfied about getting closer to the finish line.
  4. Let your kids help! If their handwriting is legible, let them sign the family name on the cards. Give them some stickers or crayons, and let them decorate the envelopes. If they’re older, put them in charge of that spreadsheet, have them pick up stamps at the store, or let them pick out the actual cards. Whatever their ages, they can help out!
  5. Select Christmas cards that reflect Christ! We love a glittery snowman, but when it comes to cards, we love making it about Jesus. In case you need to stock up, here are a few of our favorites from DaySpring.

Friends, there is still time. Enlist your family to help lick envelopes, crank out those address labels, and send off some Christmas cheer.

For more inspiration, read these articles from DaySpring:

  1. How Sending a Christmas Card Encourages Your Heart
  2. The Lasting Gift of a Christmas Card
  3. What to Write in a Christmas Card
  4. Who Did You Forget This Christmas?

Listen to our daily devotions below or on the (in)courage podcast!

Happy first week of Advent! Join us here at (in)courage each weekend in December for an Advent-themed devotion!

And for daily Advent devotions, visit DaySpring.com any day in December! They are featuring Advent and Christmas-themed devotions by (in)courage writers each day this month! Sign up here to receive one each day until Christmas. Make the season bright by reflecting on the gifts and promises of God.

What Do You Do When It Feels Like the Provision Isn’t Coming?

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It felt like the perfect storm. 

The charity I work for called an all-staff meeting to break the news: the finances we required and expected to have weren’t coming. Multiple donors — all at the same time — needed to pull out. They didn’t have the money to donate to us this year.

I was confident God would provide. God always provides, doesn’t He? My team prayed and fasted. We confessed and repented. We lamented. We hoped. We took communion together. I went to bed each night and awoke each morning full of faith that the money would show up.

I started checking my mailbox regularly just in case a surprise check was arriving. We received prophetic words that the finances would be coming soon. I kept my eyes open for how God might wow us this time. But as the days and weeks went by, and the provision I was praying for didn’t appear, I could feel my faith beginning to falter. 

What happens when the provision you’re praying for doesn’t seem to come when and how you need it?

The discouragement set in. On a morning when our team spirits felt particularly low, I decided to buy a colleague a coffee, just to brighten her day and remind her to keep going. (Coffee makes everything slightly more doable, doesn’t it?) 

When I got to the line at the drive-through, I felt God’s Spirit inviting me to pay for the person behind me. I didn’t want to. My personal finances didn’t necessarily feel tight, but when everything else is shrinking in front of you, there’s a temptation to get stingy. 

I rolled down my window and asked the barista if I could cover the person behind me. 

“Sure you can!” But then, a few seconds later, he told me that person had already paid. 

I laughed, and asked if I could pay for the person behind them.

He checked, and then said that person had used their app and already gotten a free drink.

I laughed again, a bit bewildered. “Let’s try this one more time. How about the person behind them?”

“You wouldn’t believe this… but they already paid too. And there’s no one behind them.”

He handed me the coffees for me and my coworker. I thanked him and drove off.

Had I heard from the Holy Spirit correctly? I prayed as I drove away. God, why would You ask me to pay if no one needed their coffee paid for today?

Immediately, I heard His still, small voice in response: I wanted to see if your heart would remain generous, even when the temptation is to get stingy.

It stopped me in my tracks. Tears filled my eyes as I considered the invitation the Lord had just offered me. 

What happens when the provision you’re praying for doesn’t seem to come when and how you need it? I think the answer is twofold: don’t stop praying, but also don’t stop being generous. 

It was such a simple invitation, but it changed everything for me. When things don’t unfold the way I want them to, I so easily harden my heart. I lose faith. I close my fists and get stingy. But what if Jesus’s invitation is to do the opposite? To remain open-handed and generous, even when you can’t see how or when the provision is coming? 

God is not stingy or close-handed. He is a generous God who gives us everything – His own breath… even His own Son. 

I’m reminded that we don’t follow Jesus in order for Him to give us exactly what we want, when and how we want it. 

We follow Jesus because He is God, generous and open-handed who gives and gives and gives – more than you or I can ever imagine. 

How could we not be generous too? 

Listen to Aliza’s devotion anywhere you stream the (in)courage podcast!

Today is the first week in the season of Advent, the four weeks leading up to Christmas Day. Join us here at (in)courage each weekend in December for an Advent-themed devotion!

And for daily Advent devotions, visit DaySpring.com any day in December! They are featuring Advent and Christmas-themed devotions by (in)courage writers each day this month! Sign up here to receive one each day until Christmas. Make the season bright by reflecting on the gifts and promises of God.

The Promise of Peace

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“For a child will be born for us,
a son will be given to us,
and the government will be on his shoulders.
He will be named
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Eternal Father, Prince of Peace.”
Isaiah 9:6 CSB

As we begin this Advent season, perhaps more than ever, we feel the ache of wanting God to make all things right. Let’s let the words of this familiar passage sink deep in our hearts.

Jesus is our Wonderful Counselor. When we are in despair from a present overwhelming pain or cumulative grief, we remember that God is Healer and Counselor. He is both the One who helps us and the very balm we need for our broken hearts, fragile minds, and bruised bodies.

Jesus is our Mighty God. When we are taken advantage of, when we feel powerless, when we cannot control or predict what will happen next, God is our strength and our defender. No one can stand against His powerful name.

Jesus is our Eternal Father. When we feel unloved — particularly during this holiday season — we remember that God is our loving Father. The perfect parent, provider, and protector. He has known us from before He created the world. He knows our every hair, thought, and breath. He knows where we are headed and He cares about every part of our lives.

Jesus is our Prince of Peace. When fear and anxiety rule our hearts, He is still the giver of peace. Jesus Himself is Peace and dwells within us through the Holy Spirit. Find rest in Him.

Come, Lord Jesus, come. Amen. 

He will. And He has! And the same words Jesus spoke to His disciples on their last night together, He speaks to our hearts today.

“Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Don’t let your heart be troubled or fearful.”
John 14:27 CSB

Indeed, the Savior is coming and has come. The Prince of Peace. The Only One we need.

Today marks the first Sunday in the season of Advent, the four weeks leading up to Christmas Day. Join us here at (in)courage each weekend in December and let’s count down to Christmas together. For daily Advent devotions, visit DaySpring.com — they are featuring (in)courage devotions each day this month! Sign up here to receive one each day via email in December.

Make the season bright by reflecting on the gifts and promises from God. Amidst the hustle and bustle of the season, make time to quiet your heart and hear from His.

You Are Allowed to Be a Burden

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Last February, everything changed when I broke my foot.

While perched cross-legged on my couch, my foot fell asleep. I didn’t realize the slumbering status of this limb, and I took a step. In an instant, my toes caught on the carpet and I stumbled forward as the entire weight of my body crunched my fifth metatarsal. I crumpled in a heap with my foot on fire, throbbing as my husband drove me to the emergency room.

In the days and weeks that followed, my right foot was rendered unusable. I could not drive, let alone get up and down the stairs to our apartment on the second floor.

For eight weeks, I was homebound. Instead of my usual activities, I was confined to putter around our house, my foot secured in the clunky, black orthotic boot with the Velcro straps. Our children attend a school that is across the city and, suddenly, I had to scramble to find folks to give them rides home. The calendar spreadsheet lay before me on my laptop, and I began texting friends:

“Could you pick up our boys from school?”

I asked for help and assistance, needing all the support I could get for two whole months, five days each week. It was a lot to ask, but I decided to try anyway. And, to my surprise, my friends kept saying, “Yes.”

One person thanked me for asking because she was glad for the opportunity to help. Our church rallied around us and brought dinner to our door for weeks. One friend even came over and cleaned our apartment, top to bottom, for three hours while I sat on the couch with my leg propped.

We are people that show up. If our friends are gripped with a raging fever or are suffering under influenza’s chill, we bring soup. We scribble encouraging notes and deliver casseroles. When someone cannot pay rent, we support them the best we can. These gestures and savory aromas are a beautiful incense of love. This is what the Church is and should always be about. Yet, while our culture values serving others, no one actually wants to be the person in need. The wider world prizes self-sufficiency and sometimes we, even as believers, also strive to steer clear of looking weak or incapable.

It was humbling to ask for help when I broke my foot . . . and, on this journey, I’m learning that honesty and vulnerability will only flow among friends when we choose to go first. The first to help, but also the first to admit our frailty and our need. The Bible tells of four friends who sought to carry an ailing man to Jesus but found there was no way to approach Jesus due to the enormous crowd. These friends climbed onto the roof of the house where Jesus was, beads of sweat trickling down their temples as they struggled to heave their precious load. Once atop the roof, they dug into the straw and tar to form a hole big enough to lower their friend through for the healing he was soon to receive.

This man was miraculously healed and, undeniably, we all want to be like those friends who ultimately carried the man towards help and healing. Yet, consider how courageous it is to be the one on the mat. It is courageous to admit we need help. Though, at times, this process can be frightening or humiliating, still, the practice of disclosing our vulnerability is worthwhile.

Jesus invites us into these seasons of dependence on others, always. People in our communities may even take joy in using their gifts to serve us. You are allowed to be a burden. Friend, this posture is not shameful. It may be the hardest thing you do, but we are invited to go first.

Don’t wait until you break a bone to invite people in.

How to Hear Him Better This Advent

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“He made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.”
Philippians 2:7 NIV

Every time it snows, I wait for my opportunity. When the house is quiet and dark, I tiptoe into the living room and curl up mesmerized in the big front window to watch the flakes fall silently — blanketing the ground, trees, and houses — muting the world. Is that a rabbit peering from the edge of the trees?

These are sacred moments. The blue light of my phone and the voices competing for my attention are traded for the yellow light of the moon and hushed white clusters streaming to the earth. I sigh in relief.

I feel small, and I remember One who made Himself small. Jesus, who, “became flesh and made His dwelling among us” (John 1:14 NIV). I can hear Him better sitting in this stillness. I wait in anticipation.

In the quiet, I realize, and maybe you do too, that I have become full. And not in a good way. Full of expectations for this season, full of plans and pulls. Full of Facebook and Instagram — I just can’t seem to put them down. Full of myself and what I want. I’m so filled up that I can’t put anything else in.

When I feel like this, I know what I need to do, but sometimes I need someone else to confirm it. So if you need confirmation, too, you have it from me. I have to empty myself of me and make room for Jesus. I must turn off the distractions, even some good ones, so I can focus on the One who is ultimately the most important.

I pour it all out on paper — confess what’s been swirling around in my head, plaguing me. Maybe it’s not paper for you — maybe you talk out loud or play the guitar or paint — but our prayers of confession come out. I ask for forgiveness and He gives it.

And I ask Him to come: Emmanuel, God with Us, come fill this season and my heart. I’m sweeping out the clutter — setting my phone notifications to “Off” and logging out of all those accounts that distract me from what is important.

I want to hear Him so I can be like Him.
I want to be like Him this Advent.
Less of me and more of Him.
Less looking at my phone and more looking at my family’s eyes.
Less “what I want” and more “how can I serve?”

It all begins in the stillness.

This article is by Lauren DeVries from the archives and featured in the Simply Jesus Christmas Magazine.

DaySpring has a special keepsake holiday magazine called Simply Jesus: The Heart of Christmas, and it’s a beautiful resource for holiday inspiration and soul encouragement. You will find a collection of powerful Scriptures, inspiring prayers, and heartfelt articles.

Deepen your faith during this sacred season and help your family celebrate Christmas together in new and exciting ways.

Pick up your copy of Simply Jesus: The Heart of Christmas wherever magazines are sold and at DaySpring.com. We aim to inspire you with heartfelt stories and uplifting articles, Christmas traditions, family celebrations, Advent observances, and ways to keep Christ at the center of it all. With every page, we hope to warm your heart, strengthen your faith, and reignite the Christmas spirit in your home.

This article is just one of many featured in the Simply Jesus keepsake Christmas magazine, which, by the way, is perfect for gifting to a friend, Bible study sister, Sunday School teacher, or neighbor. And to help you do just that, we’re giving away FIVE sets of magazines — one for each winner and one for them to give to a friend! 

Leave a comment telling us to whom you’d gift a copy!

We’ll draw five winners to notify by email*.

*Giveaway is open to US addresses only and will close on 12/3/24 at 11:59 pm central. 

Your Path to Seeing God Work Right Here, Right Now

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Let the whole earth shout triumphantly to the Lord!
Serve the Lord with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.
Acknowledge that the Lord is God.
He made us, and we are his—
his people, the sheep of his pasture.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise.
Give thanks to him and bless his name.
For the Lord is good, and his faithful love endures forever;
his faithfulness, through all generations.
Psalm 100 CSB

Here’s the powerful truth about giving thanks:

Gratitude lifts our hearts beyond the weight of our circumstances to the unfailing goodness of God. As Psalm 100 invites us to, we can enter His gates with thanksgiving and His courts with praise. In deep pain, in prolonged waiting, even in the middle of life’s small inconveniences, choosing thankfulness becomes a pathway to God’s presence.

When we turn our attention to God’s faithfulness, our perspective changes.

Gratitude opens our eyes to see God working right here, right now.

Whether we’re giving thanks for the beauty of fall, the laughter of loved ones, or the reminder of His promises, each moment of thankfulness is a moment spent in the light of His love.

Write down what you’re grateful for: today’s blessings, memories of God’s goodness, and promises you’re holding onto. Speak them aloud, jot them in a journal, or share them with someone you trust. Let this practice turn your heart to praise, for “the Lord is good and His love endures forever.”

And as we take time to count our blessings, know that you are counted among ours. Every one of you in this community is a gift to us. Thank you for letting us share in your journey of faith and for sharing your own stories with us. We are grateful for you, today and always.

Happy Thanksgiving, dear friends!

Help If Joy Is Hard at the Holidays

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Years ago I sat in a crowded room at a blogging conference. I’ve forgotten almost everything from that weekend except one phrase that author and researcher Brené Brown said from the stage, “Joy is the most vulnerable emotion we can feel.”

I had two thoughts when I heard these words: “What?” and “Exactly.”

The first reaction came because we tend to think of joy as an “easy” emotion. It’s not heavy like sadness or intense like anger. Joy is the floating balloon, the cotton candy, the confetti of our feelings. But that is a false perception. It turns out joy takes great courage.

Why? Because our brains are wired to protect us from danger. When we feel joy, we also have something to lose. Brené told Inc magazine that “80-90 percent of parents, when experiencing a moment of bliss gazing upon their sleeping child, will then picture something horrific happening to the child.”

Have you ever done something like this? You hug someone you love, and suddenly worry that they’ll get in a car wreck on their way home. You get the promotion you worked so hard for, only to feel like a fraud and picture yourself being fired. You’re finally relaxing on a beach vacation, then remember a news headline you read and feel anxious.

Joy is hard for humans, so this morning I looked up every verse about joy to seek some divine help. I found one phrase that was repeated many times, “filled with joy.”

He [God] helps me, and my heart is filled with joy. Psalm 28:7 NLT

Jesus was filled with the joy of the Holy Spirit. Luke 10:21 NLT

The believers were filled with joy and with the Holy Spirit. Acts 13:52 NLT

May you be filled with joy. Colossians 1:11 NLT

I’d always viewed joy as something I had to produce, but “being filled” means joy is something God’s Spirit pours into me.

Here’s what I’m coming to believe: We, as humans, aren’t truly capable of joy on our own. It doesn’t come naturally to us. At best, it’s fleeting and dependent on our circumstances. At worst, it’s something we fake but never truly experience.

Here’s what I’m learning: Joy is something we can ask God to fill us with rather than forcing ourselves to feel it. As someone who has experienced anxiety and depression, I’m not saying we’ll feel joy if we just have enough faith. I’m also not saying that we will always experience joy, which isn’t possible or even biblical. What I’m exploring is an alternative to putting pressure on ourselves to be happy-happy all the time. Maybe our role is simply to open ourselves to joy, to not slam the door of our hearts when it comes knocking.

Joy is also not meant to be our only emotion. Paul says, “Always be joyful” (1 Thessalonians 5:16) but he also says, “My heart is filled with bitter sorrow and unending grief” (Romans 9:2). Jesus is described as being full of joy and as being a man of sorrows. Proverbs 14:13 tells us, “Even in laughter the heart may be in pain, and the end of joy may be grief.”

As I say in my new devotional book, “We always live with both brokenness and blessings. Challenges and victories. Sorrow and joy. They’re all mixed up together. God understands both.”

Brené says that the practice the most joyful people have in common is gratitude. I would add one more element to gratitude, and that’s trust.

Gratitude today + trust for tomorrow = learning to bravely open the door to joy.

This looks like pausing to say, “God, thank You for this beautiful sleeping baby. I trust You with her future.”

It’s hugging someone we love and saying, “God, thank You for every moment I get to have them in my life. I place them in Your hands.”

It’s accepting the promotion and saying, “God, thank You for getting me this far. I believe You’ll get me through whatever is ahead too.”

It’s standing on the beach and saying, “God, thank You for the extraordinary world You’ve created. You alone are the caretaker of everything and everyone.”

The healthiest humans are those who are open to the whole range of emotions and experience all of them.

Some of us resist negative emotions. We banish sadness and anger because they’re uncomfortable. Some of us resist positive emotions. We shut down joy and happiness because they feel so vulnerable. I’m in the latter group — I can sit with grief and walk alongside sorrow. But joy? That’s scary stuff.

I’m learning joy is not a feeling to force, but a gift to receive. Opening our hearts to embrace it, especially in a broken world, takes guts and bravery. Joy isn’t a balloon, cotton candy, or confetti. It’s challenging and risky, maybe even a little crazy. It’s a wild act of worship by warriors with dents in their armor.

It’s okay if joy is hard for you to feel during the holidays. This doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you or your faith — it simply means you’re human. God understands this and He will be with you in everything you face, in every emotion you feel.

If the holidays are hard or stressful for you, Holley Gerth has an encouraging gift to get you through this season. Her mini ebook, Hope for the Holidays, includes twenty devotions, beautiful graphics, and more. Download your free copy now, then share this post so your friends and family can get this lovely gift too!

Trusting God to Blend the Good and the Bad

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My daughter asked if we could celebrate her 29th birthday at a paint-your-own-art studio. Armed with more confidence than my non-artistic self should have, I selected a colorful abstract design of a woman wearing a colorful hat to paint on canvas.

The first step was tracing the lines from the picture through carbon paper onto the white canvas. Then, our instructor handed me a black marker so that I could go over the tracing lines and said, “This will help you not lose sight of the design while you’re painting.

Ready with my pallet of paint and step-by-step instructions, I dapped the brush in the first color and turned toward the canvas. Many sections needed to be painted, but I focused on one section at a time, careful to stay within the black lines. Each set of instructions directed me to paint in different areas of the canvas.

Satisfied that I could proceed, I encountered my next challenge: blending. This technique scared me because I was afraid to put two separate colors on the brush for fear of losing the distinctness of each color. Blending blurred the security of those black lines I’d carefully traced earlier. I had a terrible time blending!

My instructor picked up another brush and showed me with her expert hand how to blend a little of each color on the brush. As she blended, the black lines disappeared but were replaced by the glorious melding of this-and-that color, which was much more in harmony than the hard edges I wanted to hold onto for my comfort. She explained that blending was essential in painting because it creates interest and depth when two colors twist together without losing their individual qualities.

In life, we create a picture in our minds of what we think our lives should look like. We picture a specific type of job, house, or family. We fall in love with that picture because we believe it will make us happy. So we set about to create that picture on the canvas of our lives, carefully following the rules we think will produce our desired image.

Yet, life doesn’t stay within our neatly drawn lines. Jobs are lost, the doctor delivers bad news, till-death-do-us-part ends in divorce, or your teenagers tear apart your heart with their rebellion. Our human impulse is to use control to push everything and everyone back into place.

How do we hold the good and bad and trust God with both?

Thankfully, God specializes in blending!

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.”
Romans 8:28 NLT

I’ve heard Christians refer to this verse as a promise that God squares up everything sad and wrong in their lives. But this verse isn’t an individual promise; Romans 8:28 is a full-picture reflection of the goodness of God, who has seen the full scope of human sin, pain, loss, death, and grief, and He promises eternal healing and restoration for humanity in the end. It’s hard to see the complete big picture of God’s eternal plan because our lives are limited. One scriptural author observed this:

“Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end.”
Ecclesiastes 3:11 NLT

At one point, I became confused when I compared my painting to the sample because there were so many lines. The art instructor offered an important insight: “When you’re painting up close for a long time, it’s important to take a step back to see the entire picture.”

She was right! When I took a few steps back, I looked at the whole picture. I could see all the different colors popping with visual interest. The pinkish red contrasted with the lapis blue. I assumed that the titanium white didn’t have much to offer because I was painting on a white canvas, yet the brilliance of that color added a highlight effect that made the other colors pop.

Just like I had to step back from my canvas to see how the entire picture looked, Romans 8:28 assures us that God sees the complete picture of time and humanity from before the world began to our eternal forever.

When our picture of how we believe our lives should look starts to change, we can take comfort in God’s blending power. He can take what’s hard and heartbreaking, the broken and the beautiful, and somehow, in His way, God brings meaning, purpose, and even peace.

We don’t have to fear when our lives don’t look how we planned because our Master Creator knows how to take our messed up and messy lives and make a masterpiece.

Barb’s new book and Bible study, Stronger Than Stress equips you to win the battle of stress and overwhelm with ten spiritual practices that teach you to live with less stress and more peace every day.

Your Name Is Not a Mistake

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I’ve never liked my birth name – Ligia.

No matter how hard I looked, I could never find my name on personalized pencils or toothbrushes. Ms. Molly from Romper Room always kept me waiting, never calling my name while looking into that silly mirror. My name also sounded much like my father’s, which felt like a punishment. The sound of my name has triggered so many painful memories and hurtful feelings. There was only one tone in which I ever heard it said: loud and demeaning.

My name was also too complicated to pronounce. Correcting people’s mispronunciations is uncomfortable for me. As a Latina, I was raised to believe that children should be seen and not heard, so correcting anyone, especially those older than myself, was never an option.

Over the years, I have experimented with different names, hoping to find one that would suit me — one that would help me fit in while still highlighting aspects of myself that I was hesitant to celebrate. After much searching, and at the suggestion of a resume workshop facilitator who advised me that my last name was “Hispanic enough” but my first name was too complicated for potential employers, I decided to adopt the name Leah. The facilitator made a valid point: people might avoid calling me for interviews because, as she put it, “Who wants to sound stupid on the phone?” So Leah stuck!

I have read verses like John 10:3 (CSB): “The gatekeeper opens it for him, and the sheep hear his voice. He calls his own sheep by name and leads them out.”

I have also come across Isaiah 43:1:

“Now this is what the Lord says—
the one who created you, Jacob,
and the one who formed you, Israel—
‘Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by your name; you are mine.’“

But I questioned whether I truly believe that God cares enough about something as seemingly insignificant as a name. After all, there are likely more important matters to Him in the grand scheme of life, right?

On a podcast, I was once asked if I knew the meaning of my name, Ligia. It struck me that I had never looked it up before. The question caught me off guard, so I quickly turned to Google to find the meaning. As I read, tears began streaming down my face. Emotion overwhelmed me. 

All I could utter was, “He knows me; He knows me by name.” 

The name I had long avoided embracing unveiled the truth about who God created me to be.

Ligia means “clear-voiced” or “sweet loudness.”

The gifts and talents He placed within me, along with the vibrant tone of my voice, were never insignificant. And though those entrusted to love and care for me may have overlooked or spoken against my worth, my heavenly Father never missed a beat.

He always knew me.

I had often associated my name with negativity, but at that moment on the podcast, I realized it had a purpose, starting from the moment I drew my first breath. Despite my hurts, sins, failures, and shortcomings, God chose me. And He chooses you, too, friend!

While the enemy may call us by our sins, God calls us by our names — not just our earthly names, but names that He has given us: Chosen, Loved, Seen, Forgiven, Whole, and many more. He created us in His likeness, redeemed us, and called us by name as His children.

I’m not sure what names or labels you may have carried throughout your life — perhaps not a replacement name like Leah, but terms such as rejected, broken, abandoned, alone, unloved, or lost. These are just some of the identities the enemy would have us believe are better alternatives to the one God has already given us: daughter.

I pray that you will embrace and live out your God-given name today and walk in authority as His daughter.

Regardless of what the world calls you, remember that you are His.