The only part of launching my blog I didn't enjoy was coming up with something for the unavoidable "About Me" section.
Despite the fact I was blogging about any and all aspects of my life, summing myself up in a few sentences seemed daunting.
I wasn't a wife or a mother. I had already given up my career and taken on a disability status. As I think is true with most people, I felt like I could say who I wasn't much easier than who I was.
Rather than mess with it, I wrote instead about what I wanted the blog to be for people. One of the lines was this:
"This blog is about me, my life, my disease and learning to adapt to the changes life throws at all of us…"
When I read it again recently, the concept just didn't sit right with me anymore. I remember typing it and believing it, but over the course of writing the blog my perspective changed greatly.
To me, adapting now feels a bit like a negative concept… like God and I have different ideas about my life, and by adapting I'm begrudgingly adjusting my view rather than surrendering to His. I've learned through the trial and error of life that I don't want to adapt anymore.
I want to be so present in my moments that adaptation isn't necessary.
I have an autoimmune disease that has gradually stripped me of life as I knew it. I went from being a healthy, outgoing, talented individual who dove head first into life, to a person permanently confined to her home. I am in constant pain with limited amounts of movement, energy, and severely limited abilities.
It didn't happen overnight, although sometimes it feels that way. Instead, I've spent the last fifteen years watching my life, as I knew it and as I dreamed it to be, slip from my grasp. I lived a number of those years fighting with all of my might to hang on to every piece I could.
I adapted sparingly because I had to, but I didn't like it.
My doctor didn't like my version of adapting either, when she walked into my hospital room and saw me working on my laptop. I was typing dictation of an interview I'd conducted from my hospital bed, so I could write an article for the magazine where I worked. And I was doing it while hooked up to IV's of steroids and antibiotics and Demerol. Yes, I was adapting to my situation, but not graciously. I was fighting for my old life every step of the way.
Now, don't get me wrong. Having a bit of spunk is a good thing, but the intention behind the spunkiness matters. I wasn't fighting to maintain my life because I thought it was in God's plan for me. I didn't push myself because it was in my physical or mental best interest. I fought because I was stubborn and wanted my life to be the one I had planned. I was adapting as a compromise between my desires and His.
And there should be no compromising when it comes to God's purpose.
So, I've changed my thinking… and it changed my heart. Just as much as I would embrace a miracle of healing with open arms, I choose to embrace all that comes into my life the same way. I've learned to embrace the pain. Embrace the solitude. Embrace the constantly changing plan of my day as my pain and energy levels fluctuate.
I've stopped trying to adapt between what I want and what I have…and I've learned instead to want what I'm given. By removing the expectations I placed on my life, I've come to appreciate the moments He's entrusted to me.
It doesn't make the journey easy.
But it does make it worthwhile.
There are lessons in the pain. There is discovery in the solitude. There are blessings in the opportunities that have come because of my limitations. I've learned to love hearing about what's going on in the world outside of my home as much as I loved living it with my friends.
I see every moment of my life now, both the difficult and the joyful, as moment to be embraced. Because I know that God is in the middle of all of them. He is in the center of my storms and my blessings. He sees it all with eyes that know and understand and foresee the purpose of my situation. And I want what He wants.
So I no longer adapt, compromise or adjust. I surrender. I simply trust that whatever is in front of me at any given moment, He is in the center of it.
And there's no place else I'd rather be.
Leave a Comment
Katy says
“I’ve learned instead to want what I’m given.” wow…that line is doing a number on my heart and I SO want my thinking to be changed to that.. love this post and your heart!
Melissa Brotherton says
This was beautiful. I have no words. Thank you.
Hannah says
Thank you for your honesty. This article really touched me. May you continue to experience God in the middle of it all, may He be your comfort, lover and reward. He’s all we really need.
Corie says
Your post touched me to tears. Thank you for opening your heart to open my eyes. Surrender not adapting, makes so much more sense. Showing our love for God in trusting Him.
Your grateful sister in Christ,
Corie
Prudence says
Sara, you are a remarkable woman. And from the confines of your home you are touching so many lives.
Jessica says
Beautiful Sara. And the article too. Surrender vs. adapting…there is something in the difference for each of us.
Theresa says
You did good!! Such a beautiful picture surrender is!!
Shannon says
Tears are slowly falling…not ones of pity or sorrow, but of pure thanks for who our God’s making you in every moment that you continually surrender. This post? A gift to many. You, in any shape? A gift to all of us.
Ruth says
I believe you wrote this post just for me… and don’t tell me otherwise because I won’t believe it. 🙂
Be ever so abundantly blessed!
Ruth
Dee says
Surrender is difficult especially when you have vivid dreams as to how you want life to pan out. Yet…it is best to just let go and let God. Thanks for the reminder…I get stubborn a time or two myself. I’m trying to surrender and find myself in the midst of His love knowing exactly how he wants me to serve.
Daelee Huey says
Thank you, i really needed this. It sounds so much like you are talkin just to me. I believe sent this to me on thisday via Dayspring Devotionals. Surrender not compromise or adaptind. Thank God!
Darlee
Mag says
I read it just in time Sara.
Thank you LORD,
thank you Sara.
Kristi Fornshell...pagan43 on the twitter says
I am very touched by your story,as I struggle each day with ulcerative colitis and fibromyalgia.
It is so difficult to plan ahead for anything,as you cannot know what each new day will bring. One thing which is hard is to explain to even those closest to us is exactly how we feel both physically and emotionally.
Your feelings are dead on. Self pity is just NOT in the cards if we stay positive ( and FEISTY ) and if we rely on our faith.
Thank you for strengthening my quest to do both.
Kristi
Suely says
Hey Sara
You are a Rock Girl. You are showing to all of us how beautiful and noble is your attitude never blaming our Lord for anything in this world, even when we can not understand His purpose. I know,as other reader that life has not beeing easy for you, but all of us have very hard moments to scalate. The lesson that you left to me today is: GoD is always in the center of our storm.
I will keep you in my prayers. I am sure that our Loving Jesus has talked a lot to you, in a very nice experience that is not easy for you to put them into words.
WE ARE CHILD OF GOD> HR LOVES US!!!!!!!!!
Norma says
Thank you Sara for sharing what the Holy Spirit is teaching you. I cried while reading your experience in surrender because I have been there for many years(75 yrs old)and still learning. My physical problem is different, but it changed my life of “doing”: the Holy Spirit became real to me and has taught me to be a “be-er”. The word says we are “earthen vessels” and Christ has been placed in us to manifest through us. When we are so busy being a “doer” how can He live His life through us?
Your sister in Christ, Norma
Deb Fredette says
Sara, I too have learned through suffering how to just accept whatever God sends my way. I surrendered my life to Him but it wasn’t until I fully accepted my life as it was, that I found that peace that surpasses understanding and joy in every trial. It is so freeing, I pray this all of you.
God Bless,
Deb
Monica Isacson says
Hi Sara,
Thanks for sharing the lesson that you have learned through your sickness. After reading your blog which was sent to my e-mail address I felt in some way as if you was writing about me a little. I was in a situation where I woke up one day with this severe pain in my back and that pain brought me to my knees over and over again, I was admitted to the hospital 4 times in one year, have taken every pain medication you can think of and I mean drugs that was so strong I could not take them at times and go anywhere. I thought for a while that I was being punished so I was made to suffer. I was at the stage of my life that I could not even put my own clothes on at times, I could not sit, laydown or stand up properly, I would cry day and night, but When I could by the grace of God I would go to church try to go to work and try to do soemthing for myself….the one thing I did not do was to give up, I constantly prayed and last December God delivered me and the doctors finally figured out what was wrong with me. My back is now pain free and I am off all the pain medications which was causing me so much problems, I am now able to walk,bend, sit run if I have to after a whole year of not being able to do so….thank God for his saving grace I can now put down my walker and I can truly walk again, so I am with you I have surrender all…..Praise God. Keep the faith and keep on keeping on, may God continue to bless you.
ap says
today is my 35th birthday and i am sick and childess and no husband, but i too am learning to accept the life that GOd not I has planned be strong.
Debbie says
Thank you, Sara, for helping me think about surrendering instead of adapting. I love that! There’s alot more peace in it . . .
love, Deb
Char says
you’re saying what i’ve wanted to say, but couldn’t find the words for until now. i’ve found that kind of surrender has to happen on a minute by minute/second by second basis some days, while other days it’s on a daily basis.
Vitalis Nnebue says
Thank God for making it possible for you to share this. All I want to tell you is that the God I serve is still in love with His children. He doesn’t want this for you. He doesn’t lack the ability to restore you completely. And it is never late.
Visit http://www.vpa-tv.org and get in touch immediately. Your time to testify has come.
Reject the lie of the enemy that you should adapt to his affliction. TRY MY GOD!
Pol says
Beautiful post! You inspire me every day
Dok says
Thanks for this, Sarah! I have fibro, lupus, and mixed connective disorder and understand about the pain and the need as one said just to “be.” God shared with me recently through the Holy Spirit that the purpose God made man was to live in relationship with Him. It would not matter if I could not speak, hear, or move at all – as long as i have my mind and heart, I can fulfill my purpose which is to be in an intimate love relationship with Him. For taht and for your devotional today, I thank Him…
Jessica Turner says
Sara – You inspire me more than you will ever know. Thank you for sharing your heart. xo
Theresa says
Your post is very humbling for me. I want to surrender instead of adapt also. I pray God will help me see the difference every day. Thank you for sharing your heart. You inspire so many…
Kelly Lewy says
Sara, wow, you are amazing. You did not say what autoimmune disease you are suffering with. I also have autoimmune diseased and it is not easy somtimes. Your faith in god is what will sustain you and encourage you. I will pray for healing and enlightment for you.
God bless Sister.
Jenni Saake "InfertilityMom" says
How on earth have I not managed to come across your website or any of your writings before? While I am (only by the grace of God, and I’m still in awe that God has allowed me these blessings) both a wife and mom now, I could relate to nearly everything else you wrote. I’ve lived with Fibromyalgia since I was about 15, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since I was 18
(nearly 20 years now) and recently tested positive for the XMRV retrovirus (same family as HIV) that I’ve likely has since I was at least 8. I was nearly totally bedridden from 1990-1992 and again for about half a year in 2007, with various degrees of ability off and on since then, but always well within “disability” qualifications (though I cannot draw disability from social security because I have never been well enough to enter the work force and pay into the system).
I’m headed to find you on Twitter and to read through your blog. Would love to have you visit me at http://www.HarvestingHope.blogspot.com and http://www.InfertilityMom.blogspot.com if you ever would like to drop by. I’m prayerfully asking God to open doors in His timing to help me write a book on the life of Paul and his “thorn in the flesh” and would love to pick your brain on these topics as well! Thank you for your perspective on Godly surrender. Praising the Lord for the way His strength shines through your weakness!
Tebe says
Thank u Sara. Your life truly reflects the scripture which says ” The Lord Chastises those whom he Loves”. I will say we are so privileged how God deal with us all. In pain He comforts us. And in victory, health and wealth, He teaches us to be humble. And above all He ensures we don’t compromise our eternal destiny in as Joint Heir with Christ Jesus.
JD says
Beautiful wisdom, Sara, and we’re blessed to have you share it with us.
Ligia Fleckenstein says
Dear Sarah,
Thanks for sharing such a touching story. I have to command you for your surrendering your sickness and your life to God that way. It certainly isn’t an easy thing to do. God will without doubt compensate you for your trust in Him.
God bless,
Ligia
Teresa Miner says
You are a truely inspirational woman and have a beautiful gift of sharing your heart that touches my heart profoundly. I also struggle with autoimmune disorders and I struggle to let go and let God work in me. I want to surrender to Him completely so He can do His good purpose in me. I will pray for you and ask you to pray for me and others. May God continue to bless you and sustain you.
TRussell says
Thank you for such a postive,uplifting view on your life. It made me stop and think, it isnt about what we cant do of dont have, it is about what we can do and what we can share with others. God meets us as we are, what a blessing. In His grace we can live and rest, thank God for all he has given us, so that we may share it with others and encourage them on this journey we share together!
aimee says
Sara – Thank you so much for sharing your story and teaching me about surrender. You are so strong and inspirational! I pray that God will continue to use you for His purposes and have strength & courage for daily life. You are in my thoughts and prayers!
Elaina says
“So I no longer adapt, compromise or adjust. I surrender. I simply trust that whatever is in front of me at any given moment, He is in the center of it. And there’s no place else I’d rather be.”
Powerful words. Especially the surrender part. I have lupus. And while it’s relatively mild compared to what many deal with, its certainly changed my life.
Thanks for sharing this. I am not very good at this. But I’m working on it.
Cherry says
Hey Sara,
A lot of wisdom in your words. In the darkness remember this light and love God has given you. Don’t be afraid to dream with God. He has something beautiful for you.
TRussell says
to the beautiful woman that posted today is her 35 birthday, happy birthday, you are loved and valued and a gem in Gods eyes! i send you prayers for health and healing, and all good things. may God Bless you as you celebrate another year of life! Mark 11:24
sheryl says
you already know i love you. you already know that i am going to find a way to get to iowa. (wow, what fun the two of us would have..ha)
thanks for this line “i’ve learned instead to want what i’m given”. i am crying as i type it, that’s not me, i am still fighting. i wonder how sweet true surrender really feels.
you inspire me.
Sara Frankl says
I’ve been trying to figure out a way to respond to each of you, but this will have to do for now. 🙂 Thank you for showing up and reading, and for all of your kind words. I’ve gotten so many emails today from so many of you who are struggling, and I just want to make sure you know that you’re not alone. It’s a daily process, one that many of us go through, one that many of us find joy in the midst of. I’ve learned since starting my blog that there is nothing that helps more than the support of others, and I want you all to know I will be praying for you.
To answer the question of a few: my disease is called Ankylosing Spondylitis. It’s a genetic autoimmune disease that affects everyone differently, but is systemic so can affect many systems as well as fuse joints [particularly the sacrum and spine]. But many different autoimmune diseases have similar symptoms so I am sure many relate in different ways.
Marla Taviano says
You are so awesome, Sara. Every single day you inspire me to be more of who God wants me to be. Love you!!
alece says
i know i tell you this all the time, but it’s true. i learn so much from you, fritz.
and while my story is, of course, extremely different, i find myself at the crossroads of adapting and surrender. and as i read your words, all i keep thinking is HOW?!
how did you learn to embrace the pain and the solitude and the ever-present change? how did you stop trying to adapt between what you want and what you have? how did you learn to want what you’re given?
i need to do all those things, but all i can do is stare tear-filled at the screen and ask HOW?
Jacque Phillips says
Hi Sara, thanks for sharing I have Lupus for 20 years now. To God to be the Glory,great things He hat done and still doing for me. Much Blessings to you. Jacque Phillips.
asha george says
dear Sara,i see that u are an inspiration to many and would like to encourage u. much as it is essential to surrender our all to God, He has made available His resurrection power in us
through the gift of His Holy Spirit. Don’t let people talk u out of your essential fighting spirit against sickness and disease to see complete recovery either by using(speaking in faith) God’s unfailing promises for you in His Word over your life. Also check the side effects of medication u r taking. take the medicine of God’s word as per the Greatest Physician’s instruction.
It is the thief that comes to steal and kill and destroy. Jesus said,” I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”(Jn.10:10)
Matt 10:1 He called his twelve disciples to him and gave them authority to drive out evil spirits and to heal every disease and sickness.(NIV)
Mark 9:23
“‘If you can’?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for him who believes.”(NIV)
what would u have Jesus to do for you… He WILL for on the cross He carried ALL our infirmities and bore ALL our sicknesses and by HIS stripes u ARE healed. u may want to visit http://www.awme.net
read some articles and ‘NEVER GIVE UP,GOD IS FAITHFUL’….asha,India
Andre Gerard says
Dearest Sara,
I’m writing all the way from Singapore. In this time of Lent, leading up to the celebration of Easter – your blog reminds me of just how wonderfully good and gracious God is to us – even when we think that we’re having a difficult time. It’s so close to our faces, in fact in our faces, that God is with us in every difficult step that we think we trod alone. But indeed He is with us every step of the way.
From the bottom of my heart I thank you for your sharing and reminding me not to adapt but to adjust. You have already been blessed with His Grace, Mercy, Love and yes – Joy.
I wish you the Joy of the Resurrection of Jesus at Easter.
Andre G J A (Singapore)
Janet Macleod says
Hi Sara, Have you read the books by Jennifer Rees Larcombe. She is british and has been quite challenging to me in my illness. In 2006 she wrote” Journey into God’s Heart ” others by her are Turning point and Unexpected Healing. Her main theme is itimacy with God at all costs. afor me they were very challenging.
Leslie says
Thank You Lord, for showing Sara these blessings and helping her to share it with all of us. Sara, as a fellow sufferer of autoimmune disease, I send you (((hugs))). I will keep you in my prayers. God bless you!
Krystle says
Sara,
Like many other’s, I too feel you are writing my story. I was in a car accident when I lost the 4 lower disc in my back and had to have many surgeries which two were full back fusions with rods and screws. As a result, I lost my career and my boy friend of 12 year’s and a tom of friends from work as they forget about you once you have been let go after 6 months of missing work. I suffer from so much pain myself not being able to sleep and walk without a walker at 37 and then to go through menopause due to the shock and get fibro. as well. I can say I have felt the same way for a long time, was God punishing me as well? I did not get to have the baby I had dreamed of having and no husband still while the entire world goes on without us… I felt so alone physically. and the weight gain and now I suffer from a condition that causes me to sweat so much that at times between all of the above as well as losing my hair from all of the morphine and fentenyl I am taking I wonder if I will ever find a human companion or not.. I guess time will tell, however for as long as we all keep our faith in God and pray for each other and keep reading the word then we should be remember to be thankful for everything we do have. I feel blessed still in different ways and I can see you are blessed as well and you have touched so many people with your story. So thank you for reminding us all to just surrender rather then adapt and yes, keep on keeping on as it could all be much worse.
God bless you Sara and all of our sisters and brothers who are suffering in pain. I love you all.
Robin ~All Things Heart and Home says
Love you to the moon and back…
Kaycee says
You are such an amazing person – and so inspiring to me as always. I love that you share the journey to where you are today. I think it is easier to understand HOW you can be the way you are and HOW you can surrender when you share your struggle to BE that way. In an extreme situation where I would fight too you find such joy. It inspires me to find joy and surrender in my life as well. So thanks. 🙂
CC says
No words can describe how I felt when I read your blog.It seemed like God is talking to me through your words.Thks for the inspired message.
Vicky Westra says
Love seeing you share your words here! Beautiful Sara!!! Love this, love YOU!
Julie Garmon says
Beautiful post, Sara. Thank you. And thanks to Robin for linking this to FB. 🙂
Becky G says
Sara, I thank God for leading me to your posting today. I also have an autoimmune disease that has changed my life dramatically, and I have also had a hard time with the whole adjusting vs. surrendering thing. Your life story – told straight from your heart – touched me and gave me direction. Praise GOD!! Sharing your story with my friends and family will help them understand my life’s challenges much better. You explain it so perfectly…thank you. I have had a hard time putting it into words. I feel so alone at times, but it is moments like this – randomly coming across your story – that I know God is right beside me every step of the way – if I will just look up! (Nothing happens just randomly!) Prayers and blessing coming your way, Becky
Judith Powell says
Sara…THANK you for sharing your revelation with us…..you will most certainly be prayed for as I have dealt with pain myself (pelvic congestion syndrome,varicoe veins and addiomyosis (sp?) ) that has caused me to “miss” certain things in life…….the LORD is on HIS throne…HE will use this for HIS glory, as HE alreday has with your blog and your willingness to share….Blessings and prayers…J. Powell
Ruth Tilley says
Dear Sara,
Thank you for sharing your heart. I too have a a redirection of my life. I must truthfully admit that I was adapting and resentfully so. but somewhere along the way I learned to “be” as Norma said, and in “being” found that lost relationship with God, that an every day life had crowded out. Thank you again for a glimpse of your heart…I find new ways each day to reconnect with the world outside. Sometimes the loneliness and isolation is more than can be adjusted to anyway…but God is still there,so patiently waiting to comfort me. Aren’t reminders from other sister’s and brother’s in Christ so wonderful? He speaks in so many ways… How is it that we still can’t hear at times? I thank Him everyday for my disability…for the thing that brought my close relationship, to Him, back.
Yours in Christ,
Ruth
Cheryl says
Thank you, Sara, for sharing your life. I’m all choked up because I know God wanted me to read this today. Be blessed as you surrender. That is the true love of God.
Love in Christ,
Cheryl
Lolita says
I have also suffered with chronic pain but I refuse to embrace it. I know that it didn’t come from God to make me stronger because I know that we have an enemy according to John 10:10 who comes to kill, steal and destroy and a Savior who came that we might through Him have life more abundantly.
As you surrender your thoughts unto the Lord this means that you are going to think and meditate on His promises, not on your condition or your circumstances, because when we trust that God is greater than our situation this is true faith.
His Word teaches us to not lean to our own understanding but to acknowledge Him in all of our ways.
This is surrendering.
The fact may be that I am in pain but God has said that He sent His Son into this earth that I might be healed through His shed blood.
Isaiah 53:5, 1Peter 2:24 I believe this and this is what I will embrace.
It’s our faith in what God has said in His Word that gives us the ability to receive healing.
Meditate Matthew 9:22 the woman with the issue of blood.
I pray that this helps.
God Bless
Paula Wilson says
What A Story . Its like my own . I have copd and have learned to be alone and grow in Jesus as my journey in life takes me hand in hand with him . ..God bless you… Paula
sister, in Christ. says
For Mrs. Frankl and all who have chronic health issues……..
Although Scripture makes clear many types of health issues, i struggled for clarity on what i had invited in and what was of God. Read a book, last year, which SCRIPTURALLY, set me free. I hope and pray, anyone who follows my recommendation on reading “A More Excellent Way”, by Pastor Henry Wright, will at the very least, be set FREE, from roots of illnesses and diseases, too! ***if it shakes and challenges what you have always perceived, you are not alone……just like a blind man, being able to truly see, for the first time.***
Caroline says
Thank you Sara.
Rita Baltasar says
Thank you for sharing . One of the hardest things to do is to surrender. I pray for the strength and the grace to be able to surrender to the Lord’s plans for my life .
The way you have shared your life actually shows that “to surrender” is actually a sign of strength. HE makes us strong when we are weak.
May you receive abundant grace to cover the pain!
Rita
Karen says
I have been questioning God alot. I have read everything possible to try to make sense of my life. I have suffered with fibromyalgia for 22 years. Always been active but the last 4 have been rough. This year I am in bed more than I am out. I envy you with friends for when my sickness got worst they left. As I read this blog the words “I fought because I was stubborn and wanted my life to be the one I had planned.” Talk about a gut check. You also said”I’ve stopped trying to adapt between what I want and what I have…and I’ve learned instead to want what I’m given.” How do you do that? I most stay in torment and I know it is me. I feel like Jonah but what ever the lesson God wants me to get I seem to be missing it. I don’t want to live like this anymore. I need help but there seems to be none except God’s word and your blog but I don’t know were to start. I see nothing good out of screaming and crying just trying to move. Thanks for listening.
mary semple says
What a brilliant idea to study the bible with others on your blog!
Mellie says
great post…I consider it to have been sent by the Lord. I’ve been praying the last few days about a health issue that has been wearing me out. I know I need to acknowledge that the Lord has His plans and they may not be what I had in mind.
Carolyn says
Sara, You are loved. Carolyn
Ruth Mutis says
hi Sarah
I have been ill with stomach pains, what I thought was an ulcer turned out to be gastrities, I had pains and aches all over my body and a herpes that didnt seem to go away, I was ill from top to bottom with overall aches, I looked at my lfie and my lifestyle and I had terrible memories of a horrible past that was depressing and shameful, one step at a time I started to change all that with the help of a bible, a church and worship music, the lord had sent people to help me and i took the opportunity cos a life in pain was not worth living for me, that is when i decided to become a cristian at least a more realistic one in my eyes. I have been healed of all types of illnesses. Feel a lot much better and now i can tell you that i wont go back to destroying my body with drugs and desruptive behaviour. My life has changed and even though I feel I have preogressed I still find myself lonely and in despair, i need love from my family and i cant never see them that makes things even worse. I feel like I am on my own, it os now that i need the lord more than ever and i think i will never live without God in my life otherwise I would be dead.
Jesus is the way the truth and the life, trust in him has changed my life greatly.
Cheryl says
Thank you so much for putting into better words than I have so much of how I feel. No matter how much we hurt, God makes something positive out of it if we let Him. Just read SURVIVING THE SIFTING OF GOD by Johnny Willis. Everyone in these shoes needs to read it. Bless you so much.
Connie Simpson says
I can’t fight back tears ! You have made my day
by sharing your “Beauitful” story !
To God be the glory, and may he continue to bless
you ! !
Sister Connie,
Karen Hart says
Blessings to you, Sara! God is gracious in giving us only what we can handle – in him. I’d like to encourage you to keep fighting for God’s will in your life – it’s far better than anything we could ever think of on our own. I, too, fight daily to allow God control of my life – my illness is Lyme Disease and it’s sad how similar it looks to yours and the rest of those who have posted here. I’ve had days/weeks of confinement to my home, crazy pain that makes no sense, fatigue that leaves me longing to do the simple things in life, neurological issues and stomach issues. It may sound crazy, but the specialists are saying that many with Lupus, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, ms, parkinsons, alzymers, lou gherigs disease, and autism actually have Lyme Disease in its mid to late stages. If you fall in this catagory, please feel free to get in contact with me. I’d love to help you as you’re helping and blessing so many others.
sumer says
thank you for the post
Becky says
This is beautifully written!
Scott Fehringer says
I stopped by to take a break from some chores as I was feeling a bit down…but now I am so ashamed…as I am so blessed and Thankful. You truly inspired me. Thanks and may God continue to bless YOU!
Yvonne says
We serve a holy and awesome God. When we give it all to him He turns it into something beautiful. At my church we are currently completing the 40 Days of Purpose journey through the Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren, so when I started to read and then saw the line “And there should be no compromising when it comes to God’s purpose.” I decided to continue reading the article and I’m glad I did. May God’s blessings continue to be yours as you surrender your all to him and bless others through your sharing. Thank you.
Linda Ray says
Sara,
I was blessed by what you said about being “so present in the moment that adaptation isn’t necessary.” I loved the entire post and can relate as I’m walking in the same journey of health issues that have drastically altered my lifestyle and ability to work full-time. God bless you.
Aly says
“I have learned instead to want what I’m given” Wow! Thank you for your transparency, your honesty, your humility, and allowing God to inspire others through you! I forwarded this devo/blog post to as many of my Wonderful sisters in Christ (and brothers) as I could think of.
Yes, and God IS in the middle of it all, and you can see that your heart IS to want what He wants! Thank you for sharing this so beautifully!! And for touching and changing our hearts and our attitudes (hopefully to be more understanding, empathetic, grateful, loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, gentle, faithful)
I also love what one commentator said about “Be-ing” instead of “Do-ing”.
Blessings, Prayers, and gentle hugs~
Bernadette says
Sara thank you so so so much! I felt as if God came into my home today to speak with me.. I have a situation coming my direction and i too was not surrendering the Way God wanted me too.. Now I see that compared with your situation although mine is very very life changing, it still does not compare with yours.. I pray God will enable me to embrace my situation the way you did…
You are an inspiration to all.. and especially to God…words could not tell you how greatful I am to your testimony!
thank you…..
Bernadette
Margaret Gaasch says
Sara, I know you wrote this just for me. How did you know this is what I needed today and all days? I have MS and what you have said is a real blessing. God sent you at just the right time. How does He know these things ? 🙂 Thank you, Margaret
Nena says
Your Times are truly in His hands. He’s not done with you yet. Thanks for your inspiring piece. God bless
Johanan Lafeuillee says
surrendering –
surrender to God’s plan. His plan is not to cause you pain or sickness. His plan is that he already healed by his stripes. Sickness is not of God or from God and God does not bring sickness to “teach” his sheep lessons in life. Only the enemy comes to steal, kill and destroy. I do believe that it is God’s will that you rest in Him Sarah, that you surrender to the truth of God’s word.
However, please don’t surrender to the status – quo of your physical disabilities. Don’t let the enemy lie to you that this has become your portion.
I am saying so because I was there like yourself. The tendency might be to journal the experience and “learn” as much as you could from it and all that is good. However, let God’s completed work be lived out in your thoughts and renewing of your mind. Accept, adapt to and rest in what our good Father wants for you, his precious daughter.
Christ has already done enough. His finished work on the cross is the authority by which I speak.
Merv says
Hi sara, I live in Australia and have just read this morning your testimony. I want to thank you for your willingness to share this. The older I get the more I realise that we are getting ready for Heaven. The Lord is good and He understands your situation very well.
There are times when we face physical pain, emotional and spiritual pain but our dear Lord takes our hand and leads us. I speak from experience and He has never let me down yeat and He won’t. Currently I am reading Ephesians. I have found this a great joy. May I suggest you read it again or get someone to read it to you.
I will pray for you every day. Love in Jesus Merv
Kathleen Morrison says
I am so blessed by your writing! Keep up your ministry, please, and I am here praying for you.Kathleen
Charles S. Lady says
“Dear Lord, some how be with Sara and her situation. Where ever each of us hurt and feel weak, may your grace move in and touch us all.
Let us never forget your Word is still alive and active and take the seeds of weakness and grow somethng into a new and living body. Amen!!!” Charles
Jeanne Bowser says
Wow! All these comments. Mine would be similar, surrendering, rather than adapting. Help me Holy Spirit. I’ve had a song in my spirit by Jacki Valasques, called “I lay it Down”. Reminds me of your blog, Sara. Thanks for being a blessing.
jo says
your blog was truly a gift for me. as a double amputee and triple bypass woman, all in 2 1/2 years, i know i have to not only adapt to a very different life than i had imagined, but also surrender to God and let his place for me to be embraced..
Patty Bourassa says
This was just what I needed. I am almost 72,diagnosed on 50th bday with MS. It has been a wonderful last 20 years,but then these last 2 years,not so. Trying(and sometimes winning!) to live with pain,no balance(scary!)and knowing its all going downhill,as it would,but also trying each day to offer it all up. Have a wonderful husband as caregiver and good kids/grandkids,etc. And friends……..oh what a gift they are. But still trying to get past the pain,tiredness,along with very bad “case” of restless leg syndrome. Some days,yes…and others,no. Thank you for sharing your story.
I really needed to read this.
ARLENE RAMDEEN says
I UNDERSTAND TOTALLY BEING IS A SIMILAR SITUATION AND MY WALK WITH GOD
I HAVE AUTOIMMUNE HEP AND WAITING FOR A LIVER TRANSPLANT NOW 2 YRS AND I AM SINGLE AND NOW 39YO. I WAS DIAGNOSED AT AGE 24 AND NEW MEDICALLY WHAT WOULD HAPPEN AS I WORK ON THE MEDICAL TEAM IN ICU UP TO 2YRS AGO
WAS INDEPENDENT BUT NOW DEPENDENT ON MY MOTHER AND FAMILY
GET THROUGH LIFE TRIALS AND BLESSINGS WITH GOD
FAMILY GOOD FRIENDS AND CHURCH FAMILY.
SURRENDERING IS MY GOAL BUT IT IS DIFFICULT AT TIMES
yuli says
Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experience. I’m especially touched by the phrase “Forgiveness is giving up the possibility of a better past” in your blog. May your talent in writing continues to encourange others. God bless you.
Jan says
Dear Sara,
If God Leads You To It, He Will Lead You Through It. I truly believe that.
On our 50th Anniversary my left eye burst and I had to have it removed. I now have a prosthetic one. I lost it due to the Shingles virus. Thank God it was my left eye and not my right one as my left eye has always been my weaker one.
Take care.
God Bless
Jan
patricia says
thks Sara n 2 all of u 4 yr inspiring comments. we all r in need of encouraging words especially in difficult times. God bless
tam says
if you ever have a moment when you feel you are not doing anything useful or impacting others…come back and read thru these comments, my friend.
oh, how God is speaking mightily thru you. your post is full of life and permission to live.
i love you so.
Anonymous says
Thank you Sara for your testimony…keep in mind that you have inspire others to don`t ever give up.
God Bless you!
If you wish to hear about my own story I invite you to contact me anytime.
H
Olga says
Dear Sara,
there are many more women with worser conditions than yours. The world you live in is much better…there is priviledge for the less abled and the diseased. In our country every single day someone or the other is dying due to lack of proper health care facilities…not that it is not there but there isnt enough money to get yourself a ticket to proper medications.
You are a beautiful lady : and i do get the dayspring emails always on my mail box. Am so glad you created this space for all to express and to view the expressed….
God Bless you and your friends.
Rob says
Thankyou for being faithful & writing this. I am in a very similar situation to you, since 1975, through all these years I had never looked at it quite this way. Today of all days I really needed this word, so again – thankyou.
Natasha Samuel says
Dear Sara, thank you so much for your insight. All of us are suffering one way or the other and emotional crippling is worse than a physical one. We all need to learn this truth and the sooner we do the easier it will become to face any situation. Having said that, don’t you think we need to understand what ‘surrender’ actually means? For sure it does not mean passive giving in to what is happeningnbut yes ‘in every thing give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ!’ God’s WILL is clealy stated in the Bible and we have to find that and surrender to that. Jesus came to give us ABUNDANT LIFE whereas the Evil One comes to steal, kill and destroy.
I pray dear Sara that as you submit to God, His will for your life will be manifested in your body too.
Baby Gaynor says
I am touched and inspired Sara..thanks for sharing. God Bless you!
He is soverign... says
sis Sara, thank you so much for sharing such a beautiful insight and a humble heart surrendered to God’s purpose…i am much encouraged…thanks again and may the Lord’s hand continue to touch your life in many amazing ways..
Glenda says
I too have an auto-immune disease (SLE), but as you said I started by learning to adapt to the situation, then realizing that God wanted me in this situaion to surrrender and leave it up to Him. For me surrender brings results. People see and are amazed when they find out I have SLE. Most of them thinks I look too good and I go about with a ready smile and you know what that’s because of my surrendering to God.
Rebecca says
Dear Sara,
It’s my first time here and your faith in God is really inspiring! May God guide you through and continue to reveal His love to you 🙂 Pray for you so that you’ll have strength!
Rebecca
Dawn Carter. Oakland, CA says
This was a beutiful article. As I’m typing tears won’t stop. It’s funny how God knows what to place before you. I too have an autoimmune disease, and like you I went from outgoing, and working to being confined to my home because of my disabilities.
Thank you for article, I now have something to go back to to help me.
Melinda says
I too am on disability at 36. I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and arthritis five years ago and instead of fighting for what I had which I was pretty mad I couldn’t teach anymore I dove into a pit of depression. I surrendered to the pain and fatigue and medication. Healing for me has been coming gradually and I think we all want the instant miracle. I have come to realize that God is healing me in His time as I allow Him to. The amount of smaller miracles that He has performed in me, my family, and those I witness to amount to so much more than the instant fix. I don’t take 12 medications anymore, I don’t walk with a cane. I am a mother of 4 and wife of 1 man who has never left me because I couldn’t be the woman he married. A sound mind as well. Now I am a minister and renewing my mind from all kinds of abuse prior to my marriage so I can allow God to use me to His fullest. Surrendering to trusting Him is a moment to moment task. My body may not cooperate sometimes, but my mind is being healed. God has renewed my youth and has a better plan for me! Glory to God!
Staci Donovan says
I can’t wait to share your entry “I surrender” with my class. We are studying “Lord change my attitude” by James McDonald. You are such an example of one who is choosing to express true gratitude in all things at all times…no matter what our circumstances. Thanks for sharing.
Debbie Mauldin says
I am a cancer survivor–and most days I am simply surviving. Thank you so much for what you said–as I believe I have yet to surrender what I was to God and allow Him to let me be what He wants me to be now. Until I do so, I will never know how greatly He can use me, and I will never get the peace I seek. I’m here for a purpose, even though the cancer took so much from me. I am still left with life–and I need to use it to glorify God.
Nancy Cox says
Hi Sara! This is the first time I have read In Courage. It just popped up when I was looking for something. I feel like God wanted me to read your article, because it sounded like you wrote it about me. I have had Lupus, fibromyalgia, osteoporosis, kidney disease, etc. for 20 years now. I have done everything my Dr.’s have told me to do & I only keep getting worse, after 12 major surgeries, many bones broken in my back, shoulder, legs, arms etc. spleen removed, blood clots, I could go on & on. I walk with a walker barely & hands & feet are all very deformed with the rheumatoid arthritis. I’m so sick of being sick & I don’t understand why when I try so hard to get better. I did surrender to God, but nothing has changed. I feel like I must not be praying right or doing something else wrong? Thanks for listening! Nancy
Keena says
I too have a life changing illness so your words are so comforting..I have been were you were at and I am prayfully trying to get were you are now… Take care
In His Love,
Keena
Tammy says
Your transparency has so blessed me today! I feel challenged and encouraged to continue walking this “less desirable” path in my life as it truly is…a gift from Him. Thank you for helping to lift the veil so that I may see Him!
Jessica says
I’m facing this lesson right now. Thank you for allowing God to use the gift of suffering He’s given you in order that you may help others. God bless you, Sara. Your reward will be great in heaven.
N.J. Webel says
Sara-I too am living with God’s decision on how my life will be, as my kidneys are failing and I await a future of transplant?, dialysis?,uncertainty for sure, death?, or whatever He deems appropriate. It’s hard not to be angry and seek surrender. Thank you for sharing your struggles. Not MY will, but His WILL be done. I pray for the grace to accept and adapt. In His time…N.J.W. 3/17/2010, 3:50PM
Jeanne Hammond says
Not sure why your blog came onto my computer today except that it was God’s intent. I, too, have an auto-immune disorder and it has also changed my life. A life I’ve wanted to have back for the past 20 years. I know I need to pray and be in the scripture, but find that I avoid it way too much. I love it when God isn’t confined to what we might have done in the past, but finds new ways to touch and reach us each day. I’m grateful for your words today……. much to commune with God about.
Thank you! Jeanne
Angie Tyson Martin says
Thank you Sara…GOD bless you for demonstrating through words what loving GOD enough to surrender to HIM is all about. Therefore surrender to GOD and resist the devil and he will flee from you.(James 4:7).
Love to you…forever and a day!
suzy sitkawitz says
Sara-Your blog touched me deeply. I was diagnosed with breast cancer last fall and have been going through treatments. I agree with you! Surrendering to His love for me was the best thing I could do! I have never felt so peaceful. It has not been an easy journey but I also know that I am not alone. There is no pit so deep that He is not deeper still! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Just know that he continues to hold you in the Palm of His Hand!
Suzy
Dory says
Dear Sara,
Thank you for your sharing. i am also struggling my desire and God’s plan. Doubt, fear and hopelessness strike me like flood sometimes,i just couldn’t control them. i cried to God for helping me. He comforts me with his words and later i have great rest. God is with us. We are just heavenly passangers on Earth. Let us be a blessing tool towards people around us. i pray for you. Dory from China. Shenzhen.
Priya says
Thanks so much.Your article brought tears to my eyes…
Love
Priya
Lydia says
Hello Sara,
Your real life story, just came at the right time and moment. I do also need to accept certain changes in my lifestyle. Thanks to you today, I pray to God to give me inner strength to live each day by day.
And God Bless you for being such an inspiration!
Lydia
Rev. Dr. Richard Allen Brown, Jr. says
Sara:
God is testing you just as He did Job. The devil is betting God that you will give up. By your comments, I see that you are a strong soldier. Your faith compares with the centurion that Jesus commended. You have elevated my compassion and sent it to another level. I pray that the Lord will heal you, in the name of Jesus, and restore you to be a mobilizwed solder to tell your story. God cares for you and will take care of you during your test time. To me, you have passed the test. I will stay in touch with you.
Rev. Dr. Richard Allen Brown, Jr. says
I made a mistake. The word should be mobilized. A mobilized soldier.
Luisiana says
Dear Sara,
Praise the Lord that out of your situation you have come to be light shining through the weary ones who got enlightened from your heart. Now I am learning to surrender myself to the Lord and forget to be a manager of my own life.
In Christ,
Susan Raab says
Have you been reading my journal??? We’ve been living the same life thousands of miles apart!
I have been to pain clinics but what you’ve shared made me feel that I’m not alone. There are different levels of disability due to pain and I have seen the same valleys as you have.
But there always is hope in the Lord. Not only to live each day with His grace and mercy, but for a full healing. Miracles happen suddenly, healings happen over time. Continue to Lean on HIM and Believe in HIM. Blessings my sister!
Patti Kauffman says
Thanks for your insight Sara. I too have found myself in continual pain and your perspective reminds me that God is in this too, even in the pain. I too have been fighting for “my life” but want dearly to surrender to His! Blessings!
Patti
Ces says
I was blessed by this blog. Thanks, Sara! 🙂
Paulette says
Thank you for sharing your life. My son was diagnosed with AS when he was 11. We have found the Spondylitis Association of America a great resource.
Ema Adama says
Sara, I think i find myself in a similar state of mind with you and will need a total surrender to go on in life. I have been full of life and dreams i will work any extra mile to achieve but i was diagnosed with afb a month ago and the thought of the infection makes me feel very bad. i am both psychologically and emotionaly down and my present financial needs havent helped issues.
holly timpson says
Evverything you wrote could have been me. Actually it seems so much like me its scary. You said something that really speaks to me. You spoke of embracing the solitude, I find that so hard to do. Please keep bloggig.
A Sister Who Has Lupus.
Holly
Anne Grace Idiedo says
Hi Sara, you are an inspiration to the many hurting souls out there. I personally had to learn to let go and let God take charge. Its in surrendering that we truly understand and experience what God’s purpose and plans for us are.Its so fulfilling knowing you are never alone both in good and bad times and like is promise to us is, “Never will i forsake you never will leave you”
God bless you.
Grace
Jenny says
i love this…it is such a lovely encouragement and gentle challenge
Kelly says
It is ironic yet liberating to realize how fighting the good fight of faith can only be won by surrendering. And that having nothing else but God can open our eyes to the truth that we actually have everything! Thank you for sharing this. May you daily find God’s grace ever sufficient for you. =)
Monica mtp says
This was encouraging to read, as I have a disability also. It relates to taking up our cross with the help of our Lord Jesus, and realizing that it’s not only the happy times that count. You might find help at my site at http://www.soulwellmall.com/health.html since sometimes the body has deficiencies that need to be addressed.
Terry says
Sara,I’m a nurse and I have to smile at the picture of you in the hospital hooked up to your meds and typing away, probably not paying any attention to the nurses who tell you you need to rest 🙂 More importantly, your post brings this to mind:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of God
You speak of abandonment to the will of the Father; surrendering your will to His, hoping in God. That’s poverty of spirit – I’m praying for you as I type this. God bless you with abundant graces.
Thanks for posting your story.
Priscilla Zielinski says
I too have an autoimmune disease, and have discovered so much in the solitude as well. It turned my life upside down! But it also led me to the best experience of my life. One day being so ill that I could not get out of bed I literally wanted to give up. God had a different plan for me, so He literally put His arms around me & I heard Him say “everything is going to be alright.”
I thought I had lost my mind.
I have gone into sort of a remission from my illness. I finally have a career that I love and I feel like He has so much more in store for me.
Thanks for sharing your story. It’s nice to know there are others that have been through difficult times and know that God is in the middle of the storms and the blessings. And I too choose to embrace all that comes into my life.
Many blessings to you!
Choose Joy | Rain into Rainbows says
[…] forward to March 14, 2010. This post, right when I needed it. Sara’s courage and love for her Father shone through in everything […]
A Song for Sara | Rain into Rainbows says
[…] I mentioned earlier this week, I first “met” Sara when I read this post of hers on (in)courage. It resonated with me on so many levels, and I just had to write her to tell […]