God has given me the precious gift of being surrounded by a multitude of amazing women.
I have friends that I admire on a daily basis for the way that they exemplify His character, His hands, His mouth, His heart.
This special blessing is not hidden from the Enemy. He knows these things about my life.
He sees the treasures I’ve been given to come in contact with so many examples of godly women.
He also knows the burning desire I have to please God, to be the best me possible, to fully live out my potential…
And oh, how the Enemy can work to twist my best intentions into something ugly.
Somehow, a sense of admiration for another woman’s caring deed or a godly charcteristic can quickly turn to comparison. This comparison feels justified because I’m measuring myself against all positive, God-pleasing qualities. Then, unconsciously, woeful comparison turns to jealousy and a niggling feeling of insufficiency because I’m not doing what they’re doing, and therefore, God (and everyone else) must be observing that I don’t measure up.
Though my mind doesn’t recognize that this is jealousy at first, the Spirit alerts my heart that something is amiss with her frustrated state.
Knowing I must seek a solution in His words, as always, there is gentle but obvious nudge if I pay attention (which often takes longer than it should), and freedom settles into my wound-up heart as I read:
“You are jealous of one another…
Doesn’t that prove you are controlled by your sinful nature? Aren’t you living like people of the world?”
-1 Corinthians 3:3
Paul was writing to Christians. He knew that they would be jealous of one another if they didn’t keep their perspectives focused on God, and was he ever so right. For when I am in unity with my Jesus, I am well aware of His specific promptings on my heart. I know when He’s asking me to do something, and I know when I’m putting pressure on myself to be someone else. There’s a stark contrast between His leading my life and my jealous desires to “measure up” to other godly women.
He reminds me that I can be blessed by seeing others follow Him, but I can’t be bothered by it. All that does is allow division, disunity, and just plain grumpiness to take root.
Oh, the freedom He wants to let me rest in. Sometimes, my overcomplicating of His desires for me cause so much pain and so much more work for my heart. If I can just remember to rest in His plan and gifting in my life, then I can be perfectly happy when I see him working Himself out in their lives.