I’ve spent many Friday nights alone on my couch with my good friends Ben & Jerry. Sleepless in Seattle, You’ve Got Mail, When Harry Met Sally. Yes, I could quote lines from those films as easily as I could quote scripture.
In my six years of singleness I served in ministry, traveled to foreign countries on missions trips, and spent money like the Prodigal Son. (Really, I had a shoe collection to rival Imelda Marcos.)
Though I was entrenched in church culture and freely felt the ability to dialog about anything, it was uncomfortable to discuss singleness and loneliness with married women because a very common response permeated almost every discussion. Oh, enjoy your alone time! Once you get married you will miss your freedom, they would almost always say.
I’d trade in my freedom and designer denim for warmth in my bed and the ability to cuddle with something other than my books.
I share this because I know I’m not the only woman who has felt this. (If I am, lie to me.) I speak to countless of women who desire relationships, but have nowhere to turn other than work, church, and the internet. I believe there is nothing wrong with any of those arteries to love, but why do we shy away from assisting girlfriends in finding the owner of their rib?
I’m not suggesting church become a religious Match.com, more than I am desiring the doors of communication to open wide. If Eliezer could match-make for Issac, if Naomi could encourage Ruth to take a risk, and if God’s beautiful analogy for the church is the picture of marriage, why not embrace single girls and discuss desires, demands, and dreams?
As a self-professed matchmaker, here are some tips to pass along to those in need:
And remember, being single is not a curse or disease! Be loud and proud in your singleness, utilizing your time for the glory of God. Do. Hard. Things.