our youngest son, matthias, turned 7 yesterday. 7?!
i can hardly believe my little one is 7. his legs are so long. he has playdates at friends homes {without me}. he reads almost anything. he wants to be a ninja when he grows up.
but he still comes into our room every morning for snuggles. and he is loves his blankie. and he hugs me all the time.
i love watching my boys grow. and if i am honest with myself, i think i love these days more than when they were smaller. i love having conversations with them. i love seeing how their minds work and what they are passionate about. i love being able to go on outings without a huge diaper bag.
but i miss their tiny feet and baby smell. and when i look at photos from the early years, my heart melts for those tiny people who needed so much love and care.
change is so good. change can be so hard. we can’t weather the change in our lives without hope.
Psalm 18: 1-2 says, “I love you, O Lord, my strength.
The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer,
my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge,
my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.”
what change are you going through right now?
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Just today I was looking through some old family photo albums and was feeling rather melancholy seeing pictures of old houses, old friends, and my brother who is now all grown up. I have always had a difficult time accepting change–however, the older I get the more I learn that it is a good thing. There is a time for EVERY season under heaven.
Change sends me into a panic, especially if its a change that I a. didn’t want or b. didn’t initiate. The entire past 12 months have been a year of change, panic and healing for me and my kids. December 2009-2 weeks before Christmas their Father moved out of the house, March 2010 I began weely counseling sessions because once he left and I could think of things other than those between me and him, my past flooded my mind and I nearly drown from it all. Through all of it I kept praying, kept turning to my friends (another change-I let them in on my secret life full of hurt), kept reading and and hoping that I would one day believe all that God said to me in his Word. My change now, is to rest in the comfort that I have been feeling for about a month now,. Continue to believe the truths that I have learned through my counseling and God’s Word. Focus on getting our condo ready to go on the market to sell so that the kids and I can be closer to our friends and church-this will also put them closer to their Dad’s side of town. I am comfortable being alone now but I would really like to meet someone/a man/ that God puts in my life for good reasons. To begin a friendship, its up to God to decide where it goes.
Lisa
i hate change. not sure why, since god has been faithful to me in every major change of my life! i’m pretty settled right now, but in august 2010, oh dear. big change at work and we changed churches after 17 years. i struggled. and cried a lot. but now i see god needed me in these places and is growing me here. oh yeah, i got a new vacuum cleaner at that time as well. i wrote about all that change here:
http://kendalprivette.blogspot.com/2010/08/eureka.html
i didn’t know you changed churches too! yes, lots of change friend:( this post was so good today, wasn’t it? like ‘the way of mothers’ I sent you…
I know that change is part of life and sometimes it is hard, but I have enjoyed each new phase of our journey. I am thankful for each step, blessing and even the hard times we have been through.
There’s a Rich Mullens song I love (okay, all of them I love) that goes: “Hold me Jesus, cause I’m shaking like a leaf. You have been my King of Glory, won’t you be my Prince of Peace?” He has been my prince of peace, I have walked with him 45 years. But now I’m shaking! It has to do with getting help for my homeschooled 10 year old daughter. That’s the change. Thanks for writing and for encouraging us to write back.
This heart of a mom. I never really knew of this special heart before I began reading the words of this community. How a little piece of your heart vanishes every day they get older, and how a new part grows. I’ve read so many moms now that I am getting it – in the incomplete way that a man can.
There is one constant for me – One Unchanging Constant. Almost everything else is transforming all around me. For someone who likes everyone coming in the same door, and sitting at the same spots – the familiar dance of life – all these changes – a smidge terrifying, But I’m there, I’m committed, determined, learning, making mistakes, growing. Change is almost good – maybe – darnit.
Change- my change is having to learn to be content in God’s story for my life instead of thinking the pages I CRAM in actally fit. I need to stop questioning why and tell God to “bring it!” He knows me better than I know myself and it is time I change my mindset and allow what I already it true to actually be!
Lisa… you are amazing!
I loved this Lisa…so comforting:)
Other then watching and wanting them to grow up, it’s hard to ‘let it happen’. So this is big change, but, we’re moving overseas long-term as missionaries too…this is pretty big change;) love the Psalms 18 passage…perfect today:)
The heart of a mother is such a beautiful reflection of the Heart of God. And as you faithfully raise your precious son in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, each stage bears such an incredible new “flavor of fruit.” As much as I adored them as infants, I cannot tell you how full my heart is right now as our 18 year old son is walking into godly manhood! As our 23 year old daughter and husband are expecting their first child and our first grandchild. . . As our 21 year old daughter matures before my eyes like it’s “time-lapsed” photography. . . And as the younger four are growing up, the hope and anticipation of the Lord’s Faithful tending of their hearts makes it so exciting!
Lisa, you see with eyes that help us find eternity right here in the everyday. Thank you for all that loveliness.
Awwww. Such a sweet post.
The bird pic is my favorite. I have a hard time with change, and especially when it is the kind of change that involves my kids growing up!
My oldest son has been away at college for a year and a half now and it stillnfeels like I am adjusting to a new life. It’s not bad…he’s blissfully happy and that makes it much easier for me to be without him here.
I do miss him though. I miss him so much. I’ve spent so much time reflecting and I know that I wouldn’t want him to be here at home….afraid to move on or unsure of what he wants. I like to view this confidence he has as a sign that, perhaps, I did something right as a mother.
I think that, if I’m truthful, what I really miss is having him and his brother and sister around all the time. I miss that stage of our lives. I miss being a younger mom with a younger family. While there is great joy and great fun and accomplishment in this stage of our lives, I miss the past.
I pray that God will make me who I need to be for this stage of our lives…helping me always to be the best mother and woman that I can be.
I think if I’m truthful, what I really miss is having him and his younger brother and sister
I hear you Lauren,
Sometimes I wonder why God gives us so precious a gift and then we have to let go of them. It is painful and difficult. It is also hard to grow older…
Change…my life is changing constantly since my marriage fell apart…but I love what you said about having hope! It truly is the only way to weather all that life throws at us. Thanks for a great post!
Change is good because life would be boring and we would never grow if things didn’t change. But that doesn’t make it any easier.
Bernice
Are you too busy to be yourself?
We had a move to the city where my husband works last September. This was a HUGE change for us, but has been wonderful. He traded in a one hour+ drive to 10 minutes. We have so enjoyed having time together as a family and focusing on what’s really important.
Oh How I loved this post. Change seems to be a constant for me…but what is also constant is the Hope that comes with it.
Speaking of change~My baby is going to be 26! Oh, how the years have flown. I really do remember details like they were just last week. Cherish each and every moment and write lots of the things down that you are sure you will never forget. Trust me-you do forget! I love each and every minute of our life!