Fifteen years ago this month, I found my seat on flight 857 from Philadelphia to Orlando. With me I carried two suitcases, $500, a one-way ticket, a tummy full of butterflies, and a head bustling with dreams.
It was my time. Time to assert my independence. Time to “make it” in the world. Time to stand tall and start fresh. Time to do things my way in a town where nobody knew my name. Time to reinvent that soft-spoken small-town girl. Time to fire up my career, dive into love and secure my footing on Happily-Ever-After Avenue.
Some say I was brave. Others are certain that I was nuts. Since the line that separates courage from crazy is thin, I probably stumbled from one side to the other until landing my bearings.
My heart gently quivers as I look back on the adventure that was nothing I had expected it to be, yet was everything I needed.
Disney World became my playground, I found a job, made friends and fell in love. And then I lost my job, said goodbye to many friends, and realized that my definition of love was skewed. I thought about giving up…about going home…until I realized that at least for the moment, there was no place to run. I was home. I realized that the leap I made took me to where I needed to be in order to make the next leap when able. Because life is about leaping and growing and finding your way as God’s light guides you from one home to the next.
Sometimes, home is a soft place to land and other times, home is a tough mess in need of restoration. One thing that home never needs to be is empty.
Is there a time in your life when you took a leap and it led you in an unexpected yet beautiful new place? What does home look like to you?
Angela Nazworth blogs at Becoming Me, while leaping and growing in her umpteenth temporary home this side of heaven.
Leave a Comment
Oh, girl! Absolutely YES! I took {my family} on a leap out of our hometown into *wide open spaces* 400 miles away, and it was hard and comes with so many emotions and thoughts weaved throughout my story. Mostly it is wrapped in this blanket of grace. You see, this decision cost us. It had consequences. Yet, it was used for such purpose and I’m astounded at how my Father covered us. We moved – owned two houses for a year – then one year later turned right back around and came “home” to where we were raised. My life became full circle and I became fearful that *ME* would get lost and I’d be a reflection of those who were a part of my “home” in my childhood years. I needed to learn how to trust. (gosh, I REALLY need to write about this on my blog!) Then, the most beautiful opportunity came our way and I learned about trust, and love and acceptance – and who God wants me to be – through the most amazing experience (which I have written about and it’s still up on my blog now, actually). You see, I’ve seen that “home” is truly wherever the heart is – and when the heart is attached to The Man who created us, it’s beautiful wherever we go (even if it’s hard and ugly) because He uses all things for such purpose. (ah, I could go on and on about this…and you’ve really tickled my heart this morning with your post!)
Rich blessings as you receive His gifts in your “home,” Angela…
Here’s the post I wrote recently about *home* and all I learned through our leaps:
http://arock4him.blogspot.com/2011/06/never-question.html
Angela…
You took the words right out of my mouth..I recently just relocated to NYC after 8 years in DC, and I think everyone either thinks I’m brave or insane.
Thank you for writing this post, it was the encouragement and the words I needed to hear today.
Bindu
Today I am actually in mid-leap. In the air. High. With that tickle in your stomach when you are about to come back down. Today is the last day at my job for me to be a SAHM. I’m scared. I’m nervous. And… we’re not prepared financially. The hubs hasn’t gotten that promotion yet. I don’t have everything lined up just so. But, God has pushed us off that cliff we’ve been peering off at… and I’m looking to Him to catch me.
Leaping… I don’t do it well. Both because I struggle with letting go of control (though I know I don’t have it) and because I don’t jump high ;P
My leap was not quite as bold, but nerve-racking some. I used an on-line dating service (Yahoo Personals) to find a husband.
At first I just looked , but then came the plunge to put up a”monicer” and tell something about yourself through questions. I changed the monicer once. Then just about ready to give up on ever find hubby – I told God that He would have to send Mr. wonderful into my life. Sure enough Mr. Wonderful, Douglas D. Williams, wrote me for 3 weeks. We dated 1o weeks and got married. That was 7 years ago.
I love this! I have taken many leaps!!!! I love that God has his children experience this… the fear of the unknown before the foot is lifted off the ground… and then the trust and fulfillment of a promise from an immensely loving Father at the other end of the leap. Thanks for sharing this.
Hi there,
I have a question about your site, would you mind emailing me back @ kthomas@primroseschools.com?
Thanks,
Kathleen
Getting a running start at my leap. Am grateful for your post and for incourage. I loved how you said that home didn’t have to be empty…a good thing to focus on as mine has been for months and will likely be for awhile. Yet even if I am living as a single person again, I don’t have to be alone. Thanks Angela for taking a shot at crazy and admitting us to us all. (Now I can point to you and say, “She did it first.” *wink*)
“I realized that the leap I made took me to where I needed to be in order to make the next leap when able. Because life is about leaping and growing and finding your way as God’s light guides you from one home to the next.”
This is exactly where I’m at! I made a leap last May when I moved to Nashville, only finding out 4 days before I moved that I got the job I interviewed for. This week I gave notice without having concrete plans in place. I have ideas and dreams and feel ready to take another leap, though it’s a blend of excitement and terror. I feel like God is going to show up in an unexpected way but I’m positive I would never have done this if I hadn’t decided to get out of my comfort zone last year first.
This made me smile and even triggered a little flutter in my heart. You have a way with words my dear-thanks for sharing.
I tend to leap too fast, too often, just ask my husband who is usually along for the crazy ride Lol. But it’s soooo much fun and each opportunity to leap gets me excited! Sometimes I think I leap ahead of God and that’s not good. Now if I could only decipher when it’s Him asking me to leap in obedience, and when it’s me leaping out of stupidity hahahaha.
Have a blessed weekend,
Sherri Ohler
http://www.sdgartistry.com
http://www.thepaintedlife.com
“Sometimes, home is a soft place to land and other times, home is a tough mess in need of restoration.”
{{nodding}}
You sure do make me wanna be braver about taking giant leaps instead of tiptoed baby steps. 🙂
Thanks for this — I needed to read it today. It’s never been hard for me to take big leaps but at the moment, I’m in the middle of a pretty big one that has me standing in a giant pit, looking around and saying… “Did I do the right thing?” And the reality is, I don’t know yet. But I appreciate the reminder that sometimes, there is no looking back because what is ahead is what is at hand and maybe what doesn’t look so beautiful for awhile can transform with new eyes. Thanks for your beautiful words.
My physical location has been the same city since before I was born. Although, I have had many, many mental/emotional locations that were elsewhere. Growing up where uncertainty was the only thing that was certain, I have found myself at home in the big leaps — or pushes as they often were for me. Whether by choice or by force, for me, learning to be happy, content in the moment, in the changes, is home.
My leap was more like a ker-splat. I had graduated with a master’s degree and moved back to my parents’ home for a few weeks while I was still interviewing. Only the big job never came. And then my mom had a brain aneurysm. I went back and collected my things from storage and brought them back with me. It was three weeks that turned into seven years, but in that seven years, I paid off student loans, and made a choice to follow the Lord in the path He had for me. On this side of those seven years, they don’t seem all that long, but at the time…
Oh, and my mom came home and went back to work part time about 8 weeks later, and has never had lasting effects of the aneurysm.
14 years ago, I left Florida and made my way to Texas. I grew up along the space coast and beaches, but when I left, I didn’t look back. I’ve been back to visit a few times, but even after one year, I knew that it was no longer home. Even when my mom still lived there, it wasn’t home anymore. And sure enough, I’ve only been back once more and felt like I was visiting a city I’d never been in before. Where I am now is home and I wouldn’t want it any other way.
Home. When you are married to someone in the military then “home” has a variety of meanings. Where are we living now? Where were we happiest? Where do we hope to retire? Where we were individually raised, but don’t go back often, if ever? My home is not a place. It’s not a location. It’s not even a particular house. It’s where my husband and children are. We might be there for a few weeks, a few months, or a few years. But we are together. We say our prayers, close our eyes, and the weary rest. We wake up refreshed, ready to face the world again. Together. That is home.
Ohhh sweet ladies…I have so loved reading your comments and definitions of home…