The mothering was easy on a January afternoon when I first heard her heartbeat. Life was all stretched out in front of her and I fell in love as she dipped and swam in her prenatal ocean. I longed to meet her.
She came in the warm of summer and those wide eyes looked at mine and wondered at the bright, noisy world. I relished the early days when the whole of her fit between my hand and the crook of my arm, so tiny. Then she grew, but still she needed to be close, all cuddled up.
Now when I look at her, eyes meet easily. No more bending low to enter her sphere. She is a young woman. And I must send her forward.
We parents are invited to write letters as our children enter high school. What do I say at the beginning of the end? The mission of these years is to move her on, to move her away from us. Script on a page cannot express the overflow of my heart as I send her to this new and unknown place. The language of letting go is not my native tongue.
The sand slips through the glass and I imagine that the demands of time, the growing older, even the saying good-bye–-these are not the ways of Eden. At creation’s dawn, time was not a commodity. All was kairos. All was good.
There are still four years–-years that will fly, then she will fly. But she will always be at home here in my heart. This is the way of a mother.
by Julie Ruegsegger @ tracing graceLeave a Comment
Sharon Gibson says
Very Beautifully expressed and poignant. I can so relate to this when I had to let go of my daughters.
Keep up the good writing!
Amy Hunt says
Letting go is so necessary, so freeing for your daughter, and your worship to your Father; for, yes–this is what it’s about. Oh, how I pray I remember this through the years in my parenting.
Rich blessings to you, Julie, as you continue to seek your Father in the ways of letting go…
The letting go process is so bitter sweet. As excited as I was and am for my girls (and soon my son) to go off to school, I knew there would be a hole in our family. Our lives the past 3 years have been a series of finding new normals. It’s hard, but oh so much fun to watch those little birdies fly and do well. God has so richly blessed us and answered our prayers for our children in awesome ways!
Letter to My Daughter | tracing grace says
[…] Letter to My Daughter Posted on July 11, 2011 by Julie I’ve been writing ever since my dimpled fingers could clutch those chubby Crayola crayons. While my kindergarten friends drew pictures, I scrawled words. Experiments of font and style, even as a tiny girl. My script was my outlet–the thoughts could flow unabridged and raw. I still write. I process life with my longhand. Yet I know that my words will pass away, bound by time as I am. My Father’s Word, by contrast, stands forever. As Matthew Henry writes, “The only way to render me, a perishing creature, solid and incorruptible is for me to entertain and receive the word of God; for this remains everlasting truth, and, if received, will preserve me to everlasting life, and allow me to abide with him for ever.” Still, I write–reflecting, though imperfectly, the image of the true Word. And, I find myself part of a community of women who love their Father, who trace out His grace with their words. And in a bold moment, I submitted a piece of my heart, and I got an unexpected message to my inbox–that others might want to read it too. So I’m over here today, writing (my mother’s answered prayer) and being brave: https://aws.incourage.me/2011/07/a-letter-to-my-daughter.html […]
Living the Balanced Life says
WHat a beautiful poetic writing! I am in the process of a final letting go of my youngest daughter. She is 18, has moved away to go to school into her own apartment, 3 hours away from us. We both knew she needed space and room to grow, so while it has been difficult (she has been out 5 weeks now) it has been good for both of us.
I just have to pray and keep praying that everything we ever taught her is still ingrained in her soul and that she will mostly make the right decisions, at least about the most important stuff!
Thank you so much for sharing!
Learning to celebrate your strengths
Danelle Townsend says
This made my heart swell.
I think the link to the post above may speak to your heart as well.
Love and blessings to you. 🙂
Judy Rapson Neff says
Cheering you on friend – in writing and mothering. No job so hard, so wonderful, nor with so much at stake. I too look with wonder at my 14 year old beautiful daughter and wonder if inhave mothers her well and how to mother her on…the time so short… Thanks for sharing your heart in words beautifully written.
Jennifer Jones says
Oh how I can share these emotions with you! Today, I sent my 12 year old daughter off to Chicago for her first mission trip. I couldn’t help but cry knowing she’s not my baby anymore, and learning so quickly to fly on her own. One thing I know for sure…they don’t forget their moms!
Karen Mendes says
That’s beautiful Julie.
I always thought you should do something like this.
I know goodbyes and transitions are always hard. You’re a treasure-she will always treasure you.
That old roomate.
Jean Yungfleisch says
Thank you for sharing this – I love your writing and sensitivity!!!!
Poptart 30C in water, 3 times daily!
Debbie Austin says
Very poetic said Julie~ it tugs at every “mother’s heart”. : )
Debbie Austin says
I meant “very poetically said” ~ I can spell! ha!ha!
Amy Sullivan says
Tonight I noticed my daughter was long. Her little body sprout upward is growing and her heart and head are growing with her…too fast.
Lovely post, makes me want to hug my girls.
Nikole Hahn says
I think I would have loved to have a mother like you. I had always dreamed of that kind of mother who would take an interest in my life and encourage me in my dreams.
Linda Howe says
This is beautiful. Blessings to your daughter as she moves on in life. <3
Samantha Burkyard says
Wow, you are a beautiful writer. Thanks so much for posting this, it reminds me of my daughter, Kaylee. Great job.
Oh how I love reading your words, Julie. Thank you for using your God-given gift to encourage and inspire others. Tears well up as I consider this ‘letting go’ process…it continues well into our daughter’s adulthood. And so we look to the One who let His own Beloved Son go because He loved us. And we can trust His purposes for our children’s lives, because He is a great God – full of kindness, compassion, forgiveness and love.