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Shifting our Perspective Back onto Hope

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Sunday night we had guests over for dinner and I didn’t clean my house.

There was an internal war inside of me – do I vacuum, dust and clean – or just let it go and focus on the cooking, the table, and the people who are coming?

Would I rather continue on with what had already been a peaceful day – or kick it into high gear, running around trying to make everything look “just right?” I won’t even mention what kind of mood that puts the whole family in. Did our guests even care? Or even notice?

To some people, this Christmas season brings stress, dread and worry. I think of Narnia without Aslan – “always winter but never Christmas.” We lose our focus as life gets hurried and complicated. We dash around doing things that really don’t matter (like cleaning my house before the guests arrive!), and then our perspective shifts. We get so caught up in our present circumstances that we can’t see beyond our difficulties.

I had been focusing all day on “hope,” as I’ve been feeling hurts and pains that people around us have been experiencing this season. If we lose our hope – what else is there? Where do we turn?

Some call it optimism, but when I look deep into the Christ-child’s eyes, I call it hope. It is enough assurance for me that I can put the dreariness of Christmas aside: money, commercialism, and even too much tradition, or making sure my house looks perfect to keep up an image that I have it all together.

We had such a great time with our guests. At one point I found myself looking down at the un-vacuumed carpet. For a split second I was embarrassed, but then I looked up into the faces of those around our table and my perspective shifted back into place.

It is through my faith, the basis for my hope, that my priorities are put into proper perspective. It’s not about the crumbs on the floor, the perfect meal, the latest table setting – it’s about the hope that resides in each one of us.

That’s enough for me.

If you are entertaining this holiday season, what one thing will you be focusing on before that first knock on the door?

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SandyCoughlin
About the Author

Sandy Coughlin is a wife & mom to three active teenagers, & author of The Reluctant Entertainer (Bethany House 2010). Based upon her inspiring blog, the book helps restore the lost art of hospitality and in the process helps women break free from isolation and into connection and deeper relationships...

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  2. Thanks for this wonderful reminder Sandy 🙂 I too drive my family crazy rushing to be perfect when people are coming! It’s just not worth it is it? Lol. Besides, who notices crumbs on the floor when the table looks as pretty as yours does above???
    Sherri

  5. I needed to hear this, Sandy! My house is never up to “entertaining” standards, but I love celebrating with others.
    Hmm, I wonder how clean the stable was when the shepherds visited the Holy family?
    Thank you so much for the inspiration!

  10. Love this. I deal with this every week when we hold our Weds LifeGroup at our home. I figure there’s no point in cleaning very much earlier than an hour or two before people arrive because otherwise the kids will just come behind me and mess it up. But that leaves me stressed out right before -or right up until, usually – the guests arrive and I’m in a sweaty tizzy when they get there. My husband is always saying, “don’t worry about it, no one will care.”. But I think I too often don’t really believe him. I’m so concerned that how I present my home is a representation of who I am. And I don’t feel the mess is ‘who I am’ at heart. It’s a sign of life in my house, yes. The clutter says my children are lively and well. The dirty dishes & crumbs on the floor are signs that I feed them. Maybe that says something too. Maybe something louder and more real for my life *right now*. So thanks for the reminder to keep it real. Keep the focus on more meaningful, eternal things. It likely won’t change someone’s life for my floor to be vacuumed & the paper piles around my kitchen. Shoot, maybe it will change someone’s life to see it NOT vacuumed – to help drive this very point home for someone else I’ve welcomed in my home. It’s about relationship. About sharing the hope I know in my heart with others. Thanks, Sandy!

  12. A few weeks ago we visited a friend who had been given no longer then four months to live. She talked a lot about the past, retelling story after story of the fun times. Her future talk was about spending as much time with her family as time would give her. She did mention some regrets but her house not being spotless was not one of those regrets. In fact her house was a mess the day we were there and she never said forgive me for not having a clean house. She was so grateful that we stopped by.

    She had an excitment in her eyes as she talked about meeting her Lord soon and shedding her frail body. Hope was shinning through her and it fell on everyone who talk to her. Walking out to our car her daughter told us, Mom is the one who is keeping us from falling apart, her hope is holding us up through this.

    We heard she did a few days ago and I bet her hope grew brighter as she got closer to the one she put her hope on. No one knows when their time will come but if we can live like today could be our last day we won’t spend worry about dust bunnies.
    My mother use to say, that dirt will be there when I am dead and gone. How right she was….the older I get the more I want to live in the moment and my hope is getting stronger daily and I am enjoying people more.

    Great thoughtful post…good one for this time of the year when we can spend all our energy into getting things just so so instead of saving some energy to give out to others.