I fling the bread dough up in the air, turn it over and flop it down on the pastry mat. I try to seal the creases. It has been a struggle, this attempt at baking bread. First, the yeast did not activate and I had to start afresh after getting honey stuck in a big clump of my hair. Then I could not get the correct consistency of the dough and I almost ran out of flour.
Sigh… Perhaps, the Lord did not call me to bake my own bread? I stretch it out on the pastry mat, tugging at it for all I am worth, pound and stretch it some more. I am hard on this piece of dough; near ruthless and then…comes His soft whisper.
“This is the way they treated my body”, He gently, sweetly, reminds me of His presence. “They had no regard for it; beat on it, tugged it, punched it…my body was treated with disdain.”
And then I remembered the days when I would make communion bread for the church. How I cherished that ministry. I would lovingly pierce the bread before I baked it, and as I did, I remembered His body pierced for us…for me. Next, I polished and washed the sterling silver tray, making it sparkle. Joyfully I laundered the old linen cloth to cover the bread as I took it to church and then set it before the congregation to partake.
Nevertheless I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love.
Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works.
Have I? Have I left my first love? Has sorrow after sorrow, disappointment after disappointment, caused this heart of mine to harden? I remember the days following my conversion when the grass sparkled brightest green and the ocean shimmered more glorious than diamonds. When the sky could not have been a deeper blue and wild flowers softly danced in the gentle breeze.
Lord, have mercy if I have.
He then beckons me to come outside and ponder all the beauty He has graced this fair earth with, for the winters are warm here this year. I already hear the song of the dove I so love, and the daffodils have poked through; irresistibly yearning higher towards the light and warmth above. The fruit trees are bud-swelling and spring-time like days would beckon me to pause and feel His pleasure and joy over me once more.
And then He whispers to me to sit at His feet and be alone with Him, for this is the one good thing in His estimation… And she had a sister called Mary, which also sat at Jesus’ feet, and heard his word. But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her.
Our relationship with God…So very important and that which cannot be taken away from us. It will keep our hearts tender; especially if we ponder Him in the Garden agonizing and then beaten, pierced and nailed for us.
And when we suffer grief or fear, let us remember that every step of pain we have to endure, Jesus blood-stepped up the road of Calvary before us.
Suddenly, I think the baking of bread a sacred thing once more and worth the effort. His body given for me…may I never esteem it lightly. The gift whose worth can never be measured; priceless, precious and when pondered upon through His eyes, able to make the heart soft and tender once more.
I am that bread of life…
Revelation 2:4-5; Luke 10:39, 42; John 6:48
Beautiful writing Elizabeth.
Thank you so much, Christy!
Elizabeth,
I will never look at baking, especially bread, in the same way again! Wonderful post and great words of wisdom!
Thank you, dear Beth…
I think it is easy to forget and so easy to put our relationship with Him on hold.
I am grateful He is so patient, loving and kind with us! Yes, baking bread can be a special time! God bless you!
Oh, Elizabeth,
What a beautiful picture of our Lord and what He has done for us. You are a beautiful writer~truly gifted by God.. And you remind us how much Jesus loves us, and desires us to be close to Him and know Him more intimately. Thank you for sharing this great post.
My dear, precious sister, Penny,
That is so very sweet of you! Thank you for the comments regarding my pen. He has been purifying me the past few years since we met. Especially this past year; the last eight months, and He has shown me that so many truly don’t know His heart the way He longs for us to (I didn’t).
So many with abuse issues or divorce and other things like death, or those unanswered questions that can haunt us if we allow them to.
And I believe He has set the course of my life more firmly than ever; ~that I may know Him~ is to be my goal. And if I can have the privilege of being used to help others along this same quest, my life will truly have been worth living…
Thank you for “hanging” in there with me the past couple of years! It is hard to believe it has been two years now, about since we met!
Love and prayers always, for you and yours!
Hello Sisters, Once again a beautiful post. Reminding me where my heart is and why. I was saved seven years ago in a really legaisitc church; baptized in Jesus name at the age of 51. My heart was not in the right place and neither was my mind. I judged people who did not belong to “my type” of church. Three years ago I was having a crisis of mind and heart. The pastor had refused to allow us women to have a Bible study and the women who said they wanted it did not show up. I felt betrayed.
I was deep in prayer and was led to a small church in my neighborhood. One Sunday and I knew I was home. I joined a few weeks later. I have finally outgrown the need to judge; trust my sisters and the pastor. His love is demonstrated every day and has been shown to me. Jesus died for us all not just for a select few. His precious blood is shed for all not just for those who obey man made rules. I love the communion service..it’s open to all; guests and all as it should be. I take part in women’s Bible study. This is the best thing that ever happened to me.. To be convicted of my sin and freed from it. I forgive the pastor and sisters of that old church and I love them all the more. Susan
Thank you for writing, Susan and for the kind words!
I am so grateful for what the Lord is doing in your heart! What you write, “His love is demonstrated every day and has been shown to me”, I believe is such a key. I personally believe, the more we are able to receive love from our Heavenly Father, the more we are able to love and forgive.
Yours is a remarkable story! To be saved at a later age and then to experience and overcome what you have is truly His grace and mercy demonstrated!
How special you must be!
“And when we suffer grief or fear, let us remember that every step of pain we have to endure, Jesus blood-stepped up the road of Calvary before us.”
AMEN what great reminder.
Wonderful post.
Thank you, Erin!
I think that what not only helps me, but endears me to our Savior is realizing that He has gone before and part of the reason our Father allowed Him to experience His own suffering was so He would know exactly what I am going through for He has been there first, so He knows how to comfort me in the midst of my pain…Through the years this has been very precious to me…and it has knit our hearts closer together…
What beautiful imagery. Communion is full of such symbolism, but thinking of the meaning of the preparations themselves is just so lovely.
There was no ministry I was blessed by more than making communion bread for the church to partake of. It was very precious to me and I wish I still was able to do it. I don’t attend that church anymore where that ministry was available…
Thank you for your sweet comment, Amy…I think I will be blessed more than ever by our Good Friday service this year! I was so full of joy that “incourage” wanted to use this post for the week leading up to Good Friday and Easter…it was a kiss from God!