My days and weeks the past few months have been spent book writing. I’ve got a deadline looming on the insanely close horizon, and like any good writer, I’ve spent far too much time procrastinating. I suddenly need to scrub the bathroom sink, menu plan for an entire month, look into that itchy spot on my back, change my desktop wallpaper.
Anything but, you know, write.
In fact, right after I submit this post for publication, I’m getting right back at writing the ol’ book, ever looming she may be. It’s kinda ridiculous, actually, how timid I am to approach my own dadgum book.
I love writing, I feel called to write, and I’m honored to write. And yet, I put it off.
Here’s why I think that is.
Because big things — like book-writing, or sending our kids to a new school, or saying no to an opportunity that will most likely disappoint someone — ask us to risk.
Risk: To take action with big faith.
Putting myself out there with words on a blinking screen, for whatever reason, reminds me how really small I am compared to a God that’s so big, He’s actually called the author of life. He’s the one who actually wrote the life I’m leading that’s brought me to a season when I write. And He’s the author who’s written every single life that walks past through the ins and outs of every day.
I’m not good at vulnerability, and so I put off those things that ask of me big risk, because it requires of me a faith that is bigger than me. It’s as though Jesus really knew how hard this is for us mortals when He asked His disciples in the boat: “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?”
Do I still have no faith? After the years and years and years of Him showing up, gracefully and abundantly and more than I could ever ask or imagine, again and again?
It’s a bit ridiculous, really, coming from a daughter so terribly in awe of all Her father has given her. But there it is.
And you know what’s beautiful about it all? He takes my measly offering. He accepts my minuscule, mustard seed-sized faith and does His wonders with it anyway. He lays before me a wide, green pasture where I can walk freely in His goodness, because that’s just it — He’s good.
He’s good. Again and again and again, despite my lack of faith. And He’ll do it again, I know it.
If you’ve got something in front of you that’s asking you for big faith, and what you’ve got to offer feels ridiculously out of proportion, you’re in good hands. Because God loves to work wonders with whatever we bring.
Because He loves us first, and because He gives good gifts, all we need to bring is a willingness to receive. If we need more faith to have that hard conversation, He’ll give just what’s needed. If starting that new job feels like a massive step out of our element, all we really need to do is show up.
And if we have a big deadline on the horizon, the most we need to do is be willing to do the work set before us, one letter at a time.
No reason to procrastinate. Taking action, even with tiny faith, is giving God an opportunity to show up.