This summer, I had the unique experience of having my life told back to me in a most creative way. Karin introduced herself to me as “Karin with an i.” Karin, in addition to the many hats she wears as a wife and mom, is a professional organizer and coach. She is one of those modern-day goddesses who specializes in helping folks declutter, organize, and be more mindful with their stuff (I would love to be her assistant!).
After participating in the “Understanding Race/ism” class that I offer for parents, Karin expressed gratitude for my work and offered to come alongside me, hold my hand, and lead me in the ways of assembling my organization. I definitely needed her help. With no regard to whether I was ready or not, my organization had taken flight, speeding along and requiring me to pull it together while flying it!
Admittedly in our first few sessions, I was thoroughly confused by Karin’s methods. She unfurled a huge paper roll across a massive conference table, strategically selected specific colored markers as aids, and began asking me what seemed like a million questions about my life. Each answered question seemed to branch off into higher levels of inquiry. As I answered the questions, Karin eloquently painted the paper canvas with my words. She assigned each color its own emphasis and expression. She sculpted columns like book chapters. She drew images where words were not enough. She highlighted and color-coded themes.
Karin then proceeded to read my life back to me, revealing patterns, open doors, transitions, and themes I had never noticed. With the same intensity that Karin had creatively transcribed, colored, and drawn my life on paper, she turned to me and said, “My goodness, Lucretia. You were designed for this work. You were created for this job.”
I was shaken. For the first time, I could clearly hear it, see it, and feel it. I could taste the urgency. The pieces, chapters, twists, turns, traumatic encounters, accomplishments, disasters, hurts, and recoveries all culminated into significance!
In that moment, Mordecai’s words to Esther punched me in the gut, ” . . . Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14 NLT) I had heard and read the story and that passage in particular countless times. But this time, it had teeth! My life captured, inked, and scrolled out in color turned up the volume on these words: made for this. They were more weighty, more hardy. They were personal.
When she was done reading my life back to me, I said to Karin, “It all sounds so good when you read it.” To which she chuckled and replied, “I’m only telling you what you told me!”
Karin had skillfully decluttered my perception of a chaotic and haphazard existence and revealed to me the divinely ordered and choreographed steps of my significance. I was made for this! Her intention, she explained, was to help me see my significance so that I can blossom from roots of conviction and not get derailed, distracted, or discouraged.
As we live in the seconds, hours, and days of our lives, we can easily forget that with each millisecond, we are being made. With each occurrence, event, and transition in our past and present, we are being shaped for the “this” we were made for. On this side of Esther’s story, we know that her role or status as queen did not make her significant. Many served as queen before and after her. Instead, the throne required an Esther whose life was shaped to serve in the manner that she served. Her role as queen called upon her to do what she was made for, what her past had gotten her ready for.
Like Esther, you were made to contribute your significance to the world. The world needs you to live out your significance and not get distracted, discouraged, or derailed. It is essential that you root and rest your journey in servanthood and not serve your ego. Know that you don’t need to look for value because you are already valued. Understand that you don’t need to clamor for attention because you are already enough. Recognize that you don’t need to sacrifice for love, for you were created by God’s love and you are loved. You are significant!