About the Author

Holley Gerth is a Wall Street Journal bestselling author, counselor, and life coach. Her newest release is The Powerful Purpose of Introverts: Why the World Needs You to Be You. She's also wife to Mark, Mom to Lovelle, and Nana to Eula and Clem.

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  1. Thank you for the reminder that real life doesn’t live inside a screen. Many blessings to you and yours Holley

  2. Holley,
    I’m fortunate to have a few close “someone’s”. I met with one of them recently in a coffee shop. I’m not kidding when I say that we were the only one’s in the place, sitting without laptops propped up in front of us with cellphones nearby. Everyone else was staring at a screen of some sort, and there we were talking, laughing, praying together. We were sharing joys, trials, life events, girl talk. We sat there for 2 hours just talking and I walked away feeling refreshed….invigorated. No, you can’t “do” life on social media. It has its place – like here where we can share and relate to people that miles and distance would have prevented us from doing so years ago, but # of likes can’t hold a candle to hugs and hands held. I see young kids going to “coding camp” during school breaks. I want to say, “Go out, enjoy the sunshine, play, interact, laugh, get into feuds, do life with others.” The screen will always be there, but people may not. Spot on post, Holley!
    Blessings,
    Bev xx

  3. Holley,

    Social media is fine for posting pics, staying in touch with friends & family. It doesn’t hold a candle to “being present.” God wants us in community. He knows how desperately we need each other. Our lives should never be so busy that we can’t call, text, or email a friend. Tell them how much they mean to you. It is super important. You never know how long you have. This past summer my neighbor lost her youngest & only living son. On several occasions I have spent time with her. Took food right after he died, got food together when granddaughter was to be out of town for a week, made a nice fruit basket from church. Just being there & giving her hugs made her day. it is the same for all of us. We want real life interactions with each other. We need to tell each other how much they mean to us. Nothing takes the place of a big hug & nice smile.

    Blessings 🙂

  4. Dear Holley,
    I feel so blessed with this reminder from you this morning. And I did need to hear it!
    Thanks for being so transparent about your life.
    May God Bless You and your Ministry!
    Love & Hugs.

  5. Thanks for being here and commenting, friends! This kind of connection is what I do love so much about social media–that we can connect from wherever we are. I’d rather have coffee in person with each of you but I’m grateful for a way to connect right here today.

  6. I know many ask for prayers to a church, I ask prayers from deliverance from church. I am a pastor’s wife physically sick from mistreatment. I’m dying inside. My heart aches for love.

    • My heart aches for yours “C”. I’m the granddaughter of a well known pastor. He couldn’t have cared less about the “being known” part. But, it did give my grandmother time to mentor other taxed pastor’s wives. Grandmother was one gutsy pioneer woman. Her words were firm, “I do not please the church. I please the Lord. In doing so, I will please the people, who are where they need to be with Jesus. When I do not please the Lord, He will convict me or send someone to open my heart to what I need to fix.” This isn’t a quote, per say, rather a shared wisdom I was told often through our times together as I grew into a young woman. She knew the pressure the devil puts on a God Centered family to discourage and destroy. In the world of worship I grew up in a pastor’s duties were almost an absurd responsibility to be the perfect model of Betty Crocker, Entertainer, Social Committee Director, and five star Hotelier. Grandma had it down. She was very good at it. Yet, I saw her weariness in it at times. That’s when she would walk away. She would go to her quiet place and have time alone. I don’t begin to need to know what you are going through, but I’m glad I saw your plea this morning. We may never meet and yet I will be praying over you. Be strong and courageous.

    • Dear C, how my heart goes out to you! My mom was a pastor’s wife, so being a PK, I know the dynamics of that life and how difficult it can be. I just felt led to try to encourage you by praying for you:
      Father, you see your daughter, C, and you know her name and her pain. Wrap her up in your arms of love today and bring healing balm to her wounded heart and comfort to her suffering soul. Please give her something tangible today to let her know like never before how very much you love her. Cup her face in your hands and lift her head so that she can gaze into your eyes of love and be filled with your peace. Continue to bring her to my mind, so with each thought I can pray for this beloved daughter of yours. Thank you, our dear and faithful Lord, for how you are going to show your amazing love to C today…amen.

    • Dear C,
      I know this may sound cliche’ but after ten years of teenage depression I was able to testify to God’s word: The light shines in the darkness and the darkness did not overcome it! John 1:5 and John 16:33 ‘ … Take heart (be of good gourage) I have overcome the world!’ We shall
      overcome in Jesus our Victorious King forever.
      It’s always darkest before dawn! Praying for you 🙂
      Ruth

  7. I’m thankful for those very exclusive, close friends that are as close to me as my own sister. If you could know how dear my sister is to me, then you know that’s tight. My sister is blessed to have her dear heart sisters, too. Neither of us feels threatened by this idea. We thank God together often that He has given us these precious friends we call our Heart Sisters. Collectively, I have a few little sisters and she has a few big sisters more than we started with. Isn’t the Lord generous when we open up to His vision of love?

  8. I so needed this,this little note brought something to my attention that I had not considered previously…Thank you so much for giving me awarenes.

    Fondly,

    Teresa Martin

  9. This is wonderful! It is so easy, especially as a beginning blogger, to get so bogged down with the social media numbers instead of investing in the friendships around me. Thank you for this reminder! It is so beautiful that you had a friend that cared enough about you to let you know that she missed you.

  10. I recently deleted FB from my phone as I felt myself drawn to it to waste my time and escape from my own life. I am so very thankful that I did. Yes I miss what my friends and family are up to, but I get to enjoy the present with my kids way more often. I get to be here for them and I feel God even speaking into me more about reaching out and making real connections with real people. Get out do stuff, not just like or love stuff but be a part of it.

  11. What a beautiful post, Holley! I always feel better after reading something you’ve written. I wish you could be my neighbor 🙂
    Take Good Care!

  12. We will soon see friends whom we’ve known for more than thirty-five years. It’s a sure thing we’ll reminisce and celebrate the precious memories we share–which wouldn’t exist if we hadn’t done life together, communicated heart-to-heart with each other, laughed and prayed with and for each other. With you, Holley, I am SO thankful they have stood by us and let us stand by them. Without a doubt, such friends are a priceless gift from God!

  13. This is a nice message. Touched my heart. Though honestly, no one really wants to be friends with spinsters – not even their own siblings because they have their own families and dislike any intrusion of any kind!

    So the best friend Who found me about 14 years back when I was lost and lonely and broken trying to look for a good friend and be a good friend – neither worked – has been the Lord Jesus. I’m learning as the days go by that He loves me unconditionally. Besides He filled all the emptiness that was in me for so very long. In fact I’ve gotten to realize in these years of growing up in Christ that many married people are lonely folk. So really I’m better off as I can at least chose to walk away or shut the doors on all negativity.