Here it is, mid-May, and I’m going back and forth between reading news on Meghan and Harry’s baby boy and remembering this time last year when two of my three kiddos graduated high school.
Planning a graduation is in many ways like planning a wedding. Out of town guests? Check. Cake and a party? Check. Lots of bittersweet tears because really, weren’t they just in kindergarten ten minutes ago? Check, check.
In addition to recalling all the planning for my sons’ graduation, I also remember spending a fair amount of time in the land between Done and Should Have Done. In other words, I wondered then (and still wonder now) what opportunities I let slip and teaching moments I missed. I know I’ve messed up more times than anyone can count, but I also know that it’s my mess that reminds me I rest not in my perfection but God’s perfectly kept promises.
Amen.
When it comes to my children, it helps also to rest in Lysa TerKeurst’s wise words: “Don’t take too much credit for the good or the bad.“
Once again, I say, amen.
I know this, but if I’m being honest, I know regret, too. So, I offer this prayer to God for myself and for all the mamas witnessing a milestone graduation this month. I offer it for each and every mama who wants to have both a proper perspective for past regret and hopeful encouragement for the future.
Dear Father in Heaven,
Shine Your light on every regret in the shadows, and show us how to give every crumb of it over to you, once and for all.
Turn every wish for a do-over into wonder for Your grace that fills our gaps.
Lord, only You know how many meals we’ve made, how much Chutes and Ladders we’ve played, and how many big decisions we’ve weighed. Give us peace in our todays about the choices of our yesterdays and Your wisdom in the choices of our tomorrows.
Lord, only You see all the miles we’ve driven, the attention we’ve given, and the arguments we’ve forgiven. Help us know we’re seen and loved by You and by our children.
Lord, only You can count all the hours we’ve spent sitting in stands, held hearts in our hands, and braced for doors slammed. Give us fresh eyes to see the good that came from the struggles.
Only You can fathom all the late nights we’ve fretted, the conversations we’ve dreaded, and the behavior we’ve hated (theirs and ours). If we’re holding onto words and actions that need letting go, give us the courage and ability to do so.
Thank you, Father, for every hug offered, every question pondered, and every struggle uncovered. We thank you for it all because we believe you use it all and that none of it is wasted.
Like emerald and ruby gems in a jewelry box, may we treasure the love we’ve shared, the laughter that repaired, and every brave act we dared. Help our children to look back with fondness and help us to look forward with hope because of those moments.
Refresh our memories with all the times we showed up for our kids in the past and guide us on how we can best show up for them in the future.
Please give our children Your keen discernment in this next phase of their life, and thank You that Your presence goes where ours cannot.
Open our children’s hearts to You more and more each day, and may they make others want to know You more.
Turn any grieving we feel over this season into grace over our children.
We thank you for the love of Jesus that is a covering for any mistakes and the foundation for any success.
We love you, Father, and we thank you for the precious gift of these children. Be with them as they string together their song’s notes hour by hour, day by day. May they care most about singing it for You.
As much as we love them, we thank You that You love them more. Give us eyes expectant to Your good in their future — and ours, too.
We love you.
In the mighty name of Jesus we pray,
Amen
Michele Morin says
Following your lead, Kristen, in channeling the fretting and all the regretting toward prayer. Thank you for all the “only You’s” in this offering, because it reminds me that only God knows our hearts and our motives–and that we are in as much of a learning process as our kids have been!
Kristen Strong says
Yes! Here’s to “growing up” and learning alongside our kiddos. Love what you shared here, Michele. xo
Debbie says
Thank you for the graduate prayer. You helped me realize so many of the milestones I’ve overlooked in the chaos of preparing for my daughter’s college graduation.
Kristen Strong says
You’re so welcome, Debbie. May you enjoy this special time with your girl!
Beth Williams says
Kristen,
Raising children in this day & age is hard. It is only with God’s patient love & grace that you can make it to any graduation. Children can be trouble one minute & joy the next. In my small church there were a lot of happy mamas yesterday. These young people were getting a lot of awards: top 10% of class, perfect attendance, best in math to name a few. You parents worked hard with those young kids to instill good values in them. Thank you for raising a generation that will make a positive impact in our world. They all love Jesus, church & learning. May they leave a legacy where ever they go!
Blessings 🙂
Kristen Strong says
Yes, may they leave a God-glorifying legacy! And I’ll forever be thankful for people like you, Beth, who encourage through kind mothering and faithful prayers. You are beloved!
Melanie chitwood says
Wow. Loove this! Thank you! I don’t have a graduate but my son just git married. Such a great devo fir the seasons if our children’s lives.
Kristen Strong says
Yes, I think it holds true for all kinds of changing seasons! Praying right now for you and this special time for your family. xo
Tammie Bray says
You spoke directly from this mama’s heart. All I can say is AMEN.
Kristen Strong says
Solidarity, sister! Sending love.
Bobbie says
So perfect!
Thank you, and Amen!
Kristen Strong says
Thank YOU, Bobbie. xoxo
Amy says
Kristen,
I needed this prayer so much today. Thank you.
Kristen Strong says
I needed it, too. Sending love and solidarity to you, Amy.
Denise B says
When my son graduated I was just glad he was done. He hated school and the fact he graduated was a miracle of answered prayer. He has matured and turned into such a wonderful young man its hard to remember that hard headed kid that I just wanted to graduate. But now my daughter who has been my straight A student, my community volunteer, a softball player and that kid all the teachers, administrators and under classmen love is graduating. I have been to NHS ceremonies, Golden Laurel Award Ceremonies, last softball games, Senior Night and heard how much she will be missed by the school. I have held it together at each event, smiling proudly pointing directly to her for all her achievements and a future that is so bright. I too have been wrapped up in getting the perfect party planned but the day is coming. June 1st she will walk across that stage my baby girl. The baby girl I prayed for, the baby girl who has been a blessing to my heart since the moment she screamed into the world. So THANK YOU for this prayer today, you have know idea how much my mind, heart and soul needed to see and read those words.
Maylee says
Prayers needed for this mama here. Graduation is this Wednesday and my son will not be graduating and I am most sadden. He had taken a detour and possibly will graduate in the summer, July. That is if he completes and pass all that is required of him to do so. He is our second son and middle child, an older brother and a younger sister and had always been our most brightest child being in the gifted program since 2nd grade up until now but not sure what happened. Both myself and his dad were not at all pleased when we learned of this outcome. But I know we must continue to show him love and grace as God had shown us on a daily basis. Somehow though I feel as if I had failed along the road somewhere and as a result of it, had failed my son in whatever that is that he was needing. I know my hubby tells me that this is on him and not a reflection of who we are and how we raised him. It’s hard to see your child in this situation and I trust You Lord. I know You have a great plan and purpose for him even while he is wandering. I have hope that he will have the courage to fulfill all that he needs to and although we will not be seeing him walk this Wednesday with his classmates, we have faith that we see him walk in July. Thank you Lord for loving on our family.
Nancy Ruegg says
My nest has been empty nearly twenty years; all three children are leading productive lives. And yet regrets still come to visit now and then. So even though I’m far removed from the graduation scene, I still found great encouragement from your post, Kristen. With you, I want to “turn every wish for a do-over into wonder for Your grace that fills our gaps.” Hallelujah for our God of grace who can and will do that!