About the Author

Aliza Latta is a Canadian writer, journalist, and artist, who is a huge fan of telling stories. She writes about faith and young adulthood on her blog alizalatta.com, and is the author of the novel Come Find Me, Sage Parker. Find her on Instagram as @alizalatta.

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  1. Aliza,
    Praying for you as you take this step. I’m so disappointed with life right now and with myself. I thought I’d step out of my Masters and into a god given role. I’m still sure I’ve understood his calling on my life but silence…
    I’ve applied for numerous roles and interviewed for two. Twice for one but missed out. Some I wasn’t even short listed. I don’t understand…

    It hurts. Maybe I’m not equipped to be the ‘hands and feet of Jesus? As the saying goes. I even applied to work for a Christian ngo and I still wasn’t what they were looking for… I wonder if I’ve fallen out with Gods favour? Not insinuating I’m near a good wholesome Christian at all I just wanted to work for his purpose.

    It’s not just that money is so tight and I need any job not just in the peacebuilding field. I need Him. What you’ve inspired me to do is open up to Jesus as my own counsellor. I do hope I read words or God speaks to me

    • Jas,

      Praying for you sweet sister. In His timing He will send the right job. Maybe He’s trying to teach you patience. it is learned in trials. You are equipped to be the hands & feet of Jesus. Talk to God about this. Ask Him why the long wait. He will answer you. He will speak to you in His own way. Still praying that God will guide your steps to the right job.

      Blessings 🙂

    • Jas; I just wanted to encourage you and let you know God has not forgotten you! He knows the plans He has for you and they are good! He has something even better in store for you than you can imagine! Don’t let the enemy tell you otherwise! He is causing all things to work together for your good! Keep your eyes on Him, He will not forsake you! I know because I have been there at times of anxiety and self defeat trying to figure it all out when all He asks us is to trust Him! He’s got this! Praying for you my sweet sister!

      • Thank you for your loving words Darlene. I know God has good plans for our lives, it’s just so hard sometimes with the disappointment. God is good!

    • Dear Jas, waiting is so hard. I’m wondering if there are some little pieces of your training that are missing. Maybe you should try to ferret out exactly what it is that these employers are looking for that you don’t seem to have. Or maybe it’s something you have but you don’t display it well. Perhaps some sort of internship would help you on your way. Maybe you could make a lunch date with an employer, after the fact, and ask for advice moving forward. Maybe all you need is the right mentor. In the meanwhile, I’m going to start praying about you and your situation. May you be blessed greatly during your journey!

    • Hi Jas – I am so sorry for the pain you are going through! I encourage you to get into the presence of Jesus. I think he is so much kinder than any of us can ever imagine. Praying for you today, Jas. Thank you for sharing your heart here. <3

  2. Aliza,
    It takes great courage to do what you are doing. I am praying for you…that Jesus’ healing hand would touch those opened wounds and would give you the gift of peace, healing, and wholeness. Again, this year, the holidays will be hard. I am ashamed that I allowed myself to be verbally and emotionally abused by my ex husband for over 25 years. I kept telling myself…it’s not that bad. It became my normal. Now my grown children are carrying on where he left off. When people ask me what I’m doing for the holidays, I want to cringe because it’s hard to admit to people, face to face, that my children want nothing to do with me. I feel like a failure as a mother. I know my self worth doesn’t hinge on their behavior, but it’s just hard. It would just be nice to be done with dysfunctional relationships. I am focusing on the wonderful relationships I DO have, but that pain is always there. Thanks for the invitation to share my pain.
    Blessings,
    Bev xx

    • Bev –
      My heart breaks for you, my friend. It’s my greatest fear that my young daughter will continue her father’s legacy of abuse.

      I continue to pray for your reconciliation.
      Elizabeth

      • Elizabeth,

        You’ve done the best thing by getting you and your daughter out of that toxic environment. The fact that she’ll be removed from that influence is a good thing. I always pray for you and your daughter…

        Blessings,
        Bev xx

    • Bev, I am so sorry for the pain you lived through and still carry.

      We’re so glad you’re here. You have so many wonderful gifts of nurturing care and encouragement. You mother us with your gracious prayers and words.

    • My friend, Bev – I am praying against any shame you feel. I keep thinking about how Jesus offers life to the full, and shame can’t possibly be part of that full life. I struggle with shame too. I don’t want to live in that shame anymore. Thank you for your honesty and sharing your pain. We love you!

    • Bev,

      Praying for you as always. Don’t let the lies of the evil one deceive you. You are NOT a bad mother. Lots of people raise “good” Christian children only to have them become prodigals. We must keep praying hard for them. God can & will change their hearts one day. Don’t fret over what to tell others about you holiday plans. Just say you are spending time with family. No one needs to know children won’t be there. Focus on Jesus & what He’s already given you. A wonderful hubby who cherishes you for the great woman of God that you are. I’ll keep praying for you sweet sweet sister!

      Blessings 🙂

    • Bev
      Will pray again for the reunification of you with your children. It’s hard, I cannot imagine being apart from my children and having them be older. As people have said below you are a Mother to us and you bring a lot of comfort and joy to us. Be grateful God brought you out from under the abuse. You are free. Keep being you. Stone if you need to with your kids and if you don’t then remain or let them know the door is always open to them BUT do not let them treat you unfairly. All I can do is pray we don’t fully know your situation but ask God to watch over you and protect you!!

      • Jas,
        Thanks so much for your prayers!! Praying for you as well. Sometimes we just don’t understand the bigger picture behind our struggles, but we need to cling to the fact that God is good and He is faithful.
        Blessings,
        Bev xx

  3. I am over 60 and finally got up the nerve to call a counselor after reading a devotional here not long ago and suddenly bursting into tears.. My appointment isn’t until December. I cry when I even think about it. I have told myself for years that I am coping just fine. Everyone has struggles. I have Jesus. Why would I need counseling? Then I look at a close family member who REALLY needs counseling. I don’t know how to help her. So I decided to make an appointment myself. And then I started crying on the phone. I had thought the only reason I had made this decision was to make it easier to convince my sister to go for herself. But maybe I really need this for myself. I keep getting affirmation in various places, like now! I’m still praying for my sisters. One has agreed to go for herself, but we both know that if we go,maybe someday we’ll be able to convince our other sister to join us.. Please pray for us.

    • Thank you for sharing your story. It gives me courage and will allow me and many others to take that first step toward wholeness and healing. God bless you and your sisters.

    • Prayers for you and your sisters. (I have always wished I had a sister.☺) One of the best things I have ever done for myself, was go to counseling with a Godly Christian counselor. Along with Jesus, she has been such a blessing. It will be hard, there will be days when you want to quit. Keep at it, it’s so worth it. Blessings to you.

    • Debbie! I am so proud of you. Counselling is so scary – and you are so brave for taking this step! Praying for you as you continue to step towards healing. <3

    • My biggest regret with counseling was not going sooner! When I began I thought I’d go maybe 3 or 4 times. Don’t kid yourself like I did. Lean in and let the hard work do its purpose. Don’t quit in the messy middle but keep going. Eventually you will recognize that while circumstances may not be different, you can be different in those circumstances, and others, like your sister, will take notice as well. You’ll find yourself saying, ‘here’s what I’ve been learning…’
      Remember it takes a few sessions for your counselor to get to know you. Be patient with God’s process and ever patient and gentle with yourself as your Heavenly Father is with you. Way to be brave and make that first phone call!

  4. I so broken inside. I read my Bible, I pray and nothing. I don’t understand why I must continue to go through heartache. I’ve been used by every man that as came into my life. I thought I would be safe with talking to someone online and I was hurt by that. I’ve struggle in my relationships. I want to be in a loving relationship and I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Why have failed so Terrible in so many areas of my life. Everything has been struggle for me. Nothing has been easy.

    • Mildred, I am so sorry for the pain you’re going through. I am sorry to hear how people have used you — that is so wrong, and not at all God’s best for you. I encourage you to come before Jesus and tell him all of this — he is so kind and tender and loving. You are his beloved, Mildred. Thank you for your honesty! <3

  5. This was my story many years ago and when I prayed for help God provided a counselor for me. It took 5 painful years of tears and work with therapists to free me. Along the way God always provided exactly what I needed to get through it all. I still have memories that hurt but many days I love myself and all days I am filled wit gratitude and live for our Saviour. I sincerely pray for healing for everyone and that those hurting will cry out to Jesus and accept his perfect help.

  6. Bev,

    Quit being so hard on yourself. Getting to the point of divorce is never easy. God saw fit to help you leave that person & gave you a wonderful new hubby who seems to cherish you for the woman you are. You are NOT a failure as a mom. Many people raise “good” Christian children only to have them turn prodigal. They hit the world & decide they like it better. Praying God will change your children’s hearts toward Him & you. If people ask about the holidays just tell them what you’re doing. Say celebrating the birth of Christ with my hubby. Don’t worry about what they think. Praying for you this season & always. God will eventually mend the hearts & minds of all concerned. Find a trusted friend & share openly about your pain. Getting it out helps. Praying sweet sweet sister.

    (((((Hugs)))))

  7. Aliza,

    Thank you for sharing your story with us. Stuffing & numbing the pain only helps for a short time. Eventually the emotions will rise & get to you. We all need to name our pains & tell someone. By telling our story we are helping others. We say to them “you’re not alone.” Plus it frees us from our past & starts the long healing process. It takes time & courage to get there. The coming holidays don’t make it any easier. Everyone seems so happy with their Normal Rockwell pictured dinners. We aren’t all that lucky. God says a cord of two strands is not easily broken. Friends & counselors can help you through your tough times. I was blessed to have a good friend walk beside me when my parents dementia/mental illness got bad. She was there & understanding. It helped me to get stuff off my chest & speak it out loud. She even prayed for me. The devil wants us to wallow in our pasts. God made us for community. He expects us to talk with each other & be there. Thankful you have a counselor to talk with. It helps to sort things out & will make you feel some better. Praying for you during this healing time.

    Blessings 🙂

  8. Everyone that has pain from problems heals in there own time. Don’t let anyone tell you when to go. When to go finish getting the help you need. You be so proud of yourself Aliza. That you have got a councilor you trust. To help you. You have started getting the help the you need. You will with Gods help when ready go back to your councilor and get the rest of the help you need. Remember that when you do Jesus is with you holding your hand. You can do it. Get free. Satan the Old Devil would want you to stay tied up in this you are going through and not finish the help you need to be a free woman. God intended you to be. Free all you are going through and be a brand new prerson in him. With a new heart. New spirit with God spirit shinning in you. For all the world too see. Then you telling of how God helped you get the strength to get the freedom he so wants you to have and live in him. Not what Satan the Old Devil would want. You holding on to this. Never being free. I had my problems in the past. Only for prayer and talking to the right people and getting help and Jesus being with me. I would not be the person I am today. I stand on Gods word the Bible the promises in it and prayer. Yes you never forget what happened why you needed to the get help. But after you have got the help it does not get to you anymore. At the start it scary and it takes times to trust someone to tell them how you feel. Yes there are days you put it off going. But you do with God help get the strength to go and you are glad you went. Like me now years later. You will look back and see Gods hand in it all. Be glad you went got the help. No matter how long it took. As it say in the Bible the Truth will set you free. You will be a new woman. With Satan the Old Devil well and truly stamped under your feet. I will keep you in my prayers. Love Dawn Ferguson-Little

  9. Aliza –
    I applaud your bravery. In my experience, healing (through counseling) begins when we are forced to do the hard work. I pray for your healing.
    Elizabeth

  10. Loving the Angelou quote, and it lines up perfectly with words I’m carrying around in my planner these days:
    “There is some pain that we just have to sit with.”
    Not sure where it came from, but it’s a helpful reminder to this girl who wants instant resolution on everything.

  11. Aliza,
    This post is such a beautiful testimony to God’s continued work in you and a courageous calling up to all of us to give voice to our pain that we might be free from it. I love the way you highlighted Jesus’ kindness in asking the blind man to name his pain. I am so proud of you and encouraged by you.
    xx
    Becky

  12. Aliza, your honesty, humility, and courage are an inspiration to us all! I see a great ripple effect from your willingness to share; some already in evidence among the comments here. I also pray your next session will bring healing and light to your spirit!

  13. I haven’t read all the comments but I’d like to tell you my experience. I’m 57 an I started seeing counselors when I was 25, paying for it myself when I was a dishwasher. I’ve probably spent about $100K, maybe $200K in counseling and… though a few have been helpful when I’ve been overwhelmed, like when my husband died, for the most part now I just believe in the Law of Attraction. And I would counsel that it is better to watch the romantic movies and eat Doritos, but actually believing that whatever you want in your life you can bring into your life by imagining it and believing that it will come to you.

    Counselors want you to dive deep because they make more money that way. If you take your car to a muffler shop, they will find something wrong with your muffler. Go to a counselor, they will agree with that you “need “ counseling.

    Try this for a month: watch your favorite romantic movies or movies that picture a life pretty much how you would like yours to be. But instead of thinking after it’s over “Oh, I’m just an escapist, real life isn’t like that. I must deal with all the harsh realities of my real life”, think something more like “Yeah! That was great! I love happy endings! I want a love, a life, just like that!” And just keep thinking “That is what I want. “ And don’t go to counseling, and don’t “confront your fears”, and don’t try to figure other people out. Don’t think about the past, and what you did wrong, what he did wrong, what she or they did wrong. Just watch all the happy movies with all the moving pictures of life the way you want it. And eat Doritos and ice cream. Do your yoga and go to the gym and the beach and the movies. Get yer hair and nails did. Buy new clothes. Be happy just because your here. And watch your new beautiful life unfold before you.