We all know that we’re supposed to be kind to others, and we genuinely want to. But it’s easy to get off track when we’re stuck in traffic, feel like we were wronged, face loud, contradicting viewpoints, or are even criticized for our own beliefs. How does the Bible tell us to respond to our adversaries? How did Jesus treat those who criticized Him? In I Peter 2:23, it says that “while [Jesus was] being reviled, He did not revile in return; while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously.” Jesus did not argue with His critics. He did not keep a grudge or become angry with them. Instead, Jesus carried on teaching from village to village because His focus was on pleasing God, not those who had wronged Him.
So, while none of us are perfect, we are called to become more and more like the Perfect One. That means we respond with respect, we respond with love, we respond with peace, and we respond with the hope of unity in mind. If we, as Christians, started responding with this type of kindness in every situation, to every person, everywhere we go, we would stand out.
People wouldn’t be able to ignore the difference we’d be making in our families, our communities, and ultimately in our world. And when we do that, we become the salt and the light (Matthew 5:13-16). If we can turn kindness into something that’s not just an act, but a way of life that automatically flows through us as we journey on this earth, we will be pleasing the One who showed us the ultimate act of kindness when He gave His life to redeem us.
When I was a water safety instructor many years ago, I had to do mouth-to-mouth resuscitation on a drowning victim. This involved putting my mouth to their mouth and breathing into their lungs to help them find life again.
As Christians, it is important to check in regularly with ourselves regarding how we use our mouths. Are we, as God says to, speaking grace to those who hear us? Are we speaking truth at all times? Are we demonstrating to nonbelievers that we truly care about them? Do they know, when we’re sitting beside them, that we’re there to help and not hurt? And when they hear us, do they recognize our words as life-giving?
Kindness is demonstrated through good words. With every breath, we have the opportunity to say words that tear down, or words that build up.
Nobody is perfect. But with how we talk to others, we can show them that the goodness of God is worth discovering and enjoying. We can allow them to have a taste of God’s kindness by how kind we are to them.
“Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.”
“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, and forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.”
Lord, make my words pleasing to all who hear them. Fill my heart with kindness so that I speak kindness wherever I go.
Dr. Tony Evans is the founder and senior pastor of Oak Cliff Bible Fellowship in Dallas, founder and president of The Urban Alternative, and author of over 150 books, booklets, and Bible studies. The first African American to earn a doctorate of theology from Dallas Theological Seminary, he has been named one of the Twelve Most Effective Preachers in the English-Speaking World by Baylor University. Dr. Evans’s radio broadcast is heard on over 1,400 radio outlets daily, and his sermons are streamed and downloaded over twenty million times annually.
His new collection with DaySpring begins with 100 Days of Cultivating Kindness, a 100-day guide to becoming contagiously kind in order to change the world.
How do you change minds and attitudes?
How do you alter the perspectives and paradigms of others?
How do you make the world a better place?
It isn’t through violence, retaliation, or insisting on our own way. In fact, one of the strongest forces for changing lives is simple, free, and fulfilling: kindness.
In 100 Days of Cultivating Kindness, Dr. Tony Evans lays out a compelling case for being contagiously kind. Not only do we have the help of the Holy Spirit and the example of our Savior, but we have every reason to engage others with kindness based on the results that it provides. The truth is, kindness that catches on could turn our world upside down. Come discover the power and passion to be relentlessly kind — and see what happens next!
Order your copy of Cultivating Kindness today . . . and leave a comment below for a chance to WIN one of 5 copies*!
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Hi. I mean no disrespect to Dr. Evans and his book, but this is a space for women. I know that this site is overseen by publishers who wish to sell the books they’re publishing, but I personally would like to see this space remain for women only. Just wanted to share that opinion. I hope I did not offend in any way. Thanks!
Janet Poole says
This is exactly what the world needs to read. I will be ordering for myself and would love to win copies to share, Let’s be Jesus in the skin!!
Andrea C says
Thank you, Dr. Evans for these beautiful reminders. The old hymn refrain “and they’ll know we are Christians by our love” pops into head often, especially when I feel I’m falling short. Knowing Jesus walked in our shoes and stayed focused on his Father is encouraging to us all. Kindness is definitely deeper than just acts.
Thank you for giving us the opportunity to win this book! I need to be reminded each day to be kind. My heart and brain want to be kind to everyone, but sometimes my mouth runs ahead and my words are not what they should be.
Thank you for this opportunity.
Thank you Dr. Evans for the powerful reminder to be kind to one another. With all that’s going on in the world today, I will look for opportunities to be kind to others. It’s really not a hard thing to do.
Diana Willis says
Love this message!!
This was an excellent reminder of how we can catch more flies with honey. Returning harshness with harshness has never worked in the situations I’ve been in and it is good to remember to just be kind.
Love love love this… we all need to share kindness. So MUCH unwholesome talk and words exchanged. May we humble ourselves and our hearts to speak/share Jesus’ love to others. This sounds like a book everyone should read, mark, learn, digest and model. Thank you Dr. Tony Evans
Dawn Ferguson-Little says
It hard to cultivate kindness when people you are related to and do home help for. Don’t see your point of view when you are trying to help them and tell them something to make like easier for them. Especially when they are not Saved. They think because they are older they know better. You know what you are saying to them is right and good advice for them. Especially if like Parent who is elderly. You try your best to stay calm. They can do things for themselves. They can don’t need to things that they do that make your work load harder for you. When you do what you do for them to help them and want to do it for them because your doing on to Lord and because you Love them. You ask them why if was something they could have easily hung up. They just dropped it and it had to be washed again. Giving you more work when you didn’t need it. When you have enough to do with all you do for them with doing their home. You try to cultivate kindness. It can be hard. You say nicely to them why didn’t you just hang it up. Not drop it on the wet floor. Now you given me more work. I have to now wash it. That has happened with me. They just laugh at me. I can see myself getting a bit cross with them. I know I should cultivate kindness. They always have answer for me. They say I picked it up from where you left it you because you forgot to put it way. I end up saying sorry I forgot to put it away. But no need for you when putting it away for me to just drop it when clean and especially when you knew it was dry to drop it on the wet floor. When you could have hung it up as it was clean and dry. Now it wet and dirty. You given me more work. Then they just laugh at you say at least I brought to the room it meant to go to. This were you get kind of mad and bit cross with them. You say to them but there was no need to drop it. Why didn’t you just hang it up. They say just wash it. How in situations like this do you feel like cultivating kindness with them. When you are saved and they do things like this to you. They done other things like this in the past to me. I can find it at time like this to cultivate kindness with them when like that. You do your best for them helping them by doing their home and doing all you do for them because you love them. Even though they are not saved. You pray for them and their Salvation. You try to be kind. Then you get you get a bit cross with them. You say why didn’t you just hang it up when it was clean not bring it to the room and drop it on the wet floor. To save giving me extra work I don’t need. Then you here God say to you time and time again keep praying for their salvation as they will not change until they get saved. They are elderly and lot older than you think they know better than you. They think you shouldn’t say anything to them even if they do wrong like this. When they couldn’t have avoided it avoided giving you extra work. They will never see your point of view and they will always have an answer for you and akways think they are alway right. So if you can don’t let it annoy you are get to you. Just say the thing to them once that they have done wrong. That they could have done right to avoid you the extra work. Tell them nice with kindness. You are not pleased they given you the extra work when they could have avoided it. Then let it go and say no more as nothing with them will change until they get saved. But at least you said that we bit to let them know in kindness it has annoyed you them doing it and giving you the extra work. You cultive kindness to them in the Lord. I have to do that and learn to do that as God has told me to do that. Even though it not easy. It will take time. I get there with God’s help. Love Dawn Ferguson-Little xx Love today reading
Yes, Dawn, I am confident you will get there with God’s help! I will pray for God to give you the grace and strength you need to cultivate kindness in your daily life, regardless of how challenging it can be at times.
This is a convicting subject! We have so many opportunities each day to choose our words well and yet don’t always remember to do so. It’s something I continually am reminded of as I try to encourage my children to do the same!
Kim Weldon says
Thank you for the timely reminder. I always show kindness by giving a smile when my eyes are locked on another person. We never know how a simple thing such as a smile can brighten a person’s day.
I would love to have a copy of your book.
Sherry Chatham says
Please enter me in the drawing for a copy of Dr. Tony Evans book on kindness. I want to share Christ & His Gospel msg of forgiveness, love, grace, & mercy & spread Christ’s kindness to others in all I say & do to Glorify God! Thank you! All God’s Blessings! Sherry
Claudia Batke says
I love this message from Dr. Evans. He is so genuine and loving. Kindness is so needed in our culture today. And we have plenty of opportunities to give it away daily. I would love to be a recipient of his book.
Vickie Holmes says
Thank you. This is a reminder of what god expects from us.
I would like to be relentlessly kind
This sounds like a process I need to experience! I do not always speak kindly. I can be sarcastic, complaining, critical of others. This book is going on my “to read ” listl
Heather Edwards says
Good and timely message for today’s world. I appreciate the giveaway and would like to be entered in. Thank you.
Jen Vortriede says
Kindness is so underrated these days, but it is exactly what this world needs. My beloved late mother was the kindest person I ever knew, and I want to be like her! I’ve very much enjoyed the excerpts from this book, and I would love to go through the entire one. Thank you for sharing your insights, Dr. Evans!
Carol Reed says
I’m on the road to heaven and everything I can learn is only making my journey
I can’t wait to read this and live it out!
Kathy Cleaver says
A simple hug. A chance to pay it forward when a persons card doesn’t work. A simple moment to listen. All acts of kindness
Amy Sellers says
I would love to win this book to use as a small group foundation.
Teresa Gaither says
this is so needed in our world today
I try very hard to let my light shine & show kindness to whomever I encounter each day. Some days are definitely easier than others. Having a book like this with daily encouragement to be kind would be very beneficial. And doing something for 100 days should help it become more of a daily habit, Lord willing! Let’s try to make a difference in the world, by showing kindness within our own sphere of influence, and then watch the ripple effect take place. I look forward to reading this book.
Christina Ryan Claypool says
Please help me be kind to others no matter what is happening in my life. Help me remember that the people I come in contact with each day are frequently fighting unseen battles of their own. Give me the grace to share your hope and love with this hurting world.
P.S. Dr. Evans is one of my spiritual fathers. I often listen to his online sermons when I need guidance. Thank you for this post today.
Michelle MC says
My mom used to say, “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” We really do need to be careful with our words and spread kindness.
This book sounds excellent! I would love to win a copy.
Good thoughts to carry into my day…
Karen Marie says
We all need words throughout our day that build us up! Words are so strong and can be loving and can also hurt and never be forgotten! Kindness can carry us throughout our day with one simple word or beautiful phrase from a kind person .. it will make our souls fill with joy!
Teresa Cooper says
When I saw the title of this book I knew right away God put it in front of me. I recently had an experience I’m still regretting days later where I should have just went off on my own and prayed. Instead, I tried to muscle through my anger and frustration (mostly because I was very tired) on my own power and ended up negatively affecting those around me with my attitude. I shared thoughts that although weren’t mean, I’m not sure if they weren’t shared just to justify my attitude. Afterwards, I went off on my own and prayed for God to wash over me with the blood of Jesus, to wash away all the negative emotions and thoughts I’d been struggling with. And He did. Things were better after but I’m still struggling with what will happen next time. I look forward to reading this book and what God, through the Holy Spirit, will do to make my words and actions more encouraging and make me a better witness to those around me, even when I’m tired.
Beth Williams says
This world is in desperate need of kindness. There is so much strife & hatred going on in our world today. God has made me an encourager. At work I thank our EVS (cleaning) people for the good job they are doing including the managers. Mostly they hear negative remarks. I want to let them know that I see the hard work they put in. Kindness goes beyond just our words. It can include our actions. Giving someone a call to check on them or offering to help someone with a chore. Going to try to tame my tongue & be more kind to everyone!