I told the world (okay, social media) that I don’t sort my clothes before I wash them. And the world had big feelings about that.

It was wild to see how upset people got about me — someone they only know through their phones — not separating my jeans from my t-shirts.

There were dire warnings about every article of clothing.

“Your jeans are going to bleed on your white t-shirts.” (Actually, it’s been fine. I throw in a color catcher if I think something might bleed.)

“Ew … you wash your underwear with your kitchen towels? This is why you can’t eat at everyone’s house.” (I said I don’t separate my clothes. I do wash all the towels that need it once a week. And for the record, no one has ever gotten sick from eating at my house.)

“You are wrong.” (Um . . . Okay . . . )

Big feelings.

Why? Because many of us have been trained to believe there is only one right way to do everything, and everyone else needs to do it that way, too.

There’s a cultural pressure — especially on women — to do it all, do it perfectly, and do it without complaint. But here’s the truth: doing everything at 100 percent, 100 percent of the time, leads to exhaustion, frustration, and burnout.

And the solution we’re often given?
Wait for life to “calm down.”
Get more organized so you can return to doing it all.
Try harder.

And to really twist the knife, we sometimes spiritualize it. We’ve confused busyness with faithfulness. And it’s slowly crushing us.

Let me offer another way: The Minimum Standard of Care.

If you’re thriving with your current systems — wonderful. But if you’re underwater, constantly running behind, and feeling like you’re failing at everything, it’s time to renegotiate. Here are some questions to ask yourself:

Can you do less?
Can you do it “less well”?

Can you lower your standards? Not your values or your faithfulness, but the expectations that were handed to you by your mom, your grandma, your friend’s mom, your neighbor, or even your own inner critic.

This isn’t about laziness or neglect.
It’s about stewardship and sustainability.

Consider these suggestions for practical ways to manage what’s on your plate and protect your peace.

Do Less

• Make sure everyone capable is helping at home. You don’t have to be the default doer.
• Resign from draining volunteer roles.
• Buy dinner or get takeout without guilt.
• Use grocery delivery or pickup.
• Skip Christmas cards this year (or forever).
• Let go of thank-you notes for casual events.
• Buy birthday cakes instead of baking them.
• Let someone else host the next gathering.

Do It “Less Well”

• Make sandwiches or cereal some nights for dinner.
• Use paper plates when the dishes feel overwhelming.
• Fold laundry imperfectly — or not at all.
• Clean only what guests will see. You’re not a hotel.
• Load the dishwasher “wrong” and move on.
• Leave the beds unmade and close the door.

Let’s visit Ecclesiastes 4:6 (NIV) for some timeless wisdom:

“Better one handful with tranquility than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.”

Is there any better description of trying to keep a house running while people are living in it than “chasing after the wind”?

Doing less — and doing it less well — isn’t failure. Sometimes, it’s the wisest, most loving, and most faithful choice you can make.

It’s time to lower the bar. Not your integrity, not your purpose, but your unsustainable standards.

Jesus never once told us to have an organized spice drawer or themed lunchboxes. But He did say, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28 NIV).

Sometimes rest starts with releasing the unnecessary.
With letting go of perfection.
With refusing to chase after the wind.

If you’re looking for a community of women who are choosing peace over perfection and learning to let go of “chasing the wind,” come join us in Kathi Lipp’s Clutter Free Academy on Facebook — we’d love to welcome you.

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