Today is different from any other day I’ve ever experienced.
In just hours, my family will lay my dad’s remains to rest after a quiet church service. Eighteen months ago, I moved my parents from their small farming community to live near me in Kansas City. My mom needed help caring for my dad. Dementia stole his memory, while Parkinson’s disease stole his mobility.
He was confined to a wheelchair and his rugged Levi jeans were replaced with diapers. But, unlike many end-stage Parkinson’s patients, Dad was still able to swallow . . . which meant he was able to eat. We were so grateful for this answer to prayer.
His ability to eat was no small thing. Dad thought everything was better with bacon, which he loved about as much as he loved my mom’s chocolate chip cookies. In fact, the last thing he ate the day before he left this earth was an entire sheet of cookies straight from the oven.
Remembering this brings us joy, even on this painful day. Tucked between hard memories are these soft pillows of goodness, a comfort for our hearts as we grieve. The quiet minutes before I leave for the church offer more pillows of goodness — a chance to remember all God’s blessings during this hard journey.
Maybe you aren’t facing end-of-life issues for yourself or a loved one, but perhaps you’re facing end-of-marriage issues. Maybe you’re not physically sick but you’re worried sick over a wayward child. Perhaps you aren’t mourning the death of your dad but you’re mourning the lack of a dad for your children. Perhaps your father or your child’s father was, or is, absent due to separation, substance abuse, or health issues. Maybe it’s because of work demands, misplaced values, or mental illness.
At times, each of us will face something unbearably difficult. In John 16:33, Jesus says that we will all go through hard times. Yet, He also promises to give us everlasting joy, reminding us that He has overcome this pain-filled world. The loss of my dad? That qualifies as a trial — and so does whatever you’re facing today. Friends, I know this hard season may last for a while, and I know that I need to lean on my heavenly Father and His promises. So, I’ve bookmarked Psalm 136, and have welcomed its twenty-six verses to give me twenty-six reasons to give thanks for God’s faithful love. You’re probably familiar with the first verse: “Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever.” Psalm 136:23 is my favorite verse: “He remembered us in our weakness. His faithful love endures forever.”
Throughout my life, my dad was a pillar of strength whenever I was a puddle of tears. Now that he’s no longer here, I’ve been feeling weepy and weak. Although, perhaps, “weak” isn’t quite the right word. I think the better word is “weary.” As I’ve kept myself busy with all the tasks associated with a loss like this — partly out of necessity and partly out of an attempt to distract my bruised heart — I’ve become worn down. Maybe you’ve been there, too, whether because of a death or a move or a job change or the end of a relationship. Between being busy and deeply sad, we can end up so shaken and weary.
When this happens, God invites us to lean on Him . . . to accept the peace that surpasses human understanding. This is what is promised in Philippians 4:6-7: “Don’t worry about anything; Instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.”
When we feel weary, we need God’s Word to empower and remind us that we are more than conquerors. Those seasons when we feel weary with grief and exhaustion are exactly the times we most need to remember God’s promises:
- We are His children. (1 John 3:1)
- We are chosen and dearly loved. (Colossians 3:12)
Friends, if you’re in the middle of a hard season today, I encourage you to rest your soul and join me in thanking our heavenly Father for His love and constant presence. I pray we can remember His truth even when we are weary and our world is shaken. Let us thank Him for being our Daddy, our Abba, who invites us to rest in His love until we rest in His arms.